I wrote this story to get certain thoughts out of my head. I'm not a professional writer, but I found this quite liberating. Sometimes it's not an option to keep things to yourself.

One more day of school – one more day, one more exam and I would be completely free, at least of homework, teenagehood and Mystic Falls. Turning 18 didn't exactly help matters. Being in High School always had the connotation of being too young for everything. After next week's graduation ceremony I would finally be the master of my own fate, at least when it came to college or a job. There was only one bigger problem: Damon. And another even bigger problem: Stefan. I had no idea how to break the news to them that I was leaving Mystic Falls for good. What would hurt them even more is that I couldn't see them or my life with them fit into my future.

Stefan sat in the old armchair to my right. He was fondling the button on his jacket. After pacing around for a while Damon sat down on the sofa next to me. He looked me directly in the eyes and said with the most sincerety: "I only ever wanted your happiness. I'm sorry if that wasn't always clear." "I know", I said looking down, trying not to see the tear forming in his eye. For a moment we were all silent. Then Stefan cleared his throat and said: "If it's what it takes for you to be happy, if that means leaving Mystic Falls and us behind, that is what you should do." My heart jumped. This is what made the coice so impossible for me! Damon loved me so much that he could never let me go. Stefan on the other hand loved me just as much, I was sure of it, and he was stronger. He could let me go for my own sake. It was simply imposible for me to choose. Getting away might be just what I needed. We sat in silence for what seemed a really long time. I could hear the old grandfather clock chiming away multiple times. As I looked over to Stefan I saw that he covered his face with his hands. Damon was still sitting next to me staring at the carpet in front of him. Finally Stefan broke the silence. "I know what I said before, but I can't let you go, Elena!" He got up and sat down to my right looking me right in the eye. He took my hand in his own and started stroking it gently. I felt Damon reaching for my left hand and holding it. I looked over to him. He had a forced smile on his face. What happened now was something I'd feared would come: I started to cry. Within the tears I tried to get words out. "It hasn't –" I gasped for air, "It hasn't exactly been easy. You both haven't made it easy." I pulled my hands out from under theirs. "Both of you – you've turned my head so far that I can't think anymore! You both made it very clear that you wanted me for yourselves and I should leave the other behind! How could I? How in the world could I choose one of you and lose the other? I can't!" It was now or never to reveal the truth. "I love you both. I love you both equally – if for different reasons – but I love you. Damon" I turned to him, "I love you. I love you so much my heart hurts! And Stefan" I turned my head to the other side and looked at him "I love you in ways you can't even imagine. But this is an impossible situation! I can't love you both equally and just be around you. No, I can't! And don't make me do it. Don't make me choose! I think leaving you both behind is the only way!" I now started sobbing loudly. I felt both of them put their hands on my back, trying to console me. For a while no one said anything. Finally Stefan spoke. "I think I understand now. I never knew you felt that way! This must have been torture for you." Damon let out a sigh. "We've been unfair to you. We could have just asked you how you were feeling, why you were acting the way you did. We should simply have talked." He lifted his head, looked me right in the eye and said: "I will let you go. Stefan was already there, he already figured out how to do it. Maybe I can do it, too. But let me say and I hope Stefan is with me on this, let us do something for you. Anything you want!" Stefan nodded. "I agree, brother. Let us do something for you to make good on how we've treated you." He handed me a handkerchief. I dried my eyes and said: "That's a good start." We all laughed. I had no idea what I wanted from them. They wanted to give me something or do something for me, but I didn't even think it was necessary. Yet in the back of my head I realized that this was the only chance to fulfill a phantasy of mine that otherwise would never have happened. I just had no idea how to say it. I waited for a minute, but there was no other way except for simply saying it. I looked down and with all the courage I had said: "Make love to me." I heard nothing for some time. Then Stefan said: "Who?" I cleard my throat and answered: "Both of you." Finally I looked up and saw both of their faces in complete shock. "You said you'd grant me a wish. You said 'anything'." I looked from Damon to Stefan. "No!" Stefan said. "Absolutely not! What would this do for you?" I had to smile. "What this would do for me? I think it would – It would fulfill something. I know this is a bit – extreme to say the least, but maybe this is what we all need. Some kind of last hurrah." I had to laugh at my own words. It all sounded so silly, yet I really wanted to do this. I heard Stefan sigh deeply. I looked over to Damon who had a softened expression. "Damon, what do you say?" He looked at me and said: "Fine. I'll do it." Stefan rolled his eyes. "No, no! I will not see my brother naked! No way!" Damon laughed out loud. "You don't have to look at me. I won't look at you." "So, you're totally