Title: You're the Only One (Who Never Called Me That)
Author: wildpeace
Ships: Tina/Mike, Brittany/Santana, other canon ships.
Summary: Ten different people, ten different ways of hurting one person's feelings...

A/N: Brittany and Mike are my OTF (One True Friendship), and so when Brittany implied to Artie that everyone in the school had called her stupid, I couldn't help but think 'I can't *believe* Mike would call her stupid! He's way too nice for that!' And I thought about how it might have happened, and then about how the other times would have happened, and thus a fic was born! Big thanks to agoldencharm for taking the time to read this and support my transition into Tike writing. It's very VERY much appreciated!

XxX

I - Mike

Brittany and Mike are both in the fourth grade when he finds her sitting outside their classroom on a too-big grown-up sized chair, swinging her pink jean-clad back and forth beneath her and twirling a piece of hair around her finger. He's just got done with soccer practice and is going back to get his jacket from his peg when he finds her.

" Hey Mike!" she greets with a grin and a finger-wiggle of a wave, pulling her legs up to sit cross-legged, her nine-year-old body small and limber.

It's a good thing he's known her since they were in Kindergarten, because he thinks otherwise he could find Brittany kind of overwhelming. She's always so smiley and loud, and he really isn't either of those things. " Uh, hey Brittany."

" You been at soccer?" she asks, and it's such a Brittany question because the soccer ball is under his arm and he's still wearing his too-big black shorts, but he nods.

" Uh huh." Then curiosity gets the better of him. " What are you still doing here?"

Something happens to Brittany's face then: she tilts her head towards the door and slowly licks her cherry lips, and for a split-second, her smile drops. " Mrs Adams wanted to see my Mom and Dad."

He feels himself freeze at the words – because they all know that when the teacher wants to see your parents on any day except parents' night, it's bad. " What did you do?" He's really surprised, because Brittany is *never* naughty, never mean, never gets in fights. Sure, she has to break them up sometimes, mostly if Santana is involved, but she *never* instigates them. In fact, whenever anyone else is hurtful or unkind, she usually ends up crying.

She shrugs, her braids falling over her shoulders, obscuring the unicorn on the front of her t-shirt. " I got an E in my math test and I told my Mom because I thought it meant Excellent."

" It doesn't," he tells her, probably needlessly, pulling his jacket on over his shoulders. He knows Brittany has never been the cleverest person in the class. She cheats off Santana most of the time, and he let her copy his social studies homework when she came in with just a drawing of a cat. The only time he's seen a teacher praise her was in gym class, and so he's honestly curious when he asks,

" Brit, are you kind of stupid?"

She shrugs again, and through the door they can hear crying. It sounds like her mom.

" Maybe. But my daddy says I'm just a special kind of smart."

Mike thinks about that for a moment. His own dad says he's pretty clever, but then he spends pretty much all his free time studying. Well, when he isn't taking a study-break and sneaking his headphones on to dance around his room. But this strict dedication means he's never gotten less then an A in any test they've taken. " You're failing math?"

She nods. " I don't understand why there are only two numbers for 10 things."

" What?"

" Two numbers - a 1 and a 0. But for ten things. Shouldn't there be 10 numbers?"

It makes odd sense, in a very Brittany way, and her doggedness gives him an idea. He's clutching the soccer ball to his chest and looking down at his toes – because her face is just so earnest and he doesn't want to see her face if she says no – and so his words are half-mumbled when he offers, " I could study with you, if you like. I'm pretty good at math."

In a flash, she's off the chair, her arms winding around him. His soccer ball gets knocked aside and goes rolling across the ground, but neither of them move to get it. Brittany smells like cherry and crayons, and he doesn't even mind that she has yoghurt down her top or that the toes of her red pixie-boots are on his feet.

" Mike! You're so sweet!" She pulls back, a smile shining on her face. " You'd do that for me?"

He can feel a blush creeping up his neck. " Sure."

It's at that moment – with him still tangled up in Brittany's long arms – that the classroom door opens and Mr and Mrs Pierce walk out with their teacher Mrs Adams, and he feels himself flushing red all over again. Mrs Pierce is dabbing at her eyes with a kleenex, and her husband's arm is around her shoulders. Mrs Adams looks a little bit tired and a little bit sad, but does a double-take at the sight of Brittany and Mike together.

Mike expects her parents to be mad at finding him randomly hugging their daughter, but they both look fairly unfazed.

" You ready to go Brittany sweetie?"

She jumps up and down, her hair swinging around her shoulders. " Mom! Dad! Mike said he'll help me with learning my math so I don't have to stay in 4th grade again next year!"

His chin is dipped right down to his chest and he wishes he could crawl into his t-shirt and disappear, because it was one thing to say it to Brittany, but it's totally another to have to say it in front of grown-ups.

" Is this true Mike?"

Mrs Adams is looking at him curiously, because he's never really been one to speak up in class. He usually just sits next to Noah and Finn – friends through years of common history, but without their flair for trouble – and does his work in near-silence.

But he's nodding, shoving his hands deep into his jacket pockets and squirming slightly on the spot. " I'd like to help…if I can."

From that day on, every Thursday evening he meets her after her Street Dance class, and goes through their math with her. And if he starts coming early and catching the end of the lesson, or the middle, or the whole hour, well that's just the price he pays for being diligent.

The day Brittany graduates 4th Grade she finds him in the cloakroom and pushes him against the wall before pressing her lips against his. They're wet and warm and soft against his own. She's wearing a sky-blue dress and is completely ecstatic, and he's in ironed jeans and is completely confused.

" What was that for?" he asks when he finally regains his wits, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

" Because you're a good friend Mike Chang."

XxX

II & III- Puck and Finn

They're fifteen and at a party the first time Mike ever punches anyone.

