Sometimes in April Chapter 1: A City of Lost Dreams, a yu-gi-oh fanfic

Sometimes in April

Rating: T Genre: Romance/General

Summary: Seto Kaiba has always been known relentless workaholic but when his brother and doctor force him to take a vacation, he goes of f to Kyoto to escape force for a month but he finds out that maybe vacations aren't so bad when he meets a beautiful red headed photographer. SxS

Author's Note: This was inspired by the book "Invisible Man" by Ralph Ellison and the song "Everyone's Gotta Learn Sometimes" by Beck. Besides the ending, this will be the only chapter in Kaiba's POV.

Warnings: language, mild ooc-ness, possible lemon or lime so rating may go up

Disclaimer: I don't own YuGiOh or any of the quotes used throughout the story

Chapter 1: A City of Lost Dreams

I don't have a dream? How can I say that? I myself am a dream – Ayumi Hamasaki, singer

April 1st

I never thought a man like me could be broken. I never thought that I, Seto Kaiba, could be broken into the little pieces of a fragile troublesome child. I never thought I was invisible. I was invisible to the world in which I grew to despise. A world where my little brother, Mokuba was my only true meaning. Where I buried myself, my thoughts, my hopes, and my dreams into the endless piles of work, driven by the company I fought for. Sometimes I wonder was it worth it? Was it worth giving up my sanity? Was it worth giving up my humanity? Was it worth giving up my heart? Was it worth giving up a heart I promised to my little brother? To think this was all discovered by a simple doctor's visit is startling. I only went because my board of directors, being I was so young, I was required me to keep up with my health. I usually never listened but I reluctantly agreed since I was already suffering internally by mind blowing headaches and gruesome pains in my chest almost as if it was coming from my heart itself. I went to the doctor about a week from today. I can remember that day very well.

I entered the office with my usual arrogance (it's something I admit openly) and greeted him with a firm hand shake. He did his routine check-up, looking at the usual spots for damage. It wasn't until he looked at my face did I see amazement and a deep curiosity. He looked into my eyes as if he was looking for something, perhaps a forgotten emotion I had hid somewhere. He abruptly stopped and stood tall once again. His glasses reflected the bright sun.

"Mr. Kaiba, are you experimenting any…problems of any sorts" he asked.

"Yes actually" I answered. "I've been suffering from migraines, I've had trouble sleeping, and I always feel some sort of pain in my heart, just the usual stuff" I didn't tell him I was also troubled by a lingering sadness. I had been suffering from it for years and until this day I don't know why but I refuse tell him. I didn't like that fact that people wish to search me like some book waiting to be read. There were some secrets I wished to keep for myself.

"Mr. Kaiba, I understand being in your position in very demanding however these symptoms are stress-related"

"And what are you trying to say?" I said slightly irritated.

"I'm saying you don't have to die to reach the top"

"I had no intentions on dying,"

"But that's where you'll end up, Mr. Kaiba, tell me, what do you care for in this world?" he asked. I was taken back by his question.

"I care for my little brother, what did this have to do with a physical examination" I said angrily.

"Because mentally you aren't the man you claim to be"

"Excuse me"

Who does this man think he is?

"The pains you feel are connected to your mental state, I sense that secretly you're unhappy, in the words of Mr. Ellison, "You are indeed an invisible man"; No one but you're younger brother has probably seen your true piece of you and even so you hide from him, don't you? Yes, you sir, are invisible"

It was then I started to shake in deep anger, rage, and…fear. How could this man make such an observation? He was a brilliant man no doubt about that but it still disturbed me how he was able to analyze me in such a manner. For the first time in years, I was scared.

"Who are you to think you are? I don't have to take this, I'm leaving" I began to gather my things and adjust my clothing. The doctor continued to look down on me with unmoving eyes.

"Fine then don't leave without your required treatment" he said. I stopped abruptly. Required treatment?

"I giving a required one month rest from your work, you are only allowed to do three hours a day to work at home if you want or in another disclosed location" said the doctor as wrote something down on a pad. I was in shock at what he had just said. Who does he think he is? I don't have time for a vacation!

"And what makes you think I would follow that treatment?" I said with sarcasm.

"Because I already have seen this problem before from you, your colleagues are worried about Mr. Kaiba, your brother is worried"

"My brother?"

"Yes, Mokuba, I've spoken with him about this too since he was the first to acknowledged this problem and then we took action" he stated.

"This is ridiculous-"

"Mokuba called me before you got here, he asked me to tell you to call him when I told you, Mr. Kaiba, at least let him be apart of your decision"

I looked with unweaving eyes. I felt my anger rise but suppressed it with an emotionless gaze. I calmly got up, took my trench and walked out the door trying to process the words that had just been said. I felt the eyes of the doctor still looking at me but I simply ignored him. I paced down the white hallway of the doctor's office until I reached the front door leading to the outside. It was raining lightly but I chose not to care. I felt somewhat relieved by the cool breezy winds of the April showers touching my skin.

I pulled out my cell phone and called Mokuba. I needed to know why he went against me like this. I needed some kind of sanity.

"Hello?"

"Hey kid, it's me"

"Oh Seto, how did the appointment go?" asked Mokuba innocently. I sensed a slight feeling of tension in his voice.

"…I'm forced to go on rest for a month…do you know anything about this?" I whispered.

"What?"

"Did you know about the treatment?" I said a bit louder. I felt the aggression and frustration rise in me but I didn't want to take out my anger on him, the one person I care for.

"Seto, I…you need help Seto, you have been looking and feeling very sick for quite some time now, I just wanted to help you big brother" he said softly.

"Then why didn't you talk to me first?!" I exclaimed and this time my anger was clear.

"Because I don't know you anymore" he said. I could hear his innocent tears fall from his eyes. The words repeated in my mind.

Because I don't know you anymore…

"You're…never really there, Seto; you could be sitting right next to me and I could still feel so alone, it's almost like you make yourself invisible"

I didn't know what to say. I heard that word, "invisible" and I cringed inside. To my own brother, I was among the air I breathe. I was among the living dead. I was an invisible man in his eyes.

"I'll be home in a few" was all I could say.

"I love you big brother" he said to me.

I simply held the phone to my ear.

"You too" I muttered and hung up.

I couldn't bring myself to say those words. I was never good with the concept of love. He knew I loved him but I could never bring myself to say it. I couldn't bring myself to say it to anyone. I know I hurt him so deeply but what could I do? How can you fix what's broken if you're the one that needs to be fixed?

That's why I am now driving on the roads of the old city, the city of Kyoto. A city where so much was lost and little was gained. I'm driving because I couldn't face my little brother. I never said goodbye to him that night. I left the mansion without anyone knowing, I couldn't my own fears so I left to begin this so called rest. If I did truly need some rest then it was best to be away from everything that caused me pain. I don't know if this treatment was a curse to break me or a blessing to cure. I simply don't know anymore

Through questioning and wondering, I felt that same pain in my chest again as if someone was tugging my heart; I was so tired of this pain. Maybe a broken city could help fix a broken man.

Hey, everyone I'm back. No, I haven't forgotten about you. I just needed a little break from writing to concrete on some personal. I am still working on my other story "Winner" so don't worry. I hope you guys like this story, I kind of toyed with Kaiba's characterization just to experiment but you'll probably see it later.

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