When I was 5 years old, my Mom walked out on me. Daddy said all it was the drugs and such. He said she really had nothing to do with me. I barely remember her. It didn't really bother me though as long as I had daddy. He was everything to me. I know I was everything to him as well. I remember every moment with him. He used to play the piano and sing me to sleep each night. I remember that warm, safe feeling it gave me... I could never let go.
As I thought of everything, I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I looked out the plane's window, watching my home go farther and farther away from me. I was leaving everything behind. As I finally managed to relax, I closed my eyes but then everything flashed through my mind! The burning house, the memories disappearing, My father's screams for help. The doctors echoing voice the moment he said "I'm sorry, Alyssa Carlton.. but your father.. he's dead" My eyes immediately opened in fear. I can't believe that this has happened to me. He was all I had. It all happened too fast. Now I find myself on a plane going to a family members house that I have never met in my lifetime to live with them. Maybe I could learn to be happy, but to tell you the truth, all I really wanted was to be sheltered from life itself. I didn't want to leave. I didn't want things to change. All I wanted to do was just finish off school here and take care of my self but I was only 17 and by law I wasn't eligible to do that.
Instead they sent me to the closest relative I had on my dad's side. I never even knew that my dad had any other relatives! I have never had a grandfather, grandmother, aunts, uncles, or any cousins. The only other relative he had was his cousin, JamieLynn. I had never met her or heard of her before, but the lady who had flown here to California to make sure I was OK on my flight to Pennsylvania told me lots of stories of her. She said she was a sweet lady that was always full of cheer and that I would love her. I just smiled at her and nodded my head.
How she described her I got this picture in my mind of this short old fat grandma that always baked cookies for the little kids in the neighborhood. I looked at my watch to see what time it was and noticed it would only take about a half an hour to get to the airport in Pennsylvania. I was almost there. I felt little butterflies go through out my body as we got closer and closer. As soon as I knew it, the plane was landing. My heart jumped in and out of my chest.
As we walked off the plane and got our luggage we looked around and couldn't spot JamieLynn anywhere. You would think that I would have disappointment in me but truthfully I was relieved. So we called for a taxi and headed our way to her house. after an hour or so, I saw a big house with a little water fountain in front and a big balcony coming off from what seemed to be the master bedroom. As I got out of the car I grabbed my luggage and just stood in front of the house looking at it disbelief. It was the most beautiful house I have ever seen. As I was off in my little daze, a girl came out of the door. she just stared at me for a minute.
"Excuse me? May I help you with anything?" she asked, I looked down at the girl who seemed to be a very pretty person. She had shoulder length blonde hair and big brown eyes.
"Yes, is this JamieLynn's home?" the girl smiled and said
"You must be Alyssa. JamieLynn is my aunt. She told me that you would be arriving here today. She is up in her room right now getting ready. While she is, let me introduce myself. My name is Cassie." As the girl smiled at me I couldn't help but smile back. She seemed very sweet and it seemed that after only being here for five minutes I was already making a new friend.
"My aunt had me come over here today to meet you with her. We will be going to the same high school so don't worry about being alone. You must be kind of bummed to have to move schools on your senior year. Don't worry though, everything will be fine. this is a great school." I'm so glad she said that. Now I don't have to have the worry of going to school friendless. I smiled at her
"Thank you so much. You have no idea what a relief that is" Cassie smiled. In the back round I heard a voice quite distant, calling.
"Cassie, is that you?" Cassie looked at me
"Oh! Looks like she's ready!" I smiled and got a huge stomachache of nerves with everything running through my head. .. What do I say?.. Will she like me ... Oh my gosh what was I going to do?!?! Cassie turned around and hollered back at her. "Yes JamieLynn, I'm out next to the fountain". I heard the door creak and someone walked out. I tried to catch my breath. It was unbelievable. As I stood there looking at her, it was as if I were staring in the mirror at my own reflection. She had the same soft blonde hair that fell to the middle of her back like mine, with my baby blue eyes that have always seemed to have been a mystery to me of who I inherited them from.
As she smiled at me and said "hello" I saw that same nervousness in her eyes as you could see in mine. I smiled back at her and said "hello". She welcomed me into her home and led me to my new room. The house was absolutely amazing. As I walked in the first thing I noticed was the huge chandelier centered in the ceiling along with the wraparound stairs that had fake vines running along them. A hall way led from the stairs and my door was the second to the left. The room was huge with a big window facing outside to a massive lake. The room was rather clean and seemed to have been newly furnished.
I set down the few belongings I had and sat on my new bed and saw JamieLynn in the corner of my eye staring at me unblinkingly. I looked at her and just smiled. Maybe it would have caught her attention.
"I'm sorry" she said. "its just been so long..." That caught my attention. "What?" I asked. She shook her head
"Would you like to see your schedule for school or get to know each other more?" she offered trying to change the subject.
"It doesn't matter to me" I said. I really didn't know what I wanted, but when I saw the sad look that appeared on her face, I said what seemed to be what her heart longed for.
"We can get to know each other more" Her face lit up and she grabbed my hand and showed me the rest of the house. It got even more beautiful as we went. The outside was my favorite. There was a massive lake with a little dock that went off the side. Next to the lake was a little bench with plants next to it. That simple spot was probably my favorite of them all. It was somewhere to leave. Somewhere to go when I wanted to be alone, which is something I craved right now. I didn't want to be here. I didn't want to talk to anyone and I didn't want anyone to talk to me. I couldn't just hide from the world though. Daddy wouldn't like that. He would want me to be strong and keep my head up. So I am proceeding to do so. This is a whole new world for me and I don't want it to happen. I just want to go back to how everything was. I only have this weekend then I am already going back to school. but not just any school. A new school. My senior year. The last thing I wanted to do. I shouldn't look at it like this though. Really, I'm not as misfortunate as I seem. At least I have met a new friend already, and she seems nice. So I won't be alone when it comes to going back to school. Everything will be fine. Especially if I keep telling myself that. Only if Daddy was here.....
I unpacked my stuff and got settled in. Cassie was nice enough to offer to take me shopping before school started because she knew that I had lost a lot of my belongings during the fire.
Before I knew it, the weekend was over and it was time to go to school. I took my shower and put on my new clothes. I got ready and tried to look extra pretty for my first day. After an hour or so, I heard a knock on my door. It was Cassie. "Ready?" she asked.
