WARNING !
This story includes very sensitive subjects linked to pregnancy that could be triggers for some people. You have been warned
Author's note: I tried to write this as seriously as I could. To be totally honest, I felt like I was Stephen King writing Carrie! I've cringed writing many parts but I wanted to make this as believable and as serious as possible. Due to some of the issues that come up in this story, I felt I could not take it lightly as that would mean the risk of offending readers. If you are offended by anything in this story I apologise entirely, though I doubt you will be.
-V
IMPORTANT: In this story, Ma'die Kusse has only four members instead of five, and the Gazette boys keep the stage names they use to today. Only Jekyll, who was the vocalist of Ma'die Kusse and now in ELM, is being known by his stage name of the time; Tetora
Ruki looked at the little bit of red liquid staining his fingers. His breathing became heavy and strained as horror shot through his body. It shouldn't be happening. Not this time. He had a plan- he had two plans. Tell Kai and hope he believes and understands or quit the band through a phone call and run for his fucking life. But no. None of that was needed now. He needed one thing-
That one thing entered the bathroom with suspicion.
"Ruki?" Reita called "Dude you've been in here a while. You okay?"
Ruki swallowed hard before quickly making himself decent.
"Ru?"
"Reita" the vocalist's voice was serious as he sternly left the bathroom cubicle and headed straight to his friend. He held his hand up in front of his blonde's face "I need you to get me to a hospital. Now"
"Ru…" whispered the wide eyed Reita.
The bassist's breath caught his own throat as stared at his poor friend, who was now washing the blood from his hands.
"Are you okay?" was all Reita could think of to ask.
"What the fuck do you think?" Ruki scowled as shook the water from his hands.
The bassist swallowed "Are you in pain?"
"I have really bad cramps that stretch round my middle and up my spin. My insides are currently peeling away a dead thing from inside of me. No, I'm not in fucking pain" the vocalist growled before leaning against the wall, taking deep breaths.
As the horrid pain continued and his head began to feel heavy , Ruki was reminded of a memory he had tried to forget. That memory seemed more vivid and clear when the same writhed through his body.
It was two years ago. Back then, Ruki was a drummer for a band called Ma'die Kusse, having not yet even attempted vocals. His band began playing regularly at a club called Midori Ai. Playing at the same place was a band named Mareydi+creia. This was how Ruki met the man that became the love of his life and his biggest mistake. He was Kai and it still is. Ruki's band would play after Kai's, so during the 10 minute break between their performances, the two boys started talking. It didn't take long for everything to move forward- way too forward for Ruki.
After a gig in early-mid May, Kai hung back after his gig to wait for Ruki. The two planned to just get drinks at the bar in Midori Ai but the night took an unexpected turn. With them both being intoxicated, the remaining memories of the night were foggy, but obviousness of what they had done was not. Ruki was horrified and humiliated the next morning as fear took over him. The frightening thought went through Ruki's head-
'If Kai remembers what happened… He'll think I'm a freak! 'How did I have straight sex with a 19 year old boy?' he'll think. He'll tell and they'll all know… They'll all know- Only Reita is supposed to know!'
Ruki got lucky twice- sex and a safely kept secret. Strangely, it hadn't occurred to Kai that their sexual encounter had been 'normal' due to being so drunk. All he knew the next morning was that he had grown an attachment to Ruki in that one night. The drummers made themselves an item and life carried out as normal. Sadly, this wasn't to last.
Ruki's little curse had struck. The then 19 year old boy was born a hermaphrodite with both sexual organs fully working to a substantial rate. From birth, his parents raised him as a boy, as suggested by his doctor. After many years of hormone injections, cat scans and various medications, Ruki reached his teens feeling comfortable as a boy. This all changed when he turned 15. The flow of blood is a curse upon women but also the wonderful moment that nature welcomes them to womanhood. For a hermaphrodite that claimed their self as a boy, it was nothing but a tragedy. No precautions were taken for the women's risk as Ruki had relieved his parents of worries by saying he was straight. This wasn't completely the truth, but Ruki had forced himself to keep self-control.
Until that drunken night.
