Disclaimer: I do not own Card Captor Sakura.
The Cherry Blossom of My Heart
A Card Captor Sakura Fanfic
By Forsaken Tenshi
The Tokyo Tower. Our first formal meeting place. For nights now I have come here to think, to reflect, to brood over one person: Kinomoto Sakura.
She battled me, defeated me, offered to be my friend. But I'd refused. I was to be her guardian, created to protect her. But did I love her? Iie.
I am her guardian, my job is to guide and guard her, not love her. Had it been any other way, would I have loved her? I don't know. All I know is that my thoughts have all been trained on her, and her alone.
Does she love me? I've been her guardian for the past five years and I still cannot read her thoughts. She is so powerful. . . so genki. . . so. . . kawaii?!?
What am I thinking?!? A guardian cannot and must not have feelings for their master. That is how it is supposed to be. Demo. . . why do I get a warm, feverish feeling every time I see her, whether it be from my own eyes or through Yukito's? Why do I feel that constant, insistent pull of lust from deep within my heart?
Shikashi. . . she is my mistress, and I cannot do something like that to her. Never. I would have probably hated myself for eternity. I will control my feelings like a have done for so long. I will not let my emotions take over.
Demo. . . I want her so badly. . . so badly that it hurts. When she smiles at Yukito, I repeatedly tell myself she smiles at Yukito, not me. Will she ever smile that radiantly for me, and me alone?
It cannot ever be. Iya. Never. She doesn't have feelings for me. For Yukito, hai. For me, iie. I've watched as Yukito talks with Touya, my mistress' brother. I've witnessed the teasing, the torturing, the revenge constantly brewing between the Kinomoto siblings. Touya really cares for Sakura, even though he pretends not to and constantly calls her a kaijuu. I could see right through him. I've always been able to. Shikashi. . . how do I show that I really care also, without giving it away? I hate expressing my feelings.
Besides sitting here on the Tokyo Tower, I have also visited my mistress, Sakura, while she sleeps. I long to kiss her, hug her, love her. Iie. It is only a wistful longing that will never come true.
I will see my cherry blossom- tonight. I can almost smell her wondrous scent of cherry blossoms blooming in the spring in the nighttime breeze. Her window is open; I must see her. My life, my very existence, depends on her, the one I live for, breathe for, long for. She sleeps peacefully on the bed before me. Dare I kiss her and risk waking her? Hai. I lean over her, eyes closed, taking in her scent. I kiss her. She. . . kisses me back?!?
I draw back, open my eyes, and see the most unexpected sight: Sakura was. . . awake. . . Chikusho! I knew I shouldn't have done that! I stare at the floor, feeling my cheeks burn with embarrassment, shame, and anger.
"Yue-kun?"
"Forgive me, mistress." I cannot bear it. I must go, now. Go away, away to hide forever in shame.
"Yue-kun, wait!"
Punishment. I expect it after something that foolish. I stop mid-flight and turn to hover and watch her, pain welling up in my chest but hidden from my eyes.
"Hai, mistress?"
"Yue-kun. . . aishiteru."
My heart freezes. I watch her look up from the ground to lock her eye contact with mine, unwavering, strong, hopeful, loving. I feel a weight in my heart lift. I almost smile, but I manage not to. I haven't smiled since Clow died.
"It is only a crush, Mistress," I say coldly. With that I try to take off again.
"Don't leave me, Yue-kun," she pleads, grabbing my arm to ensure I couldn't escape. "Onegai, don't leave me. . ."
I glance back at her. Tears run down from her viridian eyes. But in those two beautiful eyes, there shines hope. I turn away, saying, "Mistress, I. . . I've dishonored you, shamed you. . . onegaishimasu, seal me away, forever, in the book. . ."
I can feel her body sway gently as she shakes her head. "Iie, Yue-kun, I like- iya, I love it when you are near me. At least do me that much. . ."
"I will," I reply after a long silence, still facing away from her. Still facing away, I murmur, "Aishiteru,"
"De. . . demo Yue-kun," she stammers, "I don't want to force you. . . I'll be happy if you'll just let me be your friend, not your mistress."
I slowly face her, my eyes instantly locking on to her angelic face. I feel myself floating downwards- towards her- without realizing it. I gaze deeply into her twin pools of emerald.
"Mist-"
"Sakura."
"Sakura-sama-"
"Sakura."
I sigh. "Sakura-san. . . aishiteru."
"Honto ni?" She is slightly unsure of me.
Before I realized what I was doing, I had my lips pressed to hers, my arms wrapped around her waist. I break the kiss. "Does that answer your question?"
"Hai," she breathed, smiling radiantly.
I kiss her again, passionately. Cherry blossoms. That wonderful scent. My Sakura- the flower that made my heart blossom with a new emotion- love.
~*~*~*~
Japanese Translations
Iie- no
Genki- happy
Kawaii- cute
Demo- but
Kaijuu- monster
Shikashi- but
Iya- no
Hai- yes
Chikusho- shit
Aishiteru- I love you
Onegai- please
Onegaishimasu- please [formal]
Honto ni- really
~*~*~*~
FT: Konnichiwa! I know this is kind of short. . . Gomen! ^_^;;;
Yue: Well, that _was_ short!
FT: Did I ask for _your_ opinion, lover-boy?
Yue: *blushing* I. . . I. . . what I meant was. . .
FT: Yue-kun, Yue-kun, Yue-kun. . .
Sakura: Konnichiwa Yue-kun!
Yue: *blushing even harder* Kon. . . konnichiwa, Sakura-sama. . .
Sakura: *rolls eyes* How many times must I tell you, Yue-kun? It's Sakura without the -sama.
Yue: . . .
FT: Well, then! *cough cough* Review, onegai?
