Disclaimer: This story line belongs to me. Anything that has to do with fifty shades of grey belongs to E L James. My stories are also posted on Wattpad as original stories if you would like to read them there.

A/N: Hi everyone, I hope you will enjoy this story. Please comment and let me know what you think!

Summary:

Christian Grey came into my life like a dark thunderstorm...

He was handsome and dangerously mysterious. I was drawn to him as a moth to a burning flame. I craved his touch, even knowing that it would weaken me.

I was completely damaged. Ever since I'd moved to Athens, Alabama at the age of twelve I had been the quiet, full of anxiety strange girl. The small town that watched me grow was the same that judged me for my demons.

Christian was like me, dark and full of secrets. The secrets that surrounded him brought us closer and apart.

The bonds of his love transformed me, even as I prayed that the torment of his past didn't tear me apart.


PROLOGUE:

"Ana, how about we start with what has brought you here?" Doctor Ackerman proposed as she sat across for me on a black sectional couch. Her office was not the typical therapist office, the well-known clinical feeling was not present, instead green plants were scatter through the room giving it a soothing effect. However, the room was not the only thing that separated this spacious office from previous therapist offices I'd seen, and oh boy had I seen my fair share of therapist. My therapy journey had started at the age of twelve years old.

My aunt Bethany Hamilton had thought that a twelve year old who'd lost her parents in a plane crash needed to be in therapy twice a week. I pushed down the resentment issues I'd grown to have for her and focused on the now. Doctor Ackerman was younger then the usual therapist with only having open the office three months prior, she was new to the business and this town. She was also a very attractive woman, her hair was a light-shade of blond and was neatly pulled back into a chignon. She was wearing a white cashmere sweater and black dressy pants. She was the image of warmth and kindness.

She took her black frame glasses off and politely waited for my answer to her question. I inhaled a mouthful of air as I looked down at my burgundy red fingernails with wonder of what she'd meant by the question? I begged my mind to stay focus, but all I could think about was how loudly and distracting the awful ticking of the clock placed behind on the wall was.

I wondered if previous clients had also been annoyed by the awful clock ticking? I allowed my mind for a split second to be angry at my aunt for forcing me to seek help again. She'd done it in a way that had made me wonder if she even loved me. I wish I'd never agreed to my aunts terms. After all, everyone in Athens knew I'd done all the hard work to make Hug in a mug cafe what it was now. My famously known pastries kept the cafe open and out of financial trouble.

"Ana did you hear me?" Dr. Ackerman brought me back to the conversation.

"I don't know what to say." I exclaimed anxiously.

"How about we start easy?" She encouraged me, " tell me something about yourself?"

"There is not a lot to me." I answered wanting this to be over already. The anxiety of sitting in front of her was overwhelmingly frightening.

"I'm sure that's not true Ana," She said writing something down on her tablet, "What do you do for a living?"she coaxed.

I took a deep breath and tried to relax, "I work at my aunts' restaurant. I don't know if you'd heard of it?... Hug in a mug cafe?"

"Oh, of course, they have amazing food." she smiled, "What do you do there?" she asked as she looked down at her tablet once again.

"I'm a pastry chef." I smiled as I said it. It had always been my happy place, baking cakes made me relax and kept my anxiety down.

"Wait is it you that makes the delicious peach tarts?"

I nodded my head.

"They are my favourite dessert, you have talent Ana."

I looked down at my nails as she said that, compliments made me feel shy.

"How about your love life? Do you have a partner?" she quickly change the conversation to a subject I was not comfortable talking about.

"No, I don't," I muffled. It had been years since the last relationship I'd had. I wasn't sure the right man for me was out there; a man who could handle all of my problems and insecurities.

Doctor Ackerman wrote more down and it made me feel anxious, did she think I was weird for not having a man in my life?

"What is it that brought you here today Ana?"

I took another deep breath and thought about her question. I had regretted coming here the moment I had stepped foot into the elevator. My aunt had made it clear if I wanted to inherit Hug in a Mug Cafe I needed to work on my problems. I knew she had hated the moment I had stopped attending my therapy at the age of eighteen, but now she had another reason to force it upon me.