"Yes" I said nervously. I grabbed my back pack and we headed out the door. We got into her little red beetle and we were on our way. I was so scared. I had never switched schools before, so the whole thought of it was overwhelming. Thank God I had Cassie though. She seemed to have calmed me down about it pretty well. And we had the same lunch hour too. I will be fine, right? After worrying so much I hardly noticed that we were there. I looked out the window to find a huge high school with a huge sign saying "Welcome to Mid Valley High School" and with kids on the campus running around like wild animals. Then I felt the car stop. Oh no.. we're there.
"Ready?" Cassie asked. I looked at her and I know that she could sense the nervousness. "It'll be fine Alyssa, calm down, you'll love it here, and you'll love my friends too. I can't wait for you to meet my boyfriend, Zac." I smiled. What was I thinking?! I was acting as if I were still five years old going into kindergarten.
"You're right" I said. She smiled at me and said "Now come on" and motioned me to get my stuff and to get out of the car. We both grabbed our back packs and headed out on campus. There were so many people. I think so many people it would take three of my old high schools to add up to it! My old school was quite small though compared to others.
As I walked into Mid Valley high it was a total new experience. Everything seemed new and every person in the building seemed to be preppy. They all seemed to have a lot of money and I guess by the richness of everyone, they kind of seemed like snobs. There was a thick line between everyone here and me. Everyone here seemed to have grown up this way. All of them having a lot of money and mothers that stayed home with them everyday. Life for me was totally different. I grew up in a little house outside of California and we weren't rich. Yet, we weren't poor. Daddy worked all the time so he couldn't exactly be with me every second of the day. I kind of envied a lot of the people here. They are everything I have always wanted to be. Inside of me it felt as if I were turning into them. I have the big house now and with my father's death I have a lot of my own money. But deep inside of me I knew the truth, all they needed was material items and all I needed was a pen and paper. I knew who I was and for some reason that couldn't change.
I had been in most of my classes now. They weren't as bad as I thought they would have been. I had one more class until my lunch hour, so it couldn't be that bad considering it would probably be my favorite class of them all. It was my Creative Writing Class. I loved to write. It was everything to me. It was my way of expressing myself these days. The bell rang and I got out of my awful Algebra class to go to my Creative Writing Class. I walked into the class room and found a seat next to the middle row. I got all situated and began to listen to the teacher, Mr. Hindricks. When all of a sudden, someone disturbed the class by coming in late. My eyes looked up over my paper I was writing my name on. I couldn't help but have my jaw drop. Totally not hearing a word that was said from Mr. Hindricks lecturing at the boy that came in late, all I could catch was his name. It was Eric Waylock. Anything else that was said I did not comprehend. I was too busy admiring the boy's dark, wind blown hair, and his piercing green eyes, his profile with his high cheek bones, along with that little dimple that flashed as he smirked at the teacher. As he went to find his seat my eyes followed. He sat two seats ahead of me in the row right next to me. Perfect view. I couldn't help but have a smile creep to my face as I admired him.
Time flew by fast when all you did was sit there staring off into space at a boy. Before I knew it the bell was ringing and it was time for me to go to lunch. Finally. So I met up with Cassie in the hall and we were on our way to the cafeteria when someone grabbed her around her hips. She turned around and gave a tall guy with floppy dirty blonde hair and deep brown eyes a hug and giggled.
"Alyssa, this is Zac, my boyfriend." She introduced us. "Hi" he said in his deep voice "Hi" I said and we shook hands and then went back to going down to the cafeteria. Once we got there allot of her friends crowded around us and she introduced me to all of them. After all the aquatinting, we got our lunches and sat down. Cassie started talking to me and asking how my day was. While we were talking something distracted me. Not something but someone. It was him. Eric. Coming over to OUR table. As I noticed him, everything Cassie said I didn't hear at all. he came up to Zac and gave him a high five, then all of a sudden I heard someone slightly screaming my name and saw someone's hand waving in my face. I shook my head and looked at Cassie trying to get my attention.
"OK?" she asked. I just looked at her and started a smile that led to blushing. She looked at me knowing what was going on. She started to smile.
"You think Eric Warlock is hot don't you?" I looked at her. Just hearing his name gave me little goose bumps all over my body.
"Do I?!?!" I said in surprise. She smiled.
"This is great!" she said. "He's Zac's best friend!!" I looked at her excitedly. "Really?!?!" I asked.
"Yeah" she said "They hang out all the time!" I smiled. Eric sat down and looked over at Cassie
"Why hello Cassie, haven't seen you in a while" He said.
"Hello" she said. He looked over at me and wow let me tell you! He's even more breathtaking when you are up close!
"And who is this stunning friend of yours?" He asked Cassie. I looked over at her and smiled really big.
"My name is Alyssa, and yours?" He smiled at me, making me blush
"I'm Eric" he said. My whole heart just fell to the bottom of my stomach. He just talked to me!! He stung every emotion in my body. There was something about him. Something different. Must be something special because I have never felt anything like this before. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea going to a new school after all.
The bell woke me up from my little daze and I finished up the rest of my class' that I had. By time it was 2:15 and time to leave, I met up with Cassie at the front of the school. I said my good-byes to all the new people I have met that day, including Eric. As we were walking to Cassie's car, she started getting all excited.
"This is great! Wonderful, fantastic, terrific.." she said while naming every word that had to do with something good.
"What is?" I interrupted.
"This! The fact that you like Eric!!" she replied. I looked at her. "I don't like Eric. I don't even know Eric" I said. She looked at me like I was stupid.
"Believe me, you like Eric! You don't just blush when you see every guy!" I smiled at her
"Maybe you're right!" I said with a following giggle. We got in Cassie's car and started to JamieLynn's house. I guess you could say my house too. I'm gonna have to get used to saying that.
As she dropped me off at my house I ran up into my room smiling. I hurried up and finished up all my assignments and then went to get something to eat. I talked to JamieLynn for a little bit telling her how my day was at school. I didn't tell her about the best part though. I didn't quite feel comfortable enough around her to talk about that yet.
The night grew longer and it was time for me to go to bed. I lay there talking to my Daddy as I did every night. Every night before I went to bed I would talk to Daddy and I would tell him what happened that day and how I felt. Kind of like an open journal. Once I was done talking to Daddy I felt myself drifting to sleep.
With all the excitement going on around me, with new friends, a new school, and an amazing new crush, things passed by faster then usual. It was already Friday and I was in the car with Cassie on our way home from school. "There's a pool party at Eric's house tonight" She said. "and we are invited!!" She caught my attention and I looked at her in excitement. "Your kidding me" I said. "No! Its at Five O'clock this evening. Would you like to go together?" She asked. "Sure!" I said. As she dropped me off she yelled out the window. "See you at four thirty!" "Okay!" I replied and went into the house. I ran up to my bed room looking for something to wear. I decided to go with the jean shorts and a tank top over my swimming suit. I didn't want to go to dressy considering it was only a pool party.
