She's been gone for three days, which is about how long he's been drunk. He keeps replaying that moment over and over - his hand over her heart. His eyes pooling with love and sorrow as she slips away.
The harsh clang of the metal hitting the asphalt as if striking him where his broken heart hangs heavily. He's clutching the dagger to his chest so tightly that his knuckles become the color of his pallid face - he can't hear David and Mary Margaret's words of reassurance and consolation over the buzzing in his brain.
Today he decides it is time to put together a plan. It seems impossible to continue living, knowing that she's gone, but he needs to do something. He needs to have hope that she can be saved. He needs to find her - even if he can't save her. He just has to be with her one more time, even if she kills him on sight - the overwhelming darkness making her blind to his place and importance in her life.
Yes, he'd spent a good deal of his 300-some-odd years working to find a way to defeat the dark one - but back then he didn't care if it meant their total destruction. In the many lifetimes of research he'd done on the subject, he'd never run across a solution that left the person alive while banishing only the darkness.
This is what led to the several days of heavy drinking - the fact that he was the most knowledgeable person on the matter, and he knows for a fact the only thing they can do to end the darkness will end the woman he loves.
But somewhere in the depths of his despair, he could hear Emma's voice - small at first, but growing in tenacity.
"Killian, Come back to me."
And that's when the tiniest glimmer of hope found it's way into his aching heart.
He'd finally agreed to meet David at the library for some research, and as he shrugged into his leather jacket he closed his eyes and took a deep breath - steeling himself for the flood of optimism he's sure to get from the almost sickeningly-idealistic prince.
With his eyes still screwed shut, a thunderous crack shakes him violently from the calm moment. He runs to the window, wild eyes searching for the source of the noise.
Out in the distance, far into the woods, there's a column of fire swirling madly and reaching high into the stormy sky. His brows are furrowed in deep concentration as he takes in the sight. It looks oddly similar to the time portal he chased Emma into what feels like an eternity ago.
He can't help the way his heart falls at the thought of her, and then suddenly leaps - daring to think that maybe, just maybe his Swan [darkness and all] has found her way back to him, if only to wreak havoc and destruction on the town.
He's bolting out the door, running faster than he ever has in his considerably long life, when the column dissipates. He's grateful he got a pretty good look at it's general location, and for the first time in a few days, he's feeling almost hopeful.
For some time he's just running. His lithe body, which had been crippled with grief the past few days, was grateful to be stretched and pushed while his mind is abuzz with possibilities.
He's lost in thought, playing out all of the scenarios he may encounter when he crashes directly into someone - sending them both flying in a snarled mess of limbs and curse words.
From the flat of his back he moves swiftly to regain his composure and draws the blade from his boot to defend himself, if necessary. But when he looks up to face the stranger, he's sure he's dreaming - or he hit his head a lot harder than he thought.
On the forest floor is a lanky man, maybe in his mid twenties, with emerald eyes that look just like… and a mop of dark hair that looks just like… and then he breaks into a genuine (if slightly mischievous) smile that looks exactly like…
"Liam" he interrupts. "You don't know me, but I'm… I'm Liam," he juts his hand out awkwardly to offer a handshake, but when Killian refuses to drop the blade, Liam just raises his hand and flicks his wrist in a blundering half-wave half-salute.
Killian can't seem to breathe - he couldn't have heard that right. He clears his throat and manages to choke out "right. Uh. What are you doing out here?"
He keeps the blade pointed at the stranger (hoping Liam doesn't notice how it's shaking a bit), though he suddenly gets the feeling he's not going to need to use it .
"Oh my god, there you are! I told you I couldn't keep -" a beautiful girl with long flowing blond hair comes flying between them, going directly to the man - but upon seeing the look on his face she turns to Killian.
He doesn't understand why, but as her eyes search his she breaks into a smile, just like Liam did moments ago.
Killian almost hits the forest floor for a second time when her eyes lock with his. They're the same gray blue he's seen in the mirror every day of his life but they're set in the most amazing and delicate porcelain skin.
He tries to shake the odd encounter and channel his commanding Captain Hook persona by adopting a more aggressive and threatening tone.
"You haven't answered my question" he's practically yelling at them now, his rigid stance and feral eyes giving away his intense unrest that has settled low in his stomach.
"What are you doing out here? Did you see that portal? Have you seen a blonde woman?" He's spitting out questions rapid-fire, not even giving them time to respond.
Liam has stepped in front of the girl, his arm outstretched protectively in front of her.
"We're here for you." Liam says plainly. "I know this is going to be… difficult, but we're not from around here. You've traveled in one of those portals before, you remember what they do?"
"Aye. I've been through a portal like that before." His mind flashes with memories of the adventure with his Swan, watching her parents fall in love - himself falling even deeper in love with her along the way. "It was a time portal. If yours was the same, I gather you're either from the past, or the future."
