Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter
OTP Boot Camp Challenge: Sacrilegious
Sacrilegious
Tom could never understand how someone as pure and innocent as Harry would ever be attracted or willing to even communicate to someone as sinful as he was. Tom felt like it was almost sacrilegious every time he was able to hold Harry in his arms or kiss the other boy, as if he was somehow rubbing off his darkness on the bright white that Harry was, ruining it.
He could never believe how Harry even managed to remain in his presence knowing as much about Tom's bloody past and ruthless present. Tom had done nothing to deserve someone as pure and kind as Harry was. Tom knew that and constantly told Harry of the same fact. Harry never listened to him when Tom brought that up, quickly changing the topic or giving Tom a look that told Tom exactly how unimpressed Harry was with Tom's line of thought. Tom wondered how Harry could possibly defend his actions within his mind. Harry made it seem almost like he did not care or never noticed anything that went on around him.
Tom had been terrified when Harry had found out about everything he had done, every death he had directly or indirectly caused, every person he had tortured already. Tom had expected Harry to leave him, to be horrified at Tom's true nature and wish to stay far away from Tom, that would have been the expected response had it been anyone else but Harry had done none of that.
Tom had been shocked when Harry had simply told him that he had known of Tom's nature all along. Tom expected Harry to be bothered with his actions somehow but Harry was not, simply telling Tom that killing was in his nature and that Harry would not be able to do anything about it except calm Tom when he was angry so that Tom would kill and torture fewer people than he would otherwise. Harry had said all this with eyes that seemed much older than Tom knew Harry to be, eyes that had seen far too much and had experienced what no one Harry's age should have experienced.
It felt sacrilegious to love someone like Harry but Tom could not help but do so. Tom feared the day that Harry would tell him that he could no longer continue to watch as Tom harmed people without a second thought. Tom feared the day that Harry would wake up and leave him after seeing him for the monster he truly was.
Tom had a feeling Harry knew exactly what Tom was doing whenever he tried to shield Harry from the horrors that he could not help but continue doing. Tom was trying to cling on to Harry's gentle nature and calmness, Tom was trying to cling on to Harry as if Tom would lose Harry to the world that had hated Tom ever since Tom had been a young child in the orphanage, amid seas of strangers that try to punish Tom for mistakes whether those mistakes were perceived or not.