A/N: I really love this AU. Next up I think I'll write more about Ino and Kiba, or maybe about Neji. Please read my story Once Upon a Time Does Not Even Begin to Cover It cause the events in it are referenced a lot and you won't understand it if you don't read the SasuSaku oneshot first.
This is a NaruHina oneshot. I really like this pairing because Naruto is actually very affectionate and that's something Hinata could use more of, and Naruto just really needs someone who cares for him so strongly. In this AU fic there's a lot more focused on what Naruto gives to the relationship than what Hinata gives, but even though I didn't put it in words, Hinata's the one who takes care of Naruto when he's sick and she generally just devotes herself to him.
Writing Naruto is fun. I liked having him make mistakes and be a general idiot.
Warning: Language, innuendo, mentions of alcohol, etc... Akatsuki are fun to write when they're drunk. I think I went overboard, but I wanted to show how their intoxicated and/or hungover state sort of reflects their character or parodies it, and I think it's to the point where they are acting unrealistically. Poor Nagato got picked on by me a lot. And he hasn't even had a single line! Poor Nagato...
Other characters abused are the Hyuugas: Hiashi, Hanabi, and Neji; Fugaku and Mikoto (very briefly). Neji and Hanabi get some redemption, sort of. Oh, some of the Akatsuki, Team Seven, and Hinata suffer hangovers. And Sasuke suffers at the hands of drunken Sakura and Naruto.
The story of one Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze, who just so happens to be yours truly, is an epic tale of love and trials... no, really, stop laughing! Ugh, don't believe me? Fine. We'll start at the beginning then, and you'll see just what I'm talking about.
I mean, I could totally sell the movie rights.
The beginning of my story starts when my long-lost godfather and his wife, Tsunade, caught sight of me making off with some poor guy's wallet at a Sound Four concert (There are more than four people in that band, so what's up with the name?). Jiraiya and Tsunade were horrified to see the beloved son of Minato and Kushina -with my looks, my parentage was no question- living on the streets, or something. I didn't tell them that I had only been on the streets for a month after I ran away from the last foster home I'd been with.
Yeah, I'm one of those kids who ended up in the system. And all because of some idiot paper-pusher that wrote down the wrong surname. I'd been living as Naruto Uzumaki for years while my godfather was looking for Naruto Namikaze. Talk about bad luck.
Anyway, so Tsunade and Jiraiya took me home. Amidst the stories of my parents -whose names I didn't even know until that day- and hugs where my face was pressed into a huge (And I mean huge!) chest, I managed to miss the part where they were my sort-of legal guardians.
Basically, I assumed I was getting kidnapped. By a pimp and his whore girlfriend. And I wasted no time in saying so.
Confusion settled to rest and ice pack applied to my godfather's family jewels (I do not get kidnapped without putting up a fight, dammit.) I managed to sit still long enough to hear the whole story. Legal stuff was taken care of and I moved in with my new guardians, just in time to be sent to middle school where I met the first object of my affections.
Sakura Haruno was a beautiful girl with brains and a sweet temperament... when someone wasn't making her mad, that is. I loved to watch her when she was completely absorbed in whatever she was doing because she would smile just so and it made my heart skip a beat.
Sadly, my feelings were not returned. Instead, Sakura only seemed to be irritated by my persistent quest for her heart. Tough, right?
Then we attended high school where she met Rock Lee, who made me look tame in comparison. Her best friend, Ino, began fighting with Sakura and she started to hang out with me in favor of Ino-pig. There was also the small matter of my standing up for those picked on by the older seniors and impressing upon her my sense of honor (Not to mention how impressive is it that I usually won against guys much older and bigger than me?).
It was during one of those times when I stood up for a bullied student that I met the angel I now dedicate my life too. She was a poor little rich girl, continually told how much of a disappointment she was at home. For years school had been her escape, until she came to high school and endured her older cousin's bullying.
At the time she was just another student, admittedly a pretty cute one, that was suffering as the scapegoat of an older student. I didn't hesitate to tackle Neji and start pounding him the second I saw him shove Hinata on the stairs. She escaped with a broken wrist, Neji and I were punished for fighting and Neji for bullying another student, and I exchanged glares with the Hyuuga every time we passed in the halls. I never caught him bullying Hinata again, and she slipped from my mind.
