-When Worlds Collide-
"Check out the book I found," were the first words out of the mouth of the guy who walked into my house wearing a weird combination of clothes in three shades of black. I sighed. Out of all the boyfriends in the world...
"Where did you find this book?"
"At the comic store, where else?"
"Yes, where else would you be on a Saturday?" I was sitting at my computer, listening to a mix of music I had lovingly entitled the 'Bored-Ass Waiting For My Boyfriend Mix.' He never saw the humour in this.
"Do you want to see the damn thing or not?"
"Does it involve hugely-breasted women or men with muscles bigger than their heads?" I didn't even have to look up to see the look on his face. "Not interested."
"I shall smite thee for that."
"You ever get the feeling we watch too much anime?" Leaning over, I picked up one of my Fushigi Yuugi comics. It just happened to be on a page involving *sigh* Nakago the most godlike and perfect specimen of man and that wanton trampYui.
"As you drool on the pages of a $7 comic? No, of course we don't."
"Thank God for a minute I thought..." All at once, a blue light flashed out of the book and we shielded our eyes from it. I don't know about him, but I felt warm all over. When we opened our eyes again, I was the first to speak.
"Big blue flash...cherries everywhere..." This netted me a swat from the black-clad figure next to me.
"As much as I'd love to support your 'Frasier' habit, where the hell are we?" His words caused me to look around in surprise. We weren't on my couch anymore. For a moment I was confused, but my eyes immediately knew.
"This scene!" I jumped to my feet and pointed at the scene. "I'd know it anywhere! We're in the book!"
"In the book." A hand was on my forehead. "You don't feel hot. Were you taking bad drugs again?" I brushed the offending hand away, and he folded his arms. "Wherever we are, it's a forest of some sort."
"Is the idea of us suddenly being sucked into a comic book which we are pretty much worshipping at the moment so...well I guess we'd better get walking." Hoping he wouldn't notice the brilliant way I changed the subject, I started towards the bushes.
As I did, a person stepped out of it. We both immediately dropped into fighting stances, being the *ahem* champion martial artists we were. *cough, cough* Heh. Anyways, the person who walked out of the bushes was wearing a brown Japanese school uniform with a suspiciously short skirt. Her hands were on her hips, and she flipped her sandy-blonde hair.
"Yu-yui?" I was totally blown away. Shocked, I turned to my boyfriend to ask him if we weren't in the book where the hell did Yui come from, only to find that, with a speed he had never before displayed (except in certain comic-book related instances) he had attached himself to Yui.
"Yui, my darling." At once he was beautified by 576%, and had actually shaved. My eye twitched. It was indeed smiting time, and I cursed her for having hair too short to pull once we actually threw down.
Grabbing him by the shirt, I threw my 'beloved' aside and stood before Yui, regretting the fact that I was three or four inches shorter than her. Meanwhile, velcro-boy was attached to her leg. Out of nowhere I had developed a battle aura, and sparks were flying between us. Apparently Yui was seeing him the same way I always had. Until now, that is...dirty little fanboy.
Before I could strike her down with my usual deadly accuracy, the bushes rustled again and out stepped a huge figure in full Seiryuu armor. My heart leapt as his royal purple cloak fluttered in the breeze, and the fight with Yui seemed so unimportant.
"Is there a problem, Yui-sama?"
"Nakago!" My arms spread wide, I ran towards him. Thank God I had opted to wear my short shorts and low-cut pink shirt. Guess I surprised him or something because he missed me with both the ki blasts he threw. Finally, I had my boyfriend's attention as I nuzzled Nakago's arm.
"Give me some room, whoever you are."
"Ooh, I really love it when you're cold..." My eyes sparkled in a maidenly way as I looked up at Nakago, and he turned to smirk at my boyfriend. I laughed as I realized that he had fallen madly in love with me. "You can have her."
"Yes," Nakago said with a smile. "Yui-sama was always rather unresponsive to anyone besides that Tamahome brat."
"I'll fix that!" Pulling a red marker out of thin air (I love anime physics), I reluctantly detached myself from Nakago for a moment to run over and scribble something on my EX-boyfriend's forehead. "Ta-dah!" The fishbulb didn't even thank me as he ran to Yui. Hmph. That's gratitude for you.
"Yui, darling..."
"Why do you have 'frog' written on your forehead?"
"This had better not be permanent ink."
"Come along, Nakago, I'll show you some Bocchu tricks Soi never knew." I began to lead him off by the arm, when the bushes rustled again and the rest of the Seiryuu Shichiseishi emerged. Soi looked at me. I looked at Soi. Again with the sparks. I was just a white belt, but I could take her. She raised her hand to call down a bolt of lightning, but Nakago floored her with one blast.
"Nakago!" Tears ran down her cheeks as her pink (?) hair blew in the wind. "What about all the raising of your 'ki' I did?"
"Thank you." With that, he took my arm and we started off. Meanwhile, my friend the frog was trying to fight off Suboshi and his Ryuuseisui. Ha ha ha ha ha...From the shadows stepped Homo...I mean Tomo, in full makeup. I couldn't tell if he was looking at Nakago or my ex-darling, so I erred on the safe side and tossed my makeup bag far over the horizon to distract him. While he was running after it, Nakago and I continued towards the tent which had magically appeared.
"How about you show me your whip?"
"That was the first thing on my list."
"Oooh, there's a list?"
We disappeared into the tent, and about three and a half hours later when we stopped for a breath, I peeped out to see how my other half was doing. Suboshi was still chasing him over the horizon with his Ryuuseisui while Yui filed her nails, waiting for the victor to emerge. Nakago laughed in an incredibly manly way as he took my shoulder, his magnificent ice-blue eyes sparkling with unbridled desire. I am such a goddess. With a grin, I leaned out the tent flap.
"No guts, no glory, fanged wonder!"
"I'll get you for this, you little pit viper!"
So now we're stuck in the book. Although I'll miss my world *cough* dearly, I'll have to make do with being Naka-chan's 'training partner' until someone opens the book again. I seem to be developing some sort of Bocchu magic...
Meanwhile...
"Go, Ryuuseisui! Teach the man with the mark of the frog what happens to any man who touches Yui-sama!"
"Open the book! Please someone, open the book!"
"Are you boys going to be done anytime soon?"
"Wait for me! Is it my makeup that turns you off?"
"YAAAAAHHHHHH!"