Mike's a total pacifist. He believes in talking things through and finding alternative solutions to violence. He might be friends with Noah and a member of the football team, but he's never given anyone a wedgie or a slushy facial and *certainly* has never partaken in the famed McKinley High dumpster tosses. It means that sometimes he gets teased and called a 'girl', but he can outrun every guy in the team so mostly they leave him alone. Being that mindlessly, purposefully hurtful just isn't his style.

It's Friday night and he's three drinks down and in the middle of a pizza-slice run to the kitchen when he stumbles upon the conversation. Realising quite quickly that the talk isn't for public consumption, he ducks into the utility room, figuring he'll just wait until they're done, but he can't help himself from listening.

Finn looks a little freaked out, but that's probably because Puck has him pinned against the kitchen counter, poking him hard in the chest with his finger. " Look, dude, we're bros and all, but with the big V-plates still on you you're coming across as a little fag. You're *fifteen*." Grabbing him by the shoulders, he spins Finn around and points into the living room where a whole plethora of football players and Cheerios and other populars are bumping and grinding on each other, buzzed on beer and wine-coolers.

Finn looks as uncomfortable with the conversation as Mike feels, and practically squirms like a puppy. " I don't know if this is a good idea," he hedges, but Puck's face is set.

He points his way through the crowd, his eyes settling on something or someone and lighting up with a frightening look of pleasure. " There she is," he crows, and Mike can't help but follow their gazes.

Brittany is in the middle of the dance floor, already having stripped off her sweater. A red tank top sticks to her sweat-slick skin and her hair swishes around her shoulders as she jumps around with Santana.

Puck's smile is wolfish and dark and makes the hair on the back of Mike's neck stand straight up as he orders Finn. " Go in there, get her, and get *some*. No pussying out."

" What if she says no?" Finn's voice is kind of higher than usual and accompanied by a crooked shrug that Mike thinks is meant to look aloof, but kind of just looks like he's got a weird muscle spasm.

One eyebrow rises on Puck's face, and he crosses his arms over his chest. " Brittany say no? Look dude, here's what I know about the chick. She's majorly stupid and stupidly hot, but no ain't in her vocabulary. Girl is a grade-A slut."

The next thing he knows, Mike's out of his hiding place and standing over Puck, and his hand is *throbbing*.

" What the HELL dude!" Puck yells from the floor, clutching his eye, and Finn is just staring at them, mouth open so wide he looks like a gasping fish.

They don't realise they've caused a scene until Mike looks around and finds the rest of the party crowded in the doorway, staring. He feels a blush rise on his cheeks, but shakes himself. " You shouldn't have called her stupid," is all he says before turning on a heel and leaving the party behind him.

Later, as he lies in bed with a bag of frozen peas on his swollen fingers, his phone buzzes next to him. Picking it up he reads Brittany's name, and when he opens his message folder he reads a simple, single word: 'thankyou'.

XxX

IV - Quinn

It's September of Sophomore year, and the Cheerios are practicing on the field as the football team run laps. The sky is dark and ominous overhead and Mike's running as fast as he can so he can get home before the predicted thunder-and-lighting starts. He watches as the girls flip and bump and high kick, and then get into place for their classic finale - the human pyramid. It's a testimony to their skill and the hours of practice they've put in, and it makes him shudder every time he sees it. Watching hard from across the field - and being careful not to trip over his own feet - he catches sight of Brittany and Santana pulling Quinn up to the top right as the heavens open. Drops of fat rain begin to fall and hit him on the top of the head like bullets of ice, and then there's a deep belch of thunder and the rain is suddenly crashing down in waves and he can barely hear Coach Tanaka calling them from the bleachers, but the others seem to have stopped and be heading towards the locker room, so he slows his running and looks back towards the pyramid.

While Coach Tanaka may have called off the football team because of the rain, it would take more than predicted storm conditions to stop Coach Sylvester. Mike watches as she yells down her megaphone and the Cheerio girls grab at each others' arms and legs and hold fast. Their uniform ponytails are instantly soaked, bangs flattened against foreheads, and Mike's eyes are drawn to Brittany who tries to blow the hair from her face but then gets a mouthful of rainwater for the trouble. She coughs, and Mike sees the pyramid wobble.

From that second, everything else seems to happen in slow motion. Brittany coughs again, and her foot slips from position. She slides sideways, taking out the girl next to her, and then there's a horrific moment where the whole card castle seems to crumple. Cheerios go tumbling across the sodden ground.

Mike's running that way before he even thinks about it, and Coach Sylvester is yelling, and then Quinn is picking herself up from the floor - not even caring about her dirt-streaked uniform or the graze on her cheek - and grabbing Brittany by the arm. She hauls her off the ground, to her feet, ignoring the way the taller girl flinches.

" Are you *stupid*! You could have just killed us!"

Mike's about to intervene when Santana pulls herself up from her place trapped under a Freshman and pushes Quinn by the shoulder. Hard. " You don't talk to her like that," she argues, getting into Quinn's space, ready for a fight, but Brittany grasps her by the wrist.

" Santana, don't," she pleads, pulling her hand gently. " Come on, let's just get inside. Please."

Santana's face is drawn with fury and for a moment she doesn't look like she's going to back down, but finally, after a long pause in which Mike wonders if he can pull her off of Quinn without sustaining serious injury, she relents. Tossing her sodden hair, she narrows her eyes at the Head Cheerleader. " Everyone's noticed you're getting fat. Your days on the top of that pyramid are numbered."

The two girls rush past him on their way inside, and while Mike wants to follow them in and out of the rain, he can't help but keep his eyes on Quinn. She remains where they fell, her face turned up to the sky. Pale hands are pressed against her midriff and she's standing, frozen.

