Private Bet #9: Genma Gets It
Stone contributed by Gregg Sharp
Disclaimer: Series used from other people,
Almost all of this is Metroanime's work.
Enjoy.
~~~~~~~~
"Just change the angle here. See?" Kharon flipped a grain
of sand into the pool.
"This should be interesting." Rowan hadn't seen that angle ever done before.
-------------------------------------------------
Ranma blocked and counterpunched, sending his father off into a spring.
"GOTCHA!" Ranma paused as the spring bubbled. "Hey, pop! What's up?
We done already?"
Something came rocketing up out of the pool. Ranma's expression changed
from cocky to horrified. "No, no, it can't be. NO!!"
"That is 'Spring Of Drowned Cat', terrible tragic story of..."
Ranma wasn't listening. With a screech of terror he fled,
the meowing and angry cat lagging just a few steps behind.
---------------------------------
Ryouga heard the scream first, then saw him. Ranma, his cursed rival,
running right towards him. "Now, Ranma, you shall pay for the insult of the bread!"
"Ryouga! HELP! HELPMEPLEASEPLEASE!" Ranma shot past him at high speeds.
Ryouga blinked. That's odd. That didn't go nearly how he'd rehearsed it.
A cat shot past Ryouga while he was trying to figure out why RANMA
of all people would be pleading for help from HIM. Keeping the cat in sight,
Ryouga began to chase after them. When he caught up with Ranma, he'd find out what
was going on, THEN he could have his revenge for running out on the man-to-man duel.
He'd never seen such horror in someone's face, and Ryouga's curiosity
was quite piqued. After all, making Saotome's life hell was supposed to
be *his* job!
------------------------------------------------
"THE WINNER!"
Shampoo posed in her moment of glory, taking the title of Champion for the
second year running!
"aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"
WHAM CRASH! Teeter CRASH! THUD!
"Meow meow meow meow MEOW mew meow!"
"Ranma, you (puff) get (huff) back here!"
Shampoo woozily got out of the crater she'd made when she'd been run
over and noticed that there had been some changes made in the Village. The
bathing center over there had a new entryway. The challenge log had apparently been
knocked loose and it had run over a half dozen warriors. There was also a trail of
flattened amazons that led from the village gate, over herself, and to the bathhouse.
"Shampoo," Cologne said from her staff. "An outsider male has just defeated
you. What are you going to do?"
"Was he cute?" Shampoo asked, still a little woozy. "What?! No way! I
wasn't ready for it. That can't possibly count. Let's see him try that again!"
"aaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHAAHHAAAAAAA!!"
WHAM THUDTHWACKCRASHBAMCRUNCH
"Meow meow meow meow meow hiss spit meow meow MEOW!"
"Pardon me, miss, I didn't see you, oops, sorry. Gomenasai. Ranma!
you come back here and apologize to these women!"
Cologne picked herself off the ground, and watched dozens of other
amazons doing the same. "Lilac! If an outsider male defeats an amazon, she
must give the kiss of marriage and marry him. What does it say when two outsider
men defeat a large number of amazons and run away?"
Lilac adjusted her glasses and checked the Big Book Of Amazon Law.
"Hmmm, let see. Case of Cola Vs Kohi. Hmmm. Also see reference: Case of Jam Vs Jelly.
I see. Well, there's two things. The first girls to catch him get to keep him.
And in the case of simultaneous or near simultaneous, they have to share him.
So that means whoever finds their husband before everybody else gets first dibs on him."
There was a brief moment of silence as the crowd
absorbed this interesting little tidbit.
"WO DA AIREN! WO AI NI!" The cry erupted from a hundred
throats as a large number of husband-hungry amazons joined the chase.
The sad thing was, this would turn out to be the
*least* of Ranma's problems in the near future.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Genma was learning about one of the drawbacks of being a cat firsthand.
Dogs. BIG dogs. With *lots* of sharp teeth.
And they looked *very* hungry.
Divine Retribution can be a real bitch.
