I step
into tender seconds trying on Mother's shoes

The Long April of Electra, Angela Readman

For Danielle. Merry Christmas, lovely girl.

"Castle, have you seen my shoes?" Kate calls through from the closet, the vivid purple velvet of her dress wrapped close around her limbs and smoothing over her curves with ease. But barefoot, she feels ridiculous. And they're going to be late.

Getting to her knees, the dress rides up and exposes another few inches of the pale skin at her thigh. In front of her is the shoe rack, her heels and sneakers and pumps and boots all laid out neatly in pairs. And right there, where the black open-toed pumps she needs should be is instead a hole, the gaping mouth of it mocking her.

"Rick." She calls again, hears the grit of frustration in her voice but there's nothing she can do to stem it. Not now. She'll make it up to him in the car with the touch of her mouth, but that's if they ever actually make it to that point.

When her husband appears in the doorway of the closet, the sharp edges of his suit framing the lines of his body and making her mouth a little dry, he has a smile flirting at the corners of his mouth. "I found your shoes."

"Oh, great. Where?"

Rick stretches out a hand to her and Kate gets to her feet again, takes a moment to come up on tiptoe and press her mouth to his before she follows him out of the closet and right through to the living room.

"Come on, baby girl." He murmurs, disappearing around the back of the couch. Kate stays where she is and presses two fingers to her mouth to quell the silly grin that wants to break out. Eventually, her husband comes back around, his large hand cradling the curve of their dark haired little girl's skull. Her curls spill over her father's fingers and she grins up at Kate when she sees her, opens her arms for her mother.

The hardwood is smooth under her from years of wear as Kate gets down to her daughter's level and reaches out her hands for the girl, little fingers coming to curl around her own. "I'm you, Mommy."

"I see that, beautiful girl." Kate laughs; shaking her head at her baby girl's halted progress towards her. On the girl's feet are Kate's shoes, absolutely dwarfing the tiny, slender feet of her daughter and making it almost impossible for her to walk.

"Anna, princess, can Mommy have her shoes back? We're running late, sweetpea." Castle says to their daughter, letting go of her once he's sure that Kate has a firm grip. Anna stumbles towards her mother and lands hard against the wall of Kate's chest, her arms coming up to lace around her mother's neck.

Pressing hot kisses to her baby girl's cheeks, Kate cards a hand through the spill of curls and sways a little, tries to soothe her tiny daughter. "Why don't you play dress up with Allie? You can try on any of my other shoes that you like, lovely girl. Just not these ones."

"I don't want you to go." Anna blinks up at her mother, glassy tears coalescing at the fringe of her lashes. The blush-coloured rosebud of her mouth trembles and she splays her fingers at Kate's cheek as if to keep her mother in place.

Castle gets down onto the floor with them and draws his arms around Kate, brings their daughter in against his chest as well. "Annie, baby. We'll see you in the morning, and we'll have loads of stories to tell you about the party. And you can have so much fun with Alexis tonight."

As if summoned by her name, Castle's daughter appears from the pantry and crosses over to them, sinks down onto the hardwood as well. "Hey there, Annie-bug. Are you trying on Mommy's shoes?"

"Mommy not go if I got them shoes." Anna says defiantly, burying her face against Kate's neck so she doesn't have to see any of the three grown-up faces staring back at her.

Alexis, bless her, scoops up her baby sister and rests the bulk of Anna's weight against her forearm so she looks almost seated, her legs straight out in front of her. Kate extracts her shoes from her daughter's feet and darts in to kiss her forehead, drawing in the sleepy scent of her.

Their little girl is confident and full of life; it's not that she doesn't want them to leave. It's just that she doesn't want to miss out on all the fun of the precinct Christmas party. Right from the moment she was passed around in the hospital, red-faced and squirming, her uncles and Aunt Lanie and even the captain have doted on Beckett's daughter.

They'll all be there tonight, and Anna hates that she won't get to join in the festivity, that she won't get to be bounced on Tío's knee or spin in Uncle Kevin's chair.

"Listen to me, Anna." Kate murmurs, taking her daughter back from Alexis to cradle her like a newborn. "When we have our New Year's party, you'll see everyone and have so much fun. But this is for grown-ups, okay?"

"But my baby gets to go." Anna frowns, splaying her hand against the subtle curve of Kate's stomach.

Castle laughs and lifts Anna into his arms, nuzzles at her cheek. "Baby has to stay safe in Mommy's tummy for a long time yet, sweet girl. But he won't get to join in any of the fun either."

"He?" Alexis raises an eyebrow, glances between her father and Kate.

Laughing, Kate shakes her head and shoves at her husband's shoulder, drops her hand to lift the bangs away from Anna's forehead. "He thinks he's getting a son. Start to balance out the abundance of females in his life."

"And you?" Alexis asks, taking Anna from her father and cradling the girl close to her chest.

Kate shrugs and gets slowly to her feet, steps into her shoes. "I think that as long as this baby is as happy and wonderful as his – or her – big sister, I really don't care."

"You know I don't really care either, right?" Castle says, standing up and settling his palm against the base of her spine, right at the flare of her hips. "Another Beckett-Castle baby is bound to be amazing, boy or girl."

The union of their surnames for their daughter was actually easier than Kate anticipated. It took her months to work up the courage to ask about it, but Castle had just grinned and kissed her and said that she was already giving him the gift of their child and he honestly didn't care whose name she wanted the baby to take.

So, yes, Anna Beckett-Castle, and she certainly lives up to both names. Such intense focus, but for fun and games and the enrichment of her imagination.

And. . .for Kate's mother, too. They toyed with naming their daughter Johanna, but it was so bitter that there really wasn't any sweetness to balance it out. Not for Kate, anyway. So, the second syllable seemed to work well, homage to and reminder of Anna's history and her heritage, the long line of strong women that fill both sides of her family.

"I know." Kate grins, coming in to press a soft kiss to her husband's mouth and then heading for the front door. She snags her clutch from the side table and turns back around, presses a kiss to Alexis' cheek and then leans down to nudge her nose against her daughter's. "You'll have so much fun with your big sister, I promise. And I'll see you in the morning. I love you."

"Love you too, Mommy." Anne murmurs, suddenly shy. Before she even gets a chance to bury her face against Alexis, though, Castle is drawing a laugh out of her with the raspberry he blows out against her neck. "Daddy, tickles."

He presses a kiss to their daughter's cheek and then comes back for Kate, laces his fingers in between hers. "You be good for your sister, okay? Love you princess."

"Love you Daddy."

Her husband unlocks the door and Kate steps out into the hall, waving goodbye to both of her daughters before Castle closes the door behind them and leans in to kiss her. And even though it's far too early, and it's all in her imagination, Kate could swear she feels the flutter of their youngest child's life low down in her stomach.

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