"Future," the girl chimes in - head peeking out from beside the man's arm. "We're from the future. And I would rather you stop pointing that at us if it's all the same to you." Her eyes flicker to the blade he's still clutching.
"Didn't catch your name, lass." He says challengingly. Hand still raised with the blade, but swaying more than he'd like.
"Eva. Eva Jones. Now will you put that thing away?"
His heart freezes in his chest. She's from the future. Her name is Jones. Her hair and courage is Emma's. Her eyes are his.
"I'm your daughter," she blurts out unceremoniously at the long and awkward silence. If she is his daughter, she clearly got her mother's tact.
The blade drops from his hand, his brain too clouded by her words to notice he was still holding it at all.
He's believed more outlandish stories. Hell, when they were trapped in that alternate reality where he was the coward and the bloody crocodile was the knight, he took little prompting to believe Henry's version of events.
If he's being honest with himself, it's not difficult to believe he has a daughter [he had always wanted a family], but when he realized he was in love with Emma, he thought deeply about the fact that it might never happen.
She already had Henry, she still had her parents - maybe she didn't want to become a mother again. He'd forced himself to face the possibility that if he was lucky enough to have true love with such an incredible woman, he may have to give up having children of his own flesh and blood.
"My...my what?" Killian sputters out, suddenly unsteady on his feet.
"You're daughter, and he's your son" she says, more confidently. Pushing past her brother and walking straight up to Killian - staring him down in a surprisingly confrontational manner that is yet again reminiscent of his Swan.
Liam is quick to chase his sister, grabbing her arm to pull her back a little with a dramatic eye roll that shows all the annoyance of an older brother who is quite used to trying to protect a free-spirited sister. Killian is glad of it, though, as he gets a little bit of much needed breathing room.
His head spins while he processes the news. He's both terrified and overwhelmingly happy at the prospect. He wonders what kind of father he is, what kind of mother she is, what kind of people they are [clearly they're courageous to say the least], what their life looks like.
That's when it hits him - their mother. He'd just assumed it was Emma. I mean, she looked just like her, it had to be...
"She needs you. Mom needs you to find her, and we're here to help make sure that happens," Liam added. "You of all people should know how dangerous it is when true love gets interrupted."
"I'm sorry, I'm just - so, you're saying Emma and I …" His mind was awhirl with the implications. Even though she said that she loved him just before the darkness overtook her, his darker side allowed him to think that she only said it because she knew they'd likely be separated forever.
"Oh, right - You don't even know who 'mom' is" Eva says. "But yes, 'mom' is Emma. Where we're from you've been married for 24 years."
He can't believe it, the skittish woman he'd come to love would not only truely love him back, but love him so dearly that they'd get married and start a family of their own. It's not that he didn't long for it, he just never imagined it possible.
Even when he met her, and he finally began to crawl out from the darkness that had surrounded his life for so long - at most he fantasized that she would chose to be with him, and they'd live out their days together. They'd never been terribly traditional, so he wasn't even sure they'd get married let alone have children of their own together.
"How ya doin in there, dad?" Sometime when he was lost in thought, Eva must've closed the distance between them, her sudden closeness and the familial term overwhelming him.
He'd never thought that the first time he heard someone call him "dad" it would be like this - the word shot directly to his heart, causing this amazing fullness expanding within his chest, making him feel both proud and wondrously happy - if a little dazed.
"Wha - oh, sorry. I'm, uh, I'm good. A little surprised is all. It's a lot to take in, you know" he scratches nervously behind his ear while he contemplates the idea that the two beautiful people in front of him are actually his children.
Finally, he feels like he's able to find his words.
"I would say that I can't believe you're my daughter, but it's not entirely true. I mean, you look -" he reaches down to cup her face tenderly, lost in her fierce beauty. "You look so much like her."
She is everything he would want his daughter to be. She practically glows with youthful vibrance, her eyes alight with tenacity and wit.
He looks to Liam, arms crossed and his weight on his back leg, a constant eye on the sister he clearly cares so deeply for.
"Though you never knew him, you remind me so much of your Uncle," Killian addresses his son. "He always looked out for me, just as you clearly look out for her," Killian nods back to Eva.
As he motions to his daughter, her face splits into a wide grin. With that, his final lingering doubt falls away. He believes them wholeheartedly, and he could not be more excited to get to know them.
She must sense his belief, because she rushes forward to squeeze him around the chest in a tight hug, he still tenses up a little at first, but quickly relaxes into a gentle chuckle as he catches Liam's eye roll. [Indeed, they must be related.]
"Shall we, then? Or should we just keep canoodling in the forest?" Liam interjects. Clearly anxious to set forth on their difficult journey.
"Too right, lad. It's best we get on with it. Your mother has battled the darkness alone for long enough." Killian grins as he clasps his son around the shoulder.
"As mom would say, let's buckle some swash" Eva adds excitedly.
And with that, the Jones family heads through the forest courting danger and darkness in their very first [well, his first] family adventure.