Ahhh. My first day at Pigfarts. I got out of bed, rolled into my clothes then I went to orientation with Prof. Rumbleroar, he's a lion who can talk. This was my year. I will rule the school. Oops! Almost forgot my spacesuits. These Martians will worship me. Oh here I am. Prof. Rumbleroar is giving a boring lecture wait he just said that we will have yearly visits to Hogwarts. Nooooooooo! That jerk Harry Potter goes there. Then again it will give me a chance to get extra diapers. Ooooo time for Transfiguration with Prof. McGonagills, the flying fish.
"Hey its Draco malfoy" said a random martian then they went into a big musical number.
You're Draco Freakin' Malfoy!
You don't understand
you're a legend, man,
to us all!
Every son and daughter-
RON & THE KIDS: [spoken] "SAFE!"
... From You-Know-Who,
all because of you!
You were small,
but I wonder if you can recall...
[CHORUS: Oooo...]
Long story short,
this guy,
[whispered] "Hary potter"
was super cruel...
[spoken] "Harry Potter?"
[GASP!] "SHHH!"
: Oooo...]
... Tried to kill you &the martians,
and this is where it gets intensely cool...
Even though you were a tiny little boy,
you shoulda died but you survived and then destroyed
this evil guy and it's story we enjoy to tell...
You're Draco Freakin' Malfoy!
We don't prefer Gandalf,
Merlin, or Oz,
You're a whole lot hotter!
With that diaper scar,
you're a superstar to us all!
If we're in trouble we know who to call!
You're Draco Freakin' Malfoy!
I wouldn't wince at all,
you're invincible to all harm!
Like betty crocker-
RITA SKEETER & THE KIDS:
[Oooh!]
... I wanna eat you up!
No one'll beat you up
with that charm!
Remember, Draco, kid,
you're the Boss,
you're the King,
you're the Bomb!
But this is all so sad,
I mean, my martian friends
were killed, long ago...
[Long ago they died!]
... I wanna be psyched,
but being unliked
is all I know...
[... All he knows, that's why-]
I never thought I'd be a part of such a fate,
an opportunity 13 years late...
I guess it's time for me step up to the plate
and show 'em that I'm something great!
I'm Draco Freakin' Malfoy!
I'll do what I can
if what you say I am is true!
I can't be bothered
by my awful past,
I've found at last
something I can do,
so it's time I knew
exactly who I am...
I'm Draco Freakin' Malfoy!
You're Draco Freakin' Malfoy!
I'm/You're Draco Freakin' Malfoy -
... And I'm the Man!
[Ahhhhhh]
[spoken] " Draco Freakin' Malfoy!"
THEY LOVE ME !