" Quinn!" he yells over the crashing of the rain, and it's as though she didn't even see him there, because she flinches at the sound of her name. He holds out a hand. " You gotta get out of this rain."

For a moment it seems as though she won't move, that she might stay there until the whole of heaven drops upon her. But with one more prompt of her name she reaches out and takes his hand, and follows him inside.

After the longest, most warming shower of his life, Mike leaves the locker room and hopes that his car will start. He's just rounding the corner when he sees them - two blondes, head to head - standing next to Brittany's locker. He worries that the fight is still ongoing - because he and everyone else in the school knows how Quinn can hold a grudge - and so stops to watch.

He doesn't realise he's been holding his breath until he sees Quinn reach up and wrap her arms around Brittany. Though he's at the other end of the hall he can make out her "I'm sorry", and finds himself exhaling in relief.

When he interrupts the two of them he pretends he didn't hear the earlier conversation, and offers them a ride home. The three of them, plus Matt and Santana, tool around in his beat up Honda for hours despite the storm, and when he finally gets home he's exhausted.

He dreams of toppling pyramids and thunder, and Quinn's face as she had stared up at the sky, only then realising he couldn't tell if it was rain or tears running down her cheeks.

XxX

V - Kurt

If the football team and the Cheerios joining the New Directions was the oddest combination of groups, then Mike thought the most unlikely friendship that had come out of it was almost definitely Kurt and Brittany. Mike knew they had worked together on various dance routines - even back as far as the goal-kicking 'Single Ladies' - but it still always made him smile to see the two of them, arm in arm, talking.

The night before the football team had almost won a game by the narrowest margin in months. It wasn't a win, but it was a close as they were likely to get this season, and so most of the guys on the team were feeling rowdy and overly self-important. In the cafeteria, the jocks claim a bank of tables and pull him to sit with them, even though he usually eats his lunch in the library. The fact that he'd taken down the biggest guy in the opposing team has granted him some honour for the day, and so he's sitting and talking with Matt and Finn when Kurt and Brittany walk in together.

After collecting up their food, Brittany begins towards the jock-filled table, but stops when she realises Kurt isn't following. " Come sit with us," she invites, shifting on her feet in way that makes her uniform skirt swish against her bare legs.

" I think that's maybe not the best idea," Kurt declines, shaking his head. Out of the corner of his eye, Mike can see Azimio and Karofsky leering and eager to pounce, and thinks that maybe Kurt has a point.

Brittany just smiles. " But you're on the football team now. You can eat at the cool kid's table."

Mike winces when she calls it that, because only Brittany would use the label so earnestly and honestly.

Kurt holds his head up, but speaks softly. " Brittany that's sweet but I think we all know I don't belong over here. I'm going to go sit with Mercedes and Tina and I'll see you in English, okay?"

Brittany's face is disappointed, and she sets her lunch down on the table, reaching out for his hand. " I wanted to talk to you about Alexander McQueen. I'm still confused," she confesses.

" Spring/Summer collection. Nothing to do with Nazis," Kurt replies wearily, and Mike knows this must be an ongoing conversation because he has no idea what on earth they're taking about.

Brittany seems to find hope in his words because she tugs on his hand. " Come on, you're my awesome gay dolphin, come have lunch with me."

The words seem to echo round the table. Mike can feel some of the other players stirring and snickering and he freezes, like waiting for lions to strike, waiting for someone to make a move.

That someone, however, is Kurt. Pulling his hand from Brittany's he looks at her sharply and his words, when they come out, are a hiss, " Brittany, stop it. Stop being stupid."

At the harsh tone, Brittany's face falls and Mike feels his heart skip. " I'm sorry," she stammers a reply, but Mike can tell she doesn't understand why Kurt is mad at her. She drops into her seat, staring despondently at her salad.

Kurt can also, apparently, see that he's upset her, because his face twists and he says her name, " Brittany."

She doesn't move, doesn't even turn around to look at him. " I'll see you in English."

Kurt remains frozen for a moment, but then nods his head and without any more words turns on his heel and walks towards the table where Mercedes and Tina sit. Mike watches them for a moment, Mercedes greeting him with her wide smile and Tina pushing her long, dark hair back from her face. He can see Kurt say something and nod their way, and when Tina looks over her gaze crashes with Mike's and then they're just staring at each other and he can't help but blush. Blinking, quickly, to break the moment, he turns to Brittany who still sits poking at her lettuce with a carrot stick. " You want some of my chips?"

He holds out the bag to her, but she shakes her head. " I don't understand," she whispers.

It's a common thing for her to admit, and so he can't help but ask for clarification. " You don't understand what?"

She turns and looks at him, and her face is wearing such melancholy that it actually makes him hurt. " Me and Kurt are friends. I'm on the Cheerios, he's on the football team. We're both in Glee Club. We've made out. Why won't he have lunch with me? Did I do something wrong? Is it because I don't understand the difference between conscious and conscience? He tried to explain it but I just got tired and started playing 'America's Next Top Model' in my head."

He's at a loss, really, because Brittany looks so sad and he doesn't want to make her feel worse. " Look, he shouldn't have called you stupid Brit, but I think he's worried that if he sits over here, some of the other guys aren't going to like it."

" Why?"

" Because he's gay," Mike says, but keeps his voice low. He knows it's not really any of his business who Kurt likes or wants to date, but to even say the word in earshot of some of his team mates is asking for trouble.

" So? I'm a girl and we're just eating. No one cares when Santana and me sit together."

He lets that moment slide, for now, and bumps her with his shoulder. " Some people are just dumb, okay? And I think Kurt just wants to get through the day without having them in his face." Reaching down, he snags one of her carrot sticks and pops it in his mouth, glad that it makes her smile and smack him in the chest. Nudging her again, he says, " Anyways, if he sat over here it would mean I'd have to share you. And your food."

