CRUSH…. OR IS IT LOVE

I just hung up the phone and breathed heavily. I was talking with Hermione. After the war, she and I became a lot closer than I thought. We became a lot closer after the fateful night Ron left us. Speaking of my two best friends, they never got together. Well, they did kissed but Hermione said they were better off as friends. Which made me glad, I didn't realise why I was so glad at that time. The answer came to me some months ago.

We were fighting. More like arguing. Hermione was complaining about me dating different girls and not settling down. I started dating different girls for lust because I didn't get the girl I wanted. None of those girls lasted more than two weeks. The latest one just dumped him because of Hermione and he was talking with her about it. Suddenly both of us started screaming. I remember nothing but that she said that she doesn't want me to be with anyone else but her. I hung up the phone and just stood here shocked.

Maybe she felt something more than a friend for me. Maybe she loved me. Maybe she's in love with me like I am with her. I guess it's crazy or I am falling really hard for Hermione. I remembered Ginny and Cho. I felt something for them. A crush. But all the other girls I've dated were lust. But what I feel for Hermione is more than a crush.

I sat on the carpet of our living room and thought all about the times we spent together and all that would happen if we got together. Maybe like me she thinks about all this when she is alone. I remembered the time after the war at a party at my house. All of our friends went home and I offered Hermione to stay over and she gladly accepted. After some minutes I started tickling her. After this tickling war she was lying underneath me and I was almost about to kiss her, then I got my control back. I hurried over and went to the kitchen to start cleaning up. Maybe like me she thinks what will happen if we kissed.

I remembered the time at the Yule ball. I caught a breath when I realized the girl in Krum's arm was Hermione. In her periwinkle blue robes. Does she catch a breath when she sees me, like me? There are many memories where I am almost about to kiss Hermione. It will ruin our years of friendship. Maybe she also doesn't make the first move because she thinks it will ruin their friendship.

I tried getting over her. I tried getting serious with all the girls she dated. But I just can't. I tried to get over my crush for Hermione lots of time. But I just can't walk away. I have fallen for the bookish, know-it-all Hermione Granger. I just can't walk away. It'd kill me.

I hung up the phone. She didn't. WHY am I running from the truth. Maybe she's in love with me too. When I am not around her I think about her. I always see her smile before I perform a patronus. I didn't know but the only thing that kept me fighting Voldemort was that I'd see her again.

Every time something happens I think about her. She got me hypnotized. I am mesmerized by her actions of saving my pathetic ass every time I am in danger. I just have to know if she feels the same way I feel about her.

Hermione and I always hung out at each other's place or with each other. I remember the time when both of us were hanging out in the park near her house. It is one of my personal favorites. She was wearing a light pink cotton shirt, with a pair of jeans. She looked absolutely adorable. We sat on a bench in the park. Instinct perhaps, Hermione rested her head on my shoulder and I put an arm around her waist. After some a very old married couple came and said, 'Ah, I remember young love' and looked at each other very dearingly.

Hermione blushed furiously, which is one of the reasons I loved that afternoon, and corrected their mistake. But they just smiled and said to each other that we were still in denial and walked hand in hand smiling. She moved away from me.

We, after a few more hours of hanging out, went to Hermione's house to watch a movie. I selected a movie and we watched. I chose a movie that I saw, so that I could think if really there was something meant to be between us. Is there really something more than 'just friends'?

I always spent sleepless nights thinking about this. Maybe they are right. They had to be. How could I not believe a happily old married couple? They have to know everything about love.

I believe we have to take a chance. Because I knew in my heart that it will not last with any other girl. It will only last with my best friend. But I dated. I dated many girls. Who are nothing compared to Hermione. Oh sod it; I need to go to Hermione's place. I stood up and apparated.

I felt the familiar lurch and tug of apparation and I was in front of Hermione's house. After the war nobody bothered to put up anti-apparation wards. Though Hermione did. Only she, Ron and I could come in.

I didn't bothered to knock. I straight walked in and saw Hermione curled up on the sofa. I went near her and saw stained tears on her eyes. Okay, now, I feel like an absolute jerk.

I stroke some hair from her face. She surely didn't cry for me. Or did she? I was hypnotized looking at her. Maybe this is falling in love. I've surely heard Ron speak of it. Suddenly with a soft yawn Hermione woke up. She looked startled seeing me in front of her and jumped and sat on the couch, leaving me kneeling on the ground.

"Harry Potter, don't you dare scare me like that again?" She screamed, trying to hide her tears and her now-not-so-uncontrollable-hair. She did keep on lecturing me.

"Did you cry after I hung up?" I asked simply.

"Umm... I... Well..." I saw Hermione lost for words once in my entire life. I knew I have to say my speech before I lost my courage.

"Becuase if you are, I wanna tell you something. I loved you since you first walked in and asked for Neville's toad. I thought maybe it was a crush when you came to the Yule ball with Krum. I realized I am in love with you some months ago. I was shocked at what you said on the phone so I hung up." I saw Hermione opening her mouth to talk but I stopped her, with a finger on her lips. "I spent all this time figuring out if you liked me or not. I can't hold it any longer 'Mione, do you really like me like the way I do?"

I took a deep breath and looked at her. Silently praying she felt the same and a little shocked at what I said. She also like me looked shock and nodded a small no. I felt like and idiot.

"Oh... well... I'll just go then." I said lamely and then slowly backing from her. It was a pain for me just to stand near her. But I had unanswered questions too. Why did she cry? Why did she say she didn't want me to be with anyone else? I was about to ask these questions when I sensed her lips on mine.

All my thoughts were shut off as I placed one of my hands on her waist another one her cheeks. After some moments I realised that I was kissing the girl who just turned me down. It took all my will power to move myself away from and look at her into her eyes.

"You just turned me down, and now you're kissing me?" I asked a little irritated at her.

"You only asked me if I liked you. How could if I have fallen in love with you?" She asked.

"Are you telling what I think you're saying?" I asked.

"I am saying I am in love with you."

"I love you too." And with that I kissed her until breathing was necessary.

Life is definitely going to be good for me now that Hermione's with me. Maybe someday we'll be old like that couple and we'll be happy. I am sure we'll be happy. I know we'll love each other until death.

THE END