This is my first fic on here, and my first HP fic. Comments always appreciated. Thanks.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, settings or anything really. They all belong to J.K Rowling.
It was her smile. It seemed to radiate warmth and happiness around the whole room. It glowed, she as a person glowed. Her smile was a weak point for him. It would make his mouth go dry and he would stumble and stutter. Whenever he stumbled or stuttered she would just smile or giggle, making it even worse. He thought she must hate conversations with him, they went nowhere fast because she smiled so damn much! She was one of those people who was always positive, every cloud had a silver lining, there was a light at the end of every tunnel. He had learnt to associate a light at the end of the tunnel as another train coming. Maybe that's why he liked her so much, she was so different from himself...
The kitchen door opened and someone stepped in. Lupin didn't look up from the copy of The Daily Prophet he was reading intently. Apparently there had been two more injuries by death-eaters, both victims were in a serious condition at St. Mungos. Only when he hear the sound of a chair falling, a noise he had started associating with a certain person, did he look up, to be greeted by a smiling Tonks
"Wotcher Remus"
"Tonks, I didn't know you were dropping by today, I thought you were working" Lupin said calmly, trying to hide his pleasure that she had dropped by.
"Yeah, I am, it's paperwork though, piles of the stuff, so I decided a visit here would do just the trick to cheer me up" Tonks said happily, seating herself on the chair opposite Lupin
"I thought they had you positioned at Hogwarts?" Lupin questioned
"There's nobody at Hogwarts, Remus, the summer holidays started 3 weeks ago..." She trailed off lamely, looking at him with some concern
Lupin looked flustered "O-of course, just got back from my last transfiguration you see, not quite with it yet" He said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.
Tonks smiled back, in a way Lupin knew she didn't believe him
"Y-you know, you can talk to me, about anything, the lycanthropy, Harry, Dumbledore, Sirius.." She once again trailed off, trying to read his expression. His face looked stony.
She reached across to his hand which was resting on the table top, and took it in her own, her thumb drawing patterns on his palm. He gazed at their entwined hands with an uncomfortable look on his face, though he didn't pull away.
"I'm always there for you Remus, just an owl away"
This reminded him of a conversation he had had with her a few weeks previously in Hogwarts hospital wing, in front of everyone she had as much as declared her love for him. He too wished they could be together, but he knew it could never happen.
"Tonks.. Please don't"
"Don't what?" Tonks asked, preparing herself for another battle
"I've already explained, it would be inappropriate to have anything more than friendship"
"I never said anything about us getting together, did I?" Tonks said accusingly
"It's what you were thinking" Lupin replied in what he hoped to be a calm voice
"Oh, you can read my thoughts can you? Well good. Then you'll know how much it's tearing me apart to see you like this, like you've given up on life, living like a hermit, when I think, I know I could help you, but you won't let me in" Tonks exploded, her hair turning a violent shade of red to match her face.
"In case you haven't noticed, it is rather hard for me too at the moment, or maybe you've forgotten, my last remaining friend has just died, I'm completely shunned by society for being a filthy, murderous, werewolf, but in the end, who can blame them? So right now I could do without your childish attempts to make it seem like it is all my fault" Lupin replied, taking all the hurt he had been feeling out on Tonks, who shied away from him, obviously not expecting such an outburst. Lupin expected her to jump in with some witty comebacks, but she didn't, she turned away from him and walked silently out of the door, closing it quietly behind her, for once not knocking over the hat stand on her way out.
Lupin felt suddenly alone and wanting company after weeks of detesting the very thought. He felt terrible for taking it out on Tonks, he kept remembering her face as she had left, she looked so hurt, and something he had never seen in her before, vunerable. He wanted to hug her, tell her everything was now going to be ok, kiss away her tears. He wanted to love her.
He opened the door to Number 12 Grimmauld Place and stepped into the tangy August air. He walked down the muggle inhabited road until he reached the point that the Order had been using for Apparation. He focused his mind clearly on Tonk's house, which was difficult with so many emotions swirling inside him. He felt the familiar compressed feeling which came with apparation, a feeling his heart was all too used to, and he was finally going to set it free. He found himself on the doorstep of Tonk's small house. He knocked cautiously on the door. He was suprised when it was almost immediately opened. A bedraggled looking Tonks stood on the other side, brown hair falling over her obviously tear-stained face, he assumed it must be her natural colour. She indicated for him to come in, and closed the door behind him.
"I'm so sorry Tonks, I never should have taken it out on you, I was hurting, about Dumbledore, Sirius, you"
"Me?" She parroted
"Yes, you" Lupin repeated
"Well, I'm sorry too, I was being petty, if you don't want to be more than friends, fine, I can learn to accept that" Tonks said, through a watery smile
"But I don't want to just be friends, I really like you Tonks, no, not like, love" Lupin took a step towards her
Tonks beamed at him, he had never seen her happier than at that moment. Something caught his eye suddenly and he turned to find himself looking at a Patronus. It had four legs. A dog. No, too big to be a dog. A wolf...
"Is that yours?" Lupin asked
"Well, yeah" Tonks replied sheepishly, looking down at her feet
"I thought I heard Severus say once that your Patronus took the form of a leopard..." Lupin said, bemused
"Well, it did, until recently anyway, well, until I met you" Tonks muttered, still looking at her feet
"Me?" It was Lupin's turn to parrot now "But, why have you conjured it? Surely there weren't dementors here?" Lupin said, looking around as if expecting a dozen dementors to suddenly appear.
"No, i-it's just, well, it kinda reminds me of you, and I wanted you, but I couldn't have you, so I thought it might help. It didn't" Tonk's cheeks had turned a bright red
Lupin flicked his wand at the wolf and it instantly disappeared. Lupin once again turned to face her.
"You won't need him any more. You have me. I won't leave you again. I promise" Lupin tilted her head up to face him. He bent down until their lips made contact. A warmth spread between them. Their embrace seemed to last an eternity. Eventually they pulled away. Lupin smiled at her and she smiled back. Her smile.
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