She laughs and finally picks up her fork, but all the time they're eating he catches her looking over at the other table. The football team behind him laugh loudly and throw tots at each other.

The next day at lunch he grabs her hand before she can sit down and pulls her across the cafeteria floor. " Come on."

Her face is confused but she follows him, and as they reach the table he sees understanding dawn on her face. Mercedes, Kurt and Tina sit together, and when they see the two of them approach they look up, surprise clearly evident on their faces. Mike clears his throat and gestures his lunch bag. " Mind if we join you?"

There's a moment of absolute stillness, and then Kurt reaches out and grabs Brittany's hand, pulling her onto the seat next to him. " We're planning our next Spa Day," he tells her without preamble. " You just have to come."

Mike stands there for a moment, watching them, before he hears his name being called. " M-mike?" He looks down at the table and realises that Tina has just cleared a space for him. " You m-maybe want to s-sit down?"

She's teasing, but he nods and slides in next to her, and it's a little tight. But he spends his lunch break sharing chips with his Glee team mates and watching Brittany and Kurt talk, and well, if his leg has to be pressed against Tina Cohen-Chang's for an hour, then he's willing to make that sacrifice.

XxX

VI - Tina

It's a rainy weekend and the mall is crazy busy, but the day before at Glee rehearsal they had decided that they all wanted to see the new Saw movie. This, despite its R rating and the fact it's meant to be completely terrifying. To be honest, it hadn't really been on his list of must-sees, but Tina had pleaded and begged with a smattering of kisses, and he found - as he'd been finding since Asian camp - that he was totally powerless to say no to her. Or, well, he found that he didn't really want to say no to her.

" If you get scared I promise I'll hold your hand," she teases as they walk from the parking lot behind Puck and Finn and Rachel.

They send Brittany to buy the tickets (the clerk's a young guy, and if she doesn't *quite* look like the oldest then at least her smile and hair toss might have success with him). It almost works too, and the obviously smitten guy is just about to hand her the tickets when he asks, " You guys are 17 right?"

There's a moment of complete stillness and silence as they all watch her. She's wearing her flirty smile, but shakes her head. " No, I'm 16. How old are you?"

The groan is choral, and the next thing Santana's pulling Brittany away from the ticket window and hissing in her ear. " Brit, you should have just *lied*", and Brittany looks confused.

" But lying's bad. And he asked me a question and I knew the answer so I said it."

Tina, walking with her fingers laced with Mike's, shakes her head. " Well that was stupid." She doesn't see the look that flits across the taller girl's face before she and Santana peel off towards Old Navy, or even the way her boyfriend's fingers stiffen in her hand, and his shadowed eyes stare after Brittany and Santana as they go.

Puck, from his place leaning up against a shop window, whistles a long, low sound. " Wow Asian, it's a good thing you're a girl."

Mike doesn't realise that the rest of the group have dispersed into different stores until he turns around to face Puck and realises the three of them are alone. " Don't," he warns, but Puck has that mischievous, impish smile on his face, and Mike can tell it's piquing Tina's curiosity, because her brows are knotted in a frown and she looks between the two guys.

" What does he mean? Mike?"

Mike can see that Puck's going to rat him out whether he likes it or not, so he simply rolls his eyes and shoves the hand that isn't interlaced with Tina's deep into the pocket of his jeans. Tina tugs on his arm, once again prompting him with his name, " Mike?"

But it's Puck that answers, Puck that's been desperate to answer, and he approaches the couple with a swagger in his step, flinging his arm around Mike's shoulders. " The Changster's been known to pop someone for calling Brit stupid. I think you're safe because you're doing him, but don't say I didn't warn you."

Mike pushes him off, giving him the finger. " Bite me Puckerman." Then he turns his head and looks down at his girlfriend, whose green-lined eyes are wide with surprise.

" Mike, is that true?"

He feels the embarrassment creep up from his toes and he avoids her eyes, because he's not sure whether she's going to look upset or impressed and either way it was a really long time ago and he can't *beleive* Puck is bringing it up now. " It was just the one time," he admits, finally, before pointing a finger at Puck. " And by the way, you totally deserved it."

" You hit *Puck*?" There's a definite note of awe in her voice - because Puck's a badass, Puck doesn't take shit from anybody, Puck's one step away from jail or an early death. And Mike? Well, *really* isn't.

Puck's face is gleeful, and he reaches up and lightly smacks Mike's cheek. " Went all karate kid on me," he jokes, and begins to laugh, ducking out of Mike's reach. Then, with a wave - and seemingly realising his work is done - he walks away towards the food court. " I'm getting me some tacos. See you losers later."

Then he's gone, and the two of them are alone, and Tina's looking up at him with a curious expression. " When did all this happen?"

With a sigh, realising she's not going to leave it alone, he tugs her by the hand until they're sitting side by side on one of the mall's benches. " Freshman year," he admits, reaching out to finger the lace at the edge of her skirt, brushing her knee gently. " And it's not exactly something I'm proud of."

" Were you - were you two together back then? You and Brittany I mean." The question trips from her lips and he can see it's hard for her to ask it (he knows there were rumours because he and Brittany have been close for so long), and he can see the relief wash over her face when he shakes his head.

" No, she's just my friend," he assures her. Because even though Brittany is pretty and makes him laugh and is *amazing* to dance with, she's never been more than that. " I know she's maybe not the most academic of all of us, but she works hard and she's never unkind on purpose." At this, Tina's chin drops down and he knows she feels bad about what she said to the other girl, but he doesn't stop. " And she notices way more than people give her credit for." He reaches out, taking her hand again and squeezing it gently. " She knew when I was into you."

At this, she looks up again, a shy smile beginning to form. "She didn't say anything."

Mike nods his head, " I know, because I asked her not to. She's good like that, she's a good person. So I don't like it when people call her stupid."

