It was a white door. With pink flowers on it. I wouldn't let it go, couldn't leave without it. That door held my sanity. Without it, I could be convinced that none of it was real. It was all just a dream.
So it traveled with me, wherever I went. From hospital, to home. From home to asylum. They said I was crazy. Said it was all in my head… I supposed it would've been easier to say they were right and I had just imagined it all. But the thought of 'admitting' I was crazy just turned my stomach.
Instead I spend my days in asylums, listening to different psychiatrists come and try to convince me it's all in my head. All in the head. I swear they're starting to make me crazy. Soon I'll start hearing voices. Seeing people that aren't there. With all the drugs I'm on, surely one of them will give me hallucinations.
The blindingly white walls of my room keep me from drifting off into a daydream, so I just stare at my door. Waiting for it to open and someone to come through it. Or something. I made them put it in as my closet door. My room is set up like at home, though I have far fewer supplies. Nothing I could use to hurt myself or one of the orderlies.
But I wouldn't hurt my orderly. Sometimes I think he almost believes me. He reminds me of someone I once knew, always so focused on doing his job perfectly. I guess one of the old patients threw a pencil at his eye, now he wears one eye patch. His name is Mike, and that makes me smile.
I shut my eyes, trying to pretend I'm not here. I try to picture myself at home, before it all happened. It doesn't work, all I can see is a few weeks after I came back.
"She keeps babbling on about monsters and someone named Mike. Something about a cat." My mother was whispering to my father in hushed tones, I could hear from the other side of their bedroom door.
"Kitty…" I said quietly, hugging my bear tighter.
"That's what all children do, it's just a phase. It'll pass as she gets older and realizes what isn't real."
I was too young to understand what they were saying then, but I understand it perfectly well now. They think I dreamed up this elaborate story and told it until I even believed it was true. They think I'm crazy.
A strange clicking noise makes my eyes snap open and I look around. I recognize that noise. I'm not sure from where, but I know it. There's a flash of purple on the other side of my room.
"Who's there?" I demand, sitting up. There's more tapping and swishing sound coming towards me. And suddenly I know what the sound is from. I give a swift intake of breath and feel my eyes go wide.
"You!" I hiss. His shape slowly takes form in front of me. A wide mouth, surrounded by purple scales. Two green eyes that pop out more than a bullfrog. Four arms and four legs with the body of a snake.
"N-now hold on there." His words come out in a natural hiss, but he held all four hands up in defense.
"Just hear me out."
"Randall." I whisper.