But I don't want to ever go back
To my old ways
Cheatin' and creepin' around
I don't ever want to go back
To the old days
Leaving the dead underground
But I don't ever want to go
No, I don't ever want to go back
To my old ways again

-My Old Ways; by Dr. Dog

June 9th, 1987

It was so close to being summer. The one time a year where Macey felt at peace. She'd enjoy feeling the sun on her skin and the warmth in the air. She'd plan trips with friends and family, from something as simple as going to the beach to something exciting like traveling abroad. In all honesty, summertime was the one time out of the year Macey could enjoy herself. She felt as if the pressures of every day life lifted from her shoulders the second the sun came out. She'd feel like she could do absolutely anything. And that feeling only seemed to intensify when she encountered him. He was very charismatic, easily winning over Macey's affections without so much as lifting a finger. Not only did he have charm on his side, but he seemed to find a way to make anything fun. It was almost like he didn't have to try. Macey absolutely loved that! Over the course of a couple weeks, the two of them would meet up daily, talking and laughing, having as much fun as possible before the end of summer. As more time went on, however, Macey started to notice how the way they interacted started changing. He was mellowing out some, showing a more. . . .softer side. She was finding herself drawn to him in a way she hadn't been before.

They were, unsurprisingly, becoming attracted to each other.

He managed to take her on two dates before they slept together. They both acknowledged it was a bit quick to jump in like that, but they also acknowledged how it felt kinda. . . .right. After that moment, they officially started a little romance. The two lived in their own little world when they were together, having fun and being there for each other. That was something Macey felt she hadn't had before. Her parents, David and Ines, were Jewish immigrants from Poland and Syria respectively. The older couple worked nonstop in order to provide for their family, which meant their daughter was usually left in the care of neighbors. Once she got older, she learned to take care of herself. As for her boyfriend, he claimed to have been on his own for as long as he could remember. His father wasn't in the picture, he claimed, and he wasn't close to any of his siblings. As for any maternal figure, he'd never say anything.

"Seems like we've both got a little bit of family issues," Macey had said.

"Your parents work for you," he'd reply, "my father abandoned us."

After that, the subject was never brought up again. The two of them chose to focus on each other, to bring happiness and contentment in their companionship. And as it got more serious, there were more things Macey started to notice. She wasn't allowed to meet his family — they wouldn't approve of her. The two of them were not allowed to have children — again, his family wouldn't approve. They weren't allowed to get married — why? Because of his family's disapproval. It seemed as though, despite not having any involvement in their lives, he was still heavily influenced by them. Macey couldn't understand why there had to be such strict rules about their relationship. There were none in the beginning. He had no problems goofing off with her initially. Everything was fun and amazing and almost like a dream.

"You're still letting your family dictate what you can do," Macey had exclaimed. "Why does it matter if we start a family? Or if we get married? It's not gonna be the end of the world."

"It's complicated," he'd practically shout. "There's no way I'd be able to explain it in a way that makes sense. OK? I don't know how to tell you except that it won't end well."

That put a strain on their relationship. Macey refused to see him again after that. She was angry that he'd allow his family's needs to come before her. She really thought he cared about her, that they'd manage to be together. That was when the doubt started to come in. Two weeks would go by with Macey doubting herself and their relationship. Two whole weeks before either of them saw each other again. He apologized for his outburst, she forcefully smiled and accepted. They stayed together up until September, when Macey started to feel a little queasy. She thought it was her getting sick. A lot of her friends had fallen ill to a bug that was going around, and the young woman assumed she was catching it. But Macey quickly noticed how different her symptoms were to theirs. From early morning to early afternoon, she'd be extremely sick. Some days she'd vomit, other days she wouldn't. She was tired all the time and even some of her favorite foods made her ill. Not only that, but she noticed an increase in her breast size, accompanied by some sensitivity.

For a fleeting moment, Macey thought she was imagining it all. She was tiny, she'd always had an average body size for her height, and all her curves were ordinary in size. She wasn't anything special, so she was hoping the increasing size and sensitivity in her breasts was her mind playing tricks on her. Macey prayed that the vomiting and unbearable queasiness was maybe a stomach bug. But she knew, deep down, what it could mean. And it terrified her. It had always been a plan of hers to have a family, but she wanted marriage to come first. Her boyfriend was very much against them being wedded. Not only that, but children were in no way part of their future. He didn't want to risk "bringing his family's wrath upon her", as he had said. But Macey knew she'd have to take a test just to be sure. If she were really pregnant, then she'd be in a load of trouble. In their intimate moments, they worked on being careful, but condoms and birth control wasn't always 100%. The chances of falling pregnant were still there.

Needless to say, unfortunately, Macey nearly had a heart attack once her fear was confirmed. She was expecting. She'd bought three different pregnancy tests, hoping they'd come back negative. Seeing those little positive signs, knowing that there was a life growing in Macey's stomach, made her feel as if her entire world was falling apart. She felt nauseous, lightheaded, breathless — all her emotions were swirling inside her like a tornado. She wanted the baby, but she knew at the same time he didn't. A baby would cause conflicts between them and his family. All this drama over a baby. . . .was it really worth it? Did Macey want to deal with the "wrath" of her boyfriend's family? God no. Did she want to deal with his reaction over the news? Well, no. She loved her boyfriend, but she also knew she wanted children one day. She felt conflicted. Macey thought about leaving him to raise the baby. At least that way he wouldn't be dealing with so much unnecessary problems. But it was hard for Macey to even think about leaving him. There was also the thought of leaving for the duration of the pregnancy and putting the baby up for adoption. But the one thought that disturbed Macey the most was the thought of miscarriage. She knew that losing the first pregnancy was fairly common; it happened to her mother before she'd been born. So, if she suffered a miscarriage, would it be better? Would it ease the soon-to-be drama? That made her squirm uncomfortably.