There's a smile on her face that he can't quite read, and then she's shifting closer and his t-shirt is bunched in her fist and she's kissing him - *really* kissing him - right there in the middle of the mall. He wraps his arms around her, pulling her closer, inhaling the scent of her (he's memorised it - peppermint toothpaste, cucumber bodyscrub, coco-mango shampoo and just Tina) and he's just leaned in for another kiss when she pulls back.

" Brittany."

Mike's confused for a moment as to why she's thinking about another girl while they're making out, but then his brain reboots enough to see Brittany and Santana standing five feet away looking half-amused, half-uncomfortable.

" We wanted to see if you guys wanted to go get Orange Julius," Brittany begins, swinging her shopping bag in her hand, the other linked pinky-to-pinky with Santana, who simply smirks before adding, " We didn't realize we'd be interrupting you getting your mack on."

Tina and Mike both blush - he can feel the heat in his cheeks and Tina's tinge pink, just slightly - and then they're untangling themselves from each other and getting to their feet. Mike watches as Tina strides straight up to Brittany and they begin walking side-by-side towards the food court.

" I'm really sorry about what I said earlier Brittany. You're not stupid at all and it was really unfair of me to say that." She pauses, looking up at the taller blonde, who's face reads surprise and appreciation. " I know what it's like to have people call you names, and I know how much it hurts. I won't do it again."

They both stop walking for a moment, and then Brittany's arms are around Tina and Tina squeezes back and Mike gets a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach to see his girlfriend and his oldest friend wearing matching - slightly watery - smiles, and then they're looping their arms through each others as they walk, heads together and whispering and giggling in the way that only girls who are equally pretty can do.

He's confused, and amazed, and is just about to follow them when he feels a hand on his elbow.

Santana's eyes are fixed on the duo as well, and for once, the expression on her face is soft and the happiness reaches all the way to her eyes. " She's a good one," she judges after a long pause, and then punching him on the arm she walks off after the other two girls. " Don't fuck it up."

XxX

VII - Rachel

After Glee rehearsal Mike and Tina loiter, pretending that he has to tie his shoelace and she's slow at buckling her bag. Mr Schue looks at them with suspicion, but then Coach Sylvester is calling him from the hallway and so he leaves for the next round of their ongoing pissing match and doesn't look back.

When the last person is out of the door they grab each other, lips on lips because really, a whole school day without making out with Tina is just far too long. Her fingers sneak under the hem of his t-shirt and trace over his abs and skate along the waste-band of his jeans, and he groans into her mouth and she laughs. " You're so easy."

" And you're such a tease."

His hands are slipping down, over the rough tartan of her skirt, then sliding back up the smooth skin of her thighs when they are interrupted by a sound that makes them jump apart.

" It's completely ridiculous!"

Rachel's voice is cutting and completely ruins the moment, and Tina's face is splashed with curiosity. " I wonder what's got up her ass this time," she whispers, half laughing, leaning her head against his shoulder as he rubs his hands up and down her back.

Only when they hear the second voice are they spurred to move. " I *am* Brittany S Pierce. I'm sorry Rachel I know it sucks for you but I'm totally awesome and I'm going to have all the solos from now on."

They're outside of the door in time to see Rachel cross her arms over her polka-dotted sweater and roll her eyes. " Look, Brittany, while I applaud your newly found sense of self-confidence, I just don't think you have the vocal range or – dare I say it, the je ne sais quois – to really challenge for the lead lines. Besides, calling yourself Britney Spears is an infringement. If the wrong person hears you, you could get sued and then none of us will even be able to go to Sectionals."

Mike and Tina watch as Brittany just stares, vacantly, before flipping her hair over her shoulder. " I don't want a fringe."

Rachel's face crumples in confusion. " What?"

" You said I should get an infringement, but I just finished growing out my bangs so - "

Mike's pretty sure that Rachel's one Brittany-ism away from either stamping her foot on the ground like a toddler or having some kind of complete nervous breakdown, so he lets out a small, subtle cough. " Everything okay?"

He's pretty sure Brittany didn't see them coming, because her eyes light up and she gingerly shuffles away from Rachel, leaning into Tina. Lowering her voice, she whisper conspiratorially, " I think Rachel's jealous that I'm going to be more famous than she is."

It's clearly all too much for Rachel. Throwing her hand up in the air, she shrieks, " This is just ridiculous! It's stupid that you could think one nitrous-oxide fueled delusion at the dentist's office means you're going to be soloing at Sectionals!"

" Rachel…" Tina's tone is warning, her eyes meet Mike's before going askance to Brittany, knowing how the word 'stupid' effects them both. Brittany's face drops, just for a second, before a practiced mask of ignorance slams in place. She sticks a pen in her mouth and chews on the end as a distraction.

The warning tone seems to impact Rachel, at least slightly. Whirling around, she picks up her bag and shakes her head. " Fine. Fine, I see what you're all doing. You're just envious of my talent, I can see it."

She's about to do a full Rachel Berry storm down the hall, but Tina's hand on her arm stills her. " Rachel," she begins, and it's the placating voice that Mike recognizes from their time around hoards of small, volatile children at Asian Camp. " Don't you think it's good that Brittany's feeling so good about her voice?"

" Of course, I just - "

" And don't you think furthering her confidence can only help us at Sectionals, and even Regionals?"

" Well, yes I suppo - "

" So I'm sure you – as the bigger person – can admit that she's not stupid, and that she is Brittany S Peirce. Our very own Britney Spears."

There's a standoff. Tina and Rachel stare at each other, and Mike's just watches them silently because he so very rarely gets to see Tina stand up to anyone, and now she's standing up to Rachel at her most unreasonable. He can't help but be kind of impressed. Brittany simply chews on the end of her biro, not realizing that her lips are being stained blue as she sucks.

