Chapter One- In Which Severus's Only Friend Calls Him A Little Bitch

Sirius Black woke to the gentle pressure of an arm draped over his waist and flesh against his bare back, and to the sound of Remus Lupin attempting to hold in a sneeze, or at least make it quiet, but it turning out as the cutest little noise Sirius had ever heard. His eyes remained shut, but he smiled, wiggling backwards slightly into Remus's chest.

The hand that was attached to the arm draped over Sirius's waist and stomach stopped fiddling with his belly button, moving up to stroke his hair.

"You awake?" Remus murmured against the back of Sirius's neck, nuzzling it gently with his nose.

"Mmm." Sirius wriggled around in Remus's arms, turning to face him, leaving only a few centimetres between their noses, and hooked a leg over Remus's knees loosely. "I don't want to go back, though."

Remus frowned. Every other year, Sirius had been so excited to see everyone at the start of the school year. "How come?" He kissed Sirius's nose reassuringly, hoping it would cheer him up.

Sirius smiled bashfully before replying. "What if they- they might not-" Sirius sighed in frustration at his inability to form words. "They might not… approve."

Remus buried his face in Sirius's neck to hide his smile. He knew that James, Lily and Peter weren't homophobic- in fact, he had his suspicions about both Lily and Peter- but it was endearing how much Sirius cared about his friends' opinions. "It'll be fine, baby boy." Remus's voice was always somewhat gravelly first thing in the morning, and Sirius groaned slightly at the combination of his lips moving against his neck, his breath brushing his skin, and the low, slightly muffled tone of his voice.

He slipped his arm underneath Remus's, hugging Remus's back and pulling them closer to each other. Sirius also knew he was being silly: his friends were completely supportive of him when his parents kicked him out because he started binding his breasts and changed his name from Serena to Sirius. He had even lived with James and his family over the summer after Fourth Year when he came out. He knew that his friends wouldn't love him any less. He just didn't want to take any chances.

"Can we just… Wait? Not long, but maybe, I don't know, until we're all settled in again… Maybe until half term?"

Remus nodded, his hair tickling Sirius's neck, causing a giggle to slip through the slightly older boy's lips. "Whatever makes you comfortable. I love you."

Sirius bit his lip, blushing. He didn't think he'd ever get used to the butterflies he felt at those words. "I love you too, Moony."

Remus kissed Sirius's neck just once before sitting up, stretching his arms upwards and clicking his back slightly. Sirius just watched appreciatively as the muscles in Remus's back flexed gently and his shoulders tensed. "What time are we leaving?"

"My mum said she'd drive us to the station at nine, so we have an hour or so. Dad's working, though, probably already left." Remus stood as he spoke, swinging his legs out from the duvet and shuffling to the side of the double bed. Sirius refused to sleep in the middle, claiming that if he didn't face straight into a wall (or curtain, considering the layout of the dormitories), he couldn't sleep, so they always ended up using such a small amount of space that they might as well be in a single bed.

The second Remus was out of the bed, Sirius grabbed handfuls of the duvet, burrito-ing in a foetal position, watching Remus as he stood at his wardrobe, pulling out clothes from his half to wear for the day. He paid special attention as Remus bent over to take a fresh pair of underwear from his drawers. Sirius loved it when Remus wore tight-fitting underwear, and that was something he would never deny while Remus was bending over.

Remus looked over to Sirius, seeing the position he was in and sighing. "You're going to need to get up soon. No point going back to sleep now." Sirius groaned, it was too early for consciousness, let alone movement.

"I'll only get up if..." He paused for effect, tapping his chin as if he had to think about what he wanted. "If you kiss me first."

Remus smiled at him, used to his little games. "Hmm… Here?" He asked, bending over Sirius and kissing his cheek.

"Nope, not quite."

"Here?" He kissed Sirius's nose, before bopping it with his finger. Sirius shook his head, frowning slightly. "What about..." He kissed all over Sirius's neck and right collarbone, eliciting a little moan, along with another head shake. Remus smiled at Sirius biting his lip: clearly his actions had a larger effect than he anticipated.

Remus chuckled before kissing Sirius's lips chastely. He moved away as fast as he could, but not before Sirius had entangled his fingers in Remus's hair and pulled him back down. Remus fell slightly at the force that Sirius used, ending up straddling the shaggy-haired boy on the bed. He gave in, running his fingers down Sirius's side as they kissed.

