A/N: I did a thing. For the first time in a while. A really long while. Basically, there's a new Bleach kink meme and I saw this and couldn't resist because smutty angst? But yes, it's IchiRuki. Anyone who has read my stuff here before knows I mainly write GrimmIchi - and don't worry, I still love them with my entire being - but IchiRuki also have a special place in my soul.

For those interested, the prompt was reunited sex with miss yous and crying. This fic was also written whilst wailing to ONE OK ROCK's "The Beginning"... If you've never heard of them, and you like J-rock, go listen right now. They're incredible. And this song fits IchiRuki so well.

Warnings told through a legit quote: "at first i was crying because it was sad but then i was crying because it was so hot"


The Silence Between Us/Yuzurenai Mono (What I Cannot Relinquish)

The minute he had seen her, the clouds had parted. The blade that she wielded had seemed to reflect an intangible light, and through pouring it into his soul, she had saved him a second time. The hand that she had offered him was clarity, the look he had found in her eyes was comfort. Now, they were alone in his dark room, and he couldn't put such enigmatic emotions into words. So, he reached for her delicate hands, tracing her fingers - she was really here, this wasn't another dream, she was real - before pulling her into him, wrapping her in his arms. Where she was supposed to be.

"Welcome back, Rukia."

"Idiot." She mumbled against his chest, hands moving to pull at the front of his shihakusho, trying to remove imaginary space between them. "You're the one that left."

"I know. Sorry." He whispered, scared that if he spoke any louder his voice might just break. But it would seem such efforts were in vain, as he felt her shoulders shake in his embrace, his sinuses stinging as he croaked out her name, knowing she could hear him, knowing she could respond. "Rukia."

She finally looked up at him, and he could see the tear tracks down her cheeks, lit up in the moonlight that streamed through his open curtains, her mouth twisted into a smile tinged with pain and relief. Moving a hand to cup her jaw, he traced her lips - bitten in an attempt to hold back her cries - with his thumb, before leaning down so his lips hovered over hers. "I missed you."

Rukia had no time to respond as he pressed their lips together, again and again, soft, tender pecks, as though trying to make up for the years of 'hello's, 'sleep well's, and 'stop that's that they had missed out on. She closed her eyes tight against the tears as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, sweeping her tongue against his lips, distraught that she could no longer recall just how he tasted. Opening his mouth to her, Ichigo settled his hands under her thighs, pulling her up, and she wrapped her legs around his hips as though it were second nature.

Their kisses were slow and deliberate as Ichigo carried Rukia towards his bed, finally setting her down before settling himself on his hands and knees above her. He parted their kiss, taking a moment to move back and just look at her. Her hair, shorter now that it had been, was spread around her head like an ebony halo, highlighting just how pale her perfect skin was. Her eyes were as bright as ever, swimming with emotions he knew all too well - after all, he felt them too. Her lips were wet and slightly swollen, and his heart skipped a beat as she licked them.

"You're so beautiful." His voice was quiet, and Rukia could see the tears pooling in his gorgeous almond eyes, see the heartbreak behind his half-smile. Her hands tightened around his shoulders as one of his hands moved to smooth down her side, stopping to grip her waist, his thumb tracing the underside of her breast over the fabric of her uniform. The other hand, that was resting beside her head, moved to smooth over her hair. He took another look over her, wanting to drink her image in. This was really Rukia. His Rukia. He blinked, allowing tears to fall. "I really missed you."

Rukia opened her mouth, but nothing would come out. Reaching her fingers up to his face, she wiped away the signs of his sadness, her heart burning at the sight of him crying, causing her own chest to jump with renewed sobs. She didn't know how to cope with such heavy feelings - where was she supposed to put them? She had been carrying the weight of this for so long, and now that they had found a way, now that they were finally reunited, how was she supposed to act? She felt as though she couldn't trust this as reality, couldn't believe that he wouldn't be taken away from her again any minute. She didn't want that. She didn't think her heart could cope, seeing the recognition in his eyes flicker away again.

"I missed you too. I missed you so much. Ichigo… I- I-" Her face crumpled as she fought against the tears, pushing the back of her hand against her face to cover her eyes. Taking hold of it gently, he pulled her hand away so that he could see her face. As she looked up at him, he kissed her palm before placing it at the side of his face, relaxing against it when she cupped his jaw. Before he even said it, she knew. Such words were no longer needed between them.

"I know. Me too." With that, Ichigo moved forwards, pressing their lips together once more. This time there were no light pecks, but slow, deep kisses, the kind that made stopping feel impossible. As their tongues wrapped around each other, Ichigo shifted, lowering himself gently to cover Rukia's body with his own, her legs spreading to accept him, her nails digging into the cloth covering his back as he left her mouth, teeth pulling at her bottom lip as he did so. She whimpered as she felt his lips trace her jaw, fingers sliding away her clothing as wet kisses trailed down her neck, teeth scraping at her shoulder, marking her where he had done so many times, all those years ago - somewhere easily coverable, somewhere no one else would see.

Then his mouth was back on hers, his hand moving to fumble with her obi, eventually pulling it open, and she moaned into him as she felt his fingertips on her skin, tracing imaginary lines over her stomach, her hips. Their kissing became more heated, Ichigo humming against her lips as he cupped one of her perfectly formed breasts, lightly pinching at a nipple before smoothing over her skin, squeezing slightly.

