It's a nice day today. The sun is reflecting off the lake, the birds are chirping and there's the smell of spring is in the air. My arm is wrapped around Sayori's shoulders and her head is resting on my chest. It had been a month since the incident happened, and Sayori's mental health seemed to have gotten better over that month. I looked down at her. She was smiling a sweet smile; it was her genuine one. Cute. I look back out at the lake to see a group of swans landing and settling on the water's surface.
"I'm glad I found you that day Sayori" I say. I look back down at her, but something was off. She looked, different. Her skin…it was deathly pale. I hear her giggle, normally hearing that would make me happy, but this one sounded manic. Something was wrong. Very wrong.
"you didn't find me Ash" she says as she looks up at me. her eyes were voids of black. Her face was devoid of colour and life. her skin was peeling off in places revealing white flesh underneath. "I'm still hanging in my room" she says and giggles. A smile envelopes her face as she says, "come find me". those words start reverberating around my head over and over again.
come find me
Come find me
Come find me
COME FIND ME
I wake up screaming and thrashing. It takes me a few seconds to calm down. I'm on the floor for some reason, I probably kicked myself off the bed. My sight is hindered by the tears in my eyes. I curl myself up into a ball and start to break down. Big ugly tears roll down my face. I don't care. I feel helpless. I let my body convulse as I cough and splutter and cry. After a while the tears stop coming and I just lie there. I don't want to get up. I don't want to do anything. I just…I don't know. I push myself into a sitting position with my back resting against the side of the bed. I pull my legs toward my torso and wrap my arms around myself. I rest my head on my knees. Everything felt hopeless and desolate. Nothing was going to get better, no matter how much time passed by. It was hard to think, or to concentrate, so I just sat there. Shivering and shaking. I don't know how much time passed but light started to filter through my window. Soon enough, my phone started to vibrate. Clearly Sayori was up now. I didn't have the energy to talk to her right now though. I felt empty and emotionless. I probably need to take a shower, maybe that would breath some life back into me. I pull off my clothes and grab my towel to go take a shower. I get in and turn the dial to hot, hot water does not come out though. It's cold, so very cold. I wait for a while to see if it warms up. it doesn't. Great. Just great. I turn the shower off and get out, colder and emptier than before. I dry myself off, go back to my room and put some clean clothes on. While I do so I hear my front door open. it was probably Sayori coming to check up on me. She had the spare key to my house, and I guess she had a right to be worried. I hadn't messaged her yet when I normally reply instantly. I sighed as I pulled a shirt over my head and tried to prepare myself in vain hope, I wouldn't break down in front of her. I hear her knock on my bedroom door.
"Hey Ash, you okay?" I hear her ask softly through the door. I try to say something back, but I feel a lump in my throat. After a few seconds of silence, I see the door handle move and the door swung open. She was dressed like normal, a pink shirt and blue shorts except the happy smile she normally wore was replaced by a face of worry and pain. I felt bad for not messaging her and telling her that I was okay but then again, was I?
"I-I'm sorry" I say, I could feel myself starting to choke up. I probably look a mess, even with a shower and some clean clothes it wouldn't make my bloodshot eyes and tired expression. Sayori doesn't say anything, she just walks towards me and envelops me in a hug. I can't take it anymore. I start to cry into her shoulder as I hug her back. We stand there for a while as I break down. I must seem like a total idiot, but I'm so glad that I have her in my life. I don't know what I would do with myself without her. She was a gift to this world, even if she couldn't realize it. After a while I manage to calm myself down and I pull away though Sayori takes my hands in hers and doesn't let me back away too much. I can see from her face that at some point she had started crying too. God I was an Jerk. If I had just texted her, she wouldn't have been worried. She wouldn't have seen all of this. It wasn't fair for her to have to deal with my problems as well as hers. I feel my eyes start to water again, but before I could start crying again she pulls me away from my thoughts.
"So what happened?" she asked while removing one of her hands from mine and wiping a stray tear from my face. My heart fluttered when she did that, I'm not sure why. She had done things like that so many times before. it's not like I like her or anything.
"I-uh…I had a nightmare" I say, stupidly. Gee that sounded pathetic. I must look a wreak right now, hopefully Sayori wouldn't tell anyone about this I knew I could trust her, but she tended to blab a bit.