It seems as though Tina doesn't even blink, her dark gaze fixed on Rachel's with absolute resolve, furiously staring until Mike can see the smaller girl relent. " Fine," Rachel sighs with a dramatic exhale, and spins on her heel to face the taller blonde. " You are Britney Spears. You're Britney Spears. Congratulations."

And with that, she storms off down the hall.

The bell rings, and prompts Brittany to leave as well, her backpack over her shoulder and her teeth and tongue navy blue (like it had been after the plaque tablet test, but even more syrupy and staining), and she wiggles her fingers in a wave as she takes off, humming 'Toxic' under her breath.

Mike turns to Tina, a small smile on his face, and reaches out to wind his arms around her waist. " That, Tina Cohen-Chang, was totally hot."

" What?"

Leaning down, he presses a kiss into the skin where her neck meets her shoulder, and can feel the breath catch in her throat. " You stood up to Rachel, and you took care of Brittany, and you did it without making either of them feel bad."

" I don't know," she murmurs against his skin. " Rachel looked pretty pissed."

He chuckles, the sound low and deep in his chest. " Rachel's pissed when the cafeteria is out of soy yogurt. She'll get over it. I just mean – you didn't have to tear her down to build Brittany up. And that is really hot to me."

She lets him trail his kisses up her neck, behind her ear and down her nose before landing on her lips. They make out until he's dizzy and she's breathing heavy and they're both grinning. " You're a strange man Mike Chang."

" Yeah, but I'm your strange man. Deal with it."

XxX

VIII - Mercedes

Science isn't exactly his favourite subject at the best of times - worse now he's missing lunch with Tina in order the spend time on it - but Mike knows it's pretty bad that they're only fifteen minutes into their group project and he's ready to bang his head against the wall. He's hoping a gaping, bleeding head wound might be enough to get him out of this.

He, Mercedes, Puck and Brittany sit around a desk in the Library, text books spread around them, large sugar paper and magic markers scattered across the table, but other than their title - 'The Periodic Table' - they have yet to write a single word on the page.

" I don't understand," Brittany says, blowing a bubble with her gum, the loud popping sound ripping through the silence and earning them a glare and a 'shhh' from the librarian. Brittany drops her voice to a whisper and repeats, " I don't understand."

" What don't you understand?" Mike asks, his fingers fiddling with the zipper on his hooded sweatshirt.

From across the table, Puck half-laughs, half-sighs and tips back on his chair, staring at the ceiling. " Dude, do we really have time for that question?"

Mercedes chuckles but turns it into as cough as soon as she sees the look on Mike's face.

" Brit?" he prompts again, gently.

" How is it a table? It doesn't even have any legs. Just lots of letters and numbers."

Puck gives in and lets out a laugh, and Mercedes can't help but join in. She looks at Brittany with an almost fond smile on her face, " Girl, it's a good thing you're pretty because you are radiating stupid."

She doesn't notice that Puck stops laughing, or that Mike never starts, or that Brittany freezes where she's doodling flowers on the corner of the paper and instead holds the pen limply between her fingers. Then Puck leans forward and grabs one of the text books and starts talking - overly enthusiastically - about Halogens, and they both pretend not to notice when Brittany slips out of the room to get herself a soda, her shoulders slumped.

Mike finds himself watching her go, and he's almost surprised when he hears Puck's voice.

" Not cool 'Cedes," he murmurs, shaking his head as he leafs through the pages.

Mercedes looks confused by the dressing down. " You got a problem with something?" she asks, crossing her arms across her chest.

One eyebrow rises on Puck's face, and Mike can feel the gaze on him even as he stares at his notebook. " I don't know," Puck says, tapping his pencil on the desk in a frenetic rhythm. " Do I?" Then, leaning forward, he sets his chair back down on four legs with a thump. " Stupid is as stupid does baby, and I can't judge 'cause I've done some serious stupid in the past. Brit can't help if she was dropped on her head as a child."

" Puck - " Mike starts, already tired of the subject, wanting just to get on with their presentation so he can grab some food, make it through the afternoon of classes and then convince Tina that coming over before his mom gets home from work is an excellent idea. Mercedes looks aghast at the idea of baby Brittany bouncing her brain off the sidewalk, so Mike intervenes, " She wasn't dropped on her head."

" That you know of."

Mercedes' expression a bit shamefaced, and a bit curious, and Mike can tell she can't help but wonder as the words come flying from between her lips, " So she really is stup - "

" She's just Brittany." Mike's voice is hard and final and the way Mercedes nods and turns back to the books means she knows the topic is closed.

Puck just rolls his eyes and goes back to studying.

XxX

IX - Santana

The party's pumping and the drinks flowing. Mike can feel the whiskey running through him, from the tingling in his fingers to the warm feeling pooling in the pit of his stomach. His head is kind of fuzzy, and he he can't help but grin whenever Tina catches his eye from where she is dancing around the middle of the living room with Santana, their cascades of dark hair whipping behind them as their arms fly and pound the air. Tina's skirt keeps flipping up as she jumps, and Mike can't help but enjoy the intermittent flash of hot pink panties from across the room.

It's the first 'popular' party that he and Tina have been to together, despite being a couple for more than six months. It's not that he hasn't wanted to bring her, but the atmosphere has been kind of awkward up until now. Quinn and Finn have been finding their feet back in the clique and the rest of the guys feel the unease. But one of the Seniors from the football team had actually invited them *both* to their faces, so they couldn't exactly say no. And seeing how much fun Tina seems to be having with the now ex-Cheerio girls, he's glad they're there.

He's just taken another drink when a flash of blonde hair stumbles past him, and he sees Brittany heading towards the two other girls with an empty bottle dangling between her fingers and a large grin on her face. " Brittany in the house!" she cries, flinging her arms around both girls simultaneously, the three of them bumping and grinding as Usher's voice comes across the stereo.

