Forget The World, a degrassi fanfic

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi, or Snow Patrol's lyrics.

I got the Snow Patrol CD for Christmas and wow, does it ever scream Crellie to me. The lyrics are from various songs. I guess I'm a fan of these one shots lately. This is my insight on Craig's addiction. I guess I try to answer some questions. Maybe. The pacing is weird in this one too. But I hope you enjoy. And Happy New Year!

Warning: Speculation. Inspired by previews.Also, there are drug references. It's kind of some heavy stuff. Just letting everyone know.

i want to be the car crash.

The first time was peer pressure from his band mates.

"C'mon man, just do it!" his drummer said.

"Dude, it's the ultimate high." his bass player added. Then he let out an awkward cough. "Besides, he chicks love it."

Craig stared at the joint.

One time couldn't hurt, right? Besides, he was a rock star now. Wasn't this what rock stars did?

a magic trick makes the world disappear.

The next few times, it was just to make everything go away. The pestering record executives who always wanted something different from him. Leo, who just kept him going, and going, and going. Because "I didn't take a chance on you to have you screw up now, kid." Manny and her whiney phone calls about how she missed him but had tried to sound all supportive, or whatever. He just wanted it all gone. And that little joint did wonders.

train this chaos.

It became routine.

A couple of groupies, a great show, and some coke. Perfect. Routine.

The world was gone. And he went to a place where he could just float.

Float and then crash and burn the next day. But it became okay. It became routine. It became trained chaos.

somehow everything I own smells of you.

He had to come back. It's like she was calling, even though she was the only one who didn't. She was the only one who actually told him to go, and that she'd be okay without him.

Manny cried. And cried. Oh, and yep, cried some more. Over the phone, on Emma's shoulder, and sometimes to the silence in her room.

Ellie cried. Once. For a second or two. And then stopping when she realized that it was no use and he was better off doing what he loved anyhow.

But he came back. To see her, although that's not what he told everyone else.

And he kept doing it. Because it wasn't just something he did sometimes to get a high once in a while.

Now it was an addiction. It was hunger. It was something he needed.

Or so he believed.

Because that's the type of grasp it had on him now. It was in control.

It was in control when Manny found him. And her big brown eyes welled up in tears because she "couldn't believe that he thought she was that stupid and wouldn't notice."

It was in control when Ellie saw the first time in the garage. Because he had called her while he was still himself and told her to come over. And then hey, why not take a puff or two while he waited? A puff or two wouldn't do anything. But a puff or two turned into three and then wow the entire thing was gone. And Ellie walked in all cute and tired looking and apologized for being late because she had a deadline to meet. And he kissed her on impulse because hey he was thinking about doing it for a while and why not now? And despite being tired Ellie was Ellie and knew something was up. So she pushed him off and took in his pot breath and then slapped him because he had no right to do what he did. Especially not when he was high.

But no, he wasn't high. Or that's what he tried to tell her. But she wasn't a child, and walked out of the garage, tears welling up in her eyes because for a second there, she had kissed him back.

And then she cried because for the past five months she had been trying to forget all about him and be happy with someone she didn't love but pretended to. Which confirmed that the past five months had been a lie because she still loved the boy in the garage who was high on drugs.

you weren't happy the day I watched you go.

He lay in a hospital bed because the first time turned into countless and finally when alcohol was mixed in, he hit rock bottom.

Ellie Nash sat in his room, unwilling to go home, or leave when visiting hours were over and the staff were sympathetic because even though she didn't say it, you could tell she loved this boy. It was something in her eyes and the way she looked at him. It was also because the last time she saw him, she had slapped him and left and had to be here when he woke up, but she didn't tell anyone that.

Because of his OD, when he finally woke up it was three days later and Ellie still hadn't eaten anything and her hair was all greasy from not showering for almost five days. But she didn't care. And somehow she knew Craig didn't either.

He woke up to her holding his hand and lying next to him because she maybe thought that would help somewhat.

"Ellie?" he croaked weakly. Fresh tears formed in her eyes but this time it was from happiness and fear and maybe a bit of everything else mixed in.

"Yeah, Manning?"

"Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital," she swallowed.

"Why?"

She didn't want to be the one to tell him.

"Because. Because you overdosed."

He nodded slowly.

"Are you happy?" he asked suddenly. She knew it was a drugged question.

"Yes." She was. Happy he was alive. Happy he was next to her talking, even if it wasn't completely competent.

"Really? You weren't the last time I saw you."

She let out a sigh of relief seeing that his memory wasn't completely wiped out and she'd decide to take this as a good sign.

hit me hard enough to wake me.

Craig left the hospital and the overdose was a wake up call. That and seeing the people he loved grieving for him.

Ellie isn't with Jesse any longer. Her wake up call came when Craig came back. And her even bigger wake up call came in the hospital, when there was a chance he'd never come back.

Jesse didn't deserve being lied to. Not when she loved someone else. Not when she couldn't help but love someone else. Not when she had never quite stopped.

Manny left that day that she saw Craig high. She did visit the hospital once. But when she saw Ellie's crying body hunched over Craig's unconscious one, she knew she had lost the war. She never bothered coming back.

pray that something picks me up.

The day he got out of the hospital was an eventful and confusing one. Ellie went home with him to Joey's house.

There was a machine message from Leo yelling "wherethehellisCraigandwhyhasn'thecalled?"

Craig just kind of smiled to himself, deleted it, and inquired when dinner was.

Ellie sat down on the cough and held Angie in her lap. Craig scratched the back of his neck and observed the scene and somehow he knew everything would be okay. As long as Ellie stuck around.

would you lie with me. and just forget the world.

"Craig, stop!"

"Why? You know you like it."

Ellie was draped over Craig's shoulder with a very nice view of his behind.

"Because…oh fine. I give up."

"Ha."

"You know, we'll never set up the furniture if you always keep doing this!"

"So we won't have furniture. We'll be oriental and sit on the floor to eat."

Ellie smiled. If this is what it was going to be like to live with Craig, she was excited.

He had gone to rehab and came out six months later sober.

Everyday was hard. And scary. And it still is.

But now they've been together almost three and a half years, and hey, buying an apartment in New York City wasn't a bad idea at all. Ellie was interning for The New York Times. And Craig was recording on his own time in a small underground studio.

Major labels weren't his thing. And he discovered that he liked the underground rock star way of life a lot better. No more annoying paparazzi following him around and no more groupies to deal with.

He comes home to Ellie everyday and couldn't wish for anything more.

She makes him forget the world. And smells like a mixture of vanilla and coffee while she's doing it.

Fin. Let me know what ya thought. Reviews would be very much appreciated.