A/N: Trying to break my writer's block. Oneshots, left and right. The Sacred and Profane, I have NOT forgotten about you!

Disclaimer: I own nothing but Kandi.

Kandi was humming along to the sounds of Hinder coming from her computer as she happily typed up a report Zack needed this afternoon. She had her Spiritual Power incense burning in her five-headed dragon incense burner and she was feeling the soothing affects of the aromatic aura the smoke was creating, billowing in puffs from the various orafices of the creature. And...it was almost lunch time, her favorite time of the day. Soon, her super sexy boss would come out, plop his fine ass on her desk and ask her where she wanted him to take her, all the while flashing her that completely moronic yet endearing smirk he had patented.

Then, they'd probably come back to the office for some mind blowing afternoon sex.

All in all, a typical Tuesday.

"Excuse me?"

Kandi looked up from her computer and smiled at the woman standing in front of her. The first thing the red-streaked secretary noticed was the pink. So...much...pink. This other woman oozed it. The next thing she noticed were her striking green eyes. They were, for lack of a better word, just stunning. They sparkled and shimmered in an almost etheral way. Setting down a rather large basket of flowers, she smiled at the secretary.

"Does Zack Fair work here?" she asked, her soft voice nearly floating to Kandi's ears.

"Uh, yeah," she said, shaking herself. "Yeah! Actually, I'm his secretary." She pointed to the door on her left. "That's his office. Is he expecting you?"

The woman giggled and shook her head, her long chestnut hair dancing about her slim, yet shapely hips. "No," she replied. "I thought I'd stop by and surprise him by taking him to lunch." She stuck her hand out to Kandi, who took it cheerfully. "I'm Aeris(th) Gainesborough. Zack's girlfriend."

Kandi didn't expect her heart to drop like it did from hearing those words. "G-girlfriend?" she stuttered, mentally slapping herself for that. She plastered on a smile she prayed looked genuine. "I'm Kandi. It's so nice to meet you!"

Aeris(th) beamed. "Thanks!" she said. She cocked her head sweetly. "Has he...ever mentioned me?"

Kandi shook her head slowly. "No, but...Col. Fair normally doesn't bring his personal life to work," she smoothly lied. It killed her to refer to Zack so formally, but she didn't want Aeris(th) to know that Zack had never mentioned her before. At least, he hadn't mentioned her to his secretary. "Would you like me to tell him you're here?"

Aeris(th) nodded sweetly. "Oh, please," she said, rummaging through her basket of flowers and arranging a small bouquet.

Kandi picked up her phone, not opting to use the speaker option like she normally did, fearing Zack would answer as he normally did...

"Hey, Sexy," he purred into her ear.

Kandi blinked her eyes rapidly. "Col. Fair, there is a young lady by the name of Miss Gainesborough here to see you," she said professionally.

Silence. Then, "Aeris(th) is here?" he asked, no emotion in his voice.

"Yes, Sir," she answered. "Shall I tell her you'll be out momentarily?"

"Kandi, I..."

"That's fine, Sir," she interrupted."Thank you."

Hanging up the phone gently, she turned her smile to Aeris(th). "He should be out soon," she told her. "Would you like some coffee?"

"Oh, no, but thank you very much," Aeris(th) replied sweetly. She sat on Kandi's desk, studying her bouquet of flowers and making adjustments to the arrangements. "Is Zack nice to work with?"

"Oh, yes," Kandi answered truthfully. "I love working for him. He's very nice and always very happy. I couldn't ask for a better boss."

Aeris(th) beamed again. "I'm so glad!" she said. "I know I adore him, but my mother thinks I just might be blinded by love. She'll be glad to know that even his secretary likes him."

Kandi smiled genuinely, masking the small amount of hurt she felt. "Col. Fair is very well liked here at Shin-Ra," she told her. "He's very popular. And I can easily say that he's one of my best friends."

"Funny," Aeris(th) said innocently. "I don't remember him ever mentioning you, Kandi."

