Merlin stretched and then carefully got out of bed. His body and head ached and had been for a few days. Now he had his own quarters as he was Court Sorcerer, he was not under Gaius's maternal care. He knew by now Gaius would be giving him herbs and making him rest more but at the moment Merlin had no time for either. His workload had tripled and he barely had the chance to remember what day it was. He slowly made his way over to the King and Queen's Quarters and was half way along the corridor before he remembered he'd promised Gaius to collect some comfy before work. For once the extra chore was a blessing maybe being outside would give him the chance to get rid of his headache at least.
He set off for the Darkling Woods taking his old herbs bag and a bacon sandwich one of the kitchen assistants had given to him. Clara in particular spoilt him rotten, a blonde girl with red cheeks she was forever palming stuff off onto him.
"We can't have our Court Sorcerer dying of hunger now can we?" she'd said to him that morning. In truth Merlin couldn't quite understand people's obession about his weight. He certainly didn't feel underfed he was just lanky in frame naturally. He let them fuss any way and took it all in good faith, it was certainly better than being viewed at with suspicion as he was in the early day of becoming Court Sorcerer.
He considered his life now how it had changed and he realised he was pretty much living the dream he'd always wanted. Yes the demands on his time never stopped, but at least people now knew who he was. There was no more hiding away or having to play the fool to cover himself. He was truly thankful for that. He had pretty much everything he desired, with the exception of one thing. He felt lonely.
He could never quite understand his loneliness. For a person who'd spent much of his time on his own now everything was out in the open he suddenly felt incomplete. He would watch his friends Arthur and Gwen now preparing for their first child and at times envy the fact that they had something extra somehow.
Suddenly Freya would come into his mind and once again a source of hopelessness would descend over him. Once more the fact that he couldn't save her would torment his mind. All his powers and yet he could do nothing to save the woman he loved. He questioned if he ever would find contentment in that respect? Or was he just meant even now to be on his own? Was he being punished for not saving Freya, at times it felt like it to him.
He sat down to have a brief rest and rested his aching head on a tree. The leaves were starting to fall and he could feel fragments of them falling around him as he sat. His eyes felt suddenly tired so he took a few minutes to close them and relax, until he briefly fell asleep
Every now and then he caught a scent on the wind, and he let it into his mind and inhaled. She was there standing before him, a smile on her face holding her hand out to him. Merlin smiled at her holding out his own hand to her and walked towards her. They met together and kissed and he breathed in her scent as if he was about to go under water. "Freya" he whispered. Suddenly he woke up with a jump, feeling not quite there he took a few moments to come round. She had been so clear in his mind that for a second Merlin had thought it was real. He realised it was the same dream he had on and off at certain times of the year. Mainly near the anniversary of her death, but that was months ago now, he would never understand dreams he thought to him sadly.
He sighed and got up deciding to go further into the forest to try and get some comfy. He walked off at a brisk pace noticing little as he moved on. Looking around he could see no comfy around. He sighed deciding in the end to use his senses to find it. He looked ahead intently and as his eyes turned golden he checked out the path ahead. No luck, so he changed direction coming to a clearing. As he walked into it he heard a current of birdsong which suddenly slowed down his mind. He stopped for a second to listen to the sound of nature around him.
At times he felt as though he could spend endless days like this instead of attending unending court business. But as Arthur's plans for a united Albion were steaming ahead Merlin knew he was needed in Camelot. After a few minutes he continued on his way. He stumbled through some trees before coming to a stream. Suddenly he realised just how thirsty he was and went towards it to get a drink.
As he crouched down by the stream he suddenly he heard a noise behind him. He turned to find a figure behind him dressed in a cloak.
"Sorry I didn't mean to alarm you." Merlin said trying to remain friendly.
The figure came closer until she was standing next to him, as she took off her hood she had a bright smile on her face.
"Hello Merlin I never thought I'd see you again."
"Sefa, I don't believe it." Merlin laughed. "what are you doing here, how are you?" all of a sudden Merlin had a thousand questions to ask the former maid of the Queen.
"I am well thank you. I am with the Druids who are nearby. When I had to leave Camelot I decided to go back to where I was at the beginning. Once my father died in the camp I decided to stay here." Sefa looked at Merlin closely. "It's so good to see you. I've often thought of you." She smiled.
There was a brief silence in which Sefa looked at Merlin more closely.
"Are you feeling alright?" she enquired concerned.
"Oh I'm just tired my days never seem to end. Always something to do things to attend to. I'm not sleeping too well at the moment." Merlin replied suddenly realising he did indeed feel rough.
"Come and sit down over here." Sefa said taking him by the arm gently and leading him to a broken tree in the shade. Sefa got him some water. "Drink this."
"Thank you." He said taking the skin from her giving her a weak smile.
Sefa sat next to him studying his face carefully. She was shocked by how lined his face was and how little colour there was. Tired and lined with worries she guessed to herself. This was the Merlin she knew back in Camelot, always worrying about others and putting himself last. It seemed things had not changed she thought to herself.