It was just about four thirty now and Cassie appeared at the door smiling. "Are you ready?" she asked "Yes I said" We headed out the door and got in Cassie's car. She turned the music up to get us more in the mood. I started getting really nervous wondering what was going to happen tonight. The image of Eric kept running through my mind giving me butterflies through out my body. After driving with Cassie for about twenty minutes we ran into a big brick house. "Here we are!" she said smiling at me. I just smiled and we both go out of the car. As we both went up to the door to ring the door bell Eric came outside.
"Cassie!! hey!" "I didn't expect to see you here, Alyssa. I'm glad you came" I smiled.
"Thanks" I said. Thanks? is that all I could get out? Soon Zac came out of the house and grabbed Cassie. They went to go back to the pool. As they were walking away, leaving me alone with Eric, Cassie winked at me.
"So, Alyssa, want me to show you around my house?" he asked.
"Sure." I said. As he took my hand to lead me to his front door I felt my whole body tingle. After showing me around the house for a while he offered me a drink. As he was getting me a drink he asked
"So who's your boyfriend?"
"I don't have a boyfriend" I said. He looked at me shocked.
"Are u serious?" he asked
"Yes" I replied "
"I thought you had a boyfriend. You look like you do. You always look so pretty." he said. I smiled and couldn't help but blush.
"Thank you" I said. suddenly cassie interrupted by getting a drink. Once she was done getting a drink we both followed her out to the patio and down to the pool where everybody else was. once it grew darker more slow songs came on for the couples to dance at the party. After about three playing, Eric came up to me and asked me to dance with him. Of course I said yes and he took both of my hands that sent that special vibe through out my body and he pulled me closer to his. The heavenly scent of his cologne tickled my nose as he drew me closer. My whole body tingled as we swayed to the music. He made me laugh and he made my heart cry. He was something different. He made me feel different. Being in his arms made me feel special. He made me seem like I had no other troubles in my life. He made me forget about everything.
As we were dancing, the song would follow into another slow song. As I was dancing and laughing I felt my body freeze. I just stood there off in space. Then I felt tears rolling down my cheek. I felt Eric calling my name and trying to get my attention. I didn't listen. I couldn't. I was to distracted. Apparently Eric could feel my body shaking and could see the fear in my eyes. He couldn't catch my attention so he just started to move me in a part of the party that wasn't real crowded.
The song. It was the song. The song my daddy used to play the piano to and use to sing along to before I went to bed. I felt the memories rushing through me like hot rivers of lava and the tears rolling down like it was the end of the world. I was in shock. I couldn't feel anything that went on around me. I didn't care. I was off in space just thinking. Eric sat me down and kept trying to get my attention. Soon after trying to get my attention he realized it wouldn't work and he just stood up and hugged me. He let me cry on his shoulder and whispered to me.
"It will be ok, it will be ok" I just started crying harder and saying out loud that, "It wasn't fair, its just isn't fair"
"What's not fair?" he asked me. I wasn't fully there so I wasn't thinking about if I should tell him or not so I found myself just blurting it all out.
"My daddy. Why did he have to go? Why did he have to leave me?! He was all I had! He used to sing me to sleep and play the piano at night to that song." I cried. Eric just looked at me then held me closer and rocked me back and forth whispering.
"I know what you mean. I have no mother. Everything will be fine though. It will all be okay." He seemed to have calmed me down a bit with those words and his soft deep voice then he took his hand and put two fingers under my chin and moved my chin up so he could look at me. He moved the strands of hair I had along my face and dried my tears. Then he looked in my eyes that felt like forever. I saw the look in his eyes I have never seen in anyone before. They seemed so real and so true. Then, before I knew it, he was tilting his head and heading for me, and then, he kissed me.
A Kiss. A kiss that meant everything to me. A kiss that made me feel like an angel. A kiss that would stay with me for always. A kiss that was so amazing it was just simply unexplainable. After our lips parted he looked up at me rubbing my cheek.
"Everything going to be okay?" he asked
"Yes" I replied. We both smiled at each other then realized the time. Cassie had already gone so he decided to give me a ride home. We got in his white jeep and headed to my house.
"Thank you" I said. He looked at me and smiled.
"Don't mention it" he said. I smiled. Once we got to my house we exchanged numbers and he bent over and kissed me then let me go.
"Sweet dreams" he said
"Good night" I said and we both smiled at each other, then I went into the house. As I skipped up to my room I closed my door then flopped onto my bed. My heart was running a million miles an hour and my emotions were running through everyone I possibly had. I couldn't even believe this has happened. As I was laying there on my bed I heard a knock on my door.
"Yes?" I said.
"May I come in?" a small voice said outside the door. It was JamieLynn. She looked worried which kind of worried me. I have never seen her look disappointed or anything in any upset kind of way. She looked at me in the eye and said "We need to talk".
I hated it when someone said that. It always meant that I was in trouble or something bad was going to happen. She sat on my bed next to me kind of staring off into space. Looking for a choice of words I guess, or so it seemed. After a few moments of silence she looked me in the eye.
"Has your father ever mentioned your mother to you dear?" She asked me. I looked at her wondering what she was trying to get at.
"Yes" I said. "but not much. All he has said to me is that she walked out on me when I was five years old. He said that it was nothing but drugs and that she really had nothing to do with me. I honestly could care less. Apparently she didn't love me if she just walked out." As I looked up a few seconds after I had said that, JamieLynn looked me in the eye. I could see her eyes water up with tears and I could sense the hurt she had in her. Why would she have hurt in her like this? I asked myself.
"Why? What's wrong?" I asked, She looked at me dead in the eye "Alyssa, I'm your mother" she said. I just sat there looking at her. I didn't know what to think. My mother? How could she be my mother? She was my Dad's cousin!
"When you were younger your Father and I didn't get along. We established a divorce and we decided that I would be the one to keep you." she said. "Then one day I came home from work and you two were gone. All there was a note." I tried to catch my breath. I couldn't believe this was happening. "He took you from here, Pennsylvania, to live with him in California. I never knew where you two went. I tried everything to contact you when one day I got a call telling me about what had happened to your father. They wanted to tell you who I was but I told them not to. I didn't think that you would want to come live here if you knew that I was your mother. I am sorry this has all happened and you have had to live with this all of your life." She cried out.