"My aunt thought this could be good for me." I decided it was best to keep the part where I was completely manipulated by her to come here today.

"Why do you think she thought that?' she inquired.

"Because I don't really like going out anywhere I might have to face people... except the cafe, but I spend most of the day in the back." I admittedly answered. I was surprised at how blunt I was being. I'd seen other therapist before but none had been able to get me to feel comfortable enough to open up.

"When was the last time you were out in public aside from work?" Dr. Ackerman questioned, making me dread answering.

My gaze doesn't meet hers fearing what she will think of me as I answer. "Well, it depends what you mean."

"Ana, when was the last time you went out with a friend or on a date?" Dr. Ackerman pushed me to open.

I stayed quiet thinking, "Two years." I quietly answered. The last man I had dated had made things worse. He had shared everything I had told him in confidence.

"Two years?" Dr. Ackerman looked surprised.

"Yes." I shyly answered her. "My last relationship didn't turn out well."

"Why do you think it didn't work out?"

"He didn't understand or accepted my agoraphobia," I answered truthfully.

"Agoraphobia is a serious disorder Ana. It is also hard for people to understand." She took a deep breath and asked her next question. "What made you decide you needed help now?" She asked moving closer to the edge of her seat.

"I'm afraid I'll eventually not be able to leave my house at all."

"How does that make you feel?"

"Scared," I admitted, I have been living a big nightmare for the last ten years since the awful accident that killed my parents.

"You must feel more than scared." She pushed me to look deeper into the matter.

"I'm afraid this horrible disorder will end my life," I whispered my darkest feeling. I knew I was close to losing myself to the disorder.

"Agoraphobia can seem scary and I'm glad you decided to get help." Dr. Ackerman smiled. "I have a program that can potentially work for you. However, it requires a lot of commitment, but it has had great results with other patients that I have treated with this kind of disorder."

"I think I'm ready to do that." I truthfully answered. This had started because of my aunt, yet everything Dr. Ackerman had said made sense to me.

"Before we get into that, how about you tell me about your parents?"

I took a deep breath as it is hard for me to speak about my parents. "They passed away when I was very young."

"How old were you when they died?"

I brought my gaze up for a second and then looked back down at the floor, "I was twelve."

Dr. Ackerman stayed quiet for a moment, "That's a horrible age to lose a parent."

"It was horrible. I had to move from New York to Alabama and into my aunts' house. I didn't talk for a whole year."

"I can understand how that could of had been awful for you Ana, a lot of the times trauma like the death of a parent can bring a side of us we didn't know we had." she moved closer to the edge of her seat, "Before we get into the program, I need to ask you a question. I like to ask this question to all my patients."

"Oh?" I said wondering what she was about to ask me.

"How committed are you on your recovery?" Dr. Ackerman asked, and I knew I needed to be truthful if I wanted this to work out.

"I'm not sure how committed I can be with something that scares me this much." I bring my gaze up once more to look at Dr. Ackerman and I could see no judgment in her face.

"What scares you the most?"

"The fact that I need to sit here and talk to you."

"I bet it makes you anxious." she told me and I knew she understood me.

I nodded my head in mutual agreement.

"I believe you need to take small steps Ana; the time it takes you isn't the problem. You need to do it at your own time without triggering your anxiety. Perhaps you need to follow the five steps."

"The five steps?" I asked confused.

"Yes. How about you try to work on step number one for our next session?" Dr. Ackerman asked, and I agreed. "The first step is to go out and introduce yourself to one new person. Perhaps writing down what you want to say could work for you. Maybe it can be a customer at the restaurant you work at, or at the park. I want you to write down everything you feel after you do so, and I'll see you back in two weeks."

I thought about everything Dr. Ackerman had said and decided that the only way to move on with my life was to fix myself. "I will try it," I said loudly and prepared myself to face the biggest challenge of my life.