~*~*~*~
The Cherry Blossom of My Heart
A Card Captor Sakura Fanfic
By Forsaken Tenshi
The Tokyo Tower. Our first formal meeting place. For nights now I have come here to think, to reflect, to brood over one person: Kinomoto Sakura.
She battled me, defeated me, offered to be my friend. But I'd refused. I was to be her guardian, created to protect her. But did I love her? Iie.
I am her guardian, my job is to guide and guard her, not love her. Had it been any other way, would I have loved her? I don't know. All I know is that my thoughts have all been trained on her, and her alone.
Does she love me? I've been her guardian for the past five years and I still cannot read her thoughts. She is so powerful. . . so genki. . . so. . . kawaii?!?
What am I thinking?!? A guardian cannot and must not have feelings for their master. That is how it is supposed to be. Demo. . . why do I get a warm, feverish feeling every time I see her, whether it be from my own eyes or through Yukito's? Why do I feel that constant, insistent pull of lust from deep within my heart?
Shikashi. . . she is my mistress, and I cannot do something like that to her. Never. I would have probably hated myself for eternity. I will control my feelings like a have done for so long. I will not let my emotions take over.
Demo. . . I want her so badly. . . so badly that it hurts. When she smiles at Yukito, I repeatedly tell myself she smiles at Yukito, not me. Will she ever smile that radiantly for me, and me alone?
It cannot ever be. Iya. Never. She doesn't have feelings for me. For Yukito, hai. For me, iie. I've watched as Yukito talks with Touya, my mistress' brother. I've witnessed the teasing, the torturing, the revenge constantly brewing between the Kinomoto siblings. Touya really cares for Sakura, even though he pretends not to and constantly calls her a kaijuu. I could see right through him. I've always been able to. Shikashi. . . how do I show that I really care also, without giving it away? I hate expressing my feelings.
Besides sitting here on the Tokyo Tower, I have also visited my mistress, Sakura, while she sleeps. I long to kiss her, hug her, love her. Iie. It is only a wistful longing that will never come true.
I will see my cherry blossom- tonight. I can almost smell her wondrous scent of cherry blossoms blooming in the spring in the nighttime breeze. Her window is open; I must see her. My life, my very existence, depends on her, the one I live for, breathe for, long for. She sleeps peacefully on the bed before me. Dare I kiss her and risk waking her? Hai. I lean over her, eyes closed, taking in her scent. I kiss her. She. . . kisses me back?!?
I draw back, open my eyes, and see the most unexpected sight: Sakura was. . . awake. . . Chikusho! I knew I shouldn't have done that! I stare at the floor, feeling my cheeks burn with embarrassment, shame, and anger.
"Yue-kun?"
"Forgive me, mistress." I cannot bear it. I must go, now. Go away, away to hide forever in shame.
"Yue-kun, wait!"
Punishment. I expect it after something that foolish. I stop mid-flight and turn to hover and watch her, pain welling up in my chest but hidden from my eyes.
"Hai, mistress?"
"Yue-kun. . . aishiteru."
My heart freezes. I watch her look up from the ground to lock her eye contact with mine, unwavering, strong, hopeful, loving. I feel a weight in my heart lift. I almost smile, but I manage not to. I haven't smiled since Clow died.
"It is only a crush, Mistress," I say coldly. With that I try to take off again.
"Don't leave me, Yue-kun," she pleads, grabbing my arm to ensure I couldn't escape. "Onegai, don't leave me. . ."
I glance back at her. Tears run down from her viridian eyes. But in those two beautiful eyes, there shines hope. I turn away, saying, "Mistress, I. . . I've dishonored you, shamed you. . . onegaishimasu, seal me away, forever, in the book. . ."
I can feel her body sway gently as she shakes her head. "Iie, Yue-kun, I like- iya, I love it when you are near me. At least do me that much. . ."
"I will," I reply after a long silence, still facing away from her. Still facing away, I murmur, "Aishiteru,"
"De. . . demo Yue-kun," she stammers, "I don't want to force you. . . I'll be happy if you'll just let me be your friend, not your mistress."
I slowly face her, my eyes instantly locking on to her angelic face. I feel myself floating downwards- towards her- without realizing it. I gaze deeply into her twin pools of emerald.
"Mist-"
"Sakura."
"Sakura-sama-"
"Sakura."
I sigh. "Sakura-san. . . aishiteru."
"Honto ni?" She is slightly unsure of me.
Before I realized what I was doing, I had my lips pressed to hers, my arms wrapped around her waist. I break the kiss. "Does that answer your question?"
"Hai," she breathed, smiling radiantly.
I kiss her again, passionately. Cherry blossoms. That wonderful scent. My Sakura- the flower that made my heart blossom with a new emotion- love.
~*~*~*~
Japanese Translations
Iie- no
Genki- happy
Kawaii- cute
Demo- but
Kaijuu- monster
Shikashi- but
Iya- no
Hai- yes
Chikusho- shit
Aishiteru- I love you
Onegai- please
Onegaishimasu- please [formal]
Honto ni- really
~*~*~*~
FT: Konnichiwa! I know this is kind of short. . . Gomen! ^_^;;;
Yue: Well, that _was_ short!
FT: Did I ask for _your_ opinion, lover-boy?
Yue: *blushing* I. . . I. . . what I meant was. . .
FT: Yue-kun, Yue-kun, Yue-kun. . .
Sakura: Konnichiwa Yue-kun!
Yue: *blushing even harder* Kon. . . konnichiwa, Sakura-sama. . .
Sakura: *rolls eyes* How many times must I tell you, Yue-kun? It's Sakura without the -sama.
Yue: . . .
FT: Well, then! *cough cough* Review, onegai?
~*~*~*~