Hey guys, so I'm back with another story. I've been struck by a major writing block and for me writing something else helps. So hence the new fanfic! Let me know what you guys think. Chapter 2 is ready so, if I get enough response to this I'll update quickly. Sorry for any mistakes!
Enjoy!
Chapter 1
The smell of stale beer and smoke invades my senses as I walk into the Irish pub. There are a couple of people seated at the bar, and only two tables are occupied. I'm early, and no one has showed up yet. After the case we closed this week, we all decided to celebrate but not after going home first and take some time to ourselves. My house really isn't my home, so a shower was all the time I needed for myself. I sit down in a booth and order red wine. The case had been tough, but luckily it was an easy solve. The woman had been raped after a night out and later told us she had felt like she was being watched for a couple of weeks. After some digging in her past we found an ex-boyfriend with some obsessive tendencies. We tracked him down and not long after that he confessed, saying that he'd never gotten the chance to sleep with her, and claimed that that was in his right since they were boyfriend and girlfriend back in the day. I shake my head to myself, after all these years it still amazes me how people's minds work. I've spent many a night thinking about this, trying to analyze where their behavior comes from. Why they do, what they do, and if they just make stuff up to cover up for the fact that they are cold blooded murders or if they actually believe their own reasoning for killing, raping, and beating people. It's a question I'll never know the answer too and quite frankly, maybe I don't want to know the answer too. The waitress walks over to my table, with my red wine in her hand. "Can I get you anything else, ma'am?" She smiles down at me. I look up and force a smile myself. Her accent reminds me of Amanda's.
"No thank you," I look at her name tag, "Kate, I'm good for now." She nods while walking away and leaves me alone to my thoughts again. How I hate being alone with the images that go through my mind. I hear the little ding of a bell going off and look at the door. There they are. Nick and Fin smile as they make their way over to my table, Amanda stays behind and walks straight to the bar. I furrow my eyebrows in confusion, that's strange. I see her impatiently tap her fingers on the bar, as if she's waiting for something, or someone. "Liv," Nick's voice pulling my attention to him as he nods his head in a greeting and Fin winks at me. "Hey," I smile at them. I feel a sense of comfort falling over me now that they are here. They understand what it's like, what goes through my head, what cases get me most, they understand me. They deal with the same thing. They settle down and start talking about their little time they had to themselves. I hear Nick talking about his daughter and Fin talks about his favorite TV show but my subconscious is paying more attention to my only female colleague than anything else. I can see her talking to someone, but can't get a clear view to see who it is. Amanda's eyes are wide and her fists are bald, laid down on the counter. She's leaning in close, speaking through her teeth, trying hard not to raise her voice. But I can see it in her eyes, the fear. Finally the people who are blocking my view move out of the way. She's talking to the waitress, who seems to get a kick out of Amanda's growing anger. I have this feeling in my gut that something is wrong here, I have a feeling that I need to step in but something is holding me back. I've always had these walls up when it comes to Amanda. Always felt afraid to get too close. Ever since the first time we've met I've always been cold with her, never really showing how much I care. And I care, a lot. Silently from a distance. Not anymore though.
I stand up from the booth, "I'm going to get us something to drink, the usual?" I ask the guys. They both nod, a little surprised by my sudden movement. I walk away from the table and towards the bar where Amanda's anger has turned into seething. She's no longer talking through her teeth, no longer are her hands bald on the countertop. She's talking, but it's still not hearable over the music that plays. She's gesturing with her hands and she's standing fully upright now. The closer I get the worse the energy become, and it always makes me mad. Finally I reach her, as soon as she notices me she puts a smile on her face.
"Hey, Liv, I was about to meet you guys at the table. I was just orderin' some drinks." I can still see the rage in her eyes. I raise one of my eyebrow making it clear that I don't buy her crap.
"Really, well, isn't that a convenience, I was just about to order some drinks myself." I turn towards Kate, who seems amused at all of it. The fact that Amanda is out raged and now hiding it, and the fact that I made it clear I don't believe a word of what she just said. "Kate, can I get another red wine, and two beers?" She laughs, which pisses me off. "Something funny?" I bend over the bar, trying to get closer as I stare her dead in her eyes. She swallows her laugh away and her eyes show fear, intimidated by me. It always works, on any perp, on anyone. She shakes her head and moves to the other side of the bar to get the drinks. I turn towards the blonde detective. "What was that about?"
"I don't know what you're talking about," she replies quickly.
"Don't play dumb with me, 'Manda," I cross my arms in front of my body.
"It's nothing, Benson, just forget about it," she brushes a hand through her slightly wavy hair, clearly uncomfortable.
"Fine, what do you want?" I turn away from her, towards the bar. Watching Kate walk back over to us.
"Huh?" I hear her softly, confused.
"To drink? What do you want to drink?" I still can't look at her, annoyance taking the best of me. I really loath people not being straight forward with me.
"Oh, I'll have a white wine," She is now the one to cross her arms in front of her, her head down. Either not willing to look at me or afraid of being confronted by Kate again. The waitress places the drinks in front of me, I grab those and order Amanda's white wine. I turn away, leaving Amanda behind.
I sit down, and hand the boys their drinks. I look back and see Amanda making her way over to us. She catches me staring at her and quickly adverts her eyes to the guys. "Hey guys," she smiles before scooting in the only available space, next to me. She lets out a sigh and starts to relax. I keep looking at her, wondering what the hell is going on, she turns to me, her voice low and the boys too busy to hear what she has to say, "Hey, uhm, thanks…"
"For what?" I said, not giving in that easy.
"For interrupting us back there," She nods towards the bar and Kate.
"I didn't know I was interrupting anything," I raise an eyebrow. She just smiles. Knowing exactly what I'm doing.
"Well, thanks anyway," She says while looking down at her hands that are cupping her wine glass like it's her lifeline.
"You're welcome, I guess," I look away and take a sip of my wine. Fin looks at us and raises his glass.
"To yet another case solved," We all raise our glasses with him. And before we take another sip, Amanda and I look at each other, both having questions that are yet to be answered
