Chapter 1:
Wherein Lann and Evie travel back in time and both immediately
finds themselves in a predicament
Lann wished he wore a condom on his head because today he has been severely mindfucked.
No, it wasn't from falling through the poorly made time portal Evie created. (Although it was quite nauseating)
No, it wasn't from the immediate impact of hitting solid ground with his face after exiting said time portal. (They always said he had a thick head)
No, it wasn't from the fact that he was now a good decades in the past in some forest that he didn't recognize. (Okay, maybe that might contribute)
It was from the fact that before him stood a younger version of Fiona who was wielding a bow.
A bow.
And she had a really smug (and really unbefitting) look on her face and Lann could tell she was thinking, wow, head shot.
Which lead Lann to the conclusion that Fiona was 100% responsible for the arrow protruding from Marrec's helmet.
(Long story short, Lann was borrowing Marrec's helmet. In case you were wondering, it involved Gallagher, a ginormous spider, a fishing rod, and a 5 dozen bottles of toad's blood.)
Lann found this situation to be bad on three levels.
1. Lann was wearing very very light armour, practically skin tight leather pants.
2. This young Fiona was gorgeous. The older one had this beautiful aloofness to her but seemed unapproachable while the younger one was exuberating a certain air of confidence.
3. His boner was probably showing.
Oh and it's also probably worth mentioning that Lann had travelled back in time to try and follow Fiona (See: Stalk) to witness her past first hand, and he and Evie both agreed that it would probably be catastrophic if they interfered with the flow of time.
As soon as Lann was hurled out of the portal, before he even managed to hit the ground an arrow had lodged itself into his (Marrec's) helmet. If it wasn't for Marrec's helmet Lann would have been dead and he heard that being dead isn't very fun.
As Fiona approached him, Lann noticed her left arm was loosely wrapped in bandages.
Peculiar.
"Who are you" Fiona's countenance was the same stoicness that Lann was accustomed to, but even 10 years younger she still bad this way of making him shit his pants.
"My name is Laaaaaaaaaathita. My name is Lethita."
Lann mentally punched himself as Fiona glared at him. He knew it. His cover was blown. He could see it in her eyes, he could see it in her soul. She knew it. She was opening her mouth and Lann just knew she was going to call him out on his trickery.
And then.
"Oh that's a cool name," She said as she broke out into a grin. "Hey, sorry about shooting that arrow in your head. Thought you were a fomor or something."
Oh my goddess that was more words Lann had ever heard Fiona say in a lifetime.
"Nah, it's fine. Wow Fiona, I never thought you could use a bow."
Oops. Did he just – oh gods, they hadn't even introduced themselves yet. He definitely blew his cover.
Fiona scowled. "Is it because I'm a woman? Now I really wish I shot you- wait, who's Fiona?"
Confusion. "You're Fiona?... "
The totally and most certainly Fiona shook her head vigorously.
"I'm not Fiona. My name is-"
A sound interrupts.
Judging by that snarl, the owner isn't friendly.
From seemingly out of nowhere, a wolf emerged and lunged at the two. It was a monstrous thing and had a hungry look in its eyes. But before Lann could grasp the handle of his swords the beast was upon him and the it had enough strength to tear through his armour and leaving quite the gash. Claws meet flesh, and Lann is sure he is going to meet his demise.
However.
There is a thunk and a whimper. The weight of the wolf is gone.
Through shell-shocked eyes Lann could see Fiona facing off against the wolf. Her bow lay on the ground next to Lann and she seemed to be using one of Lann's own swords. The wolf swiped its claw at her but she was ready. In a motion all too familiar to Lann, Fiona raised her left arm in an attempt to block the attack. But the move lacked the shield, and the wolf's claws ripped through her bandages leaving several red lines behind. Then in one fluid motion Fiona countered and lunged forward, her blow struck the wolf straight and true. It howled in pain and fell to the ground. Without missing a beat, Fiona pierced through the beasts' skull with her sword, making a sickening squelch. All doubts have disappeared, and no matter what this girl said Lann knew for sure that this was Fiona.
Within seconds gentle hands wandered about his chest. It was a tedious process but Fiona eventually managed to remove his chest plate and chain mail. He gasped as he felt added pressure to his wound.
"Are you okay?" Fiona questioned.
Lann looked himself over. He deduced that the wound wasn't that deep, and Fiona had promptly wrapped bandages around his torso. He thought he would have been fine, but as he tried to pull himself up he felt the full pain of it all.
So many things were speeding through Lanns mind. Like, Ow this really hurts. And wow this Fiona can use a sword and a bow but wait she isn't even Fiona apparently. And the most prominent thought in his brain was Evie when I find you I am going to kill you.
All these thoughts skittering through Lann's head left him with the only comprehensible response he could muster.
"I hate my life."
Fiona laughed, she laughed, and if Lann wasn't so beat up he would savour the moment. She laughed and said, "Don't worry, I'll let you rest at the place I'm staying. I'm sure my partner wont mind."
