Prompt: "Drunk Regina wants Gold so badly and she annoys everyone in storybrook season by season?"

Rated M because I prefer this rating. There might be sex or sexual acts or just a lot of cussing and drunk whining. We'll see!

Characters in this chapter: Emma, Ruby, Regina. Mentioned Gold, bookworm.

Season One: After Finale

Regina kicked off her shoes, leaning back and placing the bottle of apple brandy between her legs, the cool glass on the bottle sending a chill up her spine. A pout played at her lips as she began to move her feet, stretching her toes - the sensation relaxing. She had been here for longer than she could even remember, having thought it would be a nice place to get lost with her bottle - only to find out that drinking alone at here is just as bad as drinking alone at home.

Magic had come to Storybrooke all thanks to Gold and his drive to continue a power play with her, the notion alone that Belle would even remember who she was made her skin crawl. She had locked her away for a reason and a very good one at that. "Can I get you something to drink? Like coffee?" Ruby had walked up to where Regina sat on the floor of Granny's diner, back against the counter. "I think you should sober up a little.."

"Me? Sober up a little?" She cackled, one of the laughs that belonged to the Evil Queen and it felt good, it felt like biting into a delicious red apple for the first time and allowing it's nectar to run down your chin. Fuck; she was getting more aroused than she was just seconds ago. "Funny for you to say, you're not in a constant battle for power with your teacher. Not to mention when he wears leather pants the entire time he teaches you...it's really hard to learn anything." She brought the bottle up to her lips and took a generous sip, allowing the liquid to sooth her buzzing frame. "Coffee can't help me. Coffee could never even touch ANYTHING that I'm feeling. Now if you don't mind, go the fuck away or I'll...I'll.." She held out her palm and conjured up a flame, it flickered a few seconds and then fizzled out. "You get the gist. Scram!"

Ruby sighed and headed towards a booth to take someone's order, muttering something about evil queens and getting what they are due under her breath.

Regina ignored it, as she always had done when any peasant tried to make her feel bad. That was something Rumple taught her. A whine rose up in her throat as she furrowed her brow and hugged the bottle closer. "Dumb imp. Getting his bookworm back. I want to flay her alive. I want to rip her flesh from her bones and pluck her like a chicken." Stumbling, she pushed herself up onto her bare feet and bound out of the diner and onto the road, not the sidewalk. She hadn't even realized someone was behind her until she heard a honk, glancing back she caught sight of the yellow bug. "Emma!" She walked up to the hood and began to messily climb onto it, raising herself up near the windshield and giving it a tap then three, vigorously losing count. "Emma! I need you to take me to see the green man. I need to see that vile malevolent imp. Emma! Emma, can you hear me? Don't act like you can't, I know you can. I'm loud enough to wake the whole street!" She screamed out, glancing around as if begging someone to test her tonight. "Emma! Emma go on, I'll hold on tight." She turned then and gripped onto the mirror nearest the drivers side, blocking Emma's view. The blonde climbed out of the bug and put her hands on her hips.

"Are you serious? Get off of the hood, Regina. Now."

"I want to go to the imp. I can't walk, I have no shoes."

"Why do you want to go to Gold's? Isn't his shop close anyway?"

"I need to go to his house, Emma. His house. Not the shop."

"Regina, you're drunk, I don't think that would be a good idea." The blonde could practically get drunk off of the smell alone pouring from the mayor. "I need to take you home."

"If you won't take me, I'll walk then. You're supposed to be the savior, you're supposed to save people, in order to save me you have to take me to him. I need to show him exactly how much power I have so he'll want to play the games we used to play. Oh Emma, we used to have so much fun. I'm talking crumbling castles fun, burning villages to the ground after fucking like animals. I'm talkin-"

"I-I get it, Regina. You fucked Gold. Gross, ugh, he's a villain."

"I'm a fucking villain!"

"I'm not letting anyone see you like this." Emma took out her handcuffs and placed them along the brunette's wrists, pulling her off of the hood and helping her into the backseat of the yellow bug. "I'm taking you to the station."

"I always wanted to try handcuffs with Rumple but he preferred shackles. The chains were harder to break."

"How did you even know that handcuffs existed?"

"He had some from a realm I had no idea was this one. I used to love looking at his collection. He had a large estate." The chuckle that echoed from the backseat was unmistakably from the innuendo she had made.

"I don't want to know-"

"Emma. Emma. Emma. I'm talking huge. Not like Graham. No. No. Nnnnnooo. Not at all like Graham. That estate of his knows how to pull out all of the stops and I'm not talking actually pulling out, Emma, you don't want him to pull out because when it rains it pours. You know what I mean?" Regina had begun kicking the back of Emma's seat as she vocalized her "huh, huh,huhs"

"Yeah. I get it, Regina. I don't want to, but I do."

"And you know...I'd never had anyone fuck me in the ass before, but Emmaaaaa." She groaned, moving her legs and trying to squeeze her thighs as hard as possible to alleviate some of the throbbing going on between them. "..oh God! It was phenomenal. You know, he said no one had ever let him fuck them there? He'd always wanted to try and ohhhh" The noise emitting from her chest was more akin to a growl now as she fell over in the seat, rubbing her cheek against the leather seats and imagining it as his lap. "...did we try. Again and again and again."

"Sounds like you need to have some personal time instead of wandering the streets trying to find someone who is taken, Regina."

"Pshh. I tried that. Twice at home, once outside of his shop - he wasn't there, and a third at the diner. Not nearly as earth shattering as the ones he brings me to. And magic is back, Emma. It's back and he has the upper hand and I want the upper hand but if it makes him as horny as it does me - he can have it. He can have ALLLLL of it."

Emma pulled over at the station, climbed out of the bug, opened the backdoor, gripped Regina by the arm and pulled her out onto her feet.

"Can you call him? Tell him I've been taken in...put behind bars and shackled? Oh he'd like that. He'd be here before I could say Rumple...Rumplestiltskin."

"Good to know. And no, I'm not calling him." Emma guided her into a cell, removed the handcuffs and closed the door. Heading towards the door, she called back over her shoulder "Use the time to sober up, Mayor. I'll be back in the morning."