Mike watches as Tina throws her head back and laughs, and then - seemingly realising her drink is empty - tosses her red plastic cup on the floor, leaving the other girls behind her before half-dancing, half-falling towards him and winding her arms around his neck. " Hello Mr Chang," she giggles against his cheek, before kissing him hard. Pulling back, her nose wrinkles. " You taste like whiskey."

" And you taste like tequila," he says, letting his tongue trace her lips. " And lime and salt."

" Mmm," she murmurs against his mouth. " S'tana and I were doing shots."

The two of them half-dance together to the sounds of Usher's 'Yeah', him mumbling the words into her neck as his hands roam across her hips and further down, cupping her ass and making them fit together in that oh so perfect way, and she's biting on his bottom lip, and he's about to suggest they find an empty room or closet or - hell - even a stretch of wall when the sound of hysterical giggling from behind makes him pull his head away.

" Brit, no..." Santana's laughing, her hands on Brittany's shoulders as she half-heartedly pushes her.

But Brittany doesn't seem to be listening, instead she's rubbing herself up and down Santana's leg, and Mike wonders when exactly it was that she lost her shirt and had ended up just in her jade-green bra and knee-high boots. " Come on honey," she smiles, half-seductive half-tipsy. " I want to get my mack on."

Their voices are louder then perhaps they think, because Mike can make out every word from across the room, despite the music and Tina fingering his belt buckle. Santana ducks out of the way of Brittany's questing lips, leaving the other girl to stumble forwards, catching herself through luck more than balance. " Not here," she insists. " People will talk."

Mike realises that Tina's interest has been caught as well, because she's stopped groping him and is instead watching the drama unfold across the room. " Mike, are they - ?" she begins, but is cut off by the sound of Brittany's insistent voice.

" I don't care," Brittany grins, twisting her hips around in a way that makes a couple of guys catcall from across the room before turning back to their beer pong. " It doesn't matter, because it's us, right? And you love our sweet lady-kisses."

People have turned their heads towards them now, and are starting to become curious about what's happening between the two girls, and Mike can see the moment the panic takes over Santana's face. Mike and Tina both watch as Brittany leans in, going for a kiss, and Santana ducks out the way. This time, Brittany's balance doesn't succeed, and she goes toppling onto the couch in a mess of sprawled arms and naked legs. Someone laughs, and Santana stares at her, conflicting emotions clashing on her face. Guilt and fear. " Don't be stupid, Brittany, I'm not like that," she hisses, before storming away.

Mike and Tina look at one another - speaking without words - and sober up in an instant. Splitting apart, Tina rushes to the couch where Brittany sits, her face beginning to crumple. Tina wraps her arms around the taller, half-dressed girl, who has tears welling in her eyes. " I just thought...yesterday we were...cuddling and...she loves when I dance!" The words trip out between sobs, and Tina rubs her back, eyeing Mike with one simple message.

Fix this.

After circling the house three times, he eventually finds Santana in one of the upstairs bedroom, straddling a Freshman who looks half-terrified and half-awestruck as she dry humps him, thrusting her breasts into his face. " Am I interrupting?" Mike asks in a loud voice, pushing the door all the way open and not hesitating even when the Freshman curses and pushes Santana off of him. Mike glares at the kid as he scurries from the room, adjusting his crotch on the way out.

" No offense Chang but you're not exactly who I was planning on getting jiggy with," she tells him, busy buttoning her shirt back up and then tossing her hair behind her shoulders. When he doesn't say anything, she looks over at him. " You want something or you just here for the show?"

He crosses his arms over his chest, and for that moment is pleased that his height advantage allows him to look down on her. " You know she's crying down there."

If he hadn't known her since they were five, Mike might have missed the pain flickering over Santana's face, but then it's gone and her usual mask of indifference is in its place. " Yeah, well, Britbrit needs to learn that no means no."

She goes to push past him, but then his hand is on her shoulder and makes her still, and his voice is low and direct. " You and I both know she isn't stupid," he tells her without room for argument. " Not about anything, and certainly not about this. And look, whatever's going on with you two - and I don't need to know what it is - she's your best friend. She's been your best friend since you could talk. And now she's downstairs crying."

She drops her chin, eyes dark and suspiciously wet looking. " I didn't mean - "

A held up hand stops her voice, but the curt gesture is softened by the gentle squeeze of his fingers around her wrist. " Don't tell me, tell her, okay?"

Santana's nodding her head, and sniffling, and he averts his eyes so she feels like she has privacy, at least for a moment. When she lifts her head again, she's wearing her normal, smart-ass smile. " You just want me to go dance with Brittany so you can get your girlfriend back and go get your freak on," she teases.

" Damn straight," he smiles back and holds the door open for her to go ahead.

When they get back to the living room Tina and Brittany are still on the sofa, and Tina is feeding Brittany small sips of what looks like koolaid but - when Mike gets closer - smells like vodka and skittles. At the sight of Santana, Brittany's face takes on a nervous, hopeful quality, which blossoms into sheer joy as the brunette holds out her hand. " Come on baby, they're playing our song."

Brittany takes her hand, and Mike watches as they spin onto the dance floor, grins painted on both their faces.

Mike starts when he feels arms slip around his waist, but the hands are familiar and so is the scent, and when she slides around to face him, Tina's dark pupils are wide. " Mike?" she whispers, leaning up so her lips are right next to his ear.

" Yeah T?"

She looks left, then right, and then stares right into his eyes. " I don't want to freak you out, but I think there might be something going on between those two."

X - Artie

As soon as Mike sees Brittany running down the hall - one hand pressed over her mouth and sobs escaping from beneath her fingers, her white boots clacking against the worn linoleum floor - he knows it's bad. Tina sees her running past the second after he does, and worry washes over her face.