The not Fiona then hooked Lann's sword back on to his belt and carefully lifted Lann's helmet whilst ignoring his whimpers of protest. Great, now she knew what he looked like.
Wait, wait, wait. Flash back (or rather flash forward) to the first time Lann met Fiona. He distinctly remembered her asking him if they had met before. Does this mean that he-
"You're kind of a cutie, you know?" She said as she tied her bow and his (Marrec's) helmet to her belt.
Lann blushed, but grunted as Fiona lifted him to his feet. She wiggled herself underneath Lann's arm so that she could support his weight.
"Keep talking to me, okay Lethita? Don't want you passing out before we get there. "
Lann made some sort of noncommittal noise and then slightly whined as the two started to slowly trudge through the forest.
"Alright, where are you from Lethita?"
"I.. I'm from far."
Lann wasn't really lying.10 years from the future is pretty far.
"Far, huh? Then what are you doing all the way over here?"
"I don't really know."
Also wasn't a lie. It was all Evie's fault. All of it.
"Got any lady friends?"
Lann thought of the Fiona from his time and suddenly felt really uncomfortable.
"Uhh, there's this woman I kinda like."
"Huh. Too bad." Lann couldn't see her face, but could hear the disappointment edging in her voice.
There was a silence, until the not Fiona began to muse to herself, probably to fill the quiet.
"Fiona, huh? That's a pretty nice name. Not mine, but definitely nice. Maybe I should just change my name to Fiona."
Lann grimaced, remembering changing his own name. He was momentarily left to his own thoughts, as they slowly shuffled over the roots and rocks on the forest floor. Sunbeams escaped from the sky and littered patches all around the two.
Then it hit Lann. A plan. A great plan. A plan so great that Lann should just change his name to Plann.
"Hey, I'm feeling a bit out of it and it hurts to talk. Can I ask you some questions? It'll help me focus."
The woman carrying him nodded.
"Alright. Ask me anything."
"Where are you from?"
"Far. South from here. My village was burned down by goddess knows what, but somehow I made it out. Lost everything though."
Lann could loosely remember his own past. It was nothing glorious, and he had lost everything as well.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. It happens. Life happens. And it was ten years ago. I wasn't the only survivor. I made a friend."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. He's my family now and I can't imagine life without him."
Lann could hear the change of inflexion. The softness of her voice. A kindness, a totally different Fiona.
This Fiona was so different. So vibrant, so alive. She claimed not to be Fiona, but her swordsman ship that Lann saw earlier definitely affirmed that it was Fiona. What could possibly have changed her so drastically?
"What's his name?"
She hesitated, and Lann felt like she didn't want to reveal any information about her friend, as if she were trying to protect him.
"Kay. His name is Kay."
She spoke it softly, and fondly. This Kay must be a lucky guy.
"Is he a fighter like you?"
She scoffed. "Of course. It's a horrible world out there and it's a necessity, knowing how to fight. He didn't at first, but I taught him how to use a bow. He's really good at it now."
"Oh yeah. You've got some good aim with a bow and you can use a sword, but you don't carry one with you. Why don't you ever use a shield too?"
Fiona laughed. It was light, and soothing. What happened to you, Fiona?
"Having a shield is way too heavy and limits my mobility. Kay is really good with a bow – not as good as me, mind you- but I can always count on him to have my back. And the sword?" She smiled as if remembering some sort of inside joke. "I normally carry it with me but it needs sharpening and Kay lost a bet."
She seemed to get lost in the moment and allowed a silence to envelope the two. After snapping out of her reverie, she gave Lann a light nudge.
"Lethita?"
"Still here. Kind of out of it."
"Hello," she said softly, somewhat trying to fill the silence.
"Hello," he replied.
"How are you?"
"Not too bad. Not too good either."
Their conversation continued on like that. Just snippets of words, an occasional chuckle, but mostly short worded replies. Soft voices and light smiles. A foreign gentleness. And as Lann began to lose his consciousness he just couldn't help but wonder -
What happened to Fiona?
Evie was in quite the daze.
No it wasn't from travelling through the time dimension portal that she kinda wasn't sure that it was going to work. (But let's be honest, Evie is perfect and it could never go wrong)
No it wasn't from landing in the middle of the street. (But she landed on top of someone so it wasn't that bad)
No it wasn't because she was now ten years in the past. (That was already beyond comprehension)
It was because the person she landed one was unmistakeably Kai.
When she landed she found herself on top of, and face to face with Kai. Really, for a short few seconds she had thought the plan was a failure and that she just teleported herself instead of time travelled but it was the very little things. Kai's face was less gaunt and his hair was just a teensy bit longer. Plus he also had this absolute look of confusion –which would be normal when one day you walk outside and hey look it's raining people- but this was Kai, and his facial expression never changes. Happy? Sad? Angry? Confused? It's all one look.
Evie had basically pinned Kai down with her weight and if things went wrong she could have impaled herself on the sword he was holding.
That's when Evie thought wait. He was holding a sword. There was no bow in sight. Just a sword. A really weird sword, now that she thought about it – like she had seen it before. With its jagged teeth like edge, it wasn't really a sword but more like a key.