"Enough." Remus pulled away. "We really need to get going, and this isn't going to help."

Sirius sighed, before sitting up, pushing Remus up with him, who swung his leg back over and off the bed. "Fine."

He stood while on the bed, walking across the springy mattress and jumping off the bed. "Can you pass me some boxers? Please?"

Remus crouched, opening Sirius's underwear drawer. He frowned, turning his head back to Sirius, "You packed all your underwear, silly." He took a deep breath, before closing Sirius's drawer and opening his own, throwing a pair of his own underwear to Sirius, who caught it with a grin. "That was the plan, wasn't it?"

Sirius bit his lip, smiling cheekily before turning to face away from Remus and pulling down the boxers he'd word to bed. He stepped out of them, pulling up the new pair and turning back around to Remus, who was in the middle of pulling up his own boxers. He, however, hadn't turned around, and blushed as he hastily pulled his underwear up, blushing.

"Well, I was bound to see it one day, Reem." Sirius grinned. "Chuck me my binder, would you?"

"Sev, can you see anyone?"

"I can see a lot of people, Lily, but none who you choose to spend your time with."

Lily sighed. Severus could be a sarcastic little bitch, but she loved him. It was rare to find a friend who you could get so close to, although James was getting near that point. It wasn't like it would every go any further with Severus, though. They'd known each other for so long, it would feel weird. Even if that wasn't the case, Lily was one of the few people who Sev had told about his sexuality: Severus was asexual and aromantic, so Lily knew he'd never be interested in her anyway.

Lily peered through the crowds: mainly First years, saying goodbye to their parents for the first time. Over the short figures, she spotted a single, tall figure: Moony. "There's Remus!" She poked Severus, grabbing his arm and pulling him over to her friend.

Severus, however, shook his arm free of her grip. "They're you friends, not mine. I'll see you at school, Lil." Lily frowned, giving her friend a quick one-armed hug before pushing forwards through the crowd.

"Remus!" Lily squeezed sideways between a couple of short witches chattering nervously about the possibility of getting lost on the stair cases. "Hey- dammit, Moony, you're deaf- Lupin!"

Remus finally noticed the shorter girl standing by his left shoulder, turning his head from Sirius to Lily. "Hey, Evans!" He pulled her into a hug, firmly grasping around her shoulders. "How have you been?"

"Awesome, Moony! I went to Canada with my parents, and Petunia didn't want to come, so she stayed with her friend for the whole summer and it was amazing!" Lily grinned the whole way through without pausing for breath, gasping for air as she reached the end of her sentence. "How was your summer?" She peered around Remus to see Sirius standing on the other side of his tall frame, waving sheepishly at him. "Sirius stayed with you, right?"

Remus chuckled at her enthusiasm. "Yeah, he did, we had a great time. Right, bab- barnacle?" Sirius's voice floated over Remus's stature.

"Uh- yeah, yeah we did, dogfish."

Sirius, Lupin and James were sitting in a carriage of the Hogwarts Express, waiting for Peter to grace them with his presence. Sirius was trying to lean into Remus's shoulder inconspicuously so that James didn't notice, and James was trying his best to pretend that he hadn't noticed.

"I swear, if that tit doesn't get here soon, the train's going to leave without him." Sirius rolled his eyes at James's frustration with Peter's untimeliness, trying to snuggle further into Remus without being too obvious, before shuffling around, pulling at his binder which felt way too tight while he was in this position, with his knees up to his chest. He grunted quietly in disappointment at having to move away from Moony slightly, but swung his legs over the edge of the seat and just leaned his shoulder against the younger boy's.

The door to their compartment burst open, Peter Pettigrew stumbling through as if he'd been leaning on the door, only for it to open suddenly without him knowing and causing him to fall. Sirius jumped at the sudden intrusion, gasping in a mix of shock and a little fear. Remus went into Protective Boyfriend Mode at the sound of Sirius's unease, putting an arm around his shoulder, grabbing his arm gently, and pulling him into his chest slightly.

James laughed at Remus's slip, trying to cover it as a cough- he did a terrible job, acting never was his forte, but Remus and Sirius were too caught up in each others bodies to notice. Even Peter thought their position was a little odd when he regained his composure and balance, but said nothing as he sat a little too close to James for James's comfort.

After a moment, Remus and Sirius realised their position, scrambling away from each other in a not at all suspicions manner, shuffling to complete opposite ends of the padded bench. They each stared at their shoes determinedly, before looking up at each other, looking down at the distance between them, and breaking down into laughter.