And the Eve's curse to bleed until a seed is sewn was set. When his date was missed, Ruki quickly began to worry. He needed to talk to someone. Not Kai, not his parents, not a doctor… Reita it was.
Reita, who was the bassist for Ma'die Kusse, had known Ruki since they were toddlers. Somewhere along the line, Ruki had explained to his friend about his 'difference'. The information of it came in small doses as Ruki slowly opened up to his friend. This was good for Reita as it allowed him to adjust to the idea. He had always worried for his friend though.
And Reita was a lot more than worried when Ruki explained his fear.
"That's impossible!" Reita exclaimed, staring in horror at his friend who paced back and forth the bassist's room agitatedly.
"It's not though, that's the thing! Rei, what am I going to do?" Ruki panicked, his steps getting quicker as he dag his nails into his scalp.
"I don't know, er…" Reita wracked his brains "Mother's intuition! Girl's say they no they're having a kid because they get mother's-"
"ARE YOU TAKING FUCKING PISS?!" Ruki yelled, turning his icy stare straight to Reita who jumped and shuffled back on his bed, away from his friend.
"N-no! I'm being serious! Girls-"
"I'm not a girl!"
"Who's the father?"
"What?" Ruki spat viciously
"Who is the father?"
Ruki froze, his eyes turning blank "It doesn't matter-"
"Ruki-"
"It doesn't matter" the drummer hissed.
The conversation, of course, was stressful and difficult for both boys. Finally, the obvious decision was made, and Reita ended up saving Ruki's the embarrassment of buying such an item.
"You're older! You buy it!"
"What the hell has that got to do with anything?! It's for you!"
"But I'm younger!"
"19 year old's can buy fucking pregnancy tests Ruki!"
"You're older!"
"Oh, for love of god…"
30 minutes later, Reita had returned from the nearby store and was sitting alone in his bedroom, clicking his badly chewed nails against each other for entertainment. His PS game was paused on the television as focusing seemed too difficult at the time. He worried about his friend too much to enjoy games. Never had he thought he would ever be in this situation; at least not at this age. He imaged it being with a girl and it being a joyous thing. But no, it was everything opposite. Reita jumped as Ruki gently entered the room with a hanging head. He closed the door and slowly lifted his head to reveal his pale face. The poisonous words ran from his lips.
"I'm pregnant"
And it all began. Ruki hid the secret from everyone, including his parents and Kai. Only Reita knew and it was the way it would stay for four months. The bassist would many times remind his friend that he could not just ignore it and hope it would go away. He tried to make his friend face the facts but Ruki's determination was too strong for a while.
Ruki made very little attempt to work out what to do. He didn't know what to do. He couldn't decide between what options he did have.
Ruki was 5 months gone when he made decided what he would do. His plan had been to ask Kai to hang back after the gig to talk. Ruki would finally admit everything to Kai, he'd even give him proof if he needed it, and then, no matter what happened with Kai, he'd go home and tell his parents.
Ruki drew on the long thin eyebrows, finishing his make-up. He sat back to look at himself with satisfaction. He was considerably happy with his appearance that day. His purple hair was back combed and spiked up, his make-up perfect, his contact lenses in, the only thing he didn't like was the baggy dress-like top he had started wearing. He had to, He's put on weight round his middle and hearing Tetora, his vocalist, making fat jokes at him was the last thing he needed. The drummer squeezed his eyes shut and dug his nails into his hips as an uncomfortable feeling clawed his insides.
"You alright?" asked Uruha, coming to stand next to his friend, fiddling with his heavy earrings.
"Yeah" Ruki breathed "Fine, just got cramp-"
"You must eat too much salt" Uruha smirked "That's what they see isn't it? Too much salt causes cramps?"
"Something like that" Ruki grinned, checking the time on his watch "Kai will be off stage in a second. I'm gunna go catch him before he hurries off-"
"Very close aren't you" commented the red haired Tetora, who sat on the dresser with his leather-clad legs swinging freely "A bit too close, may I say" he winked at Ruki with a cheeky smile.
"It's not like that"
"Course. Course. Whatever you say, deary"
The drummer rolled his eyes and ran out the dressing room in a flash. Tetora wasn't a dreadful person, but one can have enough of his constant teasing. With luck, Ruki's eyes first set on Kai walking towards him down the corridor.