Sakura went to community college and got a job at a strip mall called Akatsuki Plaza. Because of Ino attending a different college, their fights tended to happen less and less, though they were often bigger. We were very close because of the fact that I could spend time with her thanks to my flexible schedule.
I did not attend college, but took a few online courses. Mostly I just used my natural talent at grammar and writing to edit my godfather's series of books that those who hadn't read them referred to as porn. In reality, they actually did have well-written plots and the characters were believable and well-loved. Though Jiraiya didn't hesitate to write a few... explicit scenes, the majority of the books were, in fact, humorous and realistic bits of the slice-of-life genre. The few that were set in a fantasy setting usually parodied the typical romance stories and fairy tales while providing a clever way for my godfather to comment on controversial issues like bigotry and politics while hiding his barbs with different names and situations.
While working at the clothing store, Sakura met Hinata, who had recently been disowned and was living with a sympathetic friend of the family, Kurenai Yuhi. Hinata was as shy as ever and Kurenai, unfortunately, was very passionately in love with her boyfriend (Asuma Sarutobi, son of the mayor) and didn't realize that the walls of her apartment were paper-thin...
In an effort to save Hinata from walking in or overhearing embarrassing scenes, Sakura started hanging out with her. Because I was so often in Sakura's company, I also began spending time with Hinata. Imagine my surprise the first time I caught sight of Sakura's new friend!
Hinata's hair had grown long and silky, she'd been introduced to the wonder of correctly-fitting yet modest clothes by Konan, and her smile was really something that struck me. I mean, here was this beautiful girl that has me holding breath, and what does she do when she sees me? She smiles at me and blushes like I'm the most amazing thing ever. I swear I almost fell over.
Looking back, I wouldn't be surprised if Sakura was trying to set us up...
"So, uh, I'm going to head home," said Sakura, standing up and stretching. I didn't look up from where I was staring at Hinata intently across the Chutes N' Ladders board.
"I'll drive Hinata home after we finish this game," I said.
"Thank you, Naruto," said Hinata in a half-whisper voice.
"No problem!" I said, "Hey, I'm kinda hungry. Mind if we stop at Ichiraku's?"
When I looked up the grin Sakura was sending a flushed Hinata completely mystified me.
"That's fine," said Hinata, quietly. Just a few seconds ago she'd been laughing with us over my terrible luck at the stupid game. Her sudden shyness confused me but I opted to pay it no mind.
After all, I was getting some ramen. And I'd get to spend some time alone with Hinata. Who was just about the most incredible person I'd met. She'd endured so much at the hands of her so-called family, survived a kidnapping attempt, and was trying to continue on with her life despite the fact that she couldn't even afford rent for her own apartment yet. She hadn't given up or given the satisfaction to her father of begging for help, yet she didn't hold a grudge against those who wronged her, either. And despite the fact that she didn't exactly have an easy life, her heart went out to those who had it worse than her so easily. Yes, this girl was someone that I was beyond happy I'd met.
The question was: did she feel the same way?
I suppose it must have been painfully obvious. I know for a fact that Jiraiya was upset that even after I'd read his books and even edited a few of them that I didn't pick up on the signs. Tsunade placed a bet on how long it would take me to realize, which she unavoidably lost. Honestly, between Tsunade's gambling, Jiraiya's perviness, and their love for sake it's surprising that I turned out to be the upstanding citizen I am.
Upstanding citizen or not, it didn't change the fact that I really had no clue that Hinata returned every feeling I'd ever had for her tenfold until she glanced towards me when I pulled over next to the sidewalk by Kurenai's apartment.
Alright, so, I know most other guys would have picked up on it from her shyness around me and her blushing and a thousand other things. But for me it was seeing her looking into my eyes and feeling like I was flying, that I realized she wouldn't object if I were to kiss her.
Yes, yes, I know that it was very bold and everything. All I had to go by was the slight widening of her eyes when our gaze connected to go on. But somehow, I knew she felt the same way. And so I proceeded in true Uzumaki fashion (Forget the Namikazes, their nice and all, but they think way too much. How are you supposed to get anything done if you spend all your time thinking about whether or not it's a good decision?) and kissed her.
