Damn it.

I've got so much to do, but this is what I'm doing! (That made no sense.)

Anyway, I was rereading ALL of the reviews for ALL of my stories (It's been a year since I joined! Can you believe it?) and I've decided that one small little oneshot wouldn't kill me…

Even though (you greedy, greedy readers XDD) I'm in the process of writing three ongoing fics, an ItaSakufic to celebrate the one year anniversary of my first fic (which was ItaSaku), and a Durarara! fic.

My computer is STILL totally fucked!

So I'm borrowing a laptop from my aunt.

I SHOULD be studying for the SAT that I'm taking Saturday or reading (it's more like rereading; out of four books, I read two in the seventh grade) the books for my summer work (yes, that shit again!)…or tracking a stock for my AP Government summer work…

But, I mean, whatever…no biggie.

*cries desperately*

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, but that would be the best consolation prize for all my trouble. Hear that, Kishimoto? Hint, hint.

-o0-

Last Night

-o0-

Sakura traversed the quiet streets of Konoha with no destination in mind. Honestly, she would have preferred to sleep on her day off…but when one's teammate was the infamously hyper Uzumaki Naruto, no sleep is to be found.

The pink-haired ninja was sure that Naruto was feeling the effects of his transgression most astutely and she was positive that with both his legs broken, Naruto would have to wait for her to return from her walk to feel any kind of relief. Although cruel, the idiot had decided to wake her up after she had spent the entirety of her week in the hospital attending to a swarm of injured teams and civilians.

"Sakura!" a voice called. "Forehead!"

Sakura ignored the voice pointedly, finding herself adverse to the idea of Ino wrangling her in a vicious search for sales throughout the village. There was Naruto to consider, after all. The poor blond idiot was more than likely still moaning on the floor of her kitchenette. "I don't have time for you, Pig."

"Wha-!" the aggravating girl cried, chasing after the pink-haired medic. "You don't have time for me? What could be more important than me? And where are you going? Do you have a date?" The questions streamed from Ino's mouth, only seeking to motivate Sakura into higher speeds of travel.

"Leave me alone, Pig!" Sakura yelled back. "I have a date with a blond idiot-"

"So you finally decided to go out with him," Ino concluded smugly.

"…who is writhing on the floor of my apartment in so much pain that he can't move."

"Kinky."

Sakura about-faced and confronted her follower, "What the hell is wrong with you? All I want is to sleep, but between you and Naruto it looks like I'll have another week long shift fuelled by soldier pills! I haven't had real food in a week!"

Ino flinched at the near-crazed look on her best friend/rival's face and decided on a course of action. "Forehead…why don't I buy you dinner? You're scaring the children."

Sakura looked around quickly and realized that Ino was right…she was in the middle of a park and was in fact scaring children. "Uh, um," she faltered, "sure."

Ino put an arm around the now calm medic and led her from the park to her favorite dining location. "Let's go in."

"Ino, this is a bar."

"And they serve food. So move!" the blonde commanded.

Time seemed to accelerate for Sakura as the people in the bar converged to the dance floor and the dancers seemed to meld into one organism, living and pulsing. The music was too loud and the sounds of people screaming, singing, kissing, and a whole medly of other activities was enough to make Sakura wish that Ino had taken her to a real food-serving establishment. She could barely focus on one particular object or person, even when her blonde friend had managed to procure a plate of fries and a sweet alcoholic beverage that tasted as though she had placed a cup of sugar straight onto her tongue. The lights too were distracting and the flashing streams of green, blue, and red hypnotized the tired Sakura into a dizzy state of awareness.

She barely managed to recall when Ino had disappeared from the bar table they were seated at with a faceless man to dance and Sakura felt her head sink to the table in a tired slump, the cool metal only slightly relieving the headache caused by the dizzying club. "Ino…pig…"

Slowly, her eyes slid shut into the beautiful darkness of the sleep depraved and the cacophonous sounds of the bar were purged from her cognizance with the exception of one last sensation…the feel of a muscled arm embracing her shoulders.

-o0-

Ino broke away from the freak she'd been dancing with, who did he think she was? Yamanaka Ino never, never dated or slept with civilians. Ever.

She pushed her way through the crowd back to where she'd left the exhausted medic that was her friend and had to double take. Where had she gone?

"Sakura?" she called frantically as she was drowned out by the sounds of the club. "Sakura!"

Ino instantly began to rationalize…Sakura was off dancing with some guy. But of course, even Ino wasn't able to accept the conclusion; Sakura didn't dance when she was on the verge of passing out.

The blonde began to push through the crowds, breaking up couples to peer at their faces in a futile attempt to locate her lost friend. "Sakura! Sakura! Sakura! Where are you!"

Realizing that Sakura couldn't be found through conventional methods, Ino stopped in the middle of the throng of dancing people, formed a common handsign and searched for any trace of the medic's chakra.

