This is a One Shot, there may be a squeal... I haven't decided yet...
Buffy walked down the beach, the pink sundress swaying around her feet. She stepped into the water, looking at the clouds. The sun's raise heating her tanned skin. She smiled and leaned back into strong arms. She closed her eyes; feeling the cool arms around her, "Never leave me." Buffy whispered.
Spike kissed her lightly on the neck, "I'll be right here, forever if you'll let me." He promised.
Buffy smiled, "I never should have given you that talisman." Buffy whispered, her smile fading into a frown, "I need you, Spike." Buffy said turning in his arms, but when she turned to face him he was gone.
And she was face to face with a dark room, her room. Back in Sunnydale. She lay down on the bed, hugging the pillow. Feeling tears form behind her eyes. Then she felt feather light kisses on her shoulder. She smiled sadly, knowing. Turning on her back, letting her dream Spike take her in his arms and hold her. "I love you." She whispered.
Spike kissed her lightly on the lips, "You don't have to say it, love."
Buffy's eyes welled with tears, "Why wont you believe me?"
Spike kissed her again, "I do, love, I believe you, you're my everything." He whispered, "Never goin' to leave you, never."
Buffy sobbed. "I need you." Buffy whispered, "All of you, please, Spike, please."
"Shh, kitten, I'm right here."
This was him, Buffy's dream Spike, the man who entered her dream every night. The soul reason she'd gone to sleep closed her eyes and never opened them till morning.
Buffy gasped and opened her eyes looking around her small apartment, the dream was over. She hit reality hard and fast. She looked around the room, half excepting to find Spike with a cocky grin in her recliner. She got up from the bed and walked to the dresser, she'd asked Willow to do a spell to get some of there old things back. She got a photo; it was from her birthday party that year.
IT was of her and Spike playing cards on the floor behind the couch. She smiled, remembering that night. Or at least that morning. When he'd whispered all those birthday promises to her, she just excused them, rolled her eyes. Now she'd do anything to have him whisper them to her again.
She put down the photo and turned on her radio.
Without my wings I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
Every time I see you in my dreams
I see your face
It's haunting me.
Buffy closed her eyes, trying to trap the tears behind her eyelids. Trying desperately to stay strong. For him… He'd never want her to act like this.
He taught her to be strong.
I guess I need you baby
I make believe that you are here
It's the only way I see clear
You seem to move uneasy
She'd caught herself doing it at times. Acting like he was still there. Like he was just out, getting her some ice cream, taking Dawn to the movies. That he'd come back to her and they would work things out. They'd be together again. Everything would be good again. She could hold him in her arms again. He could offer her his strength.
And ever Time I try to fly, I fall
Without my wings I feel so small
I guess I need you baby
And every time I see you in my dreams
I see your face, you're haunting me
I guess I need you baby
There was no denying it anymore. She needed him. She always did. He was what held her together, if it weren't for him the last three years she could have hurt someone, killed someone. She might have even attempted to kill herself.
I may have made it rain
Please forgive me
My weakness caused you pain
Buffy fell to her knees. She couldn't take it anymore, she wanted to turn it off, stop the woman from reminding her. Reminding her of how weak she was. How horrible she was. How many times she pushed him away. Hurt him. Why? Weakness. Her's. fear.
At night I pray
That soon your face will fade away
She couldn't stop the tears from falling now, they fell and she couldn't stop them. There was to many. She thought of all the sleepless nights she forbid herself to close her eyes. Knowing that he was waiting behind her eyelids. The pain that awaited her in the morning.
All the nights she stayed up praying, begging, for something to ease the pain. She couldn't take it anymore. She hated how it felt. It was worse then ever before.
He was the only one who could make it feel better.
Buffy fell to the ground. Sobs racking violently threw her small body. Tears streaming down her cheeks. "Please." She whispered. "I… I need him."