Chapter 1
Freedom, I was free all I had to do was find the strength to get up. My muscles spasmed as I lifted myself up, a groan fell from my lips. I could feel the skin on my back tear again, something steady slipped down my back, and down the back of my bare thighs. I wanted to get out of here, to somewhere that felt remotely safe, and this left me to wonder if anywhere would be safe. A deep fear crept up my throat. I knew what they were doing, my captures. They were sending me out to the desert, with a sense of freedom only to die due to dehydration. They were sadists, they all where. But I had to show them that I would survive the brunt of Mother Nature's anger, to have the sense of freedom I craved, to show them that I wasn't totally broken just cracked. But could I? Did I have that kind of strength? I used to think I did, but I'm not so sure anymore, I'm not sure about anything anymore.
I could hear them, they were all around me, watching my struggles with there amused eyes, and devilish smirks, they were my demons. They were the ones who put me through pain I could barely handle, and somehow I'm still here. I looked towards the open door, with my light lavender eyes I stared sadly. I couldn't get up, I couldn't reach for what I wanted so badly, I could feel the dry sob tear past my sore vocals, it was nothing but a desperate gasp. My eyes stung. I could here them, mocking me, making me hope. I could see one of them; they were standing by the door bowing with his hand pointed outward towards the desert. The evil in his eyes made me shudder. I remember him; he brought pain that cut to the very depths of my soul. I would forever remember what he had done to me, how humiliated he made me feel when I arched into his body and screaming bloody murder. I would forever remember his fingers roughly take me, making my skin crawl. This one would haunt my dreams, for eternity.
"Awe, look men, he can't get up"
I shook my head, I didn't want to hear what they said, and I didn't want to feel so low, that I was worth nothing. I knew I was worth something, I knew I was. I knew. I couldn't believe anything that fell from there foul mouths.
"Poor broken American, can't even fight for his freedom, he's useless to his country"
I could here the sneer in there voices as they spoke, there foreign tongue wasn't hard to understand, I've been around it for months to understand what they are saying. I wasn't useless to my country and I wasn't broken, I wanted to believe it. I desperately wanted too, but somewhere inside me I could feel something breaking, something falling apart. Where they right? Was I useless? There was a humourless chuckle, I shivered.
"He's not useless in all things boys, he's one good fuck!"
I hated that word. Fuck. The brunt of my humiliation stemmed from that word, it's vile in all sense. My head touched the smouldering sand on the bottom of the hut. I could feel it, the flame of humiliation creeping up burning brighter. I heard something soft drop to the side of my head, I titled it slightly to get a better look, it was my badge. My eyes raked over it, reading all the details.
Jericho Witwicky
Captain of the
First Encounter Assault Recon
My eyes landed on the picture, he was a strong looking young man, his lavender eyes showed a burning spirit beneath those windows. What happened to the young man? My eyes caught my reflection on a shinny piece of metal that was covered in a light coat of dust, I saw a man I didn't recognize, long dark brown hair was lank and coated in blood, and dead lavender eyes stared back at me. I knew it was me, had I really fallen that far, was I really broken, dead inside. I squinted there was something hiding behind those windows, what was it, was there some life left in me. Then why was I not trying, why was I giving up. I clenched my hands, the cuts on my knuckles stung. I could here them, they were still laughing. My jaw tightened. Was I really down, or was I thinking up excuses so I wouldn't have to let fellow soldiers see me like this after I made it back? Deep inside I knew it was the latter, I didn't know what they would think and I was scared of that. I didn't know what my parents, or little brother would think. I wanted to see them again, I missed them so much. I missed my father and mothers weird relationship, and I missed my little brother's antics. I wondered if he had gotten that car. I was missing so much out of there lives. I wanted to go home; I could feel something burn deep within my soul. It was growing brighter, hotter. I looked towards the door, I wanted to go home.
I lifted myself up, swaying, my gaze was dizzy. They all stopped laughing, finally they all stopped laughing. My hand closed around my badge. I was determined to leave.
"Well, so the little yank has some spark in him, boys I don't think we broke him completely. Mother nature will finish him off"
No she wouldn't, I wouldn't let here. I stepped forward, I was ready to collapse, my body felt like dead weight.
"Or maybe not, looks like he's going to off himself"
No I wasn't, I caught myself. I can do this, I whispered this encouraging myself forward to freedom, to home. I stepped through the door, the sand was hot against the soles of my feet, the sun caressed my skin burning it, drying it out. They were watching me, waiting for when I would collapse. I wouldn't, I won't let myself. I walked forward; my feet dragged kicking up clouds of sand. I could feel them watching me. I could just here them, I was almost out of hearing range.
"Should we kill him?"
"No, the desert will"
They were wrong, they had to be wrong, I wanted to go home, and nothing was going to stop me, not even Mother Nature herself. I would fight her tooth and nail, if I had the strength for a fight. I knew I didn't have the strength, but I knew I had the will to continue, I just hope it held out till I found some type of civilization.
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I didn't know how long I had been walking, it felt like hours, and it probably was, I had encounter no one, there was a few dried up weed but that was it. I was tiring, I didn't know how long I would last, maybe they were right, maybe Mother Nature would kill me. Maybe my wish to go home, wasn't strong enough, the fire burning in me was dying I could feel it. I was losing my fight. I would never see my family again; I would never know the joy of living. Instead I would die with the last memories of my torture by those bastards. I would die with the last touch from that son of a bitch; I would die with that last memory of my back being torn to shreds by a barbed whip. These are the memories that would die with me. My knees slammed against the sand, and my arms hung limply at my side. I looked towards the sky, the sun was so bright, I could feel its anger. I've lost. I fell forward, my torso slammed into the heated sand. I was going numb, the sand felt like a heated caress. The sun was frying my brain. My eyes were so heavy, but I heard something, it sounded like a car, I could feel it vibrating through the ground. I must have been dreaming, because there was no way there was a car way out here. I was so tired. I just wanted to sleep and never wake up. I saw the car wheels, it wasn't a dream, my eyes closed, then slowly drifted open again, I saw many combat boots, my eyes drifted closed, they were too heavy to keep open.
I could hear the sand being disturbed. Someone touched my naked shoulder, my muscled tensed. I could here a strong voice, but I couldn't hear what it was saying, I was so tired. Slowly I could feel my mind shutting down. I was slipping into unconsciousness, and I couldn't fight it. I wanted it so bad, and I let it consume me.