Wasn't it a surprise for Kurenai when she walked in on her roommate lip-locked with a strange blond guy on her couch?
The fact that Hinata's family had treated her so horribly never sat right in my stomach. But I'd promised Hinata I wouldn't do anything to her father. She'd neglected to think of her cousin, though, and if I ever caught him treating Hinata a fraction of how he had in school they would have to fly to each continent to collect each body part and his head would be keeping the fish company in the Indian Ocean.
While Jiraiya and Tsunade went from Brazil to France and sent an email explaining they planned to be gone for at least three years more, and Sasuke and Sakura were looking at apartments together, it hit me that if Hinata moved in with me, then she wouldn't have to worry about Kurenai and Asuma -whether they were walking in on us or she was walking in on them. Because of Hinata's status with her family, I really hadn't been expecting to open my door one day and find a sober high school student that strongly resembled Neji staring up at me with determination written on her face.
"Uh, hi," I said, awkwardly.
"You must be the Namikaze boy my sister is... involved with," said the girl. Sister? Ah, she must be Hanabi.
"Er, yeah, I'm dating Hinata," I said, and moved to let her into the apartment. She walked in, then turned to face me with a glare that held me where I stood.
"I heard you asked her to move in with you."
"How'd you hear about that?" I cried. I hadn't told anyone that except for Sasuke and Sakura... through a Facebook status update... and my profile wasn't private. Oops. I really hadn't thought anyone except Sasuke and Sakura would notice.
"If you hurt her, I will castrate you so thoroughly it will hurt to even think about sex," said Hanabi. I gulped.
"Isn't that a little harsh?" I asked.
Hanabi proceeded to fill me in on her idea of harsh. Hinata found me curled up on the floor in the fetal position, utterly terrified of what Hanabi had promised she would do to me if I so much as forgot to buy Hinata flowers on her birthday.
"I love Sakura so much, man, she's like this... this happiness," Sasuke slurred, waving his hands around to illustrate his words, "I just smile and stuff when I'm around her, ya'know?"
I nodded, because to my drunken mind that made perfect sense. "I gotcha. Hinata's, like, the best thing that ever happened to me. She's like this amazing person that somehow fell in love with me, of all people. I should thank her for that," I said.
"Dude," chuckled Hidan, hiccuping mid-word, "Naruto and Sas-kay are totally sloshed. They're talking about their fuckin' feelings."
"Obviously they aren't the only ones," said Yahiko, snide as ever when he was even slightly drunk. When the rest of were laughing madly he was picking fights with Itachi, who merely gave him an amused glance. Once he'd switched to picking on Nagato, who burst into tears. He was an extremely sensitive (Woe to those who so much as mention his puppy that died when he was kid!) drunk and we all learned to just let him lie on the couch or the backseat and stare sadly into space.
Hinata, Sakura, and Konan were all very giggly. Something was itching at the back of my intoxicated mind about how last time I'd walked past and overheard a part of their conversation that seemed to involve comparisons over which type of underwear their boyfriends wore (Yahiko and I wear boxers, and Sasuke those boxer-briefs hybrids, in case you were wondering... which you totally were, you pervert.). Disturbing to say the least.
While you could hardly tell the difference between drunk Hidan and sober Hidan, and the same with Itachi, the rest of us all drastically changed. Konan became very bold and loud, Hinata tended to lost her inhibitions gradually and usually ended up dragging me off to a closet somewhere to the amusement of everyone else, and Sakura could not lie. Yahiko became nasty and sarcastic while Nagato often turned into a waterworks. Kisame would decide that random property destruction was a fantastic idea, my self esteem started to drop the more I drunk and I once apologized to a bartender for dirtying up his mugs, and Sasuke would sit down and spout off crap about his feelings.
"You know, my parents are assholes. At first they don't even realize they have a second son until your brother decides that college is for losers. Then they're all touchy-feely until they find out you're gay and then it's all 'don't bring him back here again'," said Sasuke. I nodded, until a slow realization crept over my mind.
"Wait... but you're dating Sakura! You bastard! I can't believe you would cheat on her!" sadly, my brain cells also desert me in my time of need. This is the fifth time I started to beat Sasuke up when he said something that my drunken, dumb self found offensive.