Thankfully, in a way, all of that fear and uncertainty, all of those thoughts and worries, happened practically nine months ago. Now, in Macey's current situation, she was filled with so much fear and anxiety it was overwhelming. She was leaning against a wall, clutching her swollen stomach as pain coursed throughout her body. Wave after wave, it seemed to go on forever. Over the course of Macey's pregnancy, she'd experienced little pains here and there, bouts of discomfort and things that didn't seem natural. Her unborn child seemed to be more. . . .aware. It was almost like Macey's child knew where it was at, what was going on in the outside world — things that made the mother-to-be a little unsettled. While this was her first child, Macey knew enough to understand no unborn child behaved like that. In fact, no pregnancy should've felt like the one the soon-to-be mother was going through. The pain and discomfort, sure it could be expected in a normal pregnancy, but that was something Macey experienced throughout. It only got more intense as the months ticked by. By the time she got to the ninth month, she wasn't sure if the pains were contractions or the usual ones that just so happened to occur. Maybe it was both. Maybe Macey was finally going into labor. The one thing she was a little happy for was choosing to leave her boyfriend the day she found out. She didn't have the courage to give him a valid explanation, only that it was over. He'd been heartbroken, naturally, but Macey did her best to overlook that. She believed leaving him was in their best interest.

Without warning, a sudden wetness gushed between Macey's legs. Her eyes widened as a powerful wave of pain washed over her body. It was unbearable, so intense it almost made her black out.

"Margo," she rasps, gripping her stomach tightly. "Margo!"

In an instant, a woman no older than her early thirties comes rushing in. Her black hair was tugged back and her eyes were wide. "It's happening?" she asks. Macey gave a single nod. Swallowing thickly, Margo nodded in return. "OK then."

O.O.O.O

She was pregnant, that was why she left. Macey didn't want to let him know, for the sake of keeping things decent between him and his family. For keeping things decent between him and her. The only thing that gorgeous human didn't know was that Gabriel hadn't seen his family in centuries. That he was, in fact, an Archangel. With how things were going in Heaven, knowing God had abandoned his children and how Lucifer and Michael would eventually destroy the world — it was too much for the Archangel to bear. He'd left his home to live amongst the humans. He obtained the title "The Trickster" over the time he'd been on Earth. Gabriel also managed to land himself the name of "Loki", as well. He was worshipped as both an angel and a demigod. It was an impressive feat, honestly, but it still left the Archangel feeling a twinge of emptiness inside. Despite all he'd done for himself on Earth, he still couldn't stop himself from worrying about his family. Macey and his child, God and the angels. He was torn between them. Gabriel knew his ex-lover wouldn't survive childbirth. A human woman birthing a Nephilim was usually fatal. And with him being so powerful, that meant Macey stood no chance. She'd die no matter what. It broke Gabriel's heart. Macey was a good woman, she deserved so much more.

Gabriel had to give her credit, though, she did have some balls in trying to proceed with the pregnancy. Especially on her own. No, he knew she wasn't stupid enough to try and give birth by herself. There had to be someone with her. Gabriel knew she liked to play it safe. Macey liked to have a back-up plan, and a back-up for the back-up. That was how she was. With a humorless chuckle, the Archangel ran a hand through his hair, an almost heartbroken look in his eyes. Very few beings on Earth were ever allowed to get close to him. Of course the ones he deemed worthy never really knew his origins. Times were changing, and peoples' beliefs in higher powers were changing, as well. Fewer and fewer people were relying on religion anymore, and Gabriel was content with that. At least, he tried to be. There were times he had his moments, feeling a little weak. Maybe too weak for comfort. Was that the result of his self-imposed protection program? To live a life of continual loneliness and weakness? He tried to fill it with fun and sweets, but it wasn't enough sometimes. All he could really hope for was a better tomorrow. Humans may be a bit primitive, relying heavily on violence and manipulation to get their needs, but in a way, they were similar to angels. Angels manipulated their brethren to get a personal gain. On occasion, violence would be used, but only if absolutely necessary. Just another reason why Gabriel chose to leave. He couldn't handle how his siblings were treating each other.

Rubbing his hands over his face, Gabriel sighed. He knew his child would be born soon, he could feel it. While Macey did her best to cover her tracks, the child's grace was strong. But the real question was whether or not any of Gabriel's siblings had come into contact with her yet. Had they at least tried? That'd be terrible. Gabriel wouldn't know how to live with himself. He knew that if he chose to stick around through Macey's pregnancy, then they'd be in bigger trouble. He wanted to protect them, to give them a life worth living, but that wouldn't happen if he stuck around. A pang of hurt washed over him. He wouldn't be there for his child, he wouldn't be there in Macey's final moments, and who knows whether he'd see his child grow up or not. Gabriel wanted nothing more than to live with his human lover in safety, to give her what she wanted and to have a great time. They'd been so happy before. . . .

His head whipped up for a moment. He'd felt a surge of energy, as if there was some kind of. . . .not an explosion, but maybe something similar. It was powerful and it made Gabriel's heart beat fast in his chest. That surge could only mean one thing.

(A/N):

Hey-yo. Sorry for the wait on the chapter, I hope you like it! It's a bit of a long one, and I'm hoping I didn't go overboard anything. If you think there're parts that need improvement, leave a review and let me know. Constructive criticism is always welcome. I won't be able to know how to better the story if I don't know what my weak points are.

Nothing in the SPN fandom belongs to me. All I own are my OCs, my subplots, and a love for my dog. If you've got ideas for an OC or a subplot, PM me or leave a review. I'll add it in as soon as possible.

On that note, I'll see you guys on the flip side.

Rudie Fenton