A/N: okay guys, I posted this at Cinescape too so don't attack me for plagiarism! Please review cause it'll make me feel good!

Life, Love, and Little Green Men, according to the Marauders

Chapter 1: Pointy, Pointy, Pointy…

Disclaimer: I didn't make up the Marauders or Lily or Hogwarts or the Magical World so yeah…

"Miss Evans! Miss Evans! Did you hear what I just said?"

"No," said a ruby haired, emerald-eyed beauty. "Sorry Professor, I didn't."

"Obviously she wasn't paying attention. What do you prescribe, doctor?" James

Potter yelled across the room to his best friend, Sirius Black.

"Hmm…that Evans sure is a tough one. But I think a kiss from Peter would do it,"

Sirius replied.

Lily Evans stuck her tongue out at them both.

"Now behave yourself Miss Evans," Remus Lupin called from yet another corner of

the room, "or I might just have to take points from Gryffindor."

People laughed at one prefect fighting the other.

"True, Miss Evans," Professor Bode, the Ancient Runes teacher, said, "You do not

need to act as if you are five years old." The boys sniggered loudly. "Oh, you three

too. You're fifteen, and it's almost the end of the year. Please try to act mature." He

sighed. "Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to seat you four separately. Instead of

biting and hair pulling, now I have constant class disruptions because you yell across

the room."

"Oh just be glad Starr isn't in here," Lily said, referring to Sirius' twin sister.

"Yep. That'd be bad…Oh my God! Did I just agree with Evans?" James asked.

Then the bell rang.

"Oh, sorry Prof," Remus said, getting up. "Look at that. No time for homework. Darn!"

"Yep. Better give us extra next class!" Sirius called, running out.

"Sirius," Lily said, walking down to dinner with them. "You realize that by this time in

the year, he could give us a year's amount of homework in one night?"

"Yeah, but if we fight again—which I know we will cause we always do—we'll stall and

escape it again."

"You know old Bode. He's the most easygoing teacher we have."

"Mm Hmmm," Lily said, stepping into the Great Hall.

Lily went to sit by her friends and the boys theirs. Unfortunately, they were across

from each other.

Lily and the others hated it, but it wasn't up to them.

Lily was best friends with Sirius' twin, who insisted she "loved him to pieces and

couldn't stand a day without sitting by him." So their normal seating arrangement

was this: James sat by Sirius who sat by Starr (his sister) who sat by Lily on one

side. On the other sat Jenna (one of Lily and Starr's friends) who sat across from

Lily, Alli (another one of Lily, Starr, and Jenna's friends) who was next to Jenna and

across from Starr, Remus, then Peter Pettigrew.

"So how was your last class?" Jenna asked.

"Fun," Sirius replied.

"Yeah," James finished. "We got out of homework again."

"AGAIN?!?" Starr blew up. "That new bat Trelawney gave us loads!"

"Hey, it's your fault you took—" insert snort here "—Advanced Divination anyway,"

Remus commented.

"Yeah, well it's an easy class. Just make up a bunch of crap. And it *can* be

useful…"

"Really," said Alli, "How was I ever supposed to know I was supposed to grow an extra

head by last September?"

~*~

The rest of their fifth year at Hogwarts passed quickly with O.W.L.s and whatnot.

But of course, the last day of school was Sirius and Starr's birthday.

The lovely day (for the rest of them) started off at 12:01 am with Sirius flipping on

the lights, and opening the other guys' curtains.

"I'm 16!" He yelled, pounding down the stairs.

He stood on a circular table in the common room singing "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!"

Almost immediately, Starr joined him.

Soon, the other fifth year boys had filtered in, looking dead, slumping over chairs and

couches.

"Where are your homies A, L, and J?" Sirius asked his sister.

"I had enough sense not to get them up with me so I didn't get beaten when they

were fully awake."

"Damn…good point. Good ni—morning!" And he skipped off.

Sure enough, five minutes later, shrieks of terror could be heard from all around the

castle.

Starr looked satisfied and went to sleep.

~*~

The next morning, Peter woke up to a knock on the dormitory door.

"What?" He asked grouchily.

"Ouch," Lily said, faking hurt. "Sorry, I was just wondering if you'd like to purchase a

finely hand-crafted wristwatch. They're only $99.99 plus shipping and handling plus

tax."

"Lily! I got up at midnight last night! You come and ask me if I want a watch? NO!"

He started to close the door.

"WAIT!" Lily shouted.

"What?" He asked, starting to get irritated.

"I wasn't serious, I just wanted to know if you guys wanted to join us for the usual

present opening ritual."

"PRESENTS?" Sirius said, jumping out of bed.

"Yeah, it's your birthday…"

"I am so there!"

"Me too! I have presents for you both!" James said, getting up too.

"How *do* you guys still have energy? You got *no* sleep last night!" Peter

complained.

"Maybe you should try hanging out with us on weekends. You'll learn our secrets…"

"I'd rather not. I like making it to class on Mondays, thank you."

"Whatever Pete, Buddy. You can go to sleep if you want. You just have no idea what

you're missing out on."

They paraded down to the common room.

"Happy birthday Stella Annelise!" Sirius called.

"WHAT have I told you about calling me by my full name Sirius?"

"…Not to call you that? But what about special brother privileges?"

"More like special mental case privileges. And that only allows you to call me that

when it's not a week day, not Sunday, when we aren't in public, when it's before noon,

and after 11:30!"

"So…I'm only allowed to call you by your REAL name on Saturdays between 11:30

and noon?"

"When we aren't in public."

"Oh sorry—that's stupid!"

"Hey! You're the one that came up with my nickname. Use it!"

"Sorry 'Starr Almighty.' Happy birthday anyway."

He hugged her and they did their 'secret handshake.'

"Okay…It's time to start the holiday'l (A/N: Kind of like annual, just—every holiday?)

Present Opening Ritual," James announced. "It's my turn to be master of tribal

dancing this time, so let's get started."

Lily, Alli, Remus, Jenna, and James assembled themselves in a circle around the

birthday kids, and started doing a little skippy dance thing around them, chanting,

"Go Black twins, it's your birthday, we're gonna party like it's your birthday, we're gonna sip bacardi like it's your birthday and you know we don't give a FOOT that it's

your birthday!"

As they continued to chant, James spoke.

"And the first present of Starr's new life as a sixteen year old is opened…"

"Crap Lily," Alli whispered, "you forgot the charms."

"Oh, right," Lily replied, flicking her wand.

Everyone else jumped as different colored flames sprung up behind them, and vines

and trees and leaves were formed from the pictures and notices on the walls.

Ten minutes later, all the presents were opened, and Sirius left.

"Hey, where did Sirius go?" Starr asked.

"He said something about going off to play with his toys…" Lily told her.

"Great, me too. Look! I got scissors! Pointy! Pointy! Pointy! Pointy…" she wandered

off.

"Oh great, I'm scared. Will someone go watch out for whoever gets in her way?"

Remus left and came back within minutes.

"Where did you find her?" Lily asked.

"On the floor with scissors in her hand. She was poking herself with the tips and

saying, 'pointy, pointy, pointy'…" He looked very confused.

Just then Peter came down, dragging Sirius with him.

He also looked very confused.

"He was sitting on the floor with scissors."

"Was he saying, 'pointy, pointy, pointy'?" Remus asked.

"Yeah…I'm confused."

"That makes two of us."

Yay, that's the first chapter! I know it's kinda short but hey, they'll get longer! I hope you liked it! Please Review!