"Naruto..." I looked up to see Hinata staring at me with a look in her eyes I've come to associate with closets. "Stop fighting and come make lo-"
"Sasuke! You cheated on me with some guy?" screamed Sakura.
Yes, my brain cells are not the only ones to go. Poor Sasuke looked heartbroken.
"I don't know..." he moaned, "Everyone keeps saying that and all I remember is telling my parents I'm gay."
"Naruto! Come here right now!" I happily abandoned my friend (Who was currently being pummeled by Sakura, whose temper only worsens after a few drinks) in favor of following my lovely girlfriend.
We passed Itachi who was openly amused at Sasuke's situation and ignoring the devastated Nagato sitting next to him on the couch (He really takes break-ups hard in that condition and turned into a sobbing mess when someone decided watching The Notebook was a good idea).
The last thing I remember is passing Kisame (Maniacally grinning as he dashed down the hall with the fire extinguisher in hand.) before Hinata pulled me into the dark closet.
Waking up with a hangover, covered in fire extinguisher foamy crap and sunflower seeds, holding my girlfriend who was wearing Sakura's clothes, in a bed that was not my own and also occupied by Itachi is not my idea of a good Monday.
Itachi looked over at me, face expressionless as always. He was sitting up and reading a book that I identified as one of Jiraiya's more serious tales and looked unaffected by the amount of alcohol he'd consumed. Which wasn't a lot, especially compared to the rest of us.
"Good morning," he said.
"Lies..." I moaned. Itachi chuckled and the sound made me cringe, but my ears were not done being abused.
"Shoot! I'm going to be late for class and these aren't even my friggin' clothes!" yelled Sakura. She has this amazing ability to drink as much as she wants and wake up with a teeny, tiny hangover that doesn't effect her at all. I mean, I never throw up or anything (Unlike Kisame... poor guy!) but she doesn't even act like she had a single drink the next morning!
"Shut up before I castrate you," I threatened. Sakura paused.
"Is that even possible?" she asked. I sat up so I could see her. She was wearing Hinata's clothes and standing in the doorway of what I was guessing was Konan and Yahiko's room. Which meant that was their bed I was sitting on.
Just then Hidan stomped into the room.
"What a fucking night," he began, "Kisame's asleep on the roof... apparently we had a hell of a water gun fight up there. Yahiko and Konan are fucking half-dressed on the kitchen table. Speaking of, has anyone seen Sasuke?"
I frowned. Why did I remember driving with a tied-up Sasuke in the backseat and an angry Sakura on the passenger side? And leaving him on a doorstep, ringing the bell, and driving away?
"Crap," said Sakura, staring straight at me. I nodded, slowly, horror creeping over me.
"This is not good," I agreed.
"Okay, who the hell's phone is this and why was it in my pocket?" Yahiko burst into the room, angrily waving around a ringing phone that was not helping my headache.
I did, however, recognize the slim purple cell just as Itachi said, "That would be Hinata's."
We all looked at Hianta, who was still snuggled up to me, sleeping peacefully.
"Just give it to me," I sighed, and Yahiko tossed me the phone. I glanced at the caller ID and frowned. "Why would Neji be calling her?"
Sasuke... strange house... driving away...
"Aw, crap! Hidan, you answer it!" I said, and tossed the offending phone at the silver-haired man.
"What the fuck you want so fucking early in the fucking morning?" Hidan said as he answered the phone. I collapsed back onto the pillow and sighed, stroking Hinata's silky hair as I tried to think of a way to get out of this mess.
"Alright, so, we got upset because we all thought Sasuke was cheating on Sakura with another guy, correct?" I asked the room. Everyone (Besides Nagato and Hinata who were fast asleep.) nodded, and I tried to ignore the fact that Konan was half-dressed and Kisame was suspiciously the only one not covered in some sort of fire extinguisher crap (Besides Sakura but she totally took a shower so it's not like that counts!).
"And then Sakura and I drove off and came back without him?"
"I think I was the only other person not passed out by then," said Itachi.
"Why does everyone except Itachi, Sakura, Hinata and I drink so much?" I asked.
