It had been two years since I had talked to her. Since I let her slip right through my fingers, just when she needed me most. I certainly didn't do it on purpose. Life just got so busy, and before I knew it, she wouldn't answer her phone anymore. Now she was looking me in the eyes. Not really her, but her picture. I tried to look away from my laptop, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from hers. She looked good, but I could see the pain in her eyes. Her profile was new on facebook. I knew this only because I had looked for her everyday for the past year. My fingers clicked to send a friend request before I could stop them. Within seconds I received a message at the bottom of my computer screen, saying my request was accepted. It was 4am, why would she be up? I couldn't stop myself from looking in the chat box. The little circle next to her name was green. She was online.

Hey Sugar, how are ya? Why did I hit enter?

Hey, it's been a long time! She typed back. I couldn't believe she was talking to me.
Seems you still keep your late hours. I smiled at her message. My sleeping time was crazy, she knew that all too well.

Yeah, unfortunately. I typed.

You look good, I watch you a lot. She typed back.
I've tried to find you on here, but can only find your fan page.

Yeah, I keep my personal page hidden. There are some crazies out there. I wanted to delete that word as soon as I hit enter.

I understand that. lol She typed back. I breathed a sigh of relief.

I miss you. Where are you at now? I asked.

Florida. I'm working at a bar in Tampa. She replied.

WOW! Florida is a big change from Ohio. I said.

I needed a change. Things are going really good for me right now.

I've looked at your pictures on here. You look really good.

Thanks. She typed. I could picture her cheeks flushed at my compliment and I couldn't help but smile. I wanted to ask her what was wrong, why her eyes were so sad, but I refrained, not wanting to push her away when I had just found her.

What made you move to Florida? I asked.

Just needed a change. Got out of a bad relationship, and thought it would be best to get away.

Not another bad relationship. I didn't know how she had made it through the ones she had been through. She was a magnet for pain and punishment. Maybe that was why I was drawn to her. I was her savior at one point in her life. I needed her as much as she needed me. She kept me grounded, and I desperately needed that again. My head had been all over lately. And I needed to come back down to earth. I was a mess mentally and emotionally. I missed my home in South Africa, even though I had been in the US for over four years. I missed my family. Something she always understood. Her mom had died when she was young, and she bounced around between family members, because her dad hadn't wanted anything to do with her.

Are you seeing anyone now? Why did I ask her that? What was wrong with me?

Not really. I've had a few dates, but nothing serious. You? Had she really asked about my personal life? She must have just been being nice.

Not really. You know how it is when I'm on the road. Of course she did, that's why I had lost her in the first place.

Yeah, I understand. How's your elbow? I saw when you got hurt. I was worried. I smiled, she still worried about me.

No need to worry your beautiful self, Sugar. I'm a tough guy. I could again see her cheeks flush.

I know you are, but I still worry. How's your family? When's the last time you saw them? She knew me too well.

How'd you know I was missing them?

I could tell. You always miss them.

I never did when I was with you. Why did I keep typing things like that?
I really do miss you. I needed to stop myself before I made her run.

Where are you tonight? She asked. I was surprised that she even responded.

New York. Too far away, huh?

Yep.

I'll be home next week. How is it that you're in Tampa, and I haven't seen you? She knew I had my permanent home in Tampa. As permanent as I could get. My home consisted mostly of hotel rooms and arenas. But that was my life. The life I had worked so hard to get. The life I had chosen and left everything I knew to get it. That was my life.

I wasn't sure you were still in Florida.

You think we can get together? I knew I shouldn't have asked, but I missed her, and really wanted to see her in person.

I work a lot. But we can try. She replied.
When do you get back?

Wednesday night. Can I have your number? Then I can call you when I get home. Don't push it too far, I kept telling myself. I was surprised when her number popped up on the screen.
Thanks.

I need to get some sleep. And so do you, even though I know you won't. I could again picture her smile.
It was good chatting with you.

I'll call you soon. I said.

I hope so, PJ. Miss you too. With that she signed off line. I clicked on her photos and found one of her in a bikini. I clicked it and sat back in my chair staring at her perfect body. Her long, dark brown hair was pulled over one shoulder. It brought out her deep green eyes. Her tan skin made her ink pop, and I couldn't help but notice the new ink on the insides of her wrists. I frowned to myself knowing what she was hiding, but deep down I was hoping I was wrong about the sadness in her eyes. She deserved to be happy.