Then I started to notice little tears go down her cheek. I didn't know what to think or what to say. I never thought of meeting my mother and I never suspected her to be her... my mother. I was speechless. After looking at her and noticing more and more tears go down her cheeks I whispered to her like Eric did to me
"It will be ok" then I hugged her and started to cry myself. We rocked each other through the night and ended up drifting off to sleep.
I woke up the next morning finding myself laying next to JamieLynn, my mother. She was rubbing my head admiring me. She smiled at me and said
"Good morning beautiful" I returned her smile and returned her words. "Good morning" "Would you like to go get some breakfast and spend some time together?" she asked. I smiled.
"I would love that" I said.
"Me too" she said. So we both decided to get up and get in the shower and get ready to go. Once we were ready we got in her car and headed down to the mall. After eating we went shopping around and caught up on everything. I told her about my whole life, including Eric. Everything seemed to be coming all together now. Everything will be fine and it was all going great.
Everything went by so fast and it was already time to go back to school. School was great now. With a new best friend and great new boyfriend. I spent a lot of time with Eric. More time than I expected. Since we only had one class together, we didn't see much of each other during school. It seemed we were always together after school though. I learned a lot about him and he learned a lot about me. We were so much alike in so many ways. He loved to write just as much as I did. It was amazing. I saw him as an angel sent down by my Daddy to show me the meaning of life. He made me see everything in a different way. Everything better. He was the only one I could actually open up to about my feelings and my thoughts. We both shared how we felt about each other. He helped me get over the tragic incident that had happened with Daddy and I actually think I helped him with everything that went on with his mother. He helped me in so many ways you couldn't even imagine.
Everything was going by so fast and it was already about a month away from Prom. So it was February. February fourteenth to be exact. Also known as Valentines Day. We didn't have school that day so I decided to go do what I loved to do.
I grabbed my notebook and my pen and headed out to my favorite spot. Out by the lake. There I found a sign out on the dock saying "Happy Valentines Day", all made out in rose petals. Then while I was admiring it someone crept around the tree that was behind me and grabbed my eyes and whispered in my ear, "Guess who?"
"Eric!" I said excitedly He smiled and kissed me on my cheek
"Aw how did you know?" he asked. I just shrugged.
"Happy Valentines Day" he said. I smiled at him and returned what he had said. We sat down on the grass next to the lake and talked all day. we talked about the thing about my Dad, about his Mom and he showed me how life was. We took off our socks and rolled our jeans up and he took my hands and led me into the water. He showed me how it was all rocky in spots and when you clear the rocks it gets smooth. He taught me thats how life was and to have a good life I have to make it that way. It won't just come to me.
I loved being with him. When I was with him I felt this feeling of being free. A feeling of being myself and to wanting to do better. He made me feel special and wanted. Everyday was like this. Always different. I loved it.
As each day passed it was a day closer to Prom. I was so excited about my senior prom. I was going in a stretch limo with Cassie and her boyfriend, Zac and of course Eric. Even though I was at a new high school I was still excited about it. It was already a week before prom and Cassie and I had already gone shopping and got our dresses.
Before I knew it, it was the night. The senior prom. I wanted to be different so I didn't get my hair done like everyone else would be intending to do. I decided to wear it loose with little curls at the bottoms. I had a long white satin dress with white shoes to match.
After getting ready for quite some time, my mom and I heard the door bell ring. Must be Eric. I thought. He was coming here first with the limo, then we were picking up Zac and Cassie. My mom went and got the door and I stood in the mirror making sure everything was perfect. Then I stepped out of my door. I started for the stairs. As I started to walk down the stairs, I felt all the eyes on me. Then once I was down the stairs I caught Eric's eye. He was smiling and his eyes were extra glowing that night. He took my arm and we walked to the door and out to the limo. With that, we went and picked up Cassie and Zac and headed to the prom. The Gym was decorated beautifully and the music was great. we had a wonderful time. Cassie and Zac ended up being King and Queen of the prom. I was so proud of Cassie as she went up to accept her award.
Towards the end of prom we all decided to leave. Eric and I both dropped Cassie and Zac off then we were heading down to my house. Eric got out of the limo and opened my door for me, As I got out, he grabbed both of my heads and pulled me closer to him and slightly kissed me. Then we went down to the lake hand in hand. Down there we talked for hours. Then suddenly he ask, "Alyssa, Have you ever been in love?" I just looked up at him with the reflection of the moonlight in his eyes and smiled. I think he knew what I meant by that then said "Alyssa, I'm serious. I have never been in love before. Everything changed when I met you. My opinions about things now are totally different. You make me want to be someone better. I haven't loved another person since my mother. She was the only woman in my life and I thought she would be the last. Then I met you...I love you Alyssa." I smiled. I could feel my heart smile just as big. He hugged me then we kissed
"I love you too" I whispered. then we realized the time and it was time for him to go. So he kissed my hand good bye and slipped his class ring on my finger as I giggled.
"I love you Princess" he said in a whisper to make sure he didn't wake anyone up. "I love you too my handsome Prince" I said. He smiled and blew me a kiss as they drove off. I sighed. This has been the most wonderful night of my life, I thought to myself.
As I was getting everything together and cleaned up from was getting ready, I heard police cars and I looked out the window to find two police cars and an ambulance go by. Oh my gosh! I thought to myself. I wonder what's going on. So I went down to the family room and turned on the TV to find a car wreck with a Lincoln ... what?!! a black stretch limo. I froze as soon as I saw that. It was the same car. And that same car has been flipped over and over. Immediately fear struck my eyes. This couldn't be happening. I started freaking out and bawling my eyes out as I saw them carry his ... Eric's body out of the car. I was screaming and going crazy. I didn't know what to do. He was all I had now. He was my life. Everything I did, I did for him. He helped me... and now I'm alone. I couldn't stop bawling and Ii had woken up my mom and she came out to help me. I didn't sleep that night. It was impossible. I was no longer me anymore. Everything has been destroyed. I have never loved anyone before. Love was something strong. Love was something that couldn't be taken away. And it was. It was taken away. My angel.... my angel was taken away from me. I stood alone in a dark room wondering where to go now, what to do, how to feel. This has changed my life forever. I will never be the same person as I was before but I will try to be everything I can. He taught me to live my dreams and to make life it's best, but without him it didn't seem possible anymore. I have nothing. I have no ones eyes to look in and blush for anymore, I have no ones hair to stroke and giggle with, I have no more wings to wrap around me and keep me safe, I have no ones heart to have and I had no one to have possession of mine. To me though, he will always be the one with my heart. My heart was for him and always has been. I believe each day now he is next to me trying to direct me in the right direction but it will never be the same. I will do anything to help my heart go on but I will always remember him, for that is all I have left now. I will always remember him. The one I loved. The one that rescued me.
