Disclaimer: I don't own Life With Derek, nor the prompt given to me by I.S.
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Of Legwarmers, Marbles, and Cottage Cheese.
By VirgoMaiden
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"What," Casey McDonald said slowly, stepping into the kitchen, "are you eating?"
"Cottage cheese," Derek Venturi said, taking a swing from a milk jug.
"But that's a milk container," she said plainly.
"Yeah," he said, "So?"
"Cottage cheese doesn't come in a milk container."
"It comes from milk!" he protested.
"After fermenting, or something," she said.
"Then it will 'ferment' in my stomach," he said plainly, taking a final swing and putting the now-empty container in the fridge. "You know me – I'm one for the 'big picture.'"
"Uh-huh," she said dubiously, looking at him up and down.
Which allowed her to get a better look at what he was wearing.
"What are you wearing?" she asked again.
He raised an eyebrow. "…Pants?"
"Well, hopefully," she said. "Obviously. I meant those."
He looked down at his legs. "You mean these?" He lifted a leg up onto the island.
"Yes," she said pointedly. "Those. Are those legwarmers?"
"Heck yeah," he said. "I think that the electric pink really brings out the definition in my abs."
She blushed, noticing for the first time that his shirt was indeed off, and that his abs really were defined. She tried to give him a queer look and stuttered, "If your flavor of the week wasn't coming over tonight, then I would totally be questioning your sexuality."
He smiled suggestively. "You know you want me," he said smugly.
She looked down at the ground, clearly embarrassed. "I want no such thing!" she protested.
"Uh-huh," he said, clearly disbelieving it.
"What are you doing with those things on, anyway?" she asked, trying to change the subject.
"Oh, these things? Julie's taking me out ice skating. And I thought that they could help improve my hockey form."
"Your 'form' is just fine, Der," she quipped, pushing past him to the refrigerator. "And I don't see how the legwarmers will help you."
"Aw," he said quietly, leaning down, his mouth level with her ear, "I'm glad that you like my form so much, Case; it takes a lot of work to be as pretty as me."
"I'm so sure," she said. "Now, did you eat all of the cake from last night?"
He shrugged. "Maybe I did, maybe Edwin did, maybe Lizzie, Marti, Dad, or your mom did. Why? Aren't you on another diet?"
She sighed. "I'm off it. It was a total failure. Again."
"Huh," he said. "Well, if it helps, you're not too fat."
She gave him a look. "Thanks, Derek. That's real encouraging."
She decided to settle for a pear and, sitting down at the island, joined her.
"You wanna play some board games?" he asked.
She gave him a wary look. "…Why?"
"Because the last time that I saw the list, we were tied at sixty-seven and a half."
She grinned at him. "Then of course; what is it this time? Clue? Monopoly?"
"Clue this time," he said, standing up and heading to the living room. "Monopoly takes way too long."
"Then get ready for some serious butt-whooping," she said.
"You said that about The Great Jumprope Tourney of '08."
"Must you remind me of it?"
"Always," he said, dragging out the box and shooting her a cheesy smile.
--
"Yes!" Derek crowed, his firsts in the air. "I win – again!"
Casey stared, dumbfounded, at the board in front of her. "…But it goes against every piece of logic in the book," she whispered.
"Face it, Case," Derek said, grinning and settling back in his chair. "I'm just smarter than you."
"You got lucky!" she retorted hotly.
"Twelve times," he said grandly.
"Well – you – I - You can't win at marbles!" she shot back.
He glared at her. "Oh, you wanna play this game now?" he asked.
"Yeah, I wanna play this game."
"Fine. You and me. Back yard. Fifteen minutes. Bring your marbles."
"You're on," she said.
--
"So," Nora said, sipping her lemonade and watching the disaster unfurl before her eyes, "What's this about now?"
"Casey and Derek had a tied score for The List," Lizzie said briskly, "so to break the tie, they decided to play Clue."
"Oh, no," George sighed, shaking his head. "Derek mastered that game when he was six."
"Casey didn't know that," Edwin said, "so she lost. Twelve times. In a row."
"Which brings us here," Marti finished. "On the porch. At four o'clock. Watching them play marbles."
"It's a good thing that this is summer," Nora said. "Otherwise I'd be worried about how they were going to sleep tonight." Then, as an afterthought, added, "And what's with those hot pink legwarmers?"
"Ssht!" Edwin whispered, holding his hand up, cutting her off, "I think that Casey's on Derek's last marble!"
The family hushed and watched the game taking place before them. Derek and Casey were both hunched over in the dirt, their noses almost rubbing the ground, their thumbs red from all of the shooting.
Casey took aim, fired…
And hit it.
Derek's last marble, a nice one of a cobalt blue, rolled out of the ring slowly, in a sort of exaggerated slo-mo, and his jaw comically dropped down.
"No!" he shouted at the same time that Casey cried, "Yes!"
"I won!" she shouted, "I flipping won! Ha ha ha! That's for beating me at Clue!"
"Yeah, yeah, McDonald," Derek said, trying to seem uncaring as she did a victory dance of sorts before him. "Don't wet your pants now."
She glared at him. "You're so childish," she said.
"You're such a prude!"
"How does that relate to a child?!"
"You look like both of them!"
The family slowly began to troop back into the house, not wanting to get into another Derek-Casey fight, but they didn't get too far before Casey shot back a "Fine!" and stomped back into the house.
Derek was quiet for a minute, defeated.
"Ooh," Edwin called out. "Burn."
The glare that Derek gave Edwin was enough to shut him up and make him run for the safe vicinity of his room.
--
Derek gave Casey a wary look as he sat on the couch next to her. She pretended not to notice him.
"Pride and Prejudice, eh?" he asked.
"For those of us who have read the book before," she sniffed.
"Hey, hey," he said, holding up his hands. "I come in peace."
She gave him a wary look before finally relenting and settling next to him. "Fine," she said, "but one snarky remark and you're out, Mister."
"Are you trying to act like you want me?" he teased.
"Oh, as if," she said. "Now, focus; Elizabeth Bennet is calling Mr. Darcy's bad attitude out."
It was quiet for ten minutes after that, as Elizabeth subtly insulted Mr. Darcy and made her way back to the party. Already, he could tell that she – Elizabeth – hated him - Darcy.
"Where's Julie?" Casey asked suddenly.
He shrugged. "Dunno. I called her and told her that I was too busy tonight to go ice skating; maybe next weekend. Then she hung up on me."
She giggled. "Wait, busy?" she asked. "As in 'I don't-wanna-pay-for-the-date' busy, or 'I'm-actually-busy-trying-to-kick-my-sister's-ass' busy?"
"Step-sister," he corrected automatically, but she acted like she didn't hear.
"Aw," she said jokingly, hugging his arm. "You're too sweet, Der."
"That's me," he sighed. "Mr. Sweetness, right here."
"But of course," she said, and kissed his cheek.
He smirked and turned his head to face her. "You mind repeating that action on my oh-too-fine lips?"
She smiled. "Maybe later, champ," she said and stood up, going upstairs. "Depends how I feel in the morning."
He sat there for about five minutes, her last words ringing in his head, before running to the other room where the chart was kept and wrote, under Casey's meticulous tally, "SCORE TIMES INFINITY" underneath. The next morning, when Casey looked at it and asked him why it was there, he merely shrugged and pretended not to know, a smile threatening to break his face in half.
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A/N: Sorry if the ending seems to be too rushed. This goes along in the same "universe" as the "Pickleball" story where the two of them keep a tally of all of the victories that the two have had : D VM