OUR SONG ABOUT CHARLES

Charles, you are so bald,

Bald and great and great and bald,

We love you Charles,

With your great wheelchair,

You are our star!

You may be anorexic but,

You can still swim like the Thorpedo,

One thing that you can't do is,

Keep your eyebrows to a sensible length.

Tut tut, tut tut, tut, tut, you naughty boy.

You have a PhD

So you have looks and brains as well,

I think you are mega hunky,

Come and beef up your body,

Cos you still look a bit weedy,

Normally you keep as cool as a cucumber,

But occasionally your bald head overheats,

Therefore causing you to shout things.

Example: Welcome to the real world,

HANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your manly physique sends shivers down my spine,

I like to watch you little legs swing,

You like to have children in your house, odd,

Give Michael Jackson a ring,

He'll love your wonderful pondering pose.

John!!!!!! And Elaine!!!!!!

These are your little friends,

Their daughter Jean Jean Grey has terrible nightmares.

Hopefully your PhD will help her.

Like it will help others in the future. Amen Charles Francis.

You love all your children, but does it not worry you,

How many times they all die, especially Jean,

Why don't we now turn the focus of this song,

To talk about them in turn?

You won't mind will you Charlie? Oh you will.

Are you French Charles, are you, answer me,

Francis is a very French name but manly at the same time.

And Xavier, where is this originated from,

It sounds like a type of car, are you secretly a car,

You look like one when you roll around in your wheelchair.

You sound posh and smart with your English accent,

I say English notBritish for it is not Scottish or Irish,

Or Welsh for that matter,

And English people are smart cos I am! I lie not!

Did your brain destroy your hair?

Are your parents dead Charles?

Do you feel in some way guilty because of their deaths?

I think you do and do you know why hmmmmmmm?

You went into teaching to be with children and to hide the guilt.

The guilt of running over your parents and then reversing mangling their bodies.

So it's goodbyes Charles old chum,

Don't go too fast in your chair,

Don't do things too dirty to children; it's illegal,

Keep polishing your head to keep it clean,

And remember I will always love you!

Apart from the guilt thing the reason I went into teaching is,

I was turned away by the detective academy but,

When I ambushed agent Duncan in his night time session in his office,

I used a clever phrase that only real detectives know:

I know what your superiors are planning.

After that information from you Charles,

Now I must say goodbye,

Good bye and adios,

My little chick-a-dee!

(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)(^)

This was written by me and my sister (I did every other verse and she did the bits in between) in a moment of intense boredom. A lot of my sisters stuff is from a dodged up comic I got, I can't find it though hmm, AND REMEMBER, CHARLES IS MANLY!