The red-streaked woman swallowed the lump that had jumped in her throat. "Like I said," she explained softly as Zack's door cracked open. "Col. Fair doesn't bring his personal life to work...nor does he bring his work life into his personal one."

Aeris(th)'s eyes shifted and her face broke out into the most angelic expression Kandi had ever seen."Zack!" she exclaimed, throwing herself in his arms.

Zack returned the embrace, glancing over Aeris(th)'s shoulder to his secretary, who had professionally averted her gaze and went back to her work."Aeris(th)," he said with a smile."What a surprise."

Aeris(th) giggled."That's what I had in mind, Silly," she said, linking her arm through his. "I want to take you out to lunch."

Zack turned his violet eyes back to Kandi, who was still working diligently. "Oh, well, I usually go with friends to lunch," he explained.

At Aeris(th)'s crestfallen expression, he sighed and smiled. "But, I suppose today I could break tradition," he said, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear.

Aeris(th) beamed at him. "Oh good!" she said. She looked at the arrangement of flowers in her hand and turned back to Kandi, handing them to her. "It was nice to meet you, Kandi. Thank you for taking care of Zack while he's at work."

Kandi took the flowers and breathed in their scent, closing her eyes as if savoring it, but actually fighting a losing battle with her tears. "My pleasure, Miss Gainesborough," she said softly. She lifted her eyes and smiled at the couple before her. "Have a pleasant lunch, Sir."

"You too, Kandi," Zack said, his voice holding an apologetic tone. Giggling, Aeris(th) dragged him off with her down the hall to the elevators. Before they stepped in, though, Zack looked back at his secretary, watching as she gently placed the flowers in a cup of water...and made a gesture, much like one would make when wiping away a tear.

"So, what's the bitch like?" Akalara asked, chewing thoughtfully on her sandwich.

Kandi shrugged as she twirled her soup with her spoon. "Definitely not a bitch," she said softly. "She's really nice, Ak. And she is so beautiful. Almost...otherworldly, you know?"

They were sitting in Midgar Bread Company, the only two out of their normal sextet present. Lily had a doctor's appointment to go to, Reno was on a mission, Sephiroth was being forced to dine with President ShinRa and Zack...was with his girlfriend.

Kandi sighed and leaned back in her chair, leaving her spoon in her soup, her sandwich untouched. Akalara noticed this and arched a green eyebrow in question. "You haven't touched your food," she observed.

Her red-streaked friend shook her head. "Not hungry," she murmured.

Akalara paused mid bite. "You? Not hungry?" she asked. Setting her sandwich down, she grabbed Kandi's hands in hers. "Sweetie, stop it. You're scaring me."

"I'm sorry, Ak, but I just don't feel like eating right now," she replied, her eyes downcast.

The green-haired woman shook her head. "Kandi," she began. "You knew you guys weren't really together."

"I know," she said with a nod. "I really do. But now it just seems so...final."

"Well," Akalara offered with an evil grin. "We could off her. I could borrow Seph's sword. I'm sure Masamune would look splendid protruding from her back. And then Zack would be all yours!"

Kandi shook her head, fighting back her tears. "No," she answered softly. "If she makes him happy, then I'll be happy. She's so much better than me, Ak. You should have seen her. She was really unbelievable. So pure and innocent. I've never felt so tarnished in my life."

"Stop it," Akalara snapped. "You are just as good as her. Fuck purity. Just means she's probably only done oral. If that. Probably not even that if Zack keeps coming to you for sex."

"Yep, that's me," Kandi answered with a sigh. "Good ol' Kandi, the buddy that's always good for a quick fuck."

"Okay, am I missing something?" Akalara asked. "Are you in love with Blackspike or something? Because that sure as hell is how it sounds."

"No, not in love with him," Kandi explained. "I guess it just really puts it into perspective what I am and probably always will be." She crumpled her napkin in her hand, fighting back the shame that crept on her. "You can take the Honey Bee outta the hive, but the stinger keeps being a pain in her ass."

