A/N: Today's scenario: Dylas, Doug, and Leon are drinking. Frey is sleeping around with all the bachelors. And DougxDylas is Leon's OTP.
The three were sitting together at a table at Porcoline's Kitchen. It was barely past sun set but the bottles on their table were already piling high. Earlier that day was the Turnip Festival so no one was interested in being in there except the three.
Dylas had his head down on the table, face completely flushed after five whole bottles of wine to himself. He felt sleepy but had no intention of letting the alcohol win. Doug slapped him unnecessarily hard on the back. "C'mon gelding, you a wimp?" His words had a bit of a slur and his face was just as flushed but he was grinning.
"Ah, yeah. You're one to talk. You've been sipping that one bottle this entire time, damn midget." Dylas huffed and sat back up. Though he wouldn't admit it, he did feel like a wimp. But anyone would if they were sitting next to Leon. Leon had drank the most, one bottle after the other, and didn't look slightly bothered.
"I ain't a midget, you're just a stupid tall horse." Doug giggled at his own joke as he spun around in his seat.
Dylas gritted his teeth. "I ain't a horse, shorty." He gave Doug a deadly glare that would be enough to make anyone scared, if they weren't Doug.
Doug faced Dylas in his seat. He looked ready to protest against the short comment but he was startled by a light tap of a bottle against his head. "Can you two please stop having your martial issues right now?" Leon smiled at the displeased look on both of their faces. "And go grab me another bottle or two."
Doug angrily snatched the bottle from Leon's hand. "Fine. Fine." He got up and walked to the kitchen and came back with as many bottles as his arms could carry, nine.
Leon gladly took a bottle. "What? Are you trying to give me alcohol poisoning? You bring so many back each time."
Dylas grabbed a bottle too. "Well last round you drank all nine before I could even let Doug out of a headlock and grab one." He popped it open and began to drink it.
"Well you should've been focused on getting your drink instead of killing me." Doug tried to get more out of the bottle he had been drinking before but it was empty. He proudly grabbed another bottle and opened it.
"If I wanted to kill you..." A smug smile creeped across Dylas' face. "You'd be dead." The two engaged in a death glare competition, not an ounce of intimidation between either of them.
Leon sighed. "You two are immature. Let's play a game to entertain your childish minds." He picked up an empty bottle and placed it between the three of them. "Truth or dare, spin the bottle edition."
Dylas looked at him, not a bit amused. "Maybe you really are drunk. You're starting to sound pretty stupid."
"C'mon let's humor him, you stupid gelding." Doug grinned stupidly. "You start, Leon."
Dylas seemed ready to beat the rice out of Doug but Leon didn't seem to care. "Alright then. No chickening out. Nothing is off-limits." He spun the bottle gently and it landed on Doug. "Truth or dare?"
"Dare!" Doug didn't for a moment consider what he just got himself into. "I'm so badass, I can do anything."
Leon seemed to smirk more when he said that. "Kiss Dylas."
With the two words all the color drained from Dylas' face. "W-What? That's not funny, dude..."
"I made the rules clear. No chickening out, nothing off-limits." Leon let a small, smug smile sit on his face while Dylas and Doug both considered the situation.
"What the hell? Are we little kids or something?" Dylas said with a scowl.
"I'm no chicken!" Doug proclaimed at the same time. He jumped onto Dylas, who fell out of his seat backwards, kicking and screaming unrepeatable words at Doug.
"Agh! What the hell midget!? Get offa...!" Doug managed to get his lips to Dylas' and forced a kiss onto him. "Get off of me dammit!" Dylas shoved his knuckles into the dwarf's head and pushed him away.
Leon laughed slightly. "Ah... what total imbeciles. I didn't say on the lips." He picked up his bottle and took a sip.
Doug rubbed his head and looked angrily at Leon. "You dared me to! You can't call me stupid for it!"
"I'm drinking until I forget this night..." Dylas picked his chair back up and resumed drinking.
"Well, it's my turn anyway." Doug stood up and grabbed the bottle. He thought very carefully about what he was doing. He spun the bottle and it landed on Leon. "Truth or dare?"
"Truth. I'd rather not have revenge taken on me right off the bat." Leon put down his bottle and turned towards Doug. "I'm ready for anything you got."
"Oh. Um.. I wasn't ready for you to say truth..." He sat down in his seat and thought a moment. "Hmm... Which girl is your type?"
Leon frowned. "I'm disappointed with your question. Any girl besides Xiao Pai or Amber. Nothing against their personalities but they are a bit... underdeveloped. They are missing something every woman needs, a beautiful figure. But I am worried Forte may want to slice me up. And Margaret is a bit too bossy for my taste. If I had to pick a top three it'd be Dolce, Clorica, and Frey."