She remembered her time in Camelot and how attentive he always was to her, always helping her out when she needed it. Well maybe this was her chance to repay him for his kindness.
"I have some natural remedies in my bag, I would like to help you if you'll let me." She smiled at him.
"I'm not sure anything could at the moment." He smiled to her sadly. "But you can give it a try." He held out his hand to her she held it briefly giving it a little squeeze.
"You should learn to have more faith with the old healings Merlin." Sefa said.
"I'm always willing to learn." Merlin smiled suddenly curious.
Merlin watched her get some leaves out of her bag. She carefully put them on the ground and took out a Jasmine flower. She carefully plucked the centre into one of the leaves before carefully putting some water around and then let it dry in the sun for a few minutes. Then she took out a little box and opened it, taking a little powder and mixing it onto the leave. Merlin found himself relaxing as he watched Sefa work, he had forgotten what pretty brown eyes she had. He smiled at her.
"What?" Sefa asked smiling back.
"I just can't believe we have met again." Merlin said, "when you left I thought I'd never see you again."
"I always had hope that our paths would cross again. Right it's ready, put your head back and try and relax." Sefa said. She carefully put the mixture onto Merlin's face and gently rubbed it into his temples. Merlin was overcome by an aroma from the mixture.
"What's that smell?" he asked curiously.
"It's from the Jasmine flower, it encourages restfulness, cures sore eyes and depression helps to get you back onto your feet." Sefa smiled softly at him.
"So it will help make a new man out of me." Merlin smiled.
"I can't promise that." Sefa laughed, "but I guarantee you will feel better than you have been. I will give you some to take back to Camelot with you. So you can use it when you need to."
Merlin smiled feeling suddenly a lot more relaxed as he regarded her.
"I know what would help me, if you agreed to see me tomorrow night." He said arching an eyebrow at her.
"Merlin are you sure that is wise?" Sefa asked staring intently at him. "Anyway I thought you were too busy."
"I am always busy of course Arthur can find me tons of things to do." He laughed. "but seeing you suddenly like this, it's made me realise I should try and find some time for myself too."
Sefa sat back "I'm glad you have decided to do that, and yes I will meet you tomorrow. There's a lovely place I can show you, really peaceful and beautiful."
"That sounds really nice." Merlin said.
Sefa said "Just let me put a bit more ointment on." She carefully spread it over his face. Merlin closed his eyes as he smelt the scent and let the aroma take him over, he found himself relaxing as Sefa's finger gently rubbed on his weary bones.
"Who taught you to do this?" he asked curiously.
"My Grandmother, she was a healer of the old ways, always knew how to make you feel better. She had such soft fingers even though they were wrinkly and old, she could heal anyone." Sefa explanined
"I think you can." Merlin smiled "I already feel better."
"I'm glad you always worry about people all the time. You need to think about yourself Merlin." She said
Merlin smiled, "Oh I'm fine."
Sefa smiled and shook her head at him.
You will never change will you?" she said
"I suppose I've been serving people so long it just becomes habit, putting yourself second. It doesn't feel right any other way. If that makes any sense." He said.
"I think I know what you mean. But everyone needs some time to themselves Merlin. How is everything in Camelot?" she asked sitting next to him.
"Busy Arthur is a bundle of energy. Every bit of the day he needs to be doing something or giving you something to do." Merlin complained looking up at the sky.
"Despite everything you love it though." Sefa smiled noting that a little colour had started to come back into his face.
"I suppose I must do." He said giving her a thoughtful look. "What about you?" I was really sad to see you leave Camelot."
"I was sad to leave, but I needed to look after my father. He was never at ease with my decision to be in Camelot as you know. But I knew he was near the end, the Druids here were so kind to me, that I felt I wanted to give them something back, so I stayed." She smiled.
"Will you stay with the Druids?" he asked.
"I'm not sure, I would like a family one day." She said shyly "so I can't see myself staying here permanently. Maybe one day I will meet some one and go away with them."
"I'd like that too." Merlin agreed, a warm smile on his face.
For a brief moment they stared at each other saying nothing.
Merlin then remembered he had a meeting to attend and scurried up.
"Are you okay?" Sefa asked suddenly concerned.
"Sorry I've got a meeting I need to be at." Merlin grinned. "you will meet me tomorrow evening?" he asked.
"Yes I will meet you, try not to get too stressed and use the remedy I've gave you when you are feeling tired. It will help you." She smiled.
"I will and thank you I feel a lot brighter than before." He said.
"I'm glad I managed to help you then." Sefa said. "I'll see you here tomorrow evening."
She was about to walk away, but before she did Merlin leant over and kissed her cheek.
"Thank you." Merlin smiled before hurrying away.
Sefa watched him go revelling in the feel of his kiss, and smiling to herself she turned and returned to the Druid camp, feeling that her life had at last taken a turn for the better.