Oh this was so awesome.
Not only was Evie's time portal a success but she also managed to find (land on) Kai!
(A slight set back, really. The goal was Fiona but Kai is good too)
After getting over the initial shock of seeing Kai, Evie quickly got to her feet and brushed off some dirt from her clothing. Thankfully there weren't many people around to witness her appearing out of nowhere, save for a group of really weird and possibly drunk people in the corner. "Sorry about that!" Evie said in a sing song voice. She extended a hand to help Kai up.
Kai shook his head and stood up on his own. "No problem. "
Evie broke out into a grin. "It's not everyday that a young and beautiful woman falls on you"
Kai raised an eyebrow. "You'd be surprised."
Not knowing what to say, Evie motioned toward the sword in Kai's hand.
"Nice sword," She commented, noticing the unique jagged teeth. It kind of looked familiar for some reason.
"It's not mine" Evie rolled her eyes.
She thought they were different, but this Kai was more or less the same as the one from her time.
Eugh.
"My name is Evy." Evy was the name she came up with, for when she ran into Fiona. It kinda sounded like Evie, but it was pronounced Ev-y. Oh boy, was she clever.
Kai raised an eyebrow.
"I'm Kay."
The two stood there for an awkward few seconds as several thoughts paced through Evie's mind.
Kay? Not Kai? What the heck, this guy looks exactly like Kai, but he says he's Kay? There's no way, Kay's got to be an alias. Or maybe, Kai is the alias? Eugggh
Then, Realizing she probably screwed up the past enough and wondering how this would have an effect on the future, Evie decided she should probably leave. She should probably go look for Lann, he couldn't be too far off.
"Nice meeting you," she said as she turned to leave.
Suddenly there was a pressure on her arm and she turned to see that Kai was holding her back.
"Forgot this" he said almost inaudibly as he handed her staff to her.
"Oh wow. Yup that's kind of important." Evie kind of needed it to travel back to the present.
She made to leave again but after a few minutes her arm was grabbed again.
"What did I forget-"
There was no Kai in sight.
One of the shady looking people hanging around from earlier latched on to her arm while the rest of them surrounded her.
"You're a pretty girl." He grinned and drew her close enough so that Evie could smell the stench of alcohol.
"You drunk bastards!" she screamed as she tried to pull herself free.
One thug grabbed her and pinned her arms to the side while the other placed his hand over her mouth. "Were not drunk," one of them said with a wide grin. He was pale and nasty and was the total definition of the word lech. "Well at least not all of us."
Evie's eyes widened as he drew out some kind of potion from his pocket. It was green in colour and seemed to have a few herbs floating in it and Evie knew from all the potions that Lann ingested that green was a bad sign.
Someone yanked her hair back and another wrenched open her jaw. The pale guy uncorked the potion and poured the contents down her throat. Evie tried to spit it out but to no avail. As soon as the bottle was empty the other thugs let go. The effects were immediate. Her limbs weren't responding and she along with her staff dropped to the ground. She felt herself being dragged from the middle of the street to all the way behind the blacksmith shop and mentally cursed as one of the other thugs picked up her staff.
"A pretty girl falling from the sky. I wonder how much she's worth on the market."
They were slave traders or one of those guilds that just pillage and sell people. She only heard rumours of such guilds in the past but she never realized things were this severe. This was so unlucky. They were probably going to trade her off to someone. These type of things don't happen to her, they're supposed to happen to Lann!
"Probably worth more if she's a virgin." Another said.
"How would you know if she is one?"
"Let's check."
Evie internally screamed as their grimy and cold hands touched the smooth of her skin. They reached the hem of her dress and then-
There was a shout of pain and the hands were gone, followed by bouts of shouting. From her position on the floor Evie couldn't see anything but concluded someone had come to save her.
"Shit, he stole my sword! He's got two swords now!" one of them shouted.
Maybe it was Lann. Finally, he's good for something other than being fodder. As soon as this paralysis wore off she'd apologize for calling him useless.
"... He doesn't know how to use them."
That was definitely Lann.
There was the sound of something metallic skidding across the ground and then a curse.
"He's unarmed!"
Then something heavy hitting the ground. And a sickening squelch followed by a loud squeal.
"He fucking cut off my arm!"
A resolute voice cut through the chaos. "Looks like you're the one unarmed."
Oh gods. Oh wow. That horrible joke was Lann worthy.
"Here have your sword back!" Her hero shouted. "I don't even use swords!"
The sound of something being flung and then-
A scream.
Several feet thundered away followed by someone shouting, "My eye! My damn eye!"
As Evie listened to the footsteps fade away she heard one set approach her. Gentle arms lifted her up and kept her secure. From Evie's peripheral vision she could see her rescuer's face. And of course, her brave heroic and daring prince charming was...
Lann.
...
...
Just kidding, it was Kai.
"I'll take you to the Inn I'm staying at. My friend won't mind." he muttered. Evie nodded and meant to say thank you, but it came out more like hrggggggggggggggggggggggggggh.
She just hoped that Lann didn't do anything too stupid.