Disclaimer: I don't own Hannibal.
A/N: I plan to write Hannigram fics down the road, but for now, this will have to do.

Title: Shadow Play
Summary: I see them in my dreams; the girls who look like me. Abigail-centric
Warning(s): dark and scary stuff

Xxxx

I see her there in my dreams—
the latest girl who looks like me.

I see her there with her sisters:
girls who share my hair and eyes
and freckles and face; girls who
could have been me but are nothing more
than pale shadows cast by moonlight.

I see them there.

We sit in a circle for faux-therapy,
and we cry together over the tragedy of our lives,
and we weep about the sex we never had,
the boys we never got to kiss,
the girls we loved but never told;
we cry because our lives were too damn
short and we can't get them back.

I say "we" like I'm included—like
I'm one of these lost girls with their
frilly nightgowns and Betty Boop sweatpants
and flamingo-print tank tops;
I say "we" like I died with them.

I hold onto them and stroke their hair and
gingerly touch their clothes, their bruised throat,
their delicate hands, their gaping wounds that still
bleed when I press against them, and they ask me why.

Over and over,
they ask me why:
why them? why now?
why not later? why not
sooner? why? why? why?

I can't give them an answer.

In my darker dreams,
the shadow-girls scratch at me,
sniff at me like junkies will desperately sniff
at Elmer's Glue in woodshop, and they'll hiss:

There's murderer in your veins;
there's murder in your veins.

And they'll tear me apart, seek the
retribution that they'll never get,
that their families will never get;
they'll drink my blood and
swallow me whole, Cheshire grins
painted red as they sing:

An eye for an eye you silly bitch,
an eye for an eye.

And I want to feel bad,
want to feel guilty, want
to say that I'm ashamed of what
I've done, but even in my dreams,
as I'm crying or dying, I can't help it
but whisper to them in their ears
as they cry against me, their necks
as they swarm me, their mouths as they
bite off my tongue:

I'm sorry
but you tasted so good.