My Angel..... I will always Remember....
As I thought of everything, I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I looked out the plane's window, watching my home go farther and farther away from me. I was leaving everything behind. As I finally managed to relax, I closed my eyes but then everything flashed through my mind! The burning house, the memories disappearing, My father's screams for help. The doctors echoing voice the moment he said "I'm sorry, Alyssa Carlton.. but your father.. he's dead" My eyes immediately opened in fear. I can't believe that this has happened to me. He was all I had. It all happened too fast. Now I find myself on a plane going to a family members house that I have never met in my lifetime to live with them. Maybe I could learn to be happy, but to tell you the truth, all I really wanted was to be sheltered from life itself. I didn't want to leave. I didn't want things to change. All I wanted to do was just finish off school here and take care of my self but I was only 17 and by law I wasn't eligible to do that.
Instead they sent me to the closest relative I had on my dad's side. I never even knew that my dad had any other relatives! I have never had a grandfather, grandmother, aunts, uncles, or any cousins. The only other relative he had was his cousin, JamieLynn. I had never met her or heard of her before, but the lady who had flown here to California to make sure I was OK on my flight to Pennsylvania told me lots of stories of her. She said she was a sweet lady that was always full of cheer and that I would love her. I just smiled at her and nodded my head.
How she described her I got this picture in my mind of this short old fat grandma that always baked cookies for the little kids in the neighborhood. I looked at my watch to see what time it was and noticed it would only take about a half an hour to get to the airport in Pennsylvania. I was almost there. I felt little butterflies go through out my body as we got closer and closer. As soon as I knew it, the plane was landing. My heart jumped in and out of my chest.
As we walked off the plane and got our luggage we looked around and couldn't spot JamieLynn anywhere. You would think that I would have disappointment in me but truthfully I was relieved. So we called for a taxi and headed our way to her house. after an hour or so, I saw a big house with a little water fountain in front and a big balcony coming off from what seemed to be the master bedroom. As I got out of the car I grabbed my luggage and just stood in front of the house looking at it disbelief. It was the most beautiful house I have ever seen. As I was off in my little daze, a girl came out of the door. she just stared at me for a minute.
"Excuse me? May I help you with anything?" she asked, I looked down at the girl who seemed to be a very pretty person. She had shoulder length blonde hair and big brown eyes.
"Yes, is this JamieLynn's home?" the girl smiled and said
"You must be Alyssa. JamieLynn is my aunt. She told me that you would be arriving here today. She is up in her room right now getting ready. While she is, let me introduce myself. My name is Cassie." As the girl smiled at me I couldn't help but smile back. She seemed very sweet and it seemed that after only being here for five minutes I was already making a new friend.
"My aunt had me come over here today to meet you with her. We will be going to the same high school so don't worry about being alone. You must be kind of bummed to have to move schools on your senior year. Don't worry though, everything will be fine. this is a great school." I'm so glad she said that. Now I don't have to have the worry of going to school friendless. I smiled at her
"Thank you so much. You have no idea what a relief that is" Cassie smiled. In the back round I heard a voice quite distant, calling.
"Cassie, is that you?" Cassie looked at me
"Oh! Looks like she's ready!" I smiled and got a huge stomachache of nerves with everything running through my head. .. What do I say?.. Will she like me ... Oh my gosh what was I going to do?!?! Cassie turned around and hollered back at her. "Yes JamieLynn, I'm out next to the fountain". I heard the door creak and someone walked out. I tried to catch my breath. It was unbelievable. As I stood there looking at her, it was as if I were staring in the mirror at my own reflection. She had the same soft blonde hair that fell to the middle of her back like mine, with my baby blue eyes that have always seemed to have been a mystery to me of who I inherited them from.
As she smiled at me and said "hello" I saw that same nervousness in her eyes as you could see in mine. I smiled back at her and said "hello". She welcomed me into her home and led me to my new room. The house was absolutely amazing. As I walked in the first thing I noticed was the huge chandelier centered in the ceiling along with the wraparound stairs that had fake vines running along them. A hall way led from the stairs and my door was the second to the left. The room was huge with a big window facing outside to a massive lake. The room was rather clean and seemed to have been newly furnished.
I set down the few belongings I had and sat on my new bed and saw JamieLynn in the corner of my eye staring at me unblinkingly. I looked at her and just smiled. Maybe it would have caught her attention.
"I'm sorry" she said. "its just been so long..." That caught my attention. "What?" I asked. She shook her head
"Would you like to see your schedule for school or get to know each other more?" she offered trying to change the subject.
"It doesn't matter to me" I said. I really didn't know what I wanted, but when I saw the sad look that appeared on her face, I said what seemed to be what her heart longed for.
"We can get to know each other more" Her face lit up and she grabbed my hand and showed me the rest of the house. It got even more beautiful as we went. The outside was my favorite. There was a massive lake with a little dock that went off the side. Next to the lake was a little bench with plants next to it. That simple spot was probably my favorite of them all. It was somewhere to leave. Somewhere to go when I wanted to be alone, which is something I craved right now. I didn't want to be here. I didn't want to talk to anyone and I didn't want anyone to talk to me. I couldn't just hide from the world though. Daddy wouldn't like that. He would want me to be strong and keep my head up. So I am proceeding to do so. This is a whole new world for me and I don't want it to happen. I just want to go back to how everything was. I only have this weekend then I am already going back to school. but not just any school. A new school. My senior year. The last thing I wanted to do. I shouldn't look at it like this though. Really, I'm not as misfortunate as I seem. At least I have met a new friend already, and she seems nice. So I won't be alone when it comes to going back to school. Everything will be fine. Especially if I keep telling myself that. Only if Daddy was here.....
I unpacked my stuff and got settled in. Cassie was nice enough to offer to take me shopping before school started because she knew that I had lost a lot of my belongings during the fire.
Before I knew it, the weekend was over and it was time to go to school. I took my shower and put on my new clothes. I got ready and tried to look extra pretty for my first day. After an hour or so, I heard a knock on my door. It was Cassie. "Ready?" she asked.
"Yes" I said nervously. I grabbed my back pack and we headed out the door. We got into her little red beetle and we were on our way. I was so scared. I had never switched schools before, so the whole thought of it was overwhelming. Thank God I had Cassie though. She seemed to have calmed me down about it pretty well. And we had the same lunch hour too. I will be fine, right? After worrying so much I hardly noticed that we were there. I looked out the window to find a huge high school with a huge sign saying "Welcome to Mid Valley High School" and with kids on the campus running around like wild animals. Then I felt the car stop. Oh no.. we're there.
