Title: Worst Case Scenario

Author: runrunnow (via NinjaNerds production)

Disclaimer: Identifiable Characters belong to their respective authors. Only the scenarios belong to us. No sue. God will smite you.

Author's Note: Something my brother and I came up with over dinner. Stemmed out from the question, "what's the worst thing that could happen?" And this just popped out. Borrows from series such as the Planeteers, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and a little bit of Rurouni Kenshin.

Scene number 1:

There are two people in a small, cramped house. We'll call them Person A and Person B. They are seated on opposite sides of the table, having tea. They are probably really large men. The teacups are tiny and pink. The teacups could fit in a teacup that could fit in the palm of your hand.

They hold the teacups by the handle, with their thumb and forefinger (pinky finger sticking out).

The accident happens.

Person A is drinking from the tiny teacup and suddenly swallows the teacup. It is lodged in his throat. He starts to choke, and claws his neck, trying to force the teacup down, and clear his airway. Insert dying/ choking noise here.

To make matters worse. The telephone rings incessantly. No one picks it up. Someone is ringing the doorbell repeatedly. The kitchen is on fire. And Person A is powerless, having a teacup lodged in his throat.

Person B is overcome with a fit of laughter. He is unable to answer the phone,answer the doorbell, or prevent the kitchen from bursting into flames. As he tries to catch his breath, his own tiny teacup zooms into his throat. He too is clawing his neck to get the teacup to clear his airway.

Imagine the combined impact of a loud ringing telephone, an erratic doorbell, a kitchen ablaze, and two large men rolling on the floor, clawing their throats.

Scene Number Two

Not really a tea party, but a sort of prelude to scene 3.

"Earth!"

"Water!"

"Wind!"

"Fire"

"Heart!"

"When your powers combine, I am LORD VOLDEMORT!"

and he proceeds to kill the whole world.

Imagine the look on the faces of the Planeteers. And all they wanted to do was to save the whales.

Scene Number Three:

Something we would like to call the Villains' Party.

There is a table. On one end of the table is Lord Voldemort, in his black robes and snake-like face. To his right is Sauron, the floating giant eyeball. To Voldemort's left is Shishio, someone I think most of you aren't familiar with. Anyway, he's an anime villain who looks like a mummy because he was burned from head to foot but survived. On the other end of the table is Hitler. They are having tea.

First, some light conversation:

VOLDEMORT: So I'm trying to kill this kid right? And he just won't stay dead, you know?

SAURON: I see. (He's a floating eyeball, get it?)

SHISHIO: You don't say?

HITLER: Mein hinterteil verletzen! Vergewaltigen bei der Satan!

Then, disaster strikes.

VOLDEMORT: (accidentally swallows the tiny teacup and clawing his throat to clear his airway) through the teacup What sorccery is this?

SAURON: I see you...

HITLER: Gefahr! Gefahr!

SHISHIO: pours scalding tea on himself and bursts into flames runs around the table, flinging his arms around

SAURON: I see you.