Author: Heaven's Flying Fish
Summary: Remus has never been much of a potion brewer: just how bad is he? Slughorn suggests he takes on an extra assignment for extra credit and gets handed 'Exploding Fluid'. It's a simple potion, only 15 steps, but Remus has been having a bad day … and is beginning to wish he hadn't pretended he knew what he was doing … [vague LilyRemus
A/N: This is one of three entries into the 'Tales of Whiskey and Regret Challenge' on LJ Community: The Red and the Wolf.
The prompts I chose were 'Pretended', 'Exploding Fluid' and Bad Moon Rising lyrics by Creedence Clearwater Revival.
o:o:o
I see trouble on the way
I see earthquakes and lightnin'
I see bad times today
- Bad Moon Rising, by Creedence Clearwater Revival
"Honestly, Remus, just let me," Lily insisted, edging towards the table. "You've been having a funny time all day – getting into accidents and the like."
"What? No I haven't. And no, Lily, I have to do this myself. It isn't going to impress Slughorn if he questions me about my potion and all I can say is, 'Erm, sorry, sir. But about that …'" Remus trailed off, and, grabbing Lily by the shoulders, he steered her back onto the bench.
It was Thursday night, the middle of April, and Remus was attempting to finish off the potion that had been assigned to him by Professor Slughorn.
"Now, Mr. Lupin," Slughorn said, waddling up to his desk. "Your last marks have…" Here Slughorn paused, and his moustache twitched, side-to-side, as he thought of a delicate way in which to voice his concerns about the large 'D's scrawled on the labels of his student's last few samples. "They have left a little to be desired, one could say. Now, now," the professor chuckled, watching Remus's cheeks flush brightly, Sirius poking him in the side with his spoon before going back to stir their cauldron. "No need to be embarrassed. But what say you to doing a little extra credit work to," with a chuckle, "bring yourself up to speed, hmm?" "Yes, sir," said Remus, nervously running a hand through his streaky brown hair. He offered a coy smile as the older wizard leant over, buttons straining, to place a book over the top of Remus's text book. Sirius slid the guide out from underneath, absentmindedly twirling his wand at a sprig of rosemary, making it shred and drop into the bubbling potion, turning it an alarming shade of black. Sirius's eyes bulged and, coughing at the thick plume of rancid smoke steadily rising, threw a handful of Bertie Botts' Every Flavour Beans out of his pocket and into the liquid. Raising his eyebrows in surprise, Sirius made a self-satisfied noise as the potion turned green and solidified. "Mr. Black, maybe you would like to have a look over here as well?" Professor Slughorn said with a walrus-y grin, gesturing at the book. "Nah, professor, I'll just get Lily to fix it. Never you mind me, carry on." Sirius flitted a charming smile at his professor before trotting over to the red headed girl and enthusiastically describing his latest dilemma. The professor cleared his throat and returned to Remus. "Cheeky boy … where were we? Ah, that's right. I'll give you until April 14th, so a month from now, to get this done. "Alright, Professor," said Remus. "I'll get started on it as soon as everything allows." His smile was a little strained this time and Slughorn drew his eye down Remus's lightening hair to the little tired creases about his eyes. "Hm. Yes, you do that, Mr. Lupin." With an awkward cough, Horace Slughorn tottered away, sticking his nose into Snape's potion as he passed and praising him loudly. Sirius, in the meantime had returned and was sorting through his remaining jellybeans. "What are you looking for?" "Lemon," Sirius grunted as he concentrated on his task. He pulled out a light yellow bean. "What do you reckon? Lemony enough?" "I don't know, those beans are awful fickle –" But Sirius had already thrown the little sweet onto the surface of their potion. With a puff of light, the potion turned into a thin, clear blue liquid as was described in the text book. "That girl's a genius!" Sirius exclaimed, pouring the leftover beans back into his pocket.
And that was precisely why Lily was tentatively supervising Remus's potion-brewing just after dinner in an empty dungeon classroom.
"I don't have any idea how on earth you managed to get into 6th level Potions, Remus, you're utterly hopeless."
"Yes, well, I managed to scrape an A last year and Slughorn let me in. But, if I don't get this Fluid done properly, then I think he'll be asking me to 'take a break' from Potions for a while. Everyone knows that he's getting embarrassed by me – three benches in the last term! I always forget how acidic Murkwart is." Remus leant over the book Slughorn had given him, squinting at the name of one of the ingredients.
