Me: Hi there everyone! This is my first fic ever! I was actually given this idea by my big cousin Tsukimomo, who is here with me right now!!
Tsuki: Why do I have to be a part of this, Marie?
Me: Cos I said so, got it?
Tsuki: DON'T YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT!!
Me: Oh and just because you're older than me that means you get to boss me about?
Tsuki: Yes. Now do the disclaimer otherwise every review I send you for the rest of your life will have a random weirdo in it that jumps out of the computer and begin to beat you up.
Me: Fine, fine. I don't own Bobobo. I just wished my aunt didn't own Tsuki otherwise she wouldn't be here.
Tsuki: That's it, I'm outta here!
Me: Wait! This fic is all about torturing Gas-Can!
Tsuki: It is? I'm staying!
- - -
Gasser walks on stage. Spot light shines on him.
Me: This is Gasser.
Gasser: Hi.
Me: Gasser is fourteen and has a crush on Beauty.
Gasser: NO I DON'T!!
Me: Gasser hair is spiky because when he was born, he was born the other way around.
Gasser: HEEEEEY! How did she know that?
Me: Gasser is scared of Barney the Dinosaur.
Gasser: That's insane! I'm not scared of Barney the Dinosaur!!
Author places life size replica of Barney the Dinosaur next to Gasser.
Gasser: OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! BARNEY THE DINOSAUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me: Did you know, Gasser has a shower instead of a bathtub because he's scared of water?
Gasser: No I'm not!!!
Me: Gasser also wears pink furry underwear.
Gasser: YOU'RE CRAZY!!!!!!!!
Me: Why thankyou.
Gasser: That wasn't a compliment!!!!!!!
Me: Gasser is scared of spiders.
Gasser: Ha! Is if I'd be scared of spiders.
Author starts chasing Gasser in a spider costume.
Gasser: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! SPIIIDERRR!
Me: And now to read a page from Gasser's diary.
Gasser: Ah! Where'd you get that?!
Me: It was in your pant pocket. And now, I command you, Diary. Read to us a page written in you!
Diary: Certainly. 'Last night, a had the greatest dream ever. I was with Beauty. Our lips pressed together. They felt so light and delicate.'
Gasser: That's not true! I didn't write that!!
Me: Thankyou for that, Diary. This just in! Gasser likes to lick other peoples feet!
Gasser: That is gross! You need some help!
Me: But I'm not hurt or anything.
Gasser: Not that kind of help.
Me: Do you envy Hatenkou?
Gasser: No. Why?
Me: Really? Cos I heard that Beauty is so into Hatenkou.Yep. I feel sorry for you
Gasser: But...No way! I'm not gonna believe you! Almost everything you've said about me is a lie. The only things that you got right are my name and age.
Me: And you have a crush on Beauty.
Gasser: And I have a crush on Beau- NO I DON'T!!
Me: You don't like Beauty?
Gasser: No way.
Me: (Hugging Beauty) Don't worry, Beauty. He didn't mean it.
Gasser: What the? Beauty what are you doing here?
Beauty: (Actually Bobobo dressed up as Beauty but Gasser doesn't know yet) You said you didn't like me! I'll hate you forever!!
Gasser: Wait you're not Beauty!! Mr. Bobobo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY ARE YOU DRESSED LIKE BEAUTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bobobo: (Still dressed as Beauty) How could you say I look like Bobobo! I'm much more prettier than him! I'm leaving!
Bobobo walks of the stage still dressed as Beauty while crying.
Gasser: Could this day get any worse than it already is?
Me: (Eating tofu dipped in miso on a stick) Hey Gasser? Why does every girl in this playboy magazine have Beauty's face stuck over the original face?
Gasser: Where the heck did you get that!?!?!?!?!?!
Me: In your pocket along with your diary.
Gasser: I wanna die, T.T
Me: This just in! Gasser is a cry baby emo!
Gasser: I'm not a cry baby emo!
Me: Hey Gasser, you dropped this photo of Beauty in the shower.
Gasser: Ahhh! Hey give that back!! I paid a lot of money for that!
Gasser starts chasing the author.
Me: Whaah! Why'd you have to pick on the little guy!?
Gasser: You're not even a guy!
Me: I don't care!! It's not fair!! You're picking on me!
Gasser: That's exactly what you've been doing to me all day!!!!!!
Me: I know. Beauty!!!
Beauty walks onto the stage. Author hides behind Beauty.
Beauty: What is it Marie?
Me: (Fake tears) Gasser's picking on me!
Gasser: That's a lie and you know it! You're the one who's been picking on me all day!
Beauty: Gas-Can, how dare you pick on Marie. (Cracks knuckles) You are so gonna pay.
Beauty begins to chase Gasser.
Me: Well folks that's all we have time for. Bye bye now.
- - -
Me: Wasn't that awesome!?
Tsuki: I've seen better.
Me: It ain't fair! Why did you have to look after me tonight?
Tsuki: Cos Aunty Shirley paid me.
Me: Please review! I could do with another friend.