It was no use, Ino concluded as the tears welled in her blue eyes. Sakura had been exhausted, her chakra too weak to track even if it hadn't been masked by the stronger energies of other ninja in the bar. An idea struck the girl and she set out to find the familiar chakra of one of her many friends.

"Neji-kun!"Ino cried, throwing herself into the empty seat of his otherwise full table. "I need you!"

"Ooh! Neji-kun is popular!" the familiar voice of Shiranui Genma cat-called.

"Shut the hell up!" Ino snapped at the Jonin. "Neji, I need you to find Sakura!"

Neji looked rather irritated at having become the center of attention amongst his Anbu comrades and sent her a glare, "Why?"

"Yeah, Sakura-chan's a big girl~!" Genma laughed again.

Ino shot the man a glare and turned her gaze to Neji again, "She's beyond exhausted, like pass-out exhausted, and I left her at a table to go dance with some guy. When I came back, Forehead was gone!"

"What kind of friend leaves someone who is that tired alone at a bar?" another voice questioned in a bored tone.

"Shikamaru, I swear to God…" Ino threatened.

Neji held up a hand to stop the threat, "Give me a second."

Ino watched with hope as the Hyuuga formed the seals for his kekki genkai, "Please, Neji…"

"Byakugan!" he called as his eyes activated. Eventually, Neji sighed and released the technique.

"Anything?"

"Nothing. I'm sorry, I can't find her anywhere," Neji tilted his head apologetically. "She must have been taken from the premisis or she wandered away."

Ino bowed quickly and gave a quick wave, "Thanks. I've gotta go!"

"Good luck."

Ino once again pushed her way through the crowd to the entrance before making her way to the cold street that glowed with the lights spilling from the crowded bar. Ino vaguely realized that the sky had faded to dusk and her fear multiplied rapidly.

Quickly, Ino jumped to the rooftops and ran until she reached Sakura's apartment, sliding into an open window. "Sakura?" she called.

"Ino-chan, is that you?" a voice answered back.

Realizing the voice was from the kitchen, Ino stormed through Sakura's bedroom and hallway to the source, ranting as she went. "Forehead, you had me scared half to death! I thought some freak had abducted you or some shit-!"

"Ino-chan! It's Naruto…" the voice called miserably. "Sakura hasn't been back for hours and the fox can only regenerate so fast…I think my legs are still broken…!"

Ino paused at the sight of the mangled Naruto and let out a cry of frustration. "Where are you, Forehead!"

-o0-

Kiba was leisurely strolling the entertainment district with a girl under his arm as he did many nights when he had no mission scheduled for the following day. The girl was obviously very excited to be out with him, clearly, as she was hounding (pardon the pun) the Inuzuka to skip the bar and instead head to her place.

He almost answered in the affirmative, but his trained eyes caught on something unusual; a man carrying someone oddly familiar through a back alley. Once glance told Kiba that she was unconscious based on her slouched form and dangling arm, and he promptly told the girl to shut up.

He ignored her as she openly gaped at him and he flashed her a smile. "Sorry, girly, work calls!"

"Fine! I'll never talk to you again!"

Kiba gave a half wave as he slipped down the alley after the retreating figure and stuck to the dark shadows lining the narrow space between buildings. Whoever it was, Kiba figured, was a ninja. Their speed and stealthy clinging to the side of the building also told Kiba that whatever they were doing was not at all legitimate…

"Hey there, pal!" Kiba called, easily catching up with the darkened person. "Who're you?"

The figure sped up, shifting Sakura (Kiba could now tell who the victim was) over his shoulder as he jumped to the roof. Kiba easily followed the person and maintained a matching speed, "Hey," Kiba yelled, "who the hell are you?"

Kiba flared his chakra and channeled the energy to his legs, propelling him forward and allowing him to sweep a leg and trip the shadowed individual. Kiba reached out and caught Sakura from falling with her captor.

"Ugh…" the person groaned.

Kiba leaned forward and grasped the felled villian's chin, pulling their face into the light. Kiba's brows shot up, "Kotetsu?"

"Ugh…hey, Kiba…" he sat up. "Guess she lost."

"What the hell were you doing?" Kiba asked, shifting Sakura into his lap as he sat on the pavement of the rooftop facing the spiky-haired Chunin.

Kotetsu sighed as he ruffled his own hair, "Well, you see, Tsunade-sama made a bet."

"That explains a lot…but details?"

"Kakashi-san bet that Tsunade-sama was working Sakura so hard that she'd be unable to protect herself and the Godaime disagreed," Kotetsu laughed, "but she obviously lost this one."

Kiba shifted the unconscious medic again, "So they had you abduct her?"

"Y-yeah…" Kotetsu chuckled. "I've gotta give them the results, but I take it you'll be able to take her home?"

Kiba stood and nodded, "Sure."