"Yes," said Lily, putting her hand on his to stop him from pouring a cup of Murkwart into his cauldron, "you do tend to forget about that, don't you?" She picked up the jar of pickled roots and placed it gently in the supply cupboard. "Listen. Please just let me help you. I don't want you failing out of a course, Remus." Lily widened her green eyes, pleading with him.
A sudden surge of confidence over-whelmed him and Remus shook his shaggy hair, a lopsided smile and quirked eyebrow overtaking his expression. "Come on, Lily. Slughorn said it would be easy, and it's only fifteen steps. Look, it says here: A Simple Exploding Fluid, no problem, right? I can't possibly get things too wrong."
Lily sighed, slumping back against their bench as she shook off her uneasy feeling. "Fine. But if anything looks drastic, I'll step in … no matter what you say, Mr. Lupin."
Remus grinned and scanned through the book. He collected the ingredients he needed, carefully avoiding the jar of pickled Murkwart. After arranging them in the proper order, Remus began to prepare them.
A neat third of an hour had passed, and all the ingredients were happily simmering in his pot, except for one: garlic. The garlic itself wasn't the problem; the issue Remus found himself with was the fact that it had to be sliced with a silver knife.
This was a quandary in which Remus Lupin often found himself in Potions. Silver was pure, far cheaper than gold, and a relatively accessible metal, thus very useful in the sterile preparations necessary for Potion-making. Remus began to sweat; if he stopped now, Lily would ask questions. If he didn't stop, however, then it would hurt. A lot.
The surge of confidence overcame him once more, just as Lily asked, "Are you alright, Remus? Need help?"
"No! I'm perfectly fine," Remus said, even as he winced, gripping the shining handle of the silver knife he retrieved gently from the cupboard. He lined the tip of the knife up with the clove of garlic and, hand shaking, quickly drew the knife backwards and forwards through the herb.
"Careful!" cried Lily, alarmed at the speed at which he was slicing. "You'll slice your hand off at that rate!"
Remus slowed a little, quickly fitting the second clove under his blade as he continued. As bad as it was holding the knife, having it come in direct contact with his blood would be potentially catastrophic; he doubted Lily would know what to do with a werewolf with silver poisoning.
As the fourth clove went under the knife, Remus felt his skin blister around the handle of the winking tool. Remus bit his lip, and with a tremble, finished off the last of the slicing. Calmly putting the knife down as he wiped his forehead on his robe-sleeve, Remus checked the time and after counting – one, two, three, four, five, six, seven – he threw the final ingredient into the solution.
He heaved a breath, eyes darting between his hand and a distracted Lily who was no longer watching him: she now leaned rather curiously over his potion, watching the colour turn slowly darker and the consistency thicken. With a quick glance, he assessed the damage incurred from the knife. Three large burn blisters had spread over his palm and a large, throbbing welt was deeply burned into the tip of his index finger. Despite it being the fault of his lycanthropy that he had the burns, he silently blessed the large pain threshold he had built up through years of agonising transformations and post-moon healings.
He leant over his potion next to Lily, as he groped around in the cupboard for a vial of water in which to soak his hand. "See," he said smugly, watching as a bloom of dark red billowed beneath the surface of the liquid. "I told you I knew what I was doing."
Ah, even better, Remus thought, as he spied a jar of Murtlap Essence on the top shelf, out of the corner of his eye. Silently unscrewing the lid with his left hand, Remus shoved his hand deep into the jar.
A peculiar tingling sensation overtook his hand before, with a silent cry of agony, Remus yanked his hand out of the jar of pickled Murkwart he had mistaken for Murtlap Essence. The acid picked away at his skin, burning, burning.
Lily, still immersed in her observation of her friend's potion didn't notice him silently keening to his twitching hand.
"Yes, I'm quite surprised, Remus – this potion is near perfect! A couple of minutes and you'll be out of here!" She shot him a smile as he hurriedly hid his hand behind his back, tears welling up in agony as the acidic Murkwart fizzled at his blisters.
"Ha, ha, yes, well, you know. I'm not just a pretty face," Remus chuckled tensely.
Lily laughed. "I don't know," she said. "If you don't get over here soon, your solution might be ruined. You're getting close on time." She gesticulated vaguely at the clock hanging by the blackboard.
"You're right," Remus wheezed, clutching his hand tightly behind his back. "Say," he exclaimed. He grabbed the book off the bench with his left hand. "Why don't you go and get Professor Slughorn, now. I mean, it's due in tomorrow anyway; he might as well see that I'm making it, ha, ha," Remus finished weakly with a light smile.
