The Legato Song! -Sung by Legato Bluesummers with the assistance of Vash the Stampede
*sung to the tune of the 'Asshole' Song by Denis Leary*
I'm just evil bad dude with an evil-type job
I'm your average white-coat wearing slob
I like hotdogs and ice cream and marshmallow s'mores
I'll spill blood in your house, on the nice hardwood floor
No wife and no job, no kids and no car
Just a bad case of munchies, and a chocolate cigar
But sometimes that just ain't enough to keep a man like me interested
(Oh no) No Way (Uh-uh)
No, I've gotta go out and have fun
At someone else's expense
(Oh yeah) Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
I'll sit eating calmly my striped candy-cane
While people behind me are going insane
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's Legato, mad Legato)
I sit at the counter, eating eggs and some meat
While people are falling dead at my feet
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's Legato, mad Legato)
Sometimes I hunt and eat red licorice laces
While unknowing peoples are stuffing their faces
I'm Legato (He's Legato, mad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's the badass Legato)
Maybe I shouldn't be singing this song
Munching and chewing and carrying on
Maybe Vash is right when he tells me I'm wrong
Naaaah!
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad asshole)
I'm Legato (He's the pot-smokin' Legato)
[Spoken]
You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get myself Cloud Strife's motorcycle from Final Fantasy 7, jet black with chrome plated accessories and a leather seat, yeah! And I'm gonna drive around in that baby at 215mph getting one mile per gallon, sucking down quarter pounder cheese burgers from McDonald's in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers and when I'm done sucking down those grease ball burgers, I'm gonna find the nearest desert saloon and then I'm gonna kill everyone inside and there ain't a God damned thing anybody can do about it. You know why? Because I can conrtol minds, that's why.
[Spoken]
Two words. Mind fucking control, okay?! Vash, Woolwood, the 2 girls - they can have all the Love and Peace they want. They can have a big Love and Peace cake-walk right through the middle of the town square and it won't make a lick of difference because I control minds, okay?! Vash is not wrong - he's stupid. And as soon as we get rid of him we're gonna destory humanity 'cause we're pretty pissed off. You know why? Have you ever waited in line for burgers behind a girl scout troop? Well multiple that by 15-million times, that's how pissed off we're gonna be. I'm gonna get Dominique and Millions Knives...
(Hey)
and Zazie the Beast
(Hey)
and Midvalley the Whore
(Hey)
And a case of Ben & Jerry's and drive down to May City...
(Hey, you know you really are an asshole)
Why don't you just shut-up and sing the song Vash!
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's the pot-smokin' Legato)
L-E-G-A-T-O Everybody! L-E-G-A-T-O
[Barking]
Arf Arf Arf Arf Arf Arf Arf
Fung achng tum a fung tum a fling chum
Oooh Oooh
[Spoken]
I'm Legato and I'm proud of it!
*sung to the tune of the 'Asshole' Song by Denis Leary*
I'm just evil bad dude with an evil-type job
I'm your average white-coat wearing slob
I like hotdogs and ice cream and marshmallow s'mores
I'll spill blood in your house, on the nice hardwood floor
No wife and no job, no kids and no car
Just a bad case of munchies, and a chocolate cigar
But sometimes that just ain't enough to keep a man like me interested
(Oh no) No Way (Uh-uh)
No, I've gotta go out and have fun
At someone else's expense
(Oh yeah) Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
I'll sit eating calmly my striped candy-cane
While people behind me are going insane
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's Legato, mad Legato)
I sit at the counter, eating eggs and some meat
While people are falling dead at my feet
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's Legato, mad Legato)
Sometimes I hunt and eat red licorice laces
While unknowing peoples are stuffing their faces
I'm Legato (He's Legato, mad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's the badass Legato)
Maybe I shouldn't be singing this song
Munching and chewing and carrying on
Maybe Vash is right when he tells me I'm wrong
Naaaah!
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad asshole)
I'm Legato (He's the pot-smokin' Legato)
[Spoken]
You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get myself Cloud Strife's motorcycle from Final Fantasy 7, jet black with chrome plated accessories and a leather seat, yeah! And I'm gonna drive around in that baby at 215mph getting one mile per gallon, sucking down quarter pounder cheese burgers from McDonald's in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers and when I'm done sucking down those grease ball burgers, I'm gonna find the nearest desert saloon and then I'm gonna kill everyone inside and there ain't a God damned thing anybody can do about it. You know why? Because I can conrtol minds, that's why.
[Spoken]
Two words. Mind fucking control, okay?! Vash, Woolwood, the 2 girls - they can have all the Love and Peace they want. They can have a big Love and Peace cake-walk right through the middle of the town square and it won't make a lick of difference because I control minds, okay?! Vash is not wrong - he's stupid. And as soon as we get rid of him we're gonna destory humanity 'cause we're pretty pissed off. You know why? Have you ever waited in line for burgers behind a girl scout troop? Well multiple that by 15-million times, that's how pissed off we're gonna be. I'm gonna get Dominique and Millions Knives...
(Hey)
and Zazie the Beast
(Hey)
and Midvalley the Whore
(Hey)
And a case of Ben & Jerry's and drive down to May City...
(Hey, you know you really are an asshole)
Why don't you just shut-up and sing the song Vash!
I'm Legato (He's Legato, bad Legato)
I'm Legato (He's the pot-smokin' Legato)
L-E-G-A-T-O Everybody! L-E-G-A-T-O
[Barking]
Arf Arf Arf Arf Arf Arf Arf
Fung achng tum a fung tum a fling chum
Oooh Oooh
[Spoken]
I'm Legato and I'm proud of it!