Disclaimer: I own way too many post-it notes and a fiance who is jealous of my love for Edward.
I don't own Twilight or The Bachelor.
Please don't sue me :)
I was going to kill her.
I stared at the phone in my hand, repeating the mantra over and over in my head.
Maybe if I said it enough, I wouldn't feel this sinking, clawing tightness in my chest.
"Edward Cullen do not be such a BABY! This is a GOOD thing, a great thing! Why cant you see that?"
Oh god, I was going to be arrested for beating up someone who was barely 5 feet tall. They would never believe me when I told them how vicious my sister was. I was 27, and she was only 2 years younger than me. But sometime in that gap, she had managed to wrap our family around her little pinky finger, all the while flicking me in the eye with the other.
I was going to kill her.
I wasn't necessarily mad. She did shit like this all the time. I guess it was her way of showing me she cares. Something about her worrying about me being single for so long, which was laughable really. Its not that I couldnt get women; I went through the playboy phase in highschool, and okay, most of my first year of med-school. But I grew up, I got over it, and I don't really have time to go looking for quick fucks right when Im working 18 hour shifts at the hospital.
But to go to these lengths? And behind my back?
I was going to kill her.
Alice pulled the phone out of my hand, slinging it on the bed as she yanked my chin up.
"Now you listen here bucko: you're going to do this for several reasons, which since you are an idiot, I am going to lay out for you like the sweet sister I am."
I snorted at that.. sweet little sister my ass.
"One: you are way too old to be single. Don't give me that look, I get it, I really do.. no more fuck and chuck.. you want the real thing.. An-"
"You think Im going to find the real thing on a DATING SHOW?!"
I simultaneously wanted to laugh at her and strangle her.
"Yes, shut up. Reason two: Edward you know mom wants to see you get married, she wants grandbabies.. and Jasper and I.."
I could only sigh.. it was true. Our mother Esme had been battling cancer for a long time, and we all knew her desire to see her children as blissed out in love as she was was a major point of her determination to stick around.
"Ali.. " I sighed. She was winning the argument already, and we were only at number two.
How did Jasper do this on a daily basis?
"Shhh… okay, number three… it is an absolutely credible show. You don't even need to be your boring, intolerable self, they'll give you good lines and everything, but you still get 25 amazing women, all ready to throw themselves at your feet, are you seriously arguing.."
I let her words blend into the background of my mind. I was pretty good at that after all these years. Anyway, it didn't matter: I was going to do it. I was going to do it because she wouldn't shut up unless I did. I was going to do it because, yes, it would make my mom fucking ecstatic. But also because.. as much as I hated to admit it, a small, small part of me thought: who knows, maybe shes out there?
But I squelched that thought right where it started, because I was a fucking realist.
And I was America's next Bachelor.
Fuck.
Hi! This is my first story... just a little something to get my creative juices flowing.
I'm definitely not a writer and don't have any plans to become one, and this is kind of just something I wanted to try for fun.
I love reading fanfiction and thought this would be a cute idea. Basically this story started with me wanting to read a fic where Edward was on a show like the bachelor and not being able to find one that wasn't either incomplete/deserted or not to my liking.. (no offense if you have a similar story out there, Im sure it's awesome lol)
sooo anyway, I thought I'd write my own for kicks. We'll see how it goes :)
