The Pendant

One momentary lapse and one second of forgetfulness can have monumental consequences and a lifetime of repairs.

Alexander had taken his bath and scrubbed the mud from his body. His dirty clothes were in a heap beside the bath and his pendant, the one whose twin was around Hephaestion's neck, was on his bed. In his haste to get to the meeting, he walked by the bed, his mind already full of things he needed to discuss.

The pendant remained on the bed.

Bagaos cleaned the room after Alexander left. As he was making the bed, he slipped the necklace around his neck so it didn't get lost in the covers.

It could have ended there. Alexander could have remembered he didn't have it on and went back after the meeting for it before he went to the banquet. Bagoas could have taken it off as soon as he had made the bed up. They could have, but they didn't.

And so as things will happen, someone else did notice, the last person in the world they wished would not have seen.

The banquet was just getting started, dancers were starting their performances, food was being served and the wine was being poured.

Hephaestion entered the room and looked towards the podium. Alexander was in his chair surrounded by his wife, Bagaos and his guards. Hephaestion smiled as he looked at the handsome king and his eyes began to wander over his lover.

They stopped at his neck, his bare neck.

About the same time, Alexander motioned for Bagoas to come close, he had a task for him to do. As Bagoas leaned forward, Alexander spotted the pendant dangling from his slender neck at the very same time Hephaestion did. Alexander quickly yanked it off Bagoas' neck and slipped it back on his own.

It only took a second to make the exchange, not fast enough for Alexander but the longest second in Hephaestion's lifetime.

Alexander was about to ask Bagaos why he was wearing his pendant as he looked around the room for Hephaestion. He knew what this must have looked like to everyone, especially his beloved.

And then their eyes met across the crowded room and time stood still. The noises from the room evaporated and the only movement they both saw were in each other's eyes.

Alexander always thought he could explain what pain was, but he didn't begin to know its depth till he saw it through those blue eyes he held so dear. Alexander would do anything to make this moment disappear.

Before Alexander could make the move to rise from his chair, Hephaestion turned and left the hall quickly. Each step was heavy and he felt a pain deep down in his chest. He had to get away, far away from the hall. He had to get away from Alexander.

Their relationship had always been based on trust and honesty but suddenly all of that was broken. It was as if his very foundation was shaken to its core. He went to the stables and slipped in the stall with his favorite horse. He began brushing him down numbly, all his thoughts banging around the inside of his head. After a while his emotions came rushing out and he sank to his knees and sobbed.

Alexander ran after Hephaestion but lost him after he left the room. He searched every place he thought Hephaestion would go and there was no sign of him. Panic began to escalate with each passing minute and soon he was frantic.

He had to find him, talk to him, and hold him. He had to make that pain disappear from his eyes.

It was the longest night of both of their lives. They spent it alone, one completely engulfed in guilt and panic and the other trying to piece back his heart.

Morning finally arrived and a calm covered the palace. A very tired and weary man made his way to his rooms. Each step seemed to be as heavy as his heart. It had taken all night through tears and serious thinking but he had come to a decision.

He loved Alexander enough to let him go. If he couldn't make him happy then he needed to let Alexander find someone who could and it seemed that Bagoas could do that for him. Now all he needed to do was to have the strength to step back and away from the love of his life. He prayed to the gods to give him the strength to do just that.

As he entered his room, he found the last person he wanted to see there. Alexander sat in a chair but rose quickly when he came through the doorway. He started towards Hephaestion but was stopped cold by the look on his face.

Hephaestion was tired, that was evident, but there was much more on that handsome face. He was pale. No color painted his beautiful cheeks. But it was his eyes that had stopped Alexander cold. They were empty and vacant. Alexander had never seen them so lifeless.

"Hephaestion." Alexander said in a whisper.

"Alexander." Hephaestion answered back in an empty voice.

"It was as a mistake, you see I…"

"You don't have to explain." Hephaestion said holding up his hand.

"But I do, please just listened to what I have to say before you make anymore judgments, please?"

Hephaestion sank heavily in a nearby chair and nodded.

Alexander began his tale and as he was talking he edged his way closer to the pained man. By the time he had finished, he was kneeling in front of him. Tears were rolling down Alexander's face with his last words.

It was silent in the room for a while, the most painful silence Alexander had ever endured and the longest.

"I have done many things in my lifetime, I have accomplished much, but it all has little meaning to me now. My life will be a complete failure if I lose you, for you see, you are the best of me. These one stupid series of events could make my life become a horrible failure. I am the man I have become because of you. Your truth and love have given me the strength to be better than I could have ever been on my own. You are my foundation."

"You are my life, my hope, my dreams and without you I don't want to go on."

Alexander lowered his head and slumped in front of Hephaestion on the floor, as if he had no more strength to go on. He now seemed as drained as the man on the chair in front of him.

Hephaestion looked at his King, the man he loved dearly, and the man he was willing to let go only a few minutes before.

Slowly he slid out of his chair and into the floor in front of Alexander. Alexander lifted his head and their eyes met. No words were spoken, that would come later. First the tears had to flow, the cleansing tears of two people who cherished each other, the tears of two who were meant to be together for eternity.

Bagoas never touched the pendant again for fear of losing is hands. Alexander never removed it from his neck again, no matter how dirty it became.

And Hephaestion, he didn't step away from Alexander, he stepped closer and held on tight.

The stones around their necks could not match the strength and love in their hearts.