"Shut up," moaned Konan, giving me the finger.
"Whatever. So Sakura and I dumped Sasuke on Hinata's bastard of a cousin's doorstep and left." This time only Sakura nodded. Everyone else (Besides Itachi, of course.) was either shocked or grinning, like Kisame and Hidan.
"That guy was such a damn prick," said Hidan. He'd spent about five minutes talking (More like screaming!) to Neji and apparently the guy hadn't made that great an impression. "Does he have a stick up his ass or what?"
"Most likely," I said, rubbing my aching head. Sakura was sitting there the entire time looking both guilty and worried.
"So... are you going to go get Sasuke back?" asked Yahiko. After Konan finished vomiting into the toilet he'd attempted to make breakfast and sent her right back again. Kisame, after spending twice as long puking as Konan, seemed to be as affected as Hidan. Which wasn't a lot. Everyone but Hinata, Sasuke, Yahiko and Konan was so hangover-resilient it was ridiculous.
Hinata, Sasuke, and Yahiko acted normally while Konan tended not to remember a lot of what happened while she was drunk... more than the rest of us. Nagato? He just usually remained unconscious for a long time and woke up with most of the alcohol having worked its way through his system.
"Of course!" I said, loud enough to make myself and most everyone else wince. "Right after breakfast," I moaned.
I hesitated, but pressed on the doorbell. Sakura stood by my side, looking anxious, and so obviously guilty that Neji would immediately be able to tell why we were there. How he'd even known to call Hinata was beyond me, seeing as she hadn't been along with us when we dumped Sasuke at this guy's apartment.
While Hinata and I didn't attend college and so were living in apartment by default, and Sakura lived with her parents before she moved in with Sasuke, apparently jerks from rich families are above living in dorms like normal college kids. Neji and Sasuke both lived in these perfectly painted and landscaped complexes. It really wouldn't surprise me to find the guy dressed like Sasuke and eating a perfectly healthy lunch.
We really had no plan to get Sasuke, but fear of what Neji's asshole-ery would do to him made us ready to run over... after we had a delicious breakfast of pain relievers and lots of coffee. And Kisame and Hidan actually ran over to get breakfast at McDonald's, actually being able to stomach food (She would have joined them, but Sakura couldn't eat out of worry. She'd also given up on getting to class on time and was more concerned with Sasuke to attend at all.). Then we'd grabbed a still-sleeping Hinata and tossed her in the backseat, just in case, and drove out to Neji's apartment.
He answered the door dressed in a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up and khakis. I grinned at my correct guess and stepped in the door before he could slam it in my face.
"Hey, Neji!" I said cheerfully, folding my arms behind my head. He stared coolly at me, completely ignoring Sakura, before turning away and leading me through his house. He didn't even bother to check if we were following.
"I presume you are here about the drunken Uchiha," he said.
"Uh, yeah... sorry about that. I don't know what we were thinking," said Sakura.
"We were drunk," I reminded her, only to be elbow-jabbed in the gut for my efforts. I glared at her and was about to ask her why she was being violent all of a sudden when Neji cut off my thoughts.
"I don't care. Just get him out of my house," snapped Neji.
"How did you know to call Hinata?" I asked.
"The Uchiha, amidst his constant bewailings about his mistake of cheating on his girlfriend with a pink-haired boy, mentioned that I resembled Hinata. I assumed that in order to know that he must have met her and as I couldn't get any names out of him regarding who left him at my door, I decided calling her would be a good idea."
"Sasuke's an idiot. Hinata's much cuter than you," I said as Neji stopped at a door and pushed it open to reveal Sasuke sitting on the side of the tub in Neji's bathroom, looking forlorn and depressed.
"Sasuke!" cried Sakura, running over to him, "I'm so sorry! I-"
"Sakura," said Sasuke, pushing her aside. She stared up at him, biting her lip in worry. "I am about to become violently ill."
Have I mentioned that I love Sasuke when he's hungover? That is, when he isn't extracting revenge for whatever mess I got him into while we were drunk.
I closed the door on Sakura murmuring apologies and patting Sasuke's shoulder while he reminded her that it was also his fault for managing to forget that Satoru had actually been Sakura between throwing up. When he's hungover, the slightest movement can make him run to the toilet. Although he never seems to have that problem when he's beating me up..