"Ready?" Cassie asked. I looked at her and I know that she could sense the nervousness. "It'll be fine Alyssa, calm down, you'll love it here, and you'll love my friends too. I can't wait for you to meet my boyfriend, Zac." I smiled. What was I thinking?! I was acting as if I were still five years old going into kindergarten.
"You're right" I said. She smiled at me and said "Now come on" and motioned me to get my stuff and to get out of the car. We both grabbed our back packs and headed out on campus. There were so many people. I think so many people it would take three of my old high schools to add up to it! My old school was quite small though compared to others.
As I walked into Mid Valley high it was a total new experience. Everything seemed new and every person in the building seemed to be preppy. They all seemed to have a lot of money and I guess by the richness of everyone, they kind of seemed like snobs. There was a thick line between everyone here and me. Everyone here seemed to have grown up this way. All of them having a lot of money and mothers that stayed home with them everyday. Life for me was totally different. I grew up in a little house outside of California and we weren't rich. Yet, we weren't poor. Daddy worked all the time so he couldn't exactly be with me every second of the day. I kind of envied a lot of the people here. They are everything I have always wanted to be. Inside of me it felt as if I were turning into them. I have the big house now and with my father's death I have a lot of my own money. But deep inside of me I knew the truth, all they needed was material items and all I needed was a pen and paper. I knew who I was and for some reason that couldn't change.
I had been in most of my classes now. They weren't as bad as I thought they would have been. I had one more class until my lunch hour, so it couldn't be that bad considering it would probably be my favorite class of them all. It was my Creative Writing Class. I loved to write. It was everything to me. It was my way of expressing myself these days. The bell rang and I got out of my awful Algebra class to go to my Creative Writing Class. I walked into the class room and found a seat next to the middle row. I got all situated and began to listen to the teacher, Mr. Hindricks. When all of a sudden, someone disturbed the class by coming in late. My eyes looked up over my paper I was writing my name on. I couldn't help but have my jaw drop. Totally not hearing a word that was said from Mr. Hindricks lecturing at the boy that came in late, all I could catch was his name. It was Eric Waylock. Anything else that was said I did not comprehend. I was too busy admiring the boy's dark, wind blown hair, and his piercing green eyes, his profile with his high cheek bones, along with that little dimple that flashed as he smirked at the teacher. As he went to find his seat my eyes followed. He sat two seats ahead of me in the row right next to me. Perfect view. I couldn't help but have a smile creep to my face as I admired him.
Time flew by fast when all you did was sit there staring off into space at a boy. Before I knew it the bell was ringing and it was time for me to go to lunch. Finally. So I met up with Cassie in the hall and we were on our way to the cafeteria when someone grabbed her around her hips. She turned around and gave a tall guy with floppy dirty blonde hair and deep brown eyes a hug and giggled.
"Alyssa, this is Zac, my boyfriend." She introduced us. "Hi" he said in his deep voice "Hi" I said and we shook hands and then went back to going down to the cafeteria. Once we got there allot of her friends crowded around us and she introduced me to all of them. After all the aquatinting, we got our lunches and sat down. Cassie started talking to me and asking how my day was. While we were talking something distracted me. Not something but someone. It was him. Eric. Coming over to OUR table. As I noticed him, everything Cassie said I didn't hear at all. he came up to Zac and gave him a high five, then all of a sudden I heard someone slightly screaming my name and saw someone's hand waving in my face. I shook my head and looked at Cassie trying to get my attention.
"OK?" she asked. I just looked at her and started a smile that led to blushing. She looked at me knowing what was going on. She started to smile.
"You think Eric Warlock is hot don't you?" I looked at her. Just hearing his name gave me little goose bumps all over my body.
"Do I?!?!" I said in surprise. She smiled.
"This is great!" she said. "He's Zac's best friend!!" I looked at her excitedly. "Really?!?!" I asked.
"Yeah" she said "They hang out all the time!" I smiled. Eric sat down and looked over at Cassie
"Why hello Cassie, haven't seen you in a while" He said.
"Hello" she said. He looked over at me and wow let me tell you! He's even more breathtaking when you are up close!
"And who is this stunning friend of yours?" He asked Cassie. I looked over at her and smiled really big.
"My name is Alyssa, and yours?" He smiled at me, making me blush
"I'm Eric" he said. My whole heart just fell to the bottom of my stomach. He just talked to me!! He stung every emotion in my body. There was something about him. Something different. Must be something special because I have never felt anything like this before. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea going to a new school after all.
The bell woke me up from my little daze and I finished up the rest of my class' that I had. By time it was 2:15 and time to leave, I met up with Cassie at the front of the school. I said my good-byes to all the new people I have met that day, including Eric. As we were walking to Cassie's car, she started getting all excited.
"This is great! Wonderful, fantastic, terrific.." she said while naming every word that had to do with something good.
"What is?" I interrupted.
"This! The fact that you like Eric!!" she replied. I looked at her. "I don't like Eric. I don't even know Eric" I said. She looked at me like I was stupid.
"Believe me, you like Eric! You don't just blush when you see every guy!" I smiled at her
"Maybe you're right!" I said with a following giggle. We got in Cassie's car and started to JamieLynn's house. I guess you could say my house too. I'm gonna have to get used to saying that.
As she dropped me off at my house I ran up into my room smiling. I hurried up and finished up all my assignments and then went to get something to eat. I talked to JamieLynn for a little bit telling her how my day was at school. I didn't tell her about the best part though. I didn't quite feel comfortable enough around her to talk about that yet.
The night grew longer and it was time for me to go to bed. I lay there talking to my Daddy as I did every night. Every night before I went to bed I would talk to Daddy and I would tell him what happened that day and how I felt. Kind of like an open journal. Once I was done talking to Daddy I felt myself drifting to sleep.
With all the excitement going on around me, with new friends, a new school, and an amazing new crush, things passed by faster then usual. It was already Friday and I was in the car with Cassie on our way home from school. "There's a pool party at Eric's house tonight" She said. "and we are invited!!" She caught my attention and I looked at her in excitement. "Your kidding me" I said. "No! Its at Five O'clock this evening. Would you like to go together?" She asked. "Sure!" I said. As she dropped me off she yelled out the window. "See you at four thirty!" "Okay!" I replied and went into the house. I ran up to my bed room looking for something to wear. I decided to go with the jean shorts and a tank top over my swimming suit. I didn't want to go to dressy considering it was only a pool party.