alright with this, Damon?" Stefan asked in disbelief. "I don't have a problem with it", Damon answered. "Are you afraid I will judge you or something, brother?" Stefan shifted uncomfortably. "No, that's not it, Damon! I just don't think this is a good idea." "Oh brother, lighten up! You haven't had fun in 50 years. It's time to change that. Just go with it." Stefan gave a deep sigh and turned his head to me. "Fine then." My heart jumped. Now it was up to me to really make it happen or endure the silence and awkwardness, which would eventually result in me leaving, and leaving things unresolved. So I had to do something. I turned over to Damon, pulled his head towards me and kissed him. He kissed me back, moving his lips gently. I let go of him and turned to Stefan. He had a look of doubt on his face, but it his expression was soft and gentle now. I moved my head towards his and so did he. As we kissed Damon put one hand on my hip. I let go of Stefan and turned back to his brother. It was an odd feeling yet strangely liberating. As I moved in to kiss Damon again, I touched his lips and got up. First I took his hand and lifted him up from the sofa. Then I did the same with Stefan. Damon moved in, lifted me up by the leg and shoulders and carried me up the stairs behind the sofa. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Stefan taking a deep breath and slowly following. It took no time at all before I felt myself gently be put onto the bedsheets. At first I wasn't sure which room I was in, but then I recognized it as the guest room I had only once been in before long ago when I'd first started going out with Stefan. What a different world that was! I had hated Damon and never dreamed of doing anything like that. As Damon let go of me for a second I sat up quickly and removed my sweater. Then I grabbed hold of my bra and tore it off. Damon gently pressed me down to the cushions and kissed me passionately. I heard the door close and footsteps coming closer. Stefan lay down next to me and started stroking my upper body. Damon let go of me for a second and began opening my blouse. Stefan led his hand gently slide down my legs and up to my pants. He opened the button whilst Damon removed his shirt. Stefan gently put his hand down my pants and let his fingers slowly massage my clit. I moaned out in pleasure. It was the most erotic feeling, being caressed by two guys I loved at the same time. Stefan slowly pulled down my pants and Damon removed his pants. His upper body was very muscular and as he he moved closer to me I put my hands on him. He felt slightly cold yet solid. Stefan was now removing my underpants and moved in speading my legs. I put his finger into me moving gently. Damon leaned over me and kissed me full on. Stefan increased the speed of his fingers inside of me. I got a hold of Damon's pants and opened them. Pulling them down I noticed he wasn't wearing underwear. In the meantime Stefan let go of me and lay down beside me. Damon moved in, now naked and slowly and gently slid inside. There was no feeling that could compare to that sensation. He immediately started moving faster and faster while Stefan leaned in to caress my breasts. The pleasure intensified and could hear Damon moan loudly. As I looked up I saw he had his eyes on me. Stefan now moved upwards and started kissing me drowning out my moans. He moved his hand from my breasts down to my clit and was rubbing it while Damon was still inside me moving faster and faster. As Stefan stopped kissing me, he suddenly said: "Are you ok?" I didn't know why he asked that since I hadn't been exactly quiet since the first second we started, but he was only trying to make me feel as comfortable as possible. In that moment, though, all I could let out was a loud "Yes!" Damon was going harder now. I saw sweat dripping off his forehead. He looked like he was about to come. I was not exactly ready yet, but I was right. Shortly after Damon let down a load "Ooh!" and moved a couple of more times. Then he lay down on top of me kissing me gently. After taking a few breaths he asked: "Were you there yet?" I shook my head. "Right, brother, it's all on you then." Stefan looked away apparently ashamed. He was still fully clothed. He moved into above me and took his shirt off. His muscles were almost shiny. I unbuckled his belt and opened his pants. Damon lay down beside us and kissed me all the way down from my mouth to my breasts. Stefan pulled down his pants and slid them off the bed. He caressed my hips and slowly moved in. He looked me in the eyes and kissed me. I felt him slipping inside me. It was again the most amazing feeling. He first moved very slowly, slipping in and out. Meanwhile Damon leaned in to massage my clit. Stefan moved faster as I started to feel intense pleasure. Damon was still massaging me. I wasn't prepared for this but suddenly he spoke.

"Are you enjoying yourself?"

"Oh yes", I moaned.

"Should I move faster?"

"Hmm, yes."

He took both of my hands and pressed them down next to my head.

"Tell me how much you like it!"

"I – I .. aaah …. I love it! Oh yes!"

"Have your dreams been fulfilled now?"

"Oh yes. They .aaaaaah …. have! Yes!"

"Are you close?

"YES!"

"Closer now?"

"Yes! Yes!"

"Coming?"

"Oh yes, yes, yeeeeeees!"

My toes curled up and let out a scream. I couldn't tell if Stefan came as well and I was too preoccupied to notice. Damon let go of me, gave me a kiss and sat down on the edge of the bed. Stefan slid out of me and lay down beside me.

I still didn't know which one I loved more or if I should actually leave, but at least that phantasy was fulfilled.