~~~~~~~~~
Panting from sheer exhaustion, Ranma finally stopped
running and collapsed onto the ground. He'd finally
managed to lose the c-c-ca-ca-ca... furry thing that he
was afrai-er..just couldn't stand to be near.
Some vague surrealistic memories of his race
from the monster that had replaced his father
popped into his head. There had been those
strange pale looking women talking in Chinese,
a weird zombie with an electric guitar fighting
with some lady wearing bat wings and not much else,
and some big guy with an even bigger sword accompanied
by a little girl.
Ranma shook his head and managed a nervous
cough, he *must* have imagined it all.
After a few minutes the tired martial artist
felt strong enough to take a good look around.
His heart sank as he took in his unfamiliar surroundings.
"Where on Earth am I now?!"
~~~~~~~~~
Ryoga looked around all of a sudden.
He had a strange feeling that he needed to see a lawyer.
In hindsight, he really shouldn't have
picked that particular moment to stop.
Dowel, Sponge, Lye, and the rest of the larger
boned Amazons in the unmarried 25 years+ age
bracket all dogpiled on their new husband.
Peace among them only lasted until they
delivered their Kisses of Marriage.
Almost immediately an argument over who had
first claim to the wedding night started up
among them.
If Ryoga had been conscious at that moment
he would have blamed Ranma for this too.
~~~~~~~~~
-Nerima
Several unrelated events took
place almost simultaneously.
A freak gale of wind blew apart the Tendo Dojo.
Fortunately only Akane and Soun Tendo were in
there at the time so nobody of any real importance
was hurt.
Several bolts of lightning hit the roof of the
Kuno mansion and caused a fire that was quickly
put out, but not before revealing a large and
rather disturbing collection of perverted
photographs hidden beneath Tatewaki Kuno's
bedroom floor.
Happosai managed to blast his way out of his
rocky tomb a few weeks ahead of schedule.
Unfortunately for the perverted martial arts master,
the bombs he'd used turned out to be just a *wee*
bit too powerful. It would take him another month
to dig his way out of the rubble.
And Mikado of the Golden Pair was run over by a semi.
Several times.
Very not so tragic story.
-to be continued...(?)
Stone contributed by Gregg Sharp
Disclaimer: Series used from other people,
Almost all of this is Metroanime's work.
Enjoy.
~~~~~~~~
"Just change the angle here. See?" Kharon flipped a grain
of sand into the pool.
"This should be interesting." Rowan hadn't seen that angle ever done before.
-------------------------------------------------
Ranma blocked and counterpunched, sending his father off into a spring.
"GOTCHA!" Ranma paused as the spring bubbled. "Hey, pop! What's up?
We done already?"
Something came rocketing up out of the pool. Ranma's expression changed
from cocky to horrified. "No, no, it can't be. NO!!"
"That is 'Spring Of Drowned Cat', terrible tragic story of..."
Ranma wasn't listening. With a screech of terror he fled,
the meowing and angry cat lagging just a few steps behind.
---------------------------------
Ryouga heard the scream first, then saw him. Ranma, his cursed rival,
running right towards him. "Now, Ranma, you shall pay for the insult of the bread!"
"Ryouga! HELP! HELPMEPLEASEPLEASE!" Ranma shot past him at high speeds.
Ryouga blinked. That's odd. That didn't go nearly how he'd rehearsed it.
A cat shot past Ryouga while he was trying to figure out why RANMA
of all people would be pleading for help from HIM. Keeping the cat in sight,
Ryouga began to chase after them. When he caught up with Ranma, he'd find out what
was going on, THEN he could have his revenge for running out on the man-to-man duel.
He'd never seen such horror in someone's face, and Ryouga's curiosity
was quite piqued. After all, making Saotome's life hell was supposed to
be *his* job!
------------------------------------------------
"THE WINNER!"
Shampoo posed in her moment of glory, taking the title of Champion for the
second year running!
"aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"
WHAM CRASH! Teeter CRASH! THUD!
"Meow meow meow meow MEOW mew meow!"
"Ranma, you (puff) get (huff) back here!"
