fuck it just going to rant here k thanks.

On a day that I just can't particulary get through or I think okay just wait until 'x' happends but that 'x' does happen and it just makes you want to die because it acutally makes the whole living thing that much worse.

I don't usually call myself a damn drama queen but it just gets to me that on the day I feel like I might die due to my damn body going on strike the people around me start ganging up on me and it's really pathetic (but it has manage to irritate me something bad) and I can normally just brush that shit off but this. This, I can't really do...

Did you need example?

really?

No?

then fuck off, I am stressed out of my mind. I've been working all summer to pass these scholarship exams to join the best art academy that I've told like one person about, maybe two... umANYWAY, my older brother is a shit and won't stop making a MASSIVE deal out of something that's meaningless and will blame me for shit I don't control A.K.A the weather, take out food arriving 'late'. Shit like that. Not my fault I can acutally be friends with someone he can't stand that's his beef, get over it. It's not like I get Izuku to hang out at our house anyway. Just because he'd have a fit and it's not worth it.

Then I have mother, a woman that has a fuse as short as-a fuse that is none existint, she takes on too much work and will fight EVERYTHING.

She will come home or I would and I'd immedately get a 'WHAT THE FUCK IS-' or the silent treatment. Either way not helpful when all I really need is help sorting my life out but fuck it. This is just a rant I have kept this a secret but sometimes it just seems like she only doesn't know because she won't have an actual conversation with me.

However, the reality is that talking to mother is like talking to a fucking wall or it just starts an arguMENT I DON'T FUCKING WANT OR NEED.

and chill.

Tomorrow morning is the exam. I'm at home, in my room, lying on my back trying to calm down before I meet Theo (Shoto's younger brother) baku's back at school, I know I should just tell my folks but I'm just so done.

I couldn't muster the effort even if I tried. The care's just gone. I stopped eating my mother's food after she said one too many comments. A joke or not I do care about how I look. My body can become complete fire and it burns everything but doesn't even come close to how much my mother's roasts burns. being called 'jelly' 'cow' and 'pig' all in the same night followed by my 'defence', shall we call it, then smash plates (mother)and a final argument ultimately boiling down to some almost self-mutilation with my quirk in the heat of the moment (yes I did clean up after) somewhere in early july. Summer fun.

This damn summer has been weird. It was fun, I started hanging out with Theo, his name is Phonix but I can't run up yelling it without cracking up and he seems to like the nickname. He can be quiet but he's a cool guy. We started being friends ages ago but we go to different schools so never normally meet up so we hung out nearly all summer but there was a week of theo visiting Shoto and his mother because, I assume daddy issues but Theo didn't put it so bluntly. It was heavily implied.

So it wasn't that bad but then againURG FUCK ITS TOMORROW feeling is sinking in. I turn to my bedside clock. 18:23.

I need to go I said I'd meet Theo at 7 and stay at his tonight as he promised to get me up in time for tomorrow. #bestfriendsgoals

I got up, looked in the mirror

That'll do.

and I left.

I did a chapter. be proud of me