"Kai!" He called, plucking up all his bravery "Can I talk to-"
"Not now Ru" Kai grabbed Ruki by the shoulders and forced a unromantic kiss upon him "I've got to hurry home. I'll speak to you tomorrow" he rushed out before running up the corridor
"But Kai, it's important!"
"Tell me tomorrow!" Echoed Kai's call
"But…" Ruki's voice drowned in his throat as Kai left the building, still in costume.
Ruki sighed heavily, leaning against the wall sadly, one hand wondering to his middle subconsciously. Ruki jolted forward as a massive electric feeling of agony ran through his middle. He gritted his teeth and held his breath, his head shaking as his entire body tensed up. The drummer pushed himself off the wall and stumbled to the nearest bathroom, running into a cubicle before puking horridly. Five minutes later, the puking had stopped and Ruki rested himself against the wall. The pain continued, tearing it's was up his spine and making his eyes sting. With agonic pain, his leather jeans suddenly felt too right on his mid rift. Without hesitation, Ruki ripped them off and abandoned them on the china floor. Then, something caught his eyes. The red stain was like a fire alarm in Ruki's head. His fingers nervously stroked the material before turning to reveal the red stained tips. Ruki looked at the blood on his two fingers.
"Fuck" he whispered in a shaky voice "Please god no…" the drummer's voice cracked as the pain in his spine grew "God please no, not like this, not now-"
"RukI!" Tetora bewllowed from outside the bathroom "Stop talking to yourself and get the fuck to your drum set!"
Ruki swallowed hard "Kay…"
He wiped his hands on a tissue to rid himself of some of the blood, before he was interrupted once again by the door opening.
"Ruki…" came the worried voice of Reita "Are you okay?"
"Yeah fine" he flushed the chain and headed out the cubicle and to the sink, giving Reita a grin on his way. He quickly began to scrub the red from his finger tips, hoping Reita wouldn't notice.
"You look like shit…"
"Thanks man"
Ruki winced again, but the pain was beginning to die down. The drummer thanked the heaven's for it's timing. The two musicians hurried out of the bathroom and to the stage, the two other members of Ma'die Kusse seconds ahead. Ruki whizzed to his drum kit, spinning round on the chair for a moment before looking out at the beautiful audience. The crowd cheered the band's name appreciatively, warming the hearts of the four boys who had taken the stage.
"Hello beautiful people!" Tetora shouted into the mic "How are you all today my pretties?"
The crowd cheered back.
"Good. Have you missed us?"
"Yes!" shouted the crowd, followed by some female squeals.
"We've missed you" Tetora grinned, blowing a kiss at the crowd.
He took a step back laughing to himself and readjusting his white coat. He pointed at Uruha before announcing excitedly-
"URUHA!"
The guitarist smiled at the crowd, bowing politely as they welcomed him. The crowd cheered as Tetora swung to point the opposite way.
"Reita!"
As the crowd screams, Reita bowed modestly. Tetora turned his back to the crowd and pointed at Ruki, giving him a reassuring smile as he cheered out.
"RUKI-CHAN!"
The drummer grinned, beating a beat on his drum set as the crowd yelped for him.
"And I'm… Teh-Toooor-RAH!"
The band began to play before Tetora could finish his introduction. Ma'die Kusse's vocalist and two guitarists jumped about the stage cheerfully, dancing together as they played and Tetora sang in his strange, operatic voice. At the back, Ruki was putting the most effort in. The pain had returned and was only growing worse. There was no sickness time, just pure agony like a monster was ripping his insides cruelly. He swallowed hard, trying his best to focus on drumming rather than the pain. The claws inside him multiplied, pulling, tugging, twisting his throbbing organs. Ruki began to feel his arms getting heavy, making his drumming lazy and losing his rhythm. His eye sight began to blur but he managed to make out Uruha turning round and giving him a worried look but little else. His spine suddenly refused to support his body, his eyes refused to see and his mind became cloudy as his insides tore apart at last. Ruki collapsed head first onto his drum kit with a loud bang, his cymbals crashing with him. The weight of the cymbals caused Ruki's limp body to slide sideways, finally becoming still on the black stage floor. The drummer's band members abandoned their places and rushed over in a flash, panic stricken and confused.