Lily's face lit up. "Of course! What a marvellous idea. I'll go get him; you prepare the sample."
Once Lily had waltzed from the room, Remus almost screamed in relief, dashing to the supply cupboard and wrenching out the real jar of Murtlap Essence and a bottle of distilled water. "Hahhhh," Remus gasped, pouring the water into a bowl and immersing his hand in it. "Finally!"
Once all traces of the Murkwart were gone, Remus emptied out the water and refilled the bowl with Murtlap. He stuck his hand in it before wandering over to his cauldron, blowing the flame out from underneath it.
"Exploding Fluid is a fascinating substance Miss Evans, quite right! Yes, though it is a little simple for a girl of your talents; now, I hope you weren't assisting Mr. Lupin – it is his extra credit, after all!"
"Oh, no, Professor, though I admit I did offer –"
"Cheeky girl!"
"Remus refused. He said that he had to do it on his own; that he couldn't have any help!"
"Oho! What a good boy, then!"
Remus's eyes went wide as he heard Lily and Slughorn meandering down the corridor. They flitted feverishly between the bowl of Murtlap Essence, the door and his potion.
The door opened and Remus hastily shoved the bowl of Murtlap behind his cauldron. "Ha, ha! Professor! Didn't expect you back so quickly!"
"What's the matter, Mr. Lupin? Miss Evans informed me that your potion was superb!" Slughorn's moustache twitched from left to right as he surveyed the room. His eyes landed on the lacking jar of Murtlap Essence, and his face pinked a little as he turned back to Remus. "What on earth are you doing with Murtlap, Mr. Lupin?"
"Oh, ha, ha, that? Well, there was a little mishap with the knife, you see –"
"The knife! Remus! What have you done?" Lily asked, her eyes bright with worry as she advanced.
"Nothing!" Remus shrieked, leaping backwards, clasping his hands tightly behind his back.
Lily stopped, staring at him in shock. Slughorn ogled confusedly. Remus blinked owlishly from the corner of the dungeons.
And then, as though tasting the tension on the air, Remus's Exploding Fluid detonated.
"Oh … bother …" murmured Remus faintly from the corner as a large volume of sluggish liquid rocketed to the roof. A good half hours' work blew upwards into a mushroom cloud before showering back down again in a fantastical display of liquid-y fireworks.
Then, just as suddenly as it began, the tidal flow stopped and the rumbling whooshing was replaced by a quiet dripping as Remus's term project leaked from every cranny and surface of the room.
Professor Slughorn's moustache, dripping wet and sodden with red solution quirked upwards at both ends, and Remus stared as the furry object seemed to grin at him. And then it began to talk. "Excellent work, Mr. Lupin! I have never seen an Exploding Fluid react so enthusiastically in all my living days! Oho! An O for this one, Remus, oh, yes indeed – simply delightful! Ha, ha, ha," Slughorn laughed, before turning on his heel and waddling out of the room. "Oh," he called back, "don't forget to clean up, now, will you, children?"
Silence permeated the room, broken only by the steady trickling of potion to the stone floors. Lily began to laugh. She made her way over to Remus.
"It hasn't been your night tonight, has it?" she giggled, wiping his oozing fringe back away from his face. "And I don't really mind," she said, nuzzling her face into the neck of his squelching robes. "It's kind of cute, really; a little bit lucky, I think." She raised her potion stained face to his and their lips met and a sweet kiss. Lily wrapped her arms about him and Remus did the same around her. His hand grazed the material of her robes and he suddenly shoved her away, clutching at his arm.
"Ow," he whispered, hugging his hand to himself. "Damn, I'm getting the regretful feeling that I shouldn't have pretended that I knew what I was doing before. I've, er, got to go, Lily; see Madame Pomfrey for my hand."
Lily looked uncertain as he dashed towards the door. "Uh, shall I see you later then?" Lily asked, blushing a little bit.
"Oh, yes, definitely!" Remus said bolting back to give her a quick peck on the cheek. The other cheek. Her forehead. Lily wrenched him down and they shared a longer kiss, soggy though it remained. "Right, er, got to go. Sorry."
And Remus belted from the room, trailing thick red potion and leaving Lily behind.
Lily chuckled to herself as she waved her wand, making the room sparkling clean once more. "I'm beginning to get a regretful feeling about pretending I didn't notice his tribal knife dance. I did say I'd step in, but …" She giggled quietly, biting her lip as she remembered Remus's hurried kisses. Lily emptied out the bowl of Murtlap Essence. "Maybe it wasn't such a bad day for him, after all."