" Artie?" she guesses just as he wonders, " Santana?" and the two of them stare at each other for a moment.

He doesn't move - for a moment he doesn't know what to do - but then he feels Tina taking his notebook out of his hands. " You need to go after her," she insists, sliding his books into her locker along with her own, so that their names mingle in the darkness. " Talk to her." Her hand is on his elbow, steering him the direction Brittany ran, and the smile on her face is small, and lingering somewhere between sadness and pride. " It's okay."

Leaning down, he presses a warm kiss to her lips. " I'll find you after," he promises before taking off down the hall, and he knows without looking that Tina watches him go.

Brittany isn't in any of her usual hiding places, and neither is she answering her phone, and so when Mike walks outside he's running mainly on hope. When he catches a flash of gold hair behind her motorcycle he finds himself sighing with relief and walks straight over, lowering himself onto the gum-speckled curb without a second's hesitation. " Room for one more?"

Brittany's cheeks are streaked with tears, her eyes red and her breath coming in sharp rasps. When she recognises him, there's a moment of sheer relief, and then her face crumples and she falls heavily against his chest. He feels wetness seep through his t-shirt and wraps his arms around her, whispering nonsense soothing words into her hair until her sobbing finally subsides. Then, as she pulls away, he hears her words, " He was the only one who never..." But her words are cut off with a sniffle as she rubs her eyes with the back of her wrist.

" Artie?" Mike prompts for clarification, thinking that the 'he' is probably a good enough clue but wanting to really be sure. When Brittany nods, he feels something flare in his stomach. Despite some jealousy on both their parts when he and Tina had first got together (he knew Artie had been angry that they had coupled so soon after he and Tina had broken up, and well, there were certain 'firsts' of Tina's, that because of Artie, he'd never get back), he actually likes the guy and doesn't like the feeling that he should be mad at him. " What happened?"

She rests her head against his shoulder, and he can't help but keep his arm around her. " He thinks I'm cheating on him," she sighs, and her voice is still shaky.

" Not with me again?" he teases, his voice purposefully aghast, and it's enough to illicit a watery chuckle from her.

She smiles, just slightly, but then the smile drops and she shakes her head. " With Santana."

" Ah."

Her bottom lip is between her teeth and he can't help but think she must be kind of cold sitting on the sidewalk in her red shorts, but he doesn't press for them to move. She pushes her hair back from her face and looks up at him from the corner of her eye. " Do you remember when you asked me if I was stupid?"

He's shocked, because he's always considered himself her fiercest supporter and so the accusation makes his stomach drop to his shoes. " What?"

She nods her head, slowly, " You did. We were nine. Right before you offered to tutor me in math so I wouldn't have to repeat."

The memory is murky, he remembers tutoring her, of course he does, but he doesn't recall ever - " Are you sure I called you...that?"

Her laugh is tinged with melancholy, " You were the first one. I mean, at least you asked it as a question instead of just throwing it at me. Like, why is okay to call me stupid but no one in Glee would ever call Mercedes fat?"

He's speechless, and just about manages to shrug his shoulders. " I don't know," he answers honestly.

" Up until today Artie was the only person in this school who I care about who had never called me stupid. And now he's ruined it."

He can see tears are welling in her eyes again, so he pulls her closer to his chest. " You want me to beat him up for you?" he offers, only half-joking, but Brittany shakes her head against him. He's pretty sure she's leaving mascara streaks down his t-shirt, but he doesn't move her. " Why did he - I mean, what made him - ?" he starts, but is unsure how to phrase the question.

Her sigh is deep and seems to come all the way from her toes. " He thinks I'm letting Santana manipulate me." Leaning forward, away from him, she pulls her knees up to her chest, propping her chin on top. " He thinks she's putting words into my mouth as well as her tongue."

The mental image is a striking one, and he has to shake it off before he can ask his next question. " What do you think?"

She tugs on a piece of her loose hair, twirling it around her finger as she stares across the parking lot. " I think... can you love more that one person at once?"

He lets his eyes wander across the parking lot as well, watching the shards of spring sunlight bounce off the windshields of the collected automobiles. " I think you can love lots of people. But, can you be *in love* with more than one person? I don't think so." He shakes his head, thinking hard and breathing in deeply. " I think at some point you have to give yourself up to it, and if there's even a little part of you thinking about someone else, I don't think it works. I think it makes it too hard." He pauses, and then reaching out, laces his fingers with hers. She turns her head so her cheek is resting on her knees and looks at him as he asks, " Brit, are you in love with Artie?"

Her voice is very small. " I do love him."

" But are you in love with him?"

Her shrug speaks volumes.

" Are you in love with Santana?"

There's a long pause, and then, " She's too scared to be in love with me."

It doesn't really answer his question, but in a way it does, because he's known Brittany so long that he's learned how to read her. Everything from a hair toss to an emphasis on a word, to a shy half smile. " Look, Brit, I know we sing in Glee all the time about how magic and unexpected love is, but the way I see it, the *stupid* ones are the people that *believe that*. I think that being in love is something I do. Like Tina and me, we wake up every day and choose to be with each other, and we work at it. And that's what love is, to me. It's not easy, it doesn't just happen. But isn't that what makes it worth it?" When he's finished speaking, he realises two things at once: one, that Brittany is staring at him with wide, suprised eyes, and two, that he just sounded like *such* a girl. His face flushes. " You're not going to tell anyone about this are you?"

The way her fingers tighten in his says more than words could, but her lips curve into the first true smile he's seen since finding her out here. " As long as I get to be bridesmaid at your wedding."

Standing up, he pulls her to her feet and wraps his arms around her.

" Brittany," he squeezes her, tight against his body, " you have got yourself a deal."

XxX