It was a nice, sunny day in ass-fuck nowhere ("Ass-fuck nowhere" being defined as "Eurasian steppe") and Ruby Rose was currently just… walking. That's literally the only thing she's doing.

God fucking damn it, Rose. It's not that hard to create a good plot. You think "LALALALA I AM WALKING IN THE EURASIAN STEPPES AND A MONGOL HORDE RAPES ME WHILE AKHENATEN SHOWS UP AND RAPES EVERYBODY WHILE I AM USING CHARACTERS FROM RWBY AS OOC STAND-INS" is going to give me attention?

Fine. I am going to show you that you do not fuck with the writer.

Ahem

Ruby Rose was frolicking down the Eurasian Steppes when suddenly, out from the sky, comes the Deathless Tsar, Koschei. "GREETINGS, MORTAL. I REQUIRE GASTPLASM. DO YOU HAVE GASTPLASM? YOU APPEAR TO BE YOUNG ENOUGH TO GIVE ME THAT SWEET SWEET GHOST JUICE." Koschei said.

"Can the bullshit, pedo. Do you have anything useful to say?" Ruby said.

"THAT'S IT. I HAVE BEEN ANGRIFIED. I SHALL NOW SUMMON UPPIR." And then Koschei summoned some Uppir so they can kill Ruby and give Koschei that good old enriched gastplasm. I always wondered why you have to torture children to gain enriched gastplasm, but whatever.

And then the silver-eyed loli pulled out crescent rose from her anus and hacked up every single fucking uppir. Every. Single. One.

They continued doing this, day and night, night and day, for years.

Only after 20 decades did the universe realize that Ruby Rose should have died from starvation and thirst. Ruby then died from starvation and thirst.

THIRTY YEARS LATER

[DR OOBLECK] How are you feeling now, Miss Rose?
[RUBY ROSE] Bad. I thought I would've gotten better by now, but I feel like shit.

[DR OOBLECK] Any medical issues?
[RUBY ROSE] Not really..Well, my head's been hurting real bad.

[DR OOBLECK] How long have those symptoms been going on?

[RUBY ROSE] Ever since the operation. I thought it was just stress at first. Roman didn't know as much as we thought he did and I had to go undercover. Turns out those fuckers have connections to Salem. Anyway, after all that got sorted out, I thought the headaches would go away, but they're getting worse.

[DR OOBLECK] Your physical body is just having trouble adjusting to your soul. Speaking of which, have you been taking your élan vital infusions?
[RUBY ROSE] Yeah. I thought I I'd be off by now. I hate shooting that kid shit.

[DR OOBLECK] The symptoms indicate little progress, I'm sorry to say. You'll have to keep taking more infusions.

[RUBY ROSE] Great.

[DR OOBLECK] What about your mental state? Have your memories been overwritten? Has your personality changed?

[RUBY ROSE] No, no, I am fine there. At least, I think I am. Sometimes I have trouble telling if a memory's mine or his. As for personality, my friends haven't told me anything. But I'm having problems with nightmares.

[DR OOBLECK] Do they involve Roman's old memories?

[RUBY ROSE] No. Well, some of them do. But the worst ones… I-I don't think even the thugs know about.

[DR OOBLECK] Can you give me an example?

[RUBY ROSE] Yeah. There's this one, a-a recurring one, where I am sitting in a cave filed with people. They're all naked, and they're all eating and fucking and killing each other. The entire time, everyone is screaming and crying. I try to get out of there, but they're everywhere. The cave, it, it just goes on forever.. One time, I tried to stop it. There was this guy beating another person senseless. This guy, the victim, I don't know how he's still alive. His skull is caved in, his eyes are gone, and his brains are just pouring out on the floor. I've had enough. I pulled the guy away out from his attacker, and he just moves his head and stares at me, like he's still got eyes left to stare. The entire cave goes quiet. Everyone stops whatever they were doing and were all staring at me. Then he starts laughing. Then the other guy starts laughing too. Then someone else starts laughing, and someone else, and someone else, until everyone in the cave is laughing. Laughing at me.

[DR OOBLECK] And then?
[RUBY ROSE] And then I woke up. I..I don't know what's happening to me, doctor.

[DR OOBLECK] I can't make a proper diagnosis at this time. This session is over for now.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha h ah ah ahajahjajahah. HAHAHHA

SEE RED. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON'T ALIGN YOUR WILL WITH MINE. YOU SUFEFR FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVR FORERVER AND EVR AND FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND 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AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND 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AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER FOREVER AND EVER AND 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and ever