"RUKI!" Uruha was first to his friend's side, desperately shaking him and pleading him to wake up.
Tetora kicked Uruha out the way harshly and threw the heavy cymbals off the drummer's still body and rolled him over on to his back. He placed his hand on Ruki's forehead, his ear to his friend's chest.
"Is he okay?" Reita crouched by Tetora's side.
Once sure of a conclusion, Tetora sat up "He's breathing but he feels very hot. Feel-" The singer placed the bassist's hand on Ruki's forehead.
"He's boiling up!"
"What do we do?" Uruha stuttered, biting his nails. He was never good in these situations.
"Just get him off stage. The lights are probably doing fuck all for him" Tetora demanded like a true leader before ordering Reita to carry the purple haired boy.
The bassist did as he was told, rushing to scoop Ruki up into his arms and hurry off stage with the others, leaving the confused crowd to be comforted by the Midori Ai's entertainment host. Uruha ran ahead to get the door for the others, while Jekyll, jogged next to Reita's side, keeping one eye on Ruki the entire time. Uruha closed the door behind them, before looking round the room for some kind of enlightenment to what they should do now.
"Uru-" Tetora grabbed his attention "Grab my jumper." Uruha jumped to action without questions "We'll use it as a pillow. Reita, you lay him flat out on the floor with his head on my jumper"
As the boys did as they were told, a small groan leaked from Ruki's lips.
"Is he awake?" Uruha double checked
"Waking up. He might be okay now, you never know-"
"He was complaining about a cramp in his hip" Uruha announced.
Reita flinched.
"Do you think that has anything to do with it?" the guitarist swallowed, looking down at his friend, who was still but moaning lightly every now and then
"I dunno. I'm a singer not a doctor!" Tetora scoffed, rolling his eyes before kneeling down to Ruki and resting his hand on his forehead again "He's still hot."
"A fever maybe? He'll probably be fine if he sleeps" Uruha shrugged, sitting down on the opposite side of Ruki's body to Tetora.
Ruki finally moved, grimacing and rolling on to his side, digging his nails into his slightly swollen stomach as he did so.
"You alright, dude?" Tetora asked a little too calmly.
"No" grunted the drummer.
Ruki groaned, clutching his stomach harder and curling up tight in a ball.
"Ruki, what's wrong?!" panicked a frantic Uruha.
Through gritted teeth and great difficulty, Ruki growled out "Let me speak to Reita" he cringed "alone"
Tetora and Uruha exchanged worried glances, before unwillingly leaving to room the wait outside. Reita crawled closer to his friend. He swallowed hard before he spoke.
"Do you think it's the baby-"
"Reita" Ruki spat "something is really wrong. It hurts. I-i-I'm bleeding-"
"Bleeding?!" Reita choked "W-where?!"
"Don't worry about where! You've got to get me to a doctor, please! Rei-" Ruki grabbed on to his friend's sleeve and held on tightly "I don't admit this often so for fucks sake know I truly mean it, but I'm scared, Rei. I'm really scared. Please. Just get me out of here."
Reita gulped down an argument and quickly got to work on lifting the drummer up in his arm's bridal style. Ruki hissed but didn't complain, instead helping by reaching to open the door for them. Tetora and Uruha were waiting worried outside, wide eyed as they saw the pair.
"What's going on?" Tetora muttered, his eyes looking Reita up and down.
"I'm driving Ruki the hospital." Reita barged passed and headed up the corridor "We'll phone you-"
"Don't you want us to come with you?" Uruha hurried after.
"No, I've got this" Reita spoke as confidently as he could.
Uruha came to halt and he and Tetora watched their band mates leave, leaving them lost and confused. Of course, Uruha was the one to voice their thoughts-
"Have I missed something?"
So there you go guys; The first chapter! Your opinions? I WILL be carrying this on whether it gets bad reviews or not so look out for updates. JrockSpam will advertise any updates for this story or others.
This is going to be long this fic... There is a lot to happen!