Shampoo woozily got out of the crater she'd made when she'd been run
over and noticed that there had been some changes made in the Village. The
bathing center over there had a new entryway. The challenge log had apparently been
knocked loose and it had run over a half dozen warriors. There was also a trail of
flattened amazons that led from the village gate, over herself, and to the bathhouse.
"Shampoo," Cologne said from her staff. "An outsider male has just defeated
you. What are you going to do?"
"Was he cute?" Shampoo asked, still a little woozy. "What?! No way! I
wasn't ready for it. That can't possibly count. Let's see him try that again!"
"aaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHAAHHAAAAAAA!!"
WHAM THUDTHWACKCRASHBAMCRUNCH
"Meow meow meow meow meow hiss spit meow meow MEOW!"
"Pardon me, miss, I didn't see you, oops, sorry. Gomenasai. Ranma!
you come back here and apologize to these women!"
Cologne picked herself off the ground, and watched dozens of other
amazons doing the same. "Lilac! If an outsider male defeats an amazon, she
must give the kiss of marriage and marry him. What does it say when two outsider
men defeat a large number of amazons and run away?"
Lilac adjusted her glasses and checked the Big Book Of Amazon Law.
"Hmmm, let see. Case of Cola Vs Kohi. Hmmm. Also see reference: Case of Jam Vs Jelly.
I see. Well, there's two things. The first girls to catch him get to keep him.
And in the case of simultaneous or near simultaneous, they have to share him.
So that means whoever finds their husband before everybody else gets first dibs on him."
There was a brief moment of silence as the crowd
absorbed this interesting little tidbit.
"WO DA AIREN! WO AI NI!" The cry erupted from a hundred
throats as a large number of husband-hungry amazons joined the chase.
The sad thing was, this would turn out to be the
*least* of Ranma's problems in the near future.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Genma was learning about one of the drawbacks of being a cat firsthand.
Dogs. BIG dogs. With *lots* of sharp teeth.
And they looked *very* hungry.
Divine Retribution can be a real bitch.
~~~~~~~~~
Panting from sheer exhaustion, Ranma finally stopped
running and collapsed onto the ground. He'd finally
managed to lose the c-c-ca-ca-ca... furry thing that he
was afrai-er..just couldn't stand to be near.
Some vague surrealistic memories of his race
from the monster that had replaced his father
popped into his head. There had been those
strange pale looking women talking in Chinese,
a weird zombie with an electric guitar fighting
with some lady wearing bat wings and not much else,
and some big guy with an even bigger sword accompanied
by a little girl.
Ranma shook his head and managed a nervous
cough, he *must* have imagined it all.
After a few minutes the tired martial artist
felt strong enough to take a good look around.
His heart sank as he took in his unfamiliar surroundings.
"Where on Earth am I now?!"
~~~~~~~~~
Ryoga looked around all of a sudden.
He had a strange feeling that he needed to see a lawyer.
In hindsight, he really shouldn't have
picked that particular moment to stop.
Dowel, Sponge, Lye, and the rest of the larger
boned Amazons in the unmarried 25 years+ age
bracket all dogpiled on their new husband.
Peace among them only lasted until they
delivered their Kisses of Marriage.
Almost immediately an argument over who had
first claim to the wedding night started up
among them.
If Ryoga had been conscious at that moment
he would have blamed Ranma for this too.
~~~~~~~~~
-Nerima
Several unrelated events took
place almost simultaneously.
A freak gale of wind blew apart the Tendo Dojo.
Fortunately only Akane and Soun Tendo were in
there at the time so nobody of any real importance
was hurt.
Several bolts of lightning hit the roof of the
Kuno mansion and caused a fire that was quickly
put out, but not before revealing a large and
rather disturbing collection of perverted
photographs hidden beneath Tatewaki Kuno's
bedroom floor.
Happosai managed to blast his way out of his
rocky tomb a few weeks ahead of schedule.
Unfortunately for the perverted martial arts master,
the bombs he'd used turned out to be just a *wee*
bit too powerful. It would take him another month
to dig his way out of the rubble.
And Mikado of the Golden Pair was run over by a semi.
Several times.
Very not so tragic story.
-to be continued...(?)