Title: Small steps
Pairing: GSR
Summary: tag to7x11:Leaving Las Vegas How both characters were feeling during the awkward goodbye as Grissom
is leaving
Spoilers: 7X11, Leaving Las Vegas
Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own anything, not even the shirt on my back so I asked Warrick for his. Delicious:D
A/N: I have actually only recently watched CSI from season 1 right up to the season 8 finale. I know...where have I been. This is my first attempt at a GSR fic. I'm all about the angst lol. Please let me know what you think, Good and Bad I'm always looking to improve.
A/N2: Anyone who doesnt find this completely cringing and would be happy to beta this fic and any possible future fics let me know. Thank you.
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"Hey…My cabs here."
He had mentioned the offer a few weeks ago over a casual dinner at her place, hoping for some reaction, an indication of what 'this' was between them. An Affair? A relationship? They had taken to spending nights at each others places but nothing had been carved in stone. They never made any plans or dates, there hadn't even been any real pattern at first, but now things had seemed to have fallen into their own rhythm.
She hadn't really known how to respond, unsure if he was asking her or just letting her know. They hadn't discussed what had been going on between them, if she had been his "girlfriend" it may have been the former and she would have told him that she didn't want him to leave her for four days let alone four weeks, she had enough trouble with the few nights she spent apart from him already.
But she wasn't. So she didn't.
Instead she told him that it sounded like fun and it was something to think about, and before he had had the chance to discuss it further she had moved on and the subject had closed.
When he hadn't mentioned it again for a while she'd assumed he'd decided against it. And she'd been content to continue blissfully unaware but in the back of her mind she had known that he was still considering it. It was only the other night, just as she was leaving to go to the lab that she spotted his case packed ready to go. She had stared at it for just a few moments before convincing herself he'd have told her if he was leaving.
In Grissom's mind he hadn't completely decided, he had left the case in plain sight in the hopes she would broach the subject but when she didn't, he thought that maybe the break away would be better for the both of them. To see things more clearly, a fresh set of eyes so to speak. He spent the entire night trying to think of a way to say good bye to let her know, but as each moment ticked by it became harder and harder to make a move. When the cab finally arrived he knew he'd have to find her, a part of him still silently hoping she'd ask him to stay and he knew he would.
"So you're going?"
"Yeah" Her stomach flipped as her heart screamed for her to tell him to stay, not to say goodbye, to drag him home and tie him to the bed so he could never leave her. Instead she mustered up a weak smile.
"I'll see you when you get back." It was the best she could do, a step, so very small but a step in itself. Letting him know in her own way she'd still be here waiting for him. She did her best to look at ease but she could already feel that old ache returning as she turned back to her locker.
He watched as his own heart ached, he knew that they were both as stubborn as each other as much as they both knew they loved each other neither was ready to voice their feelings but the knowledge didn't stop it from hurting any less. A part of him had at least hoped that she'd have walked him out, taken the cab with him so they could say goodbye like any normal couple….But that wasn't who they were, what they were ready for. Still this wasn't how he wanted to leave things. He glances briefly down the corridor, knowing that time is running out, any longer and he'll miss his flight, and for a moment he considers saying 'To hell with it, I can't leave you' but instead he steps in for some semblance of privacy.
As she turns back to him, He finds that his mouth is drier than it's ever been and his heart feels heavier as a million things to say come to mind. "I'll miss you." He waits for some response, preferably an admission with similar sentiments. Not trusting her voice to speak, she gives a slight nod, and as she watches him leave she takes a deep shuddering breath tightening her arms around herself as she bites back the tears.
He stands a few moments at the cab door glancing back at the entrance to the building, but he knows she won't follow. He drops his head and get in to the cab leaving a part of himself behind.
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End! Thanks for reading. Please Review