The brown-haired Jonin watched as Kotetsu disappeared in a standard poof and sighed- he'd probably missed out on a relatively nice evening with that annoying girl. 'Nevermind…' he thought, instantly unregretful of the missed outing. Hefting Sakura's deadweight into a cradle, he jumped from the roof to a relatively crowded street below and began to walk.

'Well, Sakura-chan,' Kiba thought, 'looks like it's you and me this fine evening.'

Only after several minutes of walking the entertainment district streets did Kiba realize two very important points:

People were casting nervous glances his way- no doubt an effect of his carrying an unconscious girl through town.

He had absolutely no idea where Sakura lived.

At this, Kiba groaned angrily and addressed the sleeping Sakura, "You're a lot more trouble than you're worth, aren't you?" Kiba began to walk in the direction of his own house, knowing that his mother and sister were likely to be asleep. Staying out all night would bring misfortune on him in the morning at the hands of a cold or an irate Sakura, neither of which Kiba was inclined to face.

Suddenly, a devious idea popped into the Inuzuka's crafty mind…one that he simply had to follow through with, no matter the consequences.

-o0-

When Kiba reached his bedroom, he sought to recreate a common scene he'd experienced several times with the most clever and surreptitious of his skills, the skills to undress an unconscious woman.

Soon, his plan was perfect and after crawling under the covers next to the medic, Kiba knew that all he had to do was wait for dawn. Then all would come to fruition.

-o0-

When her eyes opened, Sakura was assaulted by the brightness of her room. Her sheets were unusually soft, she noticed as she stretched her arms out with a yawn. Sakura's eyes were cloudy with sleep and the shapes of her room were distorted but she paused one of her outstretched hands pressed against something unexpected.

She turned her head slowly and her other hand shot to her eyes, rubbing at them vigorously to clear the hazy details of Inuzuka Kiba, smirking and naked.

"Kiba! What the hell are you doing here? Why are you in my room?" she demanded frantically.

The Inuzuka leaned closely toward the medic and raised a hand to caress a loose strand of pink hair, "You don't remember?"

"Answer my question!"

He leaned closer still and his smirk widened, "First, 'kura-chan," she winced, "this is my room."

Sakura pulled back from him a tossed a glance at her surroundings, confirming his answer. "Oh my God…" she shuddered, "I'm getting the hell out of here."

"Sorry, but your clothes are all torn up," he chuckled, pulling her closer with a tug. "You're amazing."

Sakura froze as he nuzzled her neck and desperately tried to pull away, but he held her fast. "Kiba! Let me go!"

"Not so fast," Kiba commanded, "I thought we already played the 'hard-to-get' game, my coy mistress*?"

Sakura gave him a blank stare and renewed her efforts toward escape, "I'm not playing any game! Let me go!"

"That's not what you said last night."

"I don't remember last night!"

"Because it didn't happen."

"What." Sakura stopped and stared, demanding an explanation with a narrowing of her eyes.

Kiba kept hold of her arm, for his safety's sake, and laughed, "It was a prank, Sakura. We didn't actually do anything."

Sakura leveled a glare at the brunette and grit her teeth angrily, "So you lied. As a joke?"

Kiba shrugged, "Since I saved your ass last night, I figured some payback was in order. Can't you take a joke?"

"Has Naruto ever told you how I react to jokes?" she snapped, "How about I show you?"

Kiba barely managed to miss the fist flying toward his face and was surprised when he was ejected from his room through a shattered window and found himself laying in the road. "Wha―?"

It took a fraction of a second for Sakura to jump through the window wearing a pair of his boxers and one of his tee-shirts, and Kiba found himself slightly disappointed that she'd recovered her bra from the floor of his room. Within the two seconds it took Sakura to seize him, Kiba managed to think that she was damn cool with his clothes on and that he actually kinda liked Sakura on the verge of committing a massacre.

"Don't hold back," he breathed heavily as she began to drag him away from the pile of glass he'd been lying in.

"Oh, I won't," Sakura smiled. "I plan to make you my personal bitch for the rest of your life."

"Is it bad that I'm looking forward to it?"

-o0-

-o0-

-o0-

-o0-

I can't believe how long it took for me to write that.

It's actually been weeks since I started writing this oneshot and I'm a little disappointed with how it turned out to be honest.

Computer problems and school work have been such a PAIN.

Also, I'm writing an ItaSaku request fic that has taking me a lot longer than I had planned, but keep an eye out for it I suppose.

I'm sorry to my 'Not Good Enough' readers, but I'm afraid I have to put it on hiatus until further notice. I'm not sure where I'm going with it, but until I figure it out, please be calm.

This is my first story going on official hiatus (key word being 'official') and I'm disappointed with myself. So, sorry.

Anyway, thanks for reading this random oneshot.

T.T

AJlovesKakashi

P.S. I'm a Senior! Finally! Wheeeee!

*This was a reference to "To My Coy Mistress," which is a poem that we went over in AP English IV this morning. It's basically one sleezy pick-up line, but it's very nicely written.