The things that come out of depressing playlists and bad days: My best one-shot, acording to LLK, yet. ::Cough:: Maybe not a one-shot. ::Cough::

Beta:LLK

Special Thanks: Kaye and Julie, you helped me so much, even when I got stuck. LLK, I don't know what I'd do with out your help.

Give It All Up

It was the day of his funeral. The day she never saw coming. The day she never wanted to come. But Catherine Willows had no choice in the matter. Warrick Brown had gone beyond the limits that come with being a criminalist. He had gone looking, and what he had found was incredulous. Unfortunately it had cost him his life, something not one of the CSI grave yard shift would ever be able to endure. Not many could see it, but the strawberry blonde coworker of the decedent took his death harder than any other.

Catherine couldn't take her crying eyes off of the closed casket in front of her. The flowers draped over it sent a slight, insignificant smell to her nose. All she wanted was to see him again, not in his current state, but how she remembered him; laughing and talking the night away at the diner. But now that feeling of bliss was gone forever; never to be felt again.

The sound of a small infant sounded through the church, but she was the only one to turn and look. Catherine now starred at the woman holding Warrick's son; a woman she barely knew, yet despised so much. For a brief moment, the two locked eyes, but Catherine was quick to turn back around. And in that brief moment, she missed the other woman's look of helplessness. She couldn't stand to look at the person who had torn her from her best friend. If only he knew he was more than that to me, she found herself thinking and more tears rolled down, dragging most of her makeup along with it.

While Grissom began his eulogy, Catherine noticed the change in atmosphere. It seemed to her, as words of death not taking him away were sounded, that Warrick was in the room, sitting right next to his son, starring a hole into the back of her head. She turned around again, her hopes had risen, but he was not there. Her mind took control again, but in her heart she could feel the empty loneliness setting in.

Instantly, as soon as she felt Greg's hand touch her shoulder and the sobs had begun, Catherine was glad she made her daughter stay home. There was no way she wanted Lindsey to see her mother in her current state. She needed to be strong for her, for all of her coworkers. They all looked up to her, even Grissom in some ways. She couldn't let them down. Catherine slowed her breathing as best she could and cringed away from the comforting hands. She ignored the concerned voices until she heard ones not meant for her ears.

She listened carefully, straining her ears to the back of the church, to the whispered disapproval from a family member of Warrick's ex-wife. She turned her head just in time to see Tina Brown verbally lash out at the elderly woman next to her before gathering her son and hurrying franticly out the large, oak doors. Catherine turned her attention back to the service, even though she felt herself longing to be near the tiny piece of the man she loved.

With swift movements, Catherine rose from her seat and past her two friends, ending up in the isle. Her body was angled towards the doors, but she turned for one final look at Warrick's casket. She gave up the longing feeling to stay, and gave into the maternal instinct to help the new mother. Catherine hurried out the door, her heels muffled against the carpet. She heard her name being called out by both her superior and subordinates, but chose to ignore them. With one last glance towards the front of the room, she pushed through the doors and out into the hall.

Catherine stopped dead in her tracks. Directly in front of her, Tina sat on a bench with Eli bundled in her arms. For a moment, she didn't want to disturb the duo, until she realized the violent shaking movement in Tina's shoulders. Catherine used the side of her finger to wipe away any stray tears before taking a seat next to the woman.

Despite the reassurance Catherine gave her, Tina's shoulders never stopped shaking. For reasons beyond Catherine's understanding, Tina placed Eli into her arms, then stood on wobbling knees and ran out of sight. Catherine sat on the bench, wide-eyed and confused, holding the boy and watching his mother disappear. She then looked down at the infant, his hands curled up to his chest and tears swimming in his eyes, as if he knew what had just occurred.

After gathering all her courage, she stood up, clutching Eli close. Catherine walked slowly as more tears came as she got closer to the doors. A few of the guests had walked to the long, brown box to say their final good-byes, but when the door closed behind her with a click, they all froze and turned to stare at the woman with the child of her best friend, who was actually so much more.

~
Fin (maybe)
1.27.2009
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