"Ichigo." Rukia gasped, bucking into his hand, causing their hips to meet for the briefest moment, a spark dancing down both of their spines. Pinching her nipple again and twisting, Ichigo pushed their hips together, more forcefully, and Rukia keened as she felt him - all of him. Wrapping her legs around him, she threw her head back as he began to slowly grind against her. The clothing between them was both an irritation and a godsend, creating frustrating friction that neither could cope with in their current state.

"These have to come off." Ichigo muttered against her neck, hooking a thumb into her hakama, swiftly pulling the fabric away, leaving her completely exposed before him.

"These too." Rukia replied breathlessly, pink heating her cheeks as she hurriedly repaid the favour, loosening his garments and pulling at them as best she could. She watched as Ichigo rose up on his knees, pulling the sleeves from his arms before pulling off his own hakama. He really had grown - he was taller, broader - her eyes strayed down his body. Bigger. She swallowed heavily, unable to stop herself from reaching out to wrap her hand around him. He hissed as he bucked into her hand, diving down to kiss her forcefully, his hands rougher as he smoothed them over her hips, her thighs, nails scraping slightly at her skin as one hand spread her legs wider, the other dragging his fingertips up her inner thigh. His caresses danced teasingly over her core before rubbing in small, gentle circles with his thumb, his fingers parting her, finding her wet and more than willing to accept him.

Her hips jerked against his touch, her mouth dropping open, and she desperately tried to concentrate on her own actions, twisting her hand over the head of his cock, spreading the precum there, making him groan. Knowing he was as excited, as desperate as she was only made her more impatient. Feeling his fingers curl inside her was the last straw.

"Ichigo, please." She whined, trying to pull him closer to her with her legs and the hand on his cock, her free hand digging her nails into his tricep, her hips squirming against the bed. He would have laughed, teased her more, had he not been feeling the exact same way. Pulling her hand from his member, he pinned it above her head, hovering over her, eyes searching hers as he led himself to her entrance. Rukia bucked as she felt his head press against her, hissed as he rocked gently, easing his way into her.

Rearing back, he thrust forwards forcefully, fully penetrating her, making them both moan loudly in unison. He stayed there a while, one hand pinning Rukia's hip to the bed, trying to stop her from moving whilst he composed himself. Being inside her again was too much. He panted into her neck, cursing when she hooked the heels of her feet into his ass, changing the angle slightly, pulling him in even closer. "If you don't stop that, this won't last very long." He whispered warningly into her ear.

"Don't care." She replied wilfully, tugging at the back of his hair to make him lift his head, before cupping his jaw and lifting her lips to his. One hand still curled around hers on the bed, he moved his other to rest against her cheek as he kissed her softly, before starting to move within her excruciatingly slowly.

Rukia didn't know what to do, what she could do - other than claw at his back, hold on to him in the hope that he could anchor her in the very storm that he himself had created. Every slight movement inside her, every caress, kiss, breath against her skin, was exquisite torture. Her eyes squeezed shut, she felt blinded, only able to feel, no longer knowing where she ended and Ichigo began. They were complete again.

"Rukia." Ichigo groaned, moving back and out of her grasp, his hands grabbing the back of her thighs, spreading her wider for him. She cried out as the angle changed, as his thrusts quickened, clawed at the sheets before covering her face with both arms. Her skin burned so hot, she thought she had been set aflame. Not satisfied with the way she was hiding from him, Ichigo hooked her thighs around his shoulders before pulling her arms apart, once more pinning her to the bed. Seeing her eyes scrunched shut, he demanded, "Look at me."

Rukia did as she was told, holding his gaze even when he slowed down again, moving his hips to grind against her clit with every thrust, making her gasp and whine. She pushed against his hands, not to get away, but wanting something to hold on to as she felt herself beginning to shake - the intensity of Ichigo's grinding, the way he filled her, pushing against all her best spots, was becoming increasingly unbearable. She unconsciously held her breath, her legs quivering embarrassingly quickly around Ichigo's shoulders. Placing a kiss on her neck, Ichigo picked up the pace just slightly, commanding, "Come for me, Rukia."

That was all it took. She threw her head back, crying out Ichigo's name as she tensed around him, kissing him back sloppily when she felt his mouth on hers. She continued to gasp out soft moans as he released her hands, as she thrust them into his hair, as he shifted again, moving her legs down to rest either side of his. When she pushed her hips against his again, Ichigo knew she had recovered, and so he began to move again, this time harder, rougher. Enjoying watching him unravel, Rukia moved back against him just as forcefully, using the hand in his hair to pull his ear towards her mouth. "Don't hold back."

Groaning at her breathless request, Ichigo gladly obeyed, driving into her with such intensity he thought he would lose his mind. Then her lips were on his neck, her nails in his back, and he snapped, spilling into her with a deep, animalistic roar, akin to the noises he would make in battle. This was Ichigo. Her Ichigo. Rukia wrapped her arms around him as he slumped forward, face burying into her neck, breath panting hot against her as he twitched inside her, aftershocks running up his spine.

Realising Rukia was probably boiling to death underneath him, Ichigo pulled out, forcing himself back up to rest on his elbows, unable to stop a stupid smile from pulling at his lips as they simply took the time to look at each other. Rukia's expression mirrored his, her heart feeling as though it would burst at the sight of him looking genuinely happy for the first time in years. This is what she had worked so hard for.

"Thank you, Rukia."

Her eyebrows pulled together slightly. "What for?"

"For not giving up." On me, he added silently.

"Idiot." She huffed, pushing a hand lazily through his hair, scratching behind his ear, tilting her head to gaze up at him from a different view. "You didn't give up either."

He nodded and fell quiet, placing a kiss against her forehead, the silence between them far stronger than any other words that could have been said.

This was their new beginning.