"you should have said, I was worried sick" she says, the sad smile she wore before turned into a halfheated pout.
"I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you" I say, not exactly sure how to make it up to her. I think for a second then I get an idea. "have you had breakfast yet?" I ask, she shakes her head. Of course she hasn't, she came to make sure you were okay you selfish shit-biscuit I think to myself. Gee my subconscious really wasn't holding back. "I'll make you some then" I say, regretting my words the second they come out of my mouth. I was an okay cook. Kinda. Not really. I could just about heat up food and boil pasta so, making breakfast was going to be a stretch for me. though, Sayori's face did seem to brighten up a bit, and I didn't want to take her happiness away, so I guess I better not screw up. actually, knowing Sayori shed eat anything I gave her so I shouldn't worry too much, I guess.
We walk downstairs and into the kitchen, Sayori sits down on one of the chairs whilst I busy myself getting out pans and turning the hobs on. I had decided to make scrambled eggs, simply because it was the only breakfasty-thing I knew how to make. Sayori was strangely silent right now, but I wouldn't hold it to her. I wasn't in the mood to chat right now either. At some point I must have gotten lost in my thoughts and let my body go on autopilot as I didn't realize Sayori had gotten up from her chair until I felt her arms wrap around my waist. I stiffened up at her touch (and not in the sexual way you perverts) but quickly relaxed again. After a couple of seconds, I felt her bury her face into my back. her breath was warm and ticklish, yet soothing. It brought…impure thoughts to my mind, but I banished them as soon as they came. Sayori was my friend…nothing more. before I could dig myself a deeper and dirtier hole in my mind, I heard Sayori mumble something, but I couldn't quite make out what she was saying due to her voice being muffled by my shirt. I decided to ignore it and just keep on cooking. After a while the eggs were done and I needed to move from the spot where I was standing to go and get the pepper, but I couldn't move with Sayori hugging me like this.
"Sayori, you gotta let go, I need to move" I say while turning off the hob. Clearly Sayori was not in the mood to be cooperative as she simply hugged me tighter and complained about being comfy.
"come on Sayori, don't make me tickle you" I say. There's no response, she just pulls herself closer to me. Fine, if that's how it's going to be. I reach behind me until my hands find their way under Sayori's shirt and to her sides. Immediately she squeals and let's go of me. I turn around and look at her. She's leaning on the table while bending over slightly with her arms covering her sides. She has a pout on her face, but I can see the smile hidden underneath and I can't help but grin.
"meanie" she says half-halfheartedly.
"love you too" I say sarcastically whilst walking to get the pepper shaker. Only when I pick up the shaker do I realize what I had said. I feel a slight blush spread across my cheeks. Hopefully it wasn't too obvious, though knowing my luck it definitely was. I turned back to go season and serve the eggs, but I fail to notice a wet patch on the floor. I step on it and put too much weight through my foot. My leg slides out in front of me and I get pitched backward. I try to reach for something, but my hands grab at empty space. Idiot I manage to think to myself. Nice to words of encouragement right before I hit the floor. I hear a loud crack as my head hits the ground and everything goes dark.
The doctors explained everything to me. I was scared at what it meant; my whole life was going to be changed from now on wards. I didn't really know what to think, though for now I couldn't really think at all. The nurse said I had visitors. I moved myself out of a lying position and into a sitting one with my legs dangling off the side hospital bed. I absentmindedly pick at a seam in the beds stitching as I wait, but before long I hear the door to my recovery room open. I look up as four girls pile in, they all look like they just came from school. Before I can say anything one of them runs up to me and hugs me.
"Oh my god I'm so happy you're okay, we were so worried, you hit your head really hard" she rambles on like this for a little while still hugging me. I don't hug her back; I just sit there awkwardly waiting until she stops. Eventually she does and pulls away. When she does, she sees the look on my face. "What's wrong?" she asks. I look at her and I feel a sense of hopelessness, this was going to crush them much more than it would me.
"Well, I'm not actually okay" I say, a sad tone in my voice. The girl who hugged me stepped back towards the rest of the group. They all look at me with worried and expectant expressions. God this was going to be rough.
"what do you mean?" one of them asks. She was taller than the rest of the group and looked like the eldest.
"I don't remember you" I say. "I don't remember anything".