It was just about four thirty now and Cassie appeared at the door smiling. "Are you ready?" she asked "Yes I said" We headed out the door and got in Cassie's car. She turned the music up to get us more in the mood. I started getting really nervous wondering what was going to happen tonight. The image of Eric kept running through my mind giving me butterflies through out my body. After driving with Cassie for about twenty minutes we ran into a big brick house. "Here we are!" she said smiling at me. I just smiled and we both go out of the car. As we both went up to the door to ring the door bell Eric came outside.
"Cassie!! hey!" "I didn't expect to see you here, Alyssa. I'm glad you came" I smiled.
"Thanks" I said. Thanks? is that all I could get out? Soon Zac came out of the house and grabbed Cassie. They went to go back to the pool. As they were walking away, leaving me alone with Eric, Cassie winked at me.
"So, Alyssa, want me to show you around my house?" he asked.
"Sure." I said. As he took my hand to lead me to his front door I felt my whole body tingle. After showing me around the house for a while he offered me a drink. As he was getting me a drink he asked
"So who's your boyfriend?"
"I don't have a boyfriend" I said. He looked at me shocked.
"Are u serious?" he asked
"Yes" I replied "
"I thought you had a boyfriend. You look like you do. You always look so pretty." he said. I smiled and couldn't help but blush.
"Thank you" I said. suddenly cassie interrupted by getting a drink. Once she was done getting a drink we both followed her out to the patio and down to the pool where everybody else was. once it grew darker more slow songs came on for the couples to dance at the party. After about three playing, Eric came up to me and asked me to dance with him. Of course I said yes and he took both of my hands that sent that special vibe through out my body and he pulled me closer to his. The heavenly scent of his cologne tickled my nose as he drew me closer. My whole body tingled as we swayed to the music. He made me laugh and he made my heart cry. He was something different. He made me feel different. Being in his arms made me feel special. He made me seem like I had no other troubles in my life. He made me forget about everything.
As we were dancing, the song would follow into another slow song. As I was dancing and laughing I felt my body freeze. I just stood there off in space. Then I felt tears rolling down my cheek. I felt Eric calling my name and trying to get my attention. I didn't listen. I couldn't. I was to distracted. Apparently Eric could feel my body shaking and could see the fear in my eyes. He couldn't catch my attention so he just started to move me in a part of the party that wasn't real crowded.
The song. It was the song. The song my daddy used to play the piano to and use to sing along to before I went to bed. I felt the memories rushing through me like hot rivers of lava and the tears rolling down like it was the end of the world. I was in shock. I couldn't feel anything that went on around me. I didn't care. I was off in space just thinking. Eric sat me down and kept trying to get my attention. Soon after trying to get my attention he realized it wouldn't work and he just stood up and hugged me. He let me cry on his shoulder and whispered to me.
"It will be ok, it will be ok" I just started crying harder and saying out loud that, "It wasn't fair, its just isn't fair"
"What's not fair?" he asked me. I wasn't fully there so I wasn't thinking about if I should tell him or not so I found myself just blurting it all out.
"My daddy. Why did he have to go? Why did he have to leave me?! He was all I had! He used to sing me to sleep and play the piano at night to that song." I cried. Eric just looked at me then held me closer and rocked me back and forth whispering.
"I know what you mean. I have no mother. Everything will be fine though. It will all be okay." He seemed to have calmed me down a bit with those words and his soft deep voice then he took his hand and put two fingers under my chin and moved my chin up so he could look at me. He moved the strands of hair I had along my face and dried my tears. Then he looked in my eyes that felt like forever. I saw the look in his eyes I have never seen in anyone before. They seemed so real and so true. Then, before I knew it, he was tilting his head and heading for me, and then, he kissed me.
A Kiss. A kiss that meant everything to me. A kiss that made me feel like an angel. A kiss that would stay with me for always. A kiss that was so amazing it was just simply unexplainable. After our lips parted he looked up at me rubbing my cheek.
"Everything going to be okay?" he asked
"Yes" I replied. We both smiled at each other then realized the time. Cassie had already gone so he decided to give me a ride home. We got in his white jeep and headed to my house.
"Thank you" I said. He looked at me and smiled.
"Don't mention it" he said. I smiled. Once we got to my house we exchanged numbers and he bent over and kissed me then let me go.
"Sweet dreams" he said
"Good night" I said and we both smiled at each other, then I went into the house. As I skipped up to my room I closed my door then flopped onto my bed. My heart was running a million miles an hour and my emotions were running through everyone I possibly had. I couldn't even believe this has happened. As I was laying there on my bed I heard a knock on my door.
"Yes?" I said.
"May I come in?" a small voice said outside the door. It was JamieLynn. She looked worried which kind of worried me. I have never seen her look disappointed or anything in any upset kind of way. She looked at me in the eye and said "We need to talk".
I hated it when someone said that. It always meant that I was in trouble or something bad was going to happen. She sat on my bed next to me kind of staring off into space. Looking for a choice of words I guess, or so it seemed. After a few moments of silence she looked me in the eye.
"Has your father ever mentioned your mother to you dear?" She asked me. I looked at her wondering what she was trying to get at.
"Yes" I said. "but not much. All he has said to me is that she walked out on me when I was five years old. He said that it was nothing but drugs and that she really had nothing to do with me. I honestly could care less. Apparently she didn't love me if she just walked out." As I looked up a few seconds after I had said that, JamieLynn looked me in the eye. I could see her eyes water up with tears and I could sense the hurt she had in her. Why would she have hurt in her like this? I asked myself.
"Why? What's wrong?" I asked, She looked at me dead in the eye "Alyssa, I'm your mother" she said. I just sat there looking at her. I didn't know what to think. My mother? How could she be my mother? She was my Dad's cousin!
"When you were younger your Father and I didn't get along. We established a divorce and we decided that I would be the one to keep you." she said. "Then one day I came home from work and you two were gone. All there was a note." I tried to catch my breath. I couldn't believe this was happening. "He took you from here, Pennsylvania, to live with him in California. I never knew where you two went. I tried everything to contact you when one day I got a call telling me about what had happened to your father. They wanted to tell you who I was but I told them not to. I didn't think that you would want to come live here if you knew that I was your mother. I am sorry this has all happened and you have had to live with this all of your life." She cried out.
Then I started to notice little tears go down her cheek. I didn't know what to think or what to say. I never thought of meeting my mother and I never suspected her to be her... my mother. I was speechless. After looking at her and noticing more and more tears go down her cheeks I whispered to her like Eric did to me
"It will be ok" then I hugged her and started to cry myself. We rocked each other through the night and ended up drifting off to sleep.
