Title: In Which You Can Leave Your Tie On
Authors: noneedofcrepe and lookit'saprongs
Rating: PG
Word-count: 300
Authors' note: Inspired by the events of this morning, when lookitsaprongs discovered she is a nerd and can't undress herself for bed properly, and noneedofcrepe decided they should write about it.

It had been one of the most exhausting nights the Marauders had ever known. Pranks, drinks, scantily-clad women and numerous near-death experiences. The boys shlepped into the darkness of their dormitory; eyes unfocused, limbs jelly-like, articles of clothing on the wrong body parts... All they wanted in that moment in time was to crawl into bed and sleep for ten years.

With aching bodies they began to undress themselves. And to Marauders undressing doesn't so much mean carefully unbuttoning their clothes, stripping them off then folding them neatly beside the bed. To Marauders, undressing means violently wriggling out of the everyday restraints of fabric with complete and total disregard for buttons and zips. Peter fell onto his mattress with half of his trousers still clinging to his body, while James went to bed with nothing on at all (aside from the glitter and torn bowler hat).

When the four of them finally lay under the warm comfort of their bed sheets, their sore bodies screamed with heavenly joy. Sirius thought he said, in a slow, tentative drawl as not to disturb the peace, That. Was the best night… Ever., but in actuality what came out was, "Gnuneh." It wasn't long (two seconds) afterwards that all four of them were sound asleep and snoring low in their throats. Remus's nose wheezed delicately.

Noon broke the next day. The light was too bright and the birds too many. They refused to open their eyes or even move at all. Ten minutes passed before anything happened.

"Lads," Remus gurgled through morning haze and breath, "I fell asleep with my tie on."

Peter might have attempted to chuckle, but all that was heard was a puff of air from under his covers.

"Lads," Remus tried again, "it's still tied."

"Oh, Remus," Sirius groaned. "Nerd."

Fin.