It was a restless night for Wendy, the air awfully warm for a December night. John had awoken to a nightmare, and disoriented, made his way to their parents room. Michael woke up an hour later and noticed his brother to be missing.
"Wendy", he whispered, "Where has John gone?"
"He went to mother and father's room. You can go on too if you'd like."
And he did so, dragging his teddy along.
The room was now filled with only one person, which felt especially unnatural to Wendy. The sound of her brothers breaths at night soothed her. Now only the heavy air wisping into her window held her company.
She sighed a heavy sigh, running her fingers along her scalp to feel a fresh layer of sweat.
"It feels like summer", she said to herself.
She got up, giving up on the sleep she'd been chasing for hours. Her feet padded lightly against the wood of the nursery as she made her way to the large window. A curious young boy had once met her at that very spot. He had taken her hand and taught her to fly. She longed for him to come back very much.
A star had flown by her eyes at that moment. Her eyes widened; she had never seen a star so large. She closed her eyes tight in a flash, held her acorn pendant in the cusp of her two palms, and made a wish.
'please oh please bring Peter back to me, that is all I want and will ever want.'
"Missed me?"
She opened her eyes to see a very bright Peter Pan in front of her. He had been the star all along!
"Peter!", she cried. Wendy felt tears welling in her eyes. She had missed him so much.
He landed lightly in her room. Wendy pulled him into a strong embrace, and he thought she'd never let go.
When she did, he was surprised to see the tears in her eyes. She giggled lightly, wiping away the tears tenderly.
He had the same foolish grin on his face, his eyes twinkling with a secret she'd never know. He wore the same leaves and his hair hadn't grown a single inch. Peter looked exactly the same, of course. You don't grow in Neverland.
This realization made Wendy feel strange, and slightly embarrassed. She had grown, as all children do.
Tears welled up again, as many emotions ran through her.
"Don't cry, Wendy, please don't cry. Aren't you happy to see me?" He leaned over to wipe a drop streaking down her cheek.
Her voice trembled slightly, "I am, I am so happy to see you. You know I missed you greatly."
Peter had a deeply concerned look on his face. "Then why are you crying?"
She tugged at her white nightgown and searched for words on how to explain her feelings.
"Peter…"
"Yes?"
The remaining tears clouded her vision, and she wiped them back in a feverish manner.
She sighed. "Look at you Peter. You are the same as I saw you a year ago. You have not grown anywhere at all. I know this, I know that you don't grow in Neverland. I guess I had just forgotten. The thing is, I have grown. And I will continue growing, because children grow, Peter."
Peter started to get the feeling she had. "Oh…"
"I am now thirteen, and in a few years, I will have to get married. I will have to have kids and raise them, and someday die. But you will stay the same forever."
He looked very worried now. He grabbed her hand and led her to her bed. They both sat down facing each other. Her feet dainty and clear, his muddy and brown in the crevices.
He saw her blue eyes looking up at him expectantly, waiting for his reply.
He looked down, embarrassed of the words about to slip from his mouth.
"Wendy… I don't want that. I don't want you to grow up. I want you to be young with me forever."
He looked down quickly, afraid to meet her eyes after saying something so honest.
Wendy felt warmed by his words, but felt the deep knowing that that wasn't a possibility.
She gave him another hug; softer this time. Her body had calmed down, her emotions dying down. All she felt now was a gentle fondness for this sweet boy.
Peter relaxed into her, his nose buried in her dulce brown hair, which smelt of Wendy, and English rose.
He was first to pull away, this time awaiting her answer.
She saw the beautiful hope in his eyes, and didn't know how to break this to him.
"You know…", she exhaled. "I'd love to Peter. I'd love to. I'd love to be with you and never have to grow up."
He glowed; Peter absolutely glowed.
"But it's not that easy, you see." She saw his smile fading. "I have my brothers, and they need me. Not to mention my mother and father, they also need me. And I'm afraid to say, I think I need them too."
Peter's smile came back up. "Well, we can take them with us! We can all live in Neverland, all together!"
Wendy shook her head, "My father won't be fond of that idea at all. "
"You don't know that, Wendy", he pleaded, "Please try. For me, please try."
After a silence, she reluctantly agreed to try. Asking her father for this, let alone talking to him in general, was a very hard thing for her to do.
The night was calmer then, with that issue put away till morning. Peter and Wendy had snuggled up close against the headboard, enjoying each other's space.
He whispered very close to her ear, "Tell me something."
"About what?"
"Anything you'd like."
She wondered for a few seconds, then decided on a worry that was pondering in her mind.
She whispered (this was the time of night appropriate for whispering), "I'm afraid of marriage."
Peter was awfully surprised; he had only heard pleasant things about being a bride.
"I am afraid because I believe my mother was slightly clueless in choosing a man. I believe my father was, too. I don't see the love. Oh, I don't want to get married if I don't love the man."
Peter had never thought about that, and had to search for appropriate words again. "Well… why don't you marry someone you love?"
"I'm afraid if I don't choose early enough, my parents will choose for me."
He came up with a great idea, and hugged Wendy closer. "Wendy! If you aren't in love by the time it is getting too late, marry me!"
The idea was lovely, and the thought of her and Peter being together like that made her blush.
"I will", she said. "I will."
"You'll be the Lost Boys mother, and I will be their father. We will eat at a large table everyday, dance with the fairies and have picnics by the mermaids. And most importantly, you'll never have to worry about grown up things again."
She laughed at his childish, yet beautiful world of Neverland marriage. "Peter, there is much more to life than that."
"What more is there?" He cocked his head to the right like a confused puppy, and it made Wendy's heart melt.
"First off, I'd like to have my own children someday."
This proved to confuse him even more. "I don't know what you're saying. The Lost Boys will be your own children."
"Oh Peter… you must know what I'm talking about. Our children. Our very own, ones that will share both of our blood. That will have your nose and my eyes."
He looked away from her intense gaze, feeling unsettled that he didn't know what she meant.
Wendy seeing he looked uncomfortable, changed the subject. "We'll talk about that another time, alright? I'm sorry I assumed you'd know… I now see you wouldn't. Neverland is so different from here."
Peter looked back happily, not wanting to discuss that confusing subject any longer. "But please tell me another time", he said. He was a curious boy, after all.
"I promise." She blushed, knowing that conversation would be very embarrassing for her.
She quietly played with the kiss around her neck. There was still the small hole in the middle where the Lost Boys had tried to shoot her.
"Do you still have my kiss?", she whispered.
His green eyes smiled, and he pulled out her kiss from under a leaf. It shined brightly in the moonlight.
"Wendy…?"
She met his shy eyes. "Hm?"
"I really liked the thimble you gave me on the ship. I was… wondering if I could have another one. I mean, of course if you have any left."
Wendy's face warmed at his sweet innocence, and placed her hands on either side of head. She leaned in, and breathed him in. His scent brought back all the memories of the adventure she had with him, the sweet tenderness of her twelfth year. Roses and all, pressed lightly and open-mouthed against his lips. He could never ask for anything more, so he thought, then his delicate Wendy.
As she pulled away with a fresh grin, he still felt her starry breath on the tip of his tongue.
Wendy thought to herself, "Sleepless nights are a gift, after all."