Kandi heaved a huge sigh as she made her way back to her desk, tossing her purse onto the corner. The damn thing feel, spilling the contents onto the floor. "Damn it," she cursed, bending down to pick it and everything else up.

She reached for a tube of lipstick, her hand being engulfed by another, much larger hand. Kandi looked up into Zack's violet eyes and felt a twinge of apprehension come over her.

"Hey," she said casually. "How was lunch?"

"Can we talk?" he asked, still holding her hand in his. He gestured to his office. "In private."

She nodded, setting her purse on her desk. "Yeah, sure," she answered, following him to the door and walking inside before him.

Zack closed the door and Kandi turned to him, watching as he thrust his fingers in his hair. "Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Aeris(th)," he began. "I mean, we're not exclusive or anything. We're just kinda dating."

"Zack..."

"I know she told you she was my girlfriend, but she's not," he continued desperately. "Not really. She thinks she is, but the girl is just so naive sometimes. I think I'm the first guy she's really liked, so she's kinda jumping the gun."

"She's sweet."

Zack looked up at her, expression shocked. "Huh?"

"Aeris(th)," Kandi clarified. "She's nice. I like her. She's really pretty, too."

He cocked his head in confusion. "What?"

Kandi shook her head and sighed. "She's good for you, Zack," she told him. "She's the kind of girl you take home to your parents and show off proudly. The kind that most guys fantasize about marrying. She probably even bakes, for fuck's sake, and I know she doesn't swear." Kandi let out a deep breath and gave him a pained grin. "She's the kind of girl who nice boys from Gongaga settle down with and have lots of spawn with.

"She's the kind of girl, I wish I could be sometimes."

"Why?" Zack asked in awe. "You're perfect just the way you are. I don't want you to change or be like Aeris(th). You're funny, smart, hot..."

"Zack, you ever go to the weapon shop and see that sword in there that's nice and shiny and brand new?" she interrupted. "The one who's blade has never sliced a thing, who's handle has never been touched by another man? And then you look at your old sword and think, 'Wow. I wish I had that new, better sword.'"

Zack nodded. "Sure," he answered. "Who hasn't?"

"Aeris(th)," Kandi continued. "Is the new sword. That bright, perfect piece of art just waiting for you to claim it. And I'm the dirty, tarnished old sword who's shine is long gone and who's worth in light of the new sword, has significantly fallen."

Zack crossed his arms and leaned back against his door, studying her. "You really think that?" he asked.

"Zack," Kandi said with a longsuffering smile. "I know what I was. I know what I still am. I can't change it. You deserve a girl like Aeris(th). New, untouched and perfect."

The SOLDIER First Class pushed himself off the door and went to take his old Buster sword from it's stand next to his desk. The familiar feel of the worn grip gave him a sense of peace and reassurance. His free hand grasped a hold of Kandi's, the same sense filling him at the touch. "You know," he said, examining the worn blade of his weapon. "The thing about new swords, is it takes a long time to get used to the feel. In battle, you could falter whereas the feel of your old sword is just natural; an extention of yourself."

Lacing their fingers together he stepped forward and pressed his forehead to hers. "New swords are nice and all," he told her lowly. "But you know, I think I'll just stick with what I've got. I see no reason to change."

Kandi's lips curved up into a smile, reaching up to run her fingers over his chin. "Okay," she whispered.

Zack grinned and kissed her gently on the lips. Stepping away slightly, he held his Buster sword out and examined it. "Yeah, my old sword is just perfect for me," he commented before casting her a devilish grin. "But I'll still look in the shop window from time to time."

Kandi laughed and smacked him on the arm then threw her arms around him. "You always know just what to say, don't you, Zack?"

He kissed the top of her head and grinned. "Most of the time," he answered. He regarded her momentarily. "We cool?"

Kandi nodded. "Always."

A/N: I know, the odds of Aeris(th) going to the ShinRa Building are slim to none, but that's why this is fanfiction. And...I didn't bash her this time. Be proud of me. That was hard. Review please!