Peter, the little dear he was, was totally oblivious to the homosexual tensions in the room: "I brought snacks!"

"Fucking finally. I don't see why the sorting hat takes so long deciding where people belong nowadays, I mean, it never gave us a chance to say anything to it about what houses we wanted to go into- which was okay, I guess, since we all ended up where we wanted- but still, equal opportunity is important, you know?"

"James. No offence mate, but you sound like a prick." Sirius was brutally honest about the situation, because, quite honestly, no one else was going to mention how much of a dick James was being, especially considering there were impressionable First years only a few places away from them.

"Fuck off, Pad. You're telling me you don't mind waiting to eat for, oh, what, ninety minutes?"

"Guys, stop, there are young ears around that don't need to here you swearing like you're having a domestic." Remus, of course, was the one to hop in with a borderline responsible comment about not swearing in front of First years.

"He's right, you know." Lily said, after swallowing a spoonful of too hot and somewhat salty soup. "You're going to make the little idiots think you're cool with the amount you're swearing." She had another mouthful. "Although, Sirius, you're little enough. Especially compared to that giant you're next to."

Sirius glared at her for that comment. He looked up at Remus, judging the angle at which he had to look up at. While it was only about twenty degrees while sitting, it was a good forty while they were both standing. "It's not that bad. At least not sitting down..."

Lily, Remus and Peter laughed at the comment. "No need to get defensive just because you're a dwarf compared to my superior height." James just grinned at the obvious flirtation between the two that the others were seemingly oblivious to. Honestly, it had been going on for about seven months now, he was amazed that no one else had cottoned on.

Lily, however, frowned as Sirius and Remus kept eye contact for at least twelve seconds before looking away, without either of them bursting into laughter. That was no staring contest, and she knew it. She just couldn't work out why they were looking at each other like that, because, while she had a bit of a reputation, Lily's mind was that of an innocent flower. Even if her body and actions weren't necessarily at the same level.

"So," James started to break Sirius and Remus's gaze, "d'you reckon we can swap our dorms around so we're in the same room?" There was a general nodding from the boys. "I vote we swap to mine. It's the one we were in for Second year, the one with the view of the lake. Plus, according to my dorm list, Adrian's with me, so that'll be an easy swap. Lily, tell Slughorn that I'll be a bad influence on Adrian, and he'll be out of that dorm in minutes, I guarantee it.

Lily nodded. "I'll talk to him now." She left the table, having finished her bowl of soup and roll, walking over to the teachers' table.

"Who else is in the dorm?" Sirius asked, wondering if there'd be anyone who would be tricky to move.

"No one special, none of them know me so they're probably all intimidated by my wondrous good looks and charm." He winked, leaning over to whisper at Sirius and Remus, knowing that Peter wouldn't hear due to his engrossment in devouring a chicken leg. "If all else fails, just tell them you two fucked on their beds in Second year. That'll get them out of there."

"What do you-"

"We're not-"

"I'm not even gay-"

"I mean, why would you-" Remus and Sirius attempted to splutter out excuses over eachother, clearly to no avail.

"Guys, stop it, this is ridiculous. I won't say anything, and it's totally fine that you're together. Just try not to be as obvious if you want to hide it, yeah? Because the others might be oblivious, but the won't be for long if you keep going at this rate."

Remus nodded. "Thanks for not, y'know, saying anything." He squeezed Sirius's hand under the table.

"Yeah, I know none of you are, like… homophobic, I'd just like to make sure no one's going to mind first?"

"Dude, I get it, you don't have to justify yourself. Ever. I love you both, yeah?"

The couple grinned at each other, and then at James.

"Yeah."

"Boys," James said, opening the door to his three-person posse who were standing outside their new/old dorm, "welcome to paradise." He stepped aside, allowing his friends to enter, pulling their luggage behind them (although, apparently, Sirius's was mainly comprised of his underwear). "And welcome back to absolutely no privacy: I will be watching you always."

James jumped onto his bed, poking his head out through the gap in the red velvet curtain. "Always."

He collapsed in laughter, falling backwards on to the bed, the others joining in with fits of ever-so-manly giggles. "Glad to see you've not changed, Prongs."

"And you, Moony."

Peter rolled his eyes. "Lovebirds."

This caused more laughter from the other three, who knew just how wrong he was.