Dylas looked at Leon for a moment. "You put a lot of consideration into that answer. But hands off Frey, she's totally mine." Dylas grinned. "I already know just how I'm gonna make her engagement ring."
"W-Whoa!" Doug looked shocked. "You two are already that serious!? You're thinking about getting married you stupid gelding!?"
Leon smirked. "Don't be so jealous of Frey, Doug. Besides, the two have been dating for a while. And I was rescued over three years ago. I'm surprised it took so long, considering I know Dylas is no gelding. Or maybe they've just been fooling around without being married."
"What!?" Doug slammed his hands down on the table and stood up. "One, I'm not jealous of Frey! Two, you've two been getting down to business without telling me!?"
Leon started laughing uncontrollably and Dylas was slowly get irritated. "Doug, you ask that like you own Dylas... Or maybe this time you care because the girl is two timing the fool, and you actually care about him."
Dylas stood up, nearly losing his balance from all the alcohol. "What!? How could you even say something like that?"
Doug was looking down and deathly silent. He wouldn't look up and cast his gaze up at his friend. Even though they fought a lot, he never considered hurting him like that.
"D-Doug... That isn't true right?" He was letting the desperate in his voice show. Dylas was in no way attempting to hide the way he felt, an effect of the alcohol and his feelings for Frey.
"Of course it is." Leon sighed and rested his head on his hand. "I'm not one to lie so now that I accidentally let that slip I'll tell the truth. I smelled both of you on her every time we went on a date. And Arthur, Vishnal, and even Kiel. And their scent wasn't like they were just around each other, more like they were very up close and personal."
"I'm sorry, man. I didn't know you were serious about her. I really didn't. I hurt when I first realized I wasn't her one and only. I kinda just kept her around for a backup plan. I knew she was with Leon and Vishnal..." Doug had suddenly picked up drinking speed, now on his fifth bottle.
Dylas shrugged. "It's fine. She's just not as good as news as I thought, I guess. But if anyone could to relate to what I'm about to say it would be you two." He took a big gulp from his bottle and sat back in his chair. "It's hard to not have a family, no one to love. Then have someone walk into your life, act sweeter than honey. Tell you they love you. Then have it ripped from underneath you. Like a slap of reality, telling you 'You're alone and always will be.' Life is harsh, life is lonely."
"Gelding... that is the least stupid thing you've ever said. But you do have us. Right Leon?" Doug grinned and gave Dylas a thumbs up.
"Right." Leon nodded his head a few times for extra confirmation.
Dylas smiled. "Alright, which of you wants to have my children?" He started laughing.
Doug sighed. "Neither of us. You can't even have kids, you're a gelding." Doug started laughing too.
"Well, I'm sure Dylas is actually completely functional. I'm sure he'd be willing to prove it to you once you two get married." Leon chuckled and the other two stopped.
"We don't like each other like that." Dylas glared at Leon.
"We barely like each other at all." Doug glared just as hard.
Leon smiled. "Ah sure. Let's go with that story." He stood up and stretched. "I think it's about time we head home. Well that's not very far for both of you, considering you probably both spend your nights together in Dylas' room. Try not do disturb Porcoline, the walls here mush be thin." He walked out, trying hard not to loose his balance and leaving the other two, scowling but enjoying his joke.
"He's probably right. Blossom is probably worrying." He stood up and yawned. "Man, I'm tired too. Goodnight, gelding." He stumbled outside, obviously drunk.
"And I'm left alone... in not a bad way." He stood up and stumbled over nothing. "I'm drunk... I can't possibly clean this up..." He grabbed a piece of paper and wrote a note. "Margaret is gonna yell at me over this for hours... but I'm gonna listen to her. Then tell her how beautiful her voice is. And move on from Frey, get a relationship with a girl who is amazing..." He pulled out his sack of gold. "About one hundred thousand should cover the drinks and clean up." He dumped the contents of the sack on the table and went up to his room, careful to not to trip over the stairs.
A while later Margaret came to the restaurant. She saw the pile of bottles and freaked out. "Who would leave such a mess!? This is out...rage...ous?" She picked up the large pile of money and the note. "Hmm... Dear Margaret, I'm sure you're the one who will find this mess. I'm really sorry but I was too drunk to clean it up myself. Part of the money is for the wine and the rest is for you cleaning this up. Feel free to lecture me tomorrow. From, Dylas... P.S. Maybe we could hang out after the lecture. If you'd like." Her face lit up red. "Did Dylas just leave me a mess and ask me on a date at the same time...? Maybe I should lecture him... and take him up on that offer." She put the note in her pocket.