They are everywhere, everywhere, Raoul bashers galore!
In fanfics they smash him, the dashing hero, deplored
What has he done to deserve this abuse?
The grammar-less phanfic, written like Dr. Suess?
He did win Christine, he won fair and square
He was permitted, for God's sake, in the scene in the Lair!
Sure, write all you want about Erik's personal hell
Write about him, his childhood as well
But please, pray tell, what has Raoul done?
He is not alcoholic, and he's sure not a bum
But then, that's the work of Phantom of Manhattan
Forsyth took Raoul out, and instead put a rat in
The aforementioned protagonist, now bashed and scathed
Now Andrew Lloyd Webber, with whom phans have lost faith
Takes this monstrosity, destroys not only Raoul
But Erik and Christine, in a manner most foul
So don't bother bashing, for Lloyd Webber here
Is already destroying our character dear.