I woke up the next morning finding myself laying next to JamieLynn, my mother. She was rubbing my head admiring me. She smiled at me and said
"Good morning beautiful" I returned her smile and returned her words. "Good morning" "Would you like to go get some breakfast and spend some time together?" she asked. I smiled.
"I would love that" I said.
"Me too" she said. So we both decided to get up and get in the shower and get ready to go. Once we were ready we got in her car and headed down to the mall. After eating we went shopping around and caught up on everything. I told her about my whole life, including Eric. Everything seemed to be coming all together now. Everything will be fine and it was all going great.
Everything went by so fast and it was already time to go back to school. School was great now. With a new best friend and great new boyfriend. I spent a lot of time with Eric. More time than I expected. Since we only had one class together, we didn't see much of each other during school. It seemed we were always together after school though. I learned a lot about him and he learned a lot about me. We were so much alike in so many ways. He loved to write just as much as I did. It was amazing. I saw him as an angel sent down by my Daddy to show me the meaning of life. He made me see everything in a different way. Everything better. He was the only one I could actually open up to about my feelings and my thoughts. We both shared how we felt about each other. He helped me get over the tragic incident that had happened with Daddy and I actually think I helped him with everything that went on with his mother. He helped me in so many ways you couldn't even imagine.
Everything was going by so fast and it was already about a month away from Prom. So it was February. February fourteenth to be exact. Also known as Valentines Day. We didn't have school that day so I decided to go do what I loved to do.
I grabbed my notebook and my pen and headed out to my favorite spot. Out by the lake. There I found a sign out on the dock saying "Happy Valentines Day", all made out in rose petals. Then while I was admiring it someone crept around the tree that was behind me and grabbed my eyes and whispered in my ear, "Guess who?"
"Eric!" I said excitedly He smiled and kissed me on my cheek
"Aw how did you know?" he asked. I just shrugged.
"Happy Valentines Day" he said. I smiled at him and returned what he had said. We sat down on the grass next to the lake and talked all day. we talked about the thing about my Dad, about his Mom and he showed me how life was. We took off our socks and rolled our jeans up and he took my hands and led me into the water. He showed me how it was all rocky in spots and when you clear the rocks it gets smooth. He taught me thats how life was and to have a good life I have to make it that way. It won't just come to me.
I loved being with him. When I was with him I felt this feeling of being free. A feeling of being myself and to wanting to do better. He made me feel special and wanted. Everyday was like this. Always different. I loved it.
As each day passed it was a day closer to Prom. I was so excited about my senior prom. I was going in a stretch limo with Cassie and her boyfriend, Zac and of course Eric. Even though I was at a new high school I was still excited about it. It was already a week before prom and Cassie and I had already gone shopping and got our dresses.
Before I knew it, it was the night. The senior prom. I wanted to be different so I didn't get my hair done like everyone else would be intending to do. I decided to wear it loose with little curls at the bottoms. I had a long white satin dress with white shoes to match.
After getting ready for quite some time, my mom and I heard the door bell ring. Must be Eric. I thought. He was coming here first with the limo, then we were picking up Zac and Cassie. My mom went and got the door and I stood in the mirror making sure everything was perfect. Then I stepped out of my door. I started for the stairs. As I started to walk down the stairs, I felt all the eyes on me. Then once I was down the stairs I caught Eric's eye. He was smiling and his eyes were extra glowing that night. He took my arm and we walked to the door and out to the limo. With that, we went and picked up Cassie and Zac and headed to the prom. The Gym was decorated beautifully and the music was great. we had a wonderful time. Cassie and Zac ended up being King and Queen of the prom. I was so proud of Cassie as she went up to accept her award.
Towards the end of prom we all decided to leave. Eric and I both dropped Cassie and Zac off then we were heading down to my house. Eric got out of the limo and opened my door for me, As I got out, he grabbed both of my heads and pulled me closer to him and slightly kissed me. Then we went down to the lake hand in hand. Down there we talked for hours. Then suddenly he ask, "Alyssa, Have you ever been in love?" I just looked up at him with the reflection of the moonlight in his eyes and smiled. I think he knew what I meant by that then said "Alyssa, I'm serious. I have never been in love before. Everything changed when I met you. My opinions about things now are totally different. You make me want to be someone better. I haven't loved another person since my mother. She was the only woman in my life and I thought she would be the last. Then I met you...I love you Alyssa." I smiled. I could feel my heart smile just as big. He hugged me then we kissed
"I love you too" I whispered. then we realized the time and it was time for him to go. So he kissed my hand good bye and slipped his class ring on my finger as I giggled.
"I love you Princess" he said in a whisper to make sure he didn't wake anyone up. "I love you too my handsome Prince" I said. He smiled and blew me a kiss as they drove off. I sighed. This has been the most wonderful night of my life, I thought to myself.
As I was getting everything together and cleaned up from was getting ready, I heard police cars and I looked out the window to find two police cars and an ambulance go by. Oh my gosh! I thought to myself. I wonder what's going on. So I went down to the family room and turned on the TV to find a car wreck with a Lincoln ... what?!! a black stretch limo. I froze as soon as I saw that. It was the same car. And that same car has been flipped over and over. Immediately fear struck my eyes. This couldn't be happening. I started freaking out and bawling my eyes out as I saw them carry his ... Eric's body out of the car. I was screaming and going crazy. I didn't know what to do. He was all I had now. He was my life. Everything I did, I did for him. He helped me... and now I'm alone. I couldn't stop bawling and Ii had woken up my mom and she came out to help me. I didn't sleep that night. It was impossible. I was no longer me anymore. Everything has been destroyed. I have never loved anyone before. Love was something strong. Love was something that couldn't be taken away. And it was. It was taken away. My angel.... my angel was taken away from me. I stood alone in a dark room wondering where to go now, what to do, how to feel. This has changed my life forever. I will never be the same person as I was before but I will try to be everything I can. He taught me to live my dreams and to make life it's best, but without him it didn't seem possible anymore. I have nothing. I have no ones eyes to look in and blush for anymore, I have no ones hair to stroke and giggle with, I have no more wings to wrap around me and keep me safe, I have no ones heart to have and I had no one to have possession of mine. To me though, he will always be the one with my heart. My heart was for him and always has been. I believe each day now he is next to me trying to direct me in the right direction but it will never be the same. I will do anything to help my heart go on but I will always remember him, for that is all I have left now. I will always remember him. The one I loved. The one that rescued me.
My Angel..... I will always Remember....