Glancing over at a not-amused Neji, I noticed the dark circles under his eyes.
"Hey, why do you look so tired? Did Sasuke keep you up all night with his whining?" I asked jokingly. Neji just stared at me, murder in his eyes.
"Actually, he did," he said.
"Oh..." Now I sort of felt bad for leaving Sasuke there. Poor Neji. Sasuke will really go on and on and on and on about whatever issues he's having and it's really quite amusing when it's not happening to you.
At least Nagato wasn't there. He and Sasuke together were like torture.
"Hinata!" asked Neji.
"Oh, shoot, she's awake already?" I cried, running over to the door. I thought it was a Fed-Ex guy or something when the doorbell rang!
"Naruto, why are we at Neji's apartment?" asked Hinata, "What's this white stuff in my hair? And why am I wearing Sakura's clothes?"
"Um, so Sakura, Sasuke, and I all thought that he was cheating on Sakura with a guy named Satoru... yes, I know, we're all idiots. So, I'm pretty sure that Sakura beat Sasuke up if that black eye is anything to go on and apparently we thought it would be a great idea to dump Sasuke on Neji's door... I'm guessing we got the address from you. Well, we sort of forgot about it until Neji called your phone and so we drove out here and I brought you along just in case. Don't ask me what for, it seemed like a good idea at the time."
She nodded while Neji looked constipated, which I guess is his version of confused.
"Uh, the white stuff is fire extinguisher foam... Kisame sort of sprayed everyone with that last night. And as for why your wearing Sakura's clothes and she's wearing your's... I don't know but I bet Itachi does," I finished. Hinata nodded in acceptance while Neji's eyes looked like they were about to bug out their sockets.
"This doesn't even compare to Hidan's last birthday party," I whispered to Neji, patting him on the shoulder. He made a croaking sound, turned around, and left.
"Naruto," complained Hinata. She really doesn't like me picking on her family members (Can't even insult Neji, even when he's not there! Even though he totally deserves it!), but I can't help it.
"I'm sorry. I just hate everyone who ever did you wrong, even that jerk that cut in front of you in line at the store yesterday," I said. Hinata smiled, lifted her hand, and traced the scars on my cheek (Well... let's just say that my first week on the streets was painful.). I caught her fingers and kissed her. In her bastard of a cousin's doorway.
I heard a very fake cough from behind me, pulled away, and smiled at Hinata before I turned to face Neji. I didn't let go of her hand.
He looked extremely pained (Why does he have such issues expressing things with his face?) as he stared at the two of us. Surprisingly, it was Hinata that broke the silence.
"Neji, I love you, my cousin, but I'm afraid that I love Naruto more. I believe you gave up the right to have any objections to our relationship a long time ago."
I gaped at my beautiful, brave girlfriend as she stood up -gently, but firmly- to this man who had once made her life miserable in a way that was only matched by her own father. Really, I didn't think I could admire her anymore, but I found that I certainly could.
"Hinata, I-" Neji choked out. It was then I realized that that pained expression was regret, and I found myself determined to make things right between Hinata and Neji, because she deserved to have family. If she could still love him, then I could certainly forgive him.
"Neji, you've been an asshole for a long time, and Hinata told me about how your father died, so I can at least understand why. What you really need to realize is that the only one you can blame his death on is those kidnappers. Hinata didn't asked to be kidnapped, and she is only alive by your father's sacrifice. Do you honestly think your father would like to see you spit on the reason he died? She doesn't deserve to have you hating her for something that isn't her fault... and even though I really don't want to say this, because Hiashi totally deserves to be hated for whatever the hell people want to hate him for... it wasn't his fault, either. Hate him for being the bastard that he is, but your father's murder is the fault of those kidnappers."
Now Hinata was gaping at me. I smiled reassuringly before continuing with, "Hinata still cares for you, and she's forgiven you long ago. If you are willing to stop being such a prick and act like family should, I can forgive you, too."
Neji's hand groped out and found a chair that he proceeded to lean into. I desperately tried not to show my shock at him letting us see that sign of weakness as Hinata's grip on my hand tightened.
"Thank you. I... apologize. I have known for a long time now that my father's death lay with his murderers, and that Hinata was as much a victim at the hand of her father as I, but..." he shrugged his shoulders slightly, and it dawned on me that he was just a broken man. "it is easier to ignore the truth than act on it."
Hinata released my hand as she ran to her cousin and embraced him. Her shoulder shook as she silently cried, and I knew that they were tears of a bittersweet combination of regret for Neji's sad past and joy for their reconciliation. It was only when Neji looked up, and I saw his pale eyes filled with tears, that I also crossed the room and added my own arms to the hug.
Our group-hug was interrupted by the arrival of Sasuke and Sakura.
"What the hell?" asked Sasuke, "Why is it that Naruto is always hugging everyone?"
I looked straight at him and grinned, not releasing Neji (Who stiffened when he heard Sasuke speak.) or Hinata from my embrace. Sakura patted Sasuke consolingly on the arm.
"You'll get used to it," she said.
Hinata moved in with me, and to my horror I found out that Hanabi's threats were nothing compared to Neji. This time Hinata came home to me dry-heaving over the toilet. She said nothing but next time I saw Neji he made sure to stay out of arm's reach of Hinata. Have I mentioned how much I love my girlfriend?
Now that we were living together, I found that Hinata had a horrible problem in the morning (It takes her about an hour or so to fully wake up.) where she would forget things on her way to work. It was one such morning when she realized she was late that she dashed out the door with only one shoe strapped on and lost the other on the steps. Laughing, I bent down to pick it up, and placed it on her foot.
"A perfect fit," I teased. Hinata blushed, thanked me, and gave me a quick kiss before she took off so she wouldn't miss her bus.
The neighbors were treated to an odd mix of laughter and profanity as it was as I returned to my door and remembered that I'd forgotten the keys inside and the doors were self locking that I also happened to realize that according to the popular story that reminded me of Hinata and I, Sakura was our Fairy Godmother.
A/N: Please review! Below is some more on the AU. (Which is based on American towns. I think I forgot to mention that before.) So if you don't really care feel free to skip it.
I forgot to add what Team Taka would be in this AU! Juugo would also work at a wildlife preserve along with Shikaku and Shikamaru. Karin and Suigetsu... well, I have plans for them at Akatsuki Plaza. I, uh, sort of forgot someone else and I don't remember them now either. Poor character. Oh! Maybe it was Sai? Well, the whole ROOT thing is a Secret Agent Bureau and if I introduce Sai it will be through Sasuke because Sasuke will be doing something involving work that will bring Sai into his life.
As for the Sand Sibs? Suna will basically be Las Vegas. Casinos and all. Gaara and his sibs are the children of the mayor, who Orochimaru accidentally kills during a Sound Four rehearsal -the mayor was there early getting a good seat- by pressing the wrong button (Kabuto: Dammit, Orochimaru-sama! How many times do I have to tell you to leave the soundboard to the people who actually know what they're doing? Do you have any idea how bad a life-sentence for murder will be for your publicity? Wait, actually, do you think you could re-enact that while Sakon films it?) and electrocuting him. Temari flies airplanes, cause fans are friggin' stupid. Kankuro is a woodworker because puppets are beyond stupid. Gaara is a troubled teen with a lot of issues, thought to be mentally ill. But when their dad dies and they get thrown into the system (no living relatives), and Gaara starts reacting violently they band together and leave Suna, foster homes, and their formerly-rich-lifestyle for the streets of Konoha where Naruto finds them and offers them a home in his and Hinata's apartment (Jiraiya: Naruto! Why is there burn marks on the couch? Who is this redhead that tried to slit my throat when I walked in the door? Why is there a bunk bed in the living room? What happened to my TV! I go away for a year and a half and this is what happens?)
Oh, if Suna is Las Vegas, Konoha is just an average town bordering on city status. You know, a few skyscrapers but nothing like NYC. Ame is Seattle, I guess. Uzushio would be a tiny small town, Kiri is like some coastal town that's big with the tourists. Oto is a sort-of big town known for its dedication to the arts. Iwa is a mining town. Kumo is a very beautiful city built by a waterfall and known for its architecture. And now I officially planned this AU way too much.
Thank you for reading and please review!