I'm back! With you guys is the first chapter of Hanging On, the last installment in the No Matter What series that I so gladly wrote. I want to thank all the people that reviewed the last chapter of Still Fighting. I'm posting this a week earlier than I said I would, I know, I'm just that awesome ;). Hope you guys like it.

Disclaimer: If I owned the Hunger Games, I would know Sam Claflin, and sadly I don't know Sam Claflin… I wish I knew Sam Claflin… So, no, I don't own the Hunger Games, the owner is the amazing Suzanne Collins, she does know Sam Claflin.

Miss you:

Johanna's POV

Apparently, I've been so bored in 13 that I had nothing better to do than to accompany Princess Katniss to district 12. I should explain the ''Princess'' comment. Everybody is trying to get the little princess here to take the fucking job as Mockingjay. Apparently she's going ''crazy'' and she has a lot of ''issues''. I really want to tell her doctors that stupidity is not an issue. I dislike Katniss, just in case you couldn't tell. Everybody seems to pity her and understand her and say she's been through a lot. Please, her life is practically a fairy tale. She lost her father when she was 11? Big deal, I lost mine when I was 8. She was sent into the Hunger games at age 16? My best friend was sent at age 14 and I was sent at 16. Her hometown was destroyed when she was 17? My entire family and friends were murdered by the Capitol after I refused to be a prostitute, yes, when I was 17. They captured her fake boyfriend?... I won't get into that. Shit… I'm getting angrier, my therapist told me to keep my emotions in check. I do a trick she taught me, in which I start organizing facts about my life, going from the simplest to the most complicated parts of it.

My name is Johanna Mason. I'm from district 7. I'm 20 years old. I'll turn 21 in a couple months, on November 17th. 10 days before Nike turns 22. Nike… He was captured by the Capitol. They're probably torturing him. Maybe he's dead already…

Damn it! The therapist told me to steer clear of the Nike subject. It's not easy task. I miss him more than I'd like to admit. I've had more nightmares in this past month more times than I can count. It's selfish for me to complain, they rescued ME. It's Nike the one that got the worst of it. Maybe that's why I'm so angry all the time, he shouldn't have gotten the worst. He shouldn't have been in the arena in the first place. Stupid, noble asshole… I wish he were here. It doesn't help that his ring is on the ring finger of my left hand. I don't know why I decided to use it as if I were Nike's fiancée, but it just felt right. I spin it in my finger and think about him. His great smile, his hair -that in my opinion its way too short, almost like a soldier-, his amazing green eyes, his strong arms, his abs…

Gale's voice asking Katniss if he should go down to 12 with her sets me off my mental view of Nike (damn, Nike's good looking). Gale is a nice guy, not to mention he's really handsome. Besides, he saved around of 800 people the day the Capitol bombarded 12. That's a pretty impressive accomplishment if you ask me. I dislike him too. I don't know if I just dislike everything since Nike was captured or maybe I dislike him because he flirted with me when I first met him. Then he goes and claims he loves Katniss just as much, maybe more than Peeta does. Peeta was also captured. Princess here has been pretty upset about that, too. It annoys me that Katniss might go to Gale for comfort. Yes, I know they have history together and I know he's good looking and nice, but Peeta doesn't deserve that. Peeta deserves someone who misses him and thinks about him all the time. Like I am with Nike right now.

Nike, Nike, Nike, Nike… That's all I can think about. It's been all I've thought about since I got to 13. I keep having these random flashbacks about things I've gone through with him. And right after I have them I realize just how much I need him in my life. That's usually when the crying starts. I'm pathetic and weak. Worst of all, the only other time I felt so bad about myself, guess who was there to help me?

I'm back at my house after working in the woods with Nike. I pour myself a glass of scotch and I drink it in my living room. I refused to be a prostitute for the Capitol 3 weeks ago, Snow swore that my decision would have consequences, but nothing has happened. I don't know if nothing will happen, or if he just wants me to think me and my family are safe. It's probably the latter. It worries me, not because of my own safety; I lost that long ago, but because of Alex and my mom.

The doorbell rings and I stand up and walk to the door. I open it, expecting mom and Alex to be back from the paper factory. Instead, standing in there is a peacekeeper, looking glum. ''Miss Johanna Mason?'' he asks, even though he obviously knows it's me. ''I must inform you some bad news. Your mother, Lily Mason and your brother, Alex Mason, have passed away in a miscarriage in the paper factories. We're terribly sorry''

I stand there with a shocked look on my face as the peacekeeper apologizes and apologizes over and over again before leaving. I sit back down in my place in the couch, like I was before the peacekeeper came. It happened. He killed them. Snow killed them. They're dead. I'm not crying, but I've never felt so much pain. Not even 5 minutes later somebody opens the door. It's Nike. His short hair is wet and his t-shirt is backwards. He was probably in the shower when he found out and he came right here. He walks quickly towards me, sits beside me and hugs me tightly.

''They're gone'' I tell him as I hug him back, and my tears start to run down my face for the first time, probably since my dad died ''They're gone!'' I shout this time.

''I know'' he says. He doesn't try to comfort me, he knows how it feels, when you lose someone so close to you, you don't want to hear people say 'I'm sorry for your loss' you just want them to understand, and he does.

''It's my fault, Nike'' I say gripping him tighter ''I killed them, they're dead because of me. It's my fault!''

''No it's not'' he says and he pulls me away just enough so I have to look into his bright green eyes ''You did nothing wrong, Johanna, you hear me? Nothing. You're perfect. Everything you do and everything you are is perfect, the only ones to blame are the Capitol. I won't ever let you blame yourself for this.''

I hug him again and I cry into his shoulder. I don't know how long he stays with me, but I don't want him to go. Not now.

And definitely not now either. ''Katniss, come out of the house. We need to go back to District 13'' Gale says in his microphone.

''Oh, bummer'' I say sarcastically, glad that something distracted me from my gloomy thoughts. ''Is our little trip over, so soon?''

''It's such a shame, I was having such a good time with you'' Gale says, just as sarcastically as me. I think he dislikes me too. I did reject him pretty rudely, but can you blame me? I had just found out about Nike.

''Aw'' I say ''I wasn't. I don't really like womanizers''

Nike's POV

I open my eyes. I'm back in my jail cell. I don't remember falling asleep, so I must've passed out during torture again. It's not the first time it happens, and I doubt it'll be the last. I have a feeling that their torture methods will change soon, because they're not getting anything out of me. I don't even acknowledge knowing about the rebellion. That's the first step though, if I acknowledge it, that's when the torture will get worse, if possible.

I stand up. My body feels sore, and it hurts to move it or pretty much force it to do anything. I don't think I understand why. It's true that I've been experiencing excruciating pain almost every day since they captured me, and that was weeks ago, but it's more mental than physical. I'm not even sure if they actually hurt me at all, they just want me to feel the pain, without the risk of me dying. So far, so good.

Judging by the light streaming from my little window, it is early morning. That probably means I was unconscious for about 6 or 7 hours. That means I still have around an hour before the peacekeepers drag me to the torture room again. I hold a pipe that hangs horizontally from the ceiling with both hands and I lift myself. My arms tremble as I try my best to do pull ups. It hurts, my back and my arms ache as I lift myself up, but I need to do it. I need to keep myself strong. If I'm weak, then people get hurt. People close to me, and I can't let that happen. Ever. So I do pull ups. After 9 my arms are shaking and as I pull myself up again, I lose my grip on the bars, fall and hit my back against the opposite wall.

''Fuck!'' I shout as I take my head in my hands. I could do 50 before I was captured. I need to go again or do something. I can't just sit here, if I don't keep myself occupied I start to think, and if I think I'll get depressed. I lay on the ground and I begin doing sit ups. One, two, three… and so on.

I'm clearly not thinking straight. If I were I would listen to the pain I go through whenever I move and just stop with this exercising. Why am I doing this? Oh right, so I don't think. I think anyway.

''Let me in!'' I shout ''Let me in! I need to see her, let me in!''

Blight is holding me back and the doctors keep the doors closed. Damn, Blight is strong. ''Let me go, Blight! I need to see her, please!'' I beg struggling against Blight's grasp.

''I'm sorry, we can't allow that, Mr. Midas'' the doctor says as he locks the door with his keys ''She just got out of surgery, nobody is allowed to see her. But don't worry, she's fine''

''Please! Doctor, I'm begging you, just let me see her'' I beg again ''I won't try anything stupid, I swear''

''We can't allow that, you'll just have to wait'' he repeats.

''C'mon, boy'' Blight says and drags me down the hallway to my room.

My dreams are filled with nightmares that night. This shouldn't be happening, Johanna just got out of the games! I should be allowed to be with her! I wake up at around 3am. Fuck. I need to see her. Just see her, just to make sure she's alive, that she's breathing and here. I get out of bed and run down the hallway towards the elevator. I don't even mind that I'm only wearing shorts, or that the hallway might be guarded. I just need to see her. If the damn elevator could come already… I'm shocked when the doors of the elevator slide open, and there she is. Johanna. She looks half asleep, thin, her hair is a mess and she's just wearing a medical gown. I don't think she has ever looked more gorgeous.

We're both quiet for a moment, until her face breaks into a huge grin and she tackles me into the biggest hug ever, she holds me by the neck and she even wraps her legs around my waist. For a second I'm about to fall down, but I regain my balance and I hug her back tightly.

''Hi'' she says in my ear.

I chuckle ''Hey'' I tell her and I squeeze her even tighter against me. We are so close I can feel her heartbeat against my bare chest and her breathing against my neck. Yep, she's definitely alive and I'm definitely happy.

One hundred. I stop. I'm breathing heavily, my stomach aches, like if I had done ten thousand sit ups instead of a hundred. I cover my face with my hands. I wish I could at least know where she is. Was she captured? Did the people from 13 save her from the arena? Is the rebellion still going on, or did the Capitol already put a stop to it and they just want me to confess so they can publicly kill me? I know none of this, and they don't want to answer any of my questions. I miss Johanna so bad…

Someone opens the jail cell and dumps a bucket of freezing water on top of me. ''Get up pretty boy!'' the peacekeeper shouts and 2 other guys lift me by the arms until I'm standing up ''It's time for your daily interrogation, and try not to pass out this time, will you?'' he says with an evil grin. The 2 other peacekeepers start dragging me towards the interrogation room. I know better than to try and fight them off, the only thing I can do is prepare myself for the pain, like I've done all these days.

Yay! Another chapter done! I loved writing this! It was so much fun :). I hope you enjoyed it too. Just so you guys know, not all chapters will be half Nike, half Johanna, sometimes it'll be just one of them, I'm not sure, I don't have everything planned yet. Also, that thing I said in Johanna's POV, about Gale being a womanizer, well I think he completely is. Don't get me wrong, I like Gale, but I never thought he loved Katniss and in Mockingjay when he said he kissed girls all the time, well I thought that was kind of womanizer-like. I'm rambling…

Can I confess something? I finished this chapter a week ago, but I decided not to post it because I'm mean :D. If you want to complain about how mean I am, then maybe you could review? Alright cool! I might not post anything next week, because I have a super important exam, but I'll try. See you guys then :). Wow